yanattheloom

Latest Posts by yanattheloom

Telling the teenage boy who has to adjust his voice, gestures, fashion and interests to avoid seeming gay that he's "homophobia exempt" because he isn't gay

"you don't get it, the usa is a fascist country full of government propaganda, and our rights as women and queer people are constantly attacked!! you have no idea what that's like!!" i'm hungarian 👍

I'll take "things that didn't happen" for 500, please.

So I kind of want to unpack this because it's phrased like the literary equivilant of barbed wire and people keep getting caught on snags. And what is being said here is heinous enough that I think it should be presented plainly

(A solid post on the topic here by @velvetvexations, who got into the psychology of it. I wanted to expand from a logic/phrasing perspective)

Lets tackle that second paragraph piece by piece

First, this sentence which is objectively true. Cisgender perisex* women have systematic cisgender privilege, so, for example they aren't affected by things like restrictions on access to HRT/Transition Surgery or being forcibly outed to transphobic individuals or institutions. While they can still experience individual transphobia(see gnc presenting individuals), they still have access to that systemic cisgender privilege. I just want to put a pin in the fact that this is true of all cis people over all trans people. Trans people of any kind do not have cis privilege, because they are not cis. Including closeted and stealth trans individuals. To use my own example, both of them would be affected by restrictions to HRT access, even if they are "percieved" as cis.

So when I say cis privilege later on keep all that in mind

Statement A: Cis women have privilege over trans women

*I am not intersex, it is just my understanding from reading intersex individuals experiences that while intersex people can be cis, they do not have access to the cisgender privilege outlined here. Please correct me if I am wrong

She says this to deflect from the fact that that is the conclusion she is directly going to build to. It's about the same as saying "I'm not saying men of color are uniquely violent, I'm just pointing out that statistically they commit most crime"

Now lets unpack the less straightforward part

A reminder: this isn't about closeted trans men. It would still be reductive if it were, but look back at the original ask. This is about all non-passing trans men

(Though both the asker and answerer seem to use "passing" as a synonym for "stealth". you can pass but not be stealth, plenty of trans people are out publically)

(An aside: The language the asker uses here seems pretty suspect, treating "non-passing" as identical to being percieved as cis. While we could argue that they meant closeted, the answerer does not contest this point and instead uses it as the base to opine on trans men as a whole, so I am going to make the assumption that she is in agreement with the base premise)

Statement B: All non-passing trans men are percieved and treated identically to cis women.

As noted re:the askers uncontested language, this group seems to include trans men at any stage of transition. Either they pass as men or they are considered cis women, with no inbetween.

Statement C: This is a privilege

Statement C is one of the snags here, because the answerer uses "male privilege" here, which when combined with Statement B can be read as "cis women have male privilege", which is absurd. But thats a snag, the meat of the statement is different. She's calling it male privilege but goes on to define it as a privilege specifically and exclusively trans women don't have, which isn't what male privilege is(see: cis women). Why she is using the phrase wrong I don't know, but lets just simplify it down to what Statement C says: it is a privilege of some form. We will get into the form

Statement D: Trans women do not have this privilege because they are seen as trans

So the privilege is conferred based on being cis(or the appearance of), and non-passing trans men have it because they are "only" seen as functionally identical to cis women.

So, trans women lack this privilege because they are discriminated against on the basis of being seen as trans specifically, while trans men have it because they are seen as cis. Discrimination based on being trans is transphobia.

Statement E: Trans men do not experience transphobia because they are seen as cis

Consider in the context of the first statement. Cis women have privilege over trans women. Trans men have privilege over trans women because cis women have privilege over trans women. Cis women have this privilege because they are cis, so calling it male privilege was an obfuscation

And this part puts to bed the whole "maybe they meant closeted" arguement. The answerer identifies that the privilege specifically stems from transmasculinity.

Thus,

Statement F: All trans men, regardless of the stage of transition, are seen as cis because they are transmasculine.

Conclusion: Trans men have cis privilege

Do we see how this arguement has become completely disconnected from reality yet?

And this isn't part of the original exchange, but I wanted to quickly discuss this bit

"May have been traumatic and horrible for you"

"You still get to be one"

Look at the phrasing here. You still "get" to be one. Womenhood is the ideal state which confers privilege and is inherently desirable. If you don't want it, there is something wrong with you specifically. Womanhood cannot be traumatizing on its own merits, it can only be traumatizing because you are broken in some way and can't appreciate how good it is.

In a quick two sentences, it makes clear the incredibly cruel statement "misgendering is a privilege. you should be grateful they are doing this to you"

Corn

something that I think might be missing a bit from discussions about transandrophobia (specifically when it comes to saying that it's just transphobia/misogyny, or that the only oppression trans guys face is being erased or infantilised) is that this literally is not the case for a lot of trans guys. transphobes do not see me as a "soft feminine confused stolen daughter", they see me as a predator trying to take their daughters from them. I am harassed and threatened out of the women's restrooms I'm forced in to, they think my testosterone makes me angry and violent, they think I am converting their "daughters" to transgenderism, they think I'm transitioning to perv on their sons. it's important to talk about the harm that invisibility and infantilization causes, but do not act like the oppression that trans men face stops there.

TRANS MEN ARE NOT CIS WOMEN TRANS MEN ARE NOT CIS WOMEN TRANS MEN ARE NOT CIS WOMEN TRANS MEN ARE NOT CIS WOMEN TRANS MEN ARE NOT CIS WOMEN TRANS MEN ARE NOT CIS WOMEN TRANS MEN ARE NOT CIS WOMEN TRANS MEN ARE NOT CIS WOMEN TRANS MEN ARE NOT CIS WOMEN TRANS MEN ARE NOT CIS WOMEN TRANS MEN ARE NOT CIS WOMEN

SOME TRANS MEN MIGHT ALSO IDENTIFY AS CIS WOMEN BUT THAT IS NOT THE MAJORITY OF TRANS MEN

AND MOST OF US ARE NOT TREATED AS CIS WOMEN JUST BECAUSE WE DONT PASS

A LOT OF US ARE INTERSEX AND HAVE HIRSUTISM OR ARE VERY VISIBLY TRANS OR GENDER NONCONFORMING AND WE GET TREATED LIKE SHIT FOR IT BY SOCIETY BECAUSE WE ARE QUEER AND OPPRESSED

STOP PRETENDING LIKE YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE EXPERIENCE OF TRANS MEN WHEN YOURE A TRANS WOMAN THAT DOESNT KNOW A GODDAMN THING ABOUT US OR OUR OPPRESSION

CALLING TRANS MEN "CIS WOMEN" IS SO DEEPLY TRANSPHOBIC ON ITS OWN JESUS FUCKING CHRIST

It also bothers me how aspecs have been conditioned to not take up space. If you do anything more serious than a vent joke, you're being dramatic and faking oppression. If you demand to be taken seriously in the conversation, you're being childish and annoying. If you speak up about the role that erasing aspec identities plays in the preservation of heteronormativity, you're an idiot. If you implore to be heard in talks about queer issues, you're wasting resources and being ridiculous. Our points of view are thrown aside, we're only tolerable if we're harmless and let others advocate for us, and god forbid we ask our supposed allies to deconstruct their biases, cuz then we're mean and know nothing about the world. It's exhausting.

i think it's really funny that the "kill all men" crowd are totally fine with calling for genocide, but the moment you say "i hate people who say KAM" they start crying about how unfair it is to hate people for their 'beliefs'. like damn i thought the people calling for genocide would have a bit more of a fucking backbone, but ig calling for genocide requires you to be a spineless fucking coward so i shouldnt be surprised

“Why should a French or a German citizen be born with access to world-class services and well-protected rights (actual implementation on the basis of minority status may differ), while a Somalian citizen is not only denied those things, but also faces huge obstacles in becoming a citizen (or even a resident) of anywhere else? If you are born a citizen of Japan, there are 190 countries you can travel to freely without a visa; if you are a citizen of Afghanistan, there are only 25. If you are born a U.K. citizen, and feel like a change of scene, you can pay $7 for permission to go to Canada, hop on a flight, and stay for up to six months without anyone bothering you. If you are born in a refugee camp, it can take years before you even get a chance to live in a place like Canada. So how can we possibly consider ourselves to be people who care about freedom and autonomy, when thanks to borders our destinies are practically assigned to us at birth? Is it absurd to form your own state? Or is it more absurd to have states in the first place?”

— Aisling McCrea, No Man Is An Island?

discrimination is when sex toys apparently

discrimination is when sex toys apparently

doechiis makeup lips. collage created by swamphottie on twitter.

Giving away a tooth fairy doll this month, through a "name to win" contest over on my patreon.

Open to all current and new $6 Jester Jackpot tier supporters; who can suggest up to FOUR names for a chance to take this doll home.

(Ends May 30th. I ship internationally from Ireland, at no extra cost to the winner)

record set for me having 3 mutuals who love transmission towers & pylons. next i will be shooting for mutuals interested in spring making machines

Hope I'm not derailing at all, but I had a very similar experience trying to get breastforms for a friend of mine.

Can't make this up, one of the only two companies we found that made breast forms for darker skin just didn't fucking bother colouring in the areolas.

For the record, the lighter toned breastform they made had them colored in. It was literally only the one geared towards Black people that didn't. I genuinely cannot think of any good faith explanation for this.

Roughly speaking, we could find 1-4 light skin toned breastforms per company. After going through god knows how many, we found two geared towards black people, and one of them was the aforementioned No Areola breastform. And if you had anything in the middle, you were simply shit out of luck, as my friend was.

I have had better luck finding packers and straps for more varied skin tones where I am, but evidently that's not a universal experience.

So I'm starting this thing with this guy and I went to an *ahem* adult goods store because my previous harness is a modified pair of briefs that was tight when I was about 20lbs lighter and most assuredly I do not fit anymore and he's coming over in 2 weeks so I don't quite trust shipping atm

But also within that store was genuinely nothing that could even be close to my skin tone. They had "realistic" white skintones, bright purple and pink, and a few solid black or solid grey. Nothing in browner skin tones.

And it just reminded me of how much antiblackness is baked into society. That the only realistic penis is apparently one that belongs gs to a white man, and that black bodies are so undesirable while white bodies are considered the default.

"forward"

<3

cute nails ✮

slug & snail nails by annaxnailz

Sailor Moon Skylines