Latest Posts by brock08 - Page 3

I still mean everything I said, I still think you’re absolutely gorgeous, and I am truly glad that you’re happy.

If you’re reading this post right now you’re really cute.

Wisdom 🙌🙌🙌

Today is makes 8 months of sobriety from Alcohol, and substances. I’m so fucking proud of myself!! Sucks that I had to walk away from everyone to achieve it, so there’s no one to celebrate it with, but just knowing I did it on my own makes it that much better.

Always 😁

My goal each and every single day

Just a friendly reminder, the moss loves you and the mushrooms think your kinda cute.

Sorry my blogs a mess

So am I

Life has been interesting to say the least. I’m finally looking forward to wrapping up my legal issues even though it’s on the same day I turn 34. Guess it’ll be my present to myself, and proof that I’m growing. This past year or so has taught me a lot about myself and a lot of the things I thought I knew. It’s an understatement to say that it’s been rough, but, sometimes pain is the best teacher. I have survived, I will preserve, I won’t give up, and I will continue to improve. This chapter might have been a bit dark, but the next one might be the best yet.

Thank you for proving that I deserve so much better.

Just hurts and is kind of bullshit you have to be this petty. I wanted better with you, and despite everything you’ve done, I still care about you and will always be there if you need a friend. What we had was and will always be special to me. I wish we could have been so much more, but clearly, you’ve made your decision.

Who knows maybe we’ll meet again under different circumstances or in another life and we’ll get another chance. You’ve got an absolutely gorgeous soul, please don’t hide it forever. Be well and find peace Princess.

Things continue to head in the right direction, court went well, and things weren’t nearly a bad as I thought. Two misdemeanors, not the felony I thought they were trying to charge me with. Almost have the new place ready to move in, got a puppy, and work is starting to go smoother so I won’t have to work so many hours. Plus have a whole week off for thanksgiving. Finally got most of the kinks worked out of the xterra and it’s running really well. Thinking about finally cutting my hair but I’m not sure if I should🤷🏻‍♂️? Maintaining my sobriety from alcohol, it’s actually starting to get way easier, I don’t really have the urge to drink anymore. Staying busy and being productive have really helped a lot lately, finally feeling like I can pick my head up again. If I’ve made it through all of the things I have this past year, I can survive just about anything. It’s been a rough one but, I’m so glad I worked though it with a little bit of help from a few great people.😁

Glad to see you’re doing well, would have loved to talk to you but not the time or place. I’ll respect your wishes, and wait for you to ready to talk if you ever are. I really do still miss you, and hope things with your family and health are going better. I’m still confused and kinda struggling to find my way after everything, but I really do wish nothing but good things for you. I really hope you haven’t lost sight of the beautiful soul you tried so hard to hide, and realize that you do deserve to be loved and cared about. I still think you’re absolutely gorgeous, and I will always be here if you want or need to reach out.

I still miss you every single day

Well, the Xterra is finally running again, just some little things to fix. I found a place to move into so I’m no longer homeless, even got offered another place to stay on the same day. Picked up a second job doing farm work and construction. Things are going really well today, and some of my stress is finally starting to go away. Now just to figure out everything with the court and get that taken care of and life will be somewhat back to normal.

I’ve now been single for 10 months, sober from alcohol (besides one night) for over a month, and back in the kitchen for over 2 months. There have been lots of ups and downs, a few really bad downs, and a few pretty good things happen. There’s still a few hurdles to get over but I’ve survived everything thus far, so I’m sure I’ll be just fine. I’m glad I’ve made it through and used it to rebuild myself and come out a stronger, more focused person who is more true to myself than ever. There’s always more work to be done, but like I said, I’ve survived everything else.

Just over two weeks sober from alcohol, and it feels great, it’s taking some getting used to, but for sure was a choice for the better. Always pushing forward, never settling for less then where I want to be.

Well, life took an interesting and unexpected turn, and I had to move out of the place I had quickly. Looks like I’ll be living the rv life for a couple weeks or until I find another place. The quiets not so bad and I guess it’s nice to have time completely to myself. It’s kind of peaceful only having work and myself to worry about. Still fighting with the xterra but I’m at least a few steps closer to having it on the road.

God I hate myself for not having an outlet or friends that care because I fucked shit up. So I go to the bar because I don’t want to be surrounded by fighting between my housemate and her bf, and I don’t want to go back to drugs. It’s sucks to be off drugs, and trying your hardest to actually grow the fuck up and take care of shit for once only to be seen as what you’ve been in the past. Recovery is one of the hardest fucking things I’ve done, but it’s the best decision I have ever made, and I’m proud of myself for how far I’ve come.

I wish we would have treated both ourselves and each other better. I’m sorry I lost my mind, and any respect for myself. I’m still always here if you want to reach out. I still care and I still want to be in each other’s lives. I get it if that’s not possible when you’re in a relationship, and I’ll respect that. Hell, I don’t even know if you want me around at all. I just know I miss you so incredibly much.

Time to quit drinking again, while the momentary numbness is kinda nice, it’s not really doing anything for me but turning me against myself and pushing all those I care about away. So let’s try this whole sobriety thing out again, it’s going to be rough at first, especially alone. I know it will be more than worth it in the end. I can’t keep doing this to myself, I’ve thrown away too much already.