If I Die My Funerals Gonna Be The Biggest Fucken Party And You’re All Invited 

me: not today, satan 

satan: you’ve been canceling our plans for weeks now. if it’s something i said, please just tell me

#the gayest scene to ever gay

Home is where the water tastes normal.

No one:

Absolutely no one:

Dick Grayson:

Source

HEADCANON: Harry is one of those dorks that talks into a banana pretending it’s a phone, except he does it ALL THE TIME. Like, every single time there is a banana in the house, Harry just /has/ to pick it up and go “hello?” And one day Draco is just completely fed up, so he charms the bananas to talk. So Harry picks up a banana and says “Hello?” and the banana answers, “Hey, dude, how’s it going?” and Harry screams and throws the banana across the room. Draco will tell the story at parties for years to come.

“I will not beg you for your time or try to convince you to choose me, the world is too big and I have too much to offer.”

— Unknown

english: coconut oil

french: :)

english: oh boy

french: oil of the nut of the coco

Pansy & Hermione, at a bar

Hermione: Yoga helps you look and feel better naked.

Pansy: So does tequila. *downs 5 shots in a row*

Hermione: *stares at Pansy*

Pansy: See, you already can’t keep your eyes off me.

Me: Nah, I'm not getting my hopes up.

Narrator: Her hopes, were in fact, up.

A Surprise Pride and Prejudice Engagement

(Note: This isn’t me)