pmeep

Latest Posts by pmeep

same

god these violent delights are fucking AWESOME lol. having a great time. btw does anybody know what we're doing after this

guy in the frozen food aisle walking around with his hands behind his back like he's at a museum

polyamory would not always fix the love triangle. sometimes it would make it much, much worse. but they should do it anyway

in this baeutiful world. straight up "enjoing it". and by "it". haha. well. let's justr say. My frands

Person who wants to do stuff trapped in a body that needs to lie down

"its a texas chainsaw miracle"

when you’re on your period you’re like am I just on my period or am I feeling all the loneliness and pain I’ve been feeling since i turned 12

its quite easy to make noises. oouugghhhh. aaaaauuuhhh. uwaaaaaaa. awawaaa. it comes naturally to me

anyone else destroying and betraying themselves for nothing 🤣

google is it too late? google can i still be saved? google will i be okay?

Another day of being a sweetiepie. Just clocked in

im getting my oil changed and i heard the mechanic go "tee hee hee". whats happening

guy who only heard the phrase gaslighting once and is misremembering it: stop fleshlighting me

i accidentally hit a bug and totaled my car

i got my new tetanus shot who wants to play bucket of rusty nails withme ^_^

my job in the leftist commune is babybel unwrapper and everyone wants to fuck me

sorry everyone it turns out gods mercy is finite & i just used up the last of it

sory i bought polymer clay earings from uour wifes etsy store and cast one of her thumprints and used it to access your family safe and i stole your comically large bagof money with dolar signs painted on it

[first day as a hostage negotiator]

bank robber: these rich fucks ruined me life! I want ten million dollars and a helicopter

me: bitch me too. I'm switching sides

it's me boy, the medieval scribe speaking to you inside your brain. listen to me boy. draw in the margins of your notes instead of paying attention

Amphibiuary 2024.

Day 28: Repeat

Pls hire me for textbook illustrations

looks up at you with big eyes do i really have to have money to survive or can i be a useless faggot forever

I do wholeheartedly believe Wes Anderson is a sick sick freak. I like his movies but I definitely think this guy has like a hidden room in his spacious french apartment that he slips into quietly each night and it is just filled with tiny little doll replicas of all the actors he's ever used in any of his movies and he puppets them around and mimicks their voices and shit. and sometimes he'll text Owen Wilson pictures of his little doll with a comb or something from an untraceable number and pair it with like "see how I take care of you Owen?" and then the following day Owen Wilson will find him at the service table and go, "Geez Wes look at this," and Wes will pretend to be all concerned and horrified but there is this calculating almost eager look in his eyes that unsettles Owen Wilson. and the next time Wes is having a little soiree with all his actors, his beloved beloved actors, maybe Owen Wilson will accidentally get lost on his way to the beautiful bathroom and find that little room and see all those dolls and his throat will hitch with horror. And before he can call Bill Murray or Adrian Brody to look a dark silhouette will appear in the doorway and Wes looks sort of resigned when he says, "I see you finally found my secret, Owen," and Owen Wilson will try and pretend that he's fine with it but they both know better. and Wes will go (the look in his eyes back again) "We both know this can't get out, right?" and he'll grin very suddenly and Owen Wilson will laugh along very nervously and leave the room and eat some brioche and when the evening is over he will rush over to his Prius and frantically click his keys but over the cobbles on the beautiful beautiful street there is the sound of footsteps. and tears are running down Owen Wilson's cheeks but he can't say a word and Wes, emerging from the shadows, will gently touch him on the shoulder and say, "look, I'll drive you to the airport, huh?" and Owen Wilson will try to refuse but they both know it's futile. and, halfway through the drive, Wes Anderson will smile and say, "I'll miss working with you" and then perfectly jump and roll out of the car, wiping off his corduroy pants, while Owen Wilson's Prius swerves into a local patisserie, bursting into flames

Lol my large and handsome pig didn’t find Anything of interest in your yard

Freelancing in technical theater means you’re on a lot of different email lists. People need a crew, they send out an email, you respond with your availability. Now, most people start these with things like “hey folks” or “hi everyone”. Neal is not most people.

His openers started off innocent enough.

Then, he started to push boundaries.

And as you can see, it has spiraled out of control since then.

god if there was a book of forbidden spells I wouldn’t even hesitate

my number one skill is being sooo cute and my number two skill is the ancient curse