Tw Dis0rdered E@ting - Blog Posts
Reblog if you’re looking for 3d moots this February!!!
imagine failing at being dis0rder3d, couldn’t be me!!!
(it’s me wtf is happening)
*Skinny Reasons-~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
1. Bikinis. Imagine soft sun on your skin, eyes following every move, admiration, envy, power.
2. Tans that mean something. Bronze skin only glows when there's a body worth showing.
3. Belly rings. Silver glint on flat skin. No rolls, no shame, just sparkle and softness.
4. High-waisted dreams. Shorts that don't dig in, crop tops that kiss your ribs, denim hanging loose like they were made just for you.
5. To be the skinny friend. The one they whisper about, the one they copy but can never become.
6. Control. Every skipped meal is proof you’re stronger than your urges.
7. Thigh gaps. Delicate space between your legs, the kind that only girls in magazines seem to have.
8. Boys looking twice. Not out of pity. Out of want.
9. Aesthetic everything. Oversized sweaters, low-rise jeans, silk skirts with nothing clinging.
10. Mirror peace. No more war with your reflection. Just soft pride in quiet bone lines.
11. Fragile beauty. The kind that looks effortless. Ethereal. Breakable. Wanted.
12. Revenge body. Every second of silence, of rejection, turned into something worth staring at.
13. Photos you don’t have to hide from. No more angles, no more edits.
14. To feel light. Physically, emotionally. To float in rooms instead of shrinking in corners.
Goals🩷🪽
@na motivation
Was it worth it you ask yourself.
But once the flavour is gone it’s never worth it!
Every Single time.
And yet you still pick up the fork,you still eat!
Once the food is gone the only thing that takes its place is regret,fat and the further you become from your goals.
Choose sacrifice now and you’ll be rewarded later.
Choose comfort now and you’ll be punished later.
It’s up to you,as it always has been don’t be a slave to food be a slave to your goals.!
Would I prefer to satisfy a thirty minute craving or have the body I’ve craved for a lifetime ?
Hey, I'm back (ㆁωㆁ)
Sorry for leaving so long I was ashamed bc of binging for like a week or more straight. (Such a fat ass now gained like 2.5 Ibs) Hopefully getting back on track tomorrow :3
i think i have to accept i’m building muscle
pros are burning cals at rest but cons are A HIGHER WEIGHT ON THE SCALE ARFGHG
when i was eating normally last week i probably started growing smth but still
is the wellness lifestyle for me?? xx
body positivity activists when you’re shaped somewhere in between thin and average
cannot wait until i find myself a drug dealer later and immediately ask for a tub of adderal
tw long ana rant
i’m so pissed off rveruday is a battle to convince myself that i need help, that i’m not a wannarexic, that my body is normal maybe a little skinny, that it’s not abt what i eat but how i think but i can’t fucking believe ANYTHING
i can’t thr0w up to save my life i can’t relate when ppl say “i could never eat all that” bc ik damn well i could. i could eat that entire plate and still be hungry for seconds. for desert.
no matter how many times i remind myself i’m literally -ving, that i’m weak and knee-deep into this ed i can’t believe it
bc i don’t look sick enough. no one can tell i’m fucked up except for my friends who probably know by now. only they know i refuse to eat yet the second i break my fast i’ll gorge on anything near me.
not all of my bones are showing yet, only the normal ones that every skinny person alr has.
no matter how many hours i’ve fasted i’ve never fainted once. sure, maybe i’ve come close to that at times but that still means no one will ever know bc they’ve never seen me do it.
every time i come into school it’s the same bullshit every. single. day i’m so tired of it
i see thinspo in all of my classes and they all wish they weren’t skinny, talking abt how they wish they looked healthier or smth
“i skipped breakfast this morning bc i forgot/wasn’t hungry”, “stop i eat sooo much idk how i’m so skinny!”, “we’re such big backs for eating chips”
SHUT UPPP
who the hell loses their appetite when they’re stressed. who loses their appetite at ALL and why does it never happen to me whether i’m binging or -ving???
when i move out i’m gonna have a big fridge full of nothing
parents coming back home saved me from a terrible binge at 7am sharp
god what is wrong with me
the problem is i can follow instructions on recipes so i create delicious deserts that are now in my face 24/7
take these blueberry muffins for example. ohmigod they’re the best sensory experience ever n i never thought muffin batter was yummier than cookie dough
thank u sammie
https://sugarspunrun.com/blueberry-muffins-from-scratch/
recovery will never be an option i fear
i’m so destroyed mentally that i’ll just feel worse if i fix my relationship w food bc i’ll still be lacking everywhere else in my life
i’ll always be anxious, a people pleaser and terribly jealous of everyone else
my stomach is flat from being -ved but the bottom. it won’t fucking LEAVE
it’s like i can’t even wear a crop top bc it looks so off
broke my fast with cookie dough again who’s surprised
if i ever had to omad only one food for the rest of my life it would be these cookies
they take up literally all of my afternoon every time i make them but they’re so worth it
also ignore the 500cal per cookie i need u to ignore them so u won’t go insane
pls try them on days u don’t feel awful abt food i beg
idk why i run to the mirror every time i go to the bathroom thinking im gonna get the bc of the century
i can get so much worse im not anywhere near my limit
i haate ppl that try to pass off “harsh skinny tips” as healthy weight loss and not borderline disordered like u are in DENIAL
i have small dog syndrome but in the way that it’s my ed in its loser corner of my brain that keeps shouting mean things every fucking second
hmmm yeah im actually healthier when im weak and frail rather than fed and energized why do u ask
WHITE STRAWBERRIES R SO YUMM
the whole box (10oz) is 96 c@ls btw but i would explode before doing that
once summer comes i don't think i'll feel as trapped inside with my ed and actually live a fulfilling life outside of being the thinnest I can be.
this disorder is so lame ngl the only thoughts running through my head are preparing for a beach body like omg get a life
i immediately get humbled anytime someone mentions how they haven't eaten anything all day long bc whoopsie they forgot
like i have to deliberately ignore the hunger and they don't even have to think abt it like goshh
poemy rant
Nobody ever called me fat. Nobody ever said there was something wrong with my body, ever.
Yet I am the one who chose to inflict this mentality upon myself. My stomach and thighs suddenly doubled in size one day when I realized most of my friends carried smaller bodies. They never had to think once about losing weight because they were already naturally gifted with those bodies. They didn't have to eat less or exercise. But most importantly, they were happy with what they had. They weren't miserable like me, wishing I could cut the fat off using my bare hands.
It makes me sad whenever I see them snacking or buying a whole box of donuts at the grocery store just because they feel like it. They don't think twice about the calories and how much they're allowed to eat for the rest of the day. They even mock me for checking the calories every time and warn me about how many I'm about to ingest if I take a bite out of an unhealthy snack. They've repeatedly told me they don't see anything wrong with my body and how they wish they had thighs like me because theirs are too thin.
So why do I feel like this? Where did this come from? When did having a flat stomach and stick legs become my goals?
Nothing ever feels good enough anymore. I look at the scale some mornings and bawl my eyes out because it's not the number I want to see, even though I'm technically underweight. But I don't feel like that at all. I'll consider myself underweight when there is no fat left to jiggle when I run, and no extra skin to pinch or poke at. When I'm running so low on energy I can feel my brain shutting off, my legs trembling and ultimately collapsing. I'll be on the ground, limp and exhausted as I fall into a deep sleep.
I'll be desolate, but I'll be thin. I'll be happy in a bikini just like my friends, proudly showing off the body I worked so hard for.
Hopefully.
i just wanna have a friend that's just as disordered as me irl. We would talk without feeling judged and give each other motivation. it's rlly another pointless fantasy about having cool and understanding friends I wish could be with me.
ahh but for now i can only hope for someone like that to come along eventually. i kinda need them rn but it's fine I can wait.
being nervous/excited is the best laxative trust
my fav thinspo recently is just looking at belly button piercings bc hard work will pay off in cuter fits ♡