4norexi4 - Blog Posts
il punto è che amo mangiare.
ma odio la sensazione di pienezza, di sazietà, la nausea.
odio il modo in cui trasforma il mio corpo, il suo continuo depositare grasso sulla pancia, sulle gambe, sulle braccia, sulla faccia.
odio il fatto che, per mangiare anche solo una mela, debba sbottonare i pantaloni, perché il mio addome si gonfia così tanto che non ce la faccio a sentire la pressione dei bottoni contro di esso.
odio il fatto che io non possa più vestirmi come una volta, perché non mi va più niente di ciò che mi piace, e perfino la gente attorno a me ha notato che vesto solo di tute e maglie larghe ormai.
odio i sensi di colpa dopo ogni pasto, odio il pentimento che deriva dall'aver mangiato l'ultimo boccone anche quando stavo già per sboccare, odio il fatto che io sia l'unica delle persone che conosco a non avere un bel fisico, soprattutto da nuda, e ciò mi fa vergognare terribilmente poiché sono fidanzata.
odio tutta questa rabbia repressa per me stessa, odio tutti questi dannati chili di troppo.
e un po', talvolta molto più di "un po'", odio me stessa per aver permesso che ciò accadesse, per aver permesso a questo corpo di diventare com'è ora.
13/10/22, ore 02:38.
im baaaack. fell off the wagon a bit 😔 but I have prom in June so I NEED to lose as much weight as possible. I ain't gonna be remembered as the fat bitch. I refuse 🖐️😒
tell me why tiktok decides to show me food videos when I'm relapsing? like bitch, let me ⭐ve in peace 😮💨
I dont ⭐ve just because I hate myself.
I ⭐ve because my grief does the eating for me.
I started going on walks with my friend (I'm running up and down a hill on my own to burn calories when I eat)
I find that one of the worst things about fasting is that I constantly feel sick. yet when I do eat, I can't keep it down. I get so nauseous even when I drink water, but watching the numbers on the scale drop makes it all worth it 😊
wanting someone to notice that I'm not ok but the urge to keep going is so much stonger. I want to be rotting inside before they realise
being bigger than my sister is honestly so embarrassing for me. she's 15 years older than me and I'm still fatter than her. I want to carve the fat off my body until there's nothing left but skin and bones
3 days on liquids? Challenge accepted
Does anyone else feel better about their body since relapsing?? Like I used to sit at the mirror and nitpick everything wrong with my appearance but now I'm just like 'damn, I look good. Once I lose a few kilos I'll look great'
I thought I was the smallest out of all my friends so i was only gonna restrict calories for another week but it turns out one of thems taller than me but still only 46 kilos I'm going fucking crazy why can't that be me
Anyone have any tips for not getting dizzy/fainting while fasting? I’m prone to passing out or getting really light headed when fasting
The best thinspo I swear is looking at photos of yourself at your lowest weight and seeing how fat you’ve let yourself get.
What are some of your guys favorite low calorie, high volume food?
Introducing me:
Hii, i’m märta!
a bit of info about me;
•pro recovery ofc!
• struggle with binge eating!
• minor
• have strict parents so tips about that’d be great!
• feel free to dm any time about anything!
• dni if; homophobe, anti @na, transphobe, racist, a creep or anything similar thx🥰
• always open for new friends!
and lastly, i’m kinda new so dont be scared to tell me if i do anything thats considered ’weird’ or strange on here!
Partner answered the door to the next door neighbour complaining about a leak. Right as I was dishing up dinner. Partner then went to try and fix the leak, leaving me enough time to dispose of my dinner and pretend I ate it already. Happy Maisy.
Actually, going to get changed and put on a corset.
Saw someone else post this and it’s been my biggest inspiration
Something about seeing ribs just makes me want to never eat again
Putting these as widgets so I never forget why I’m doing this
how tf do i explain to my bf that i’m scared of calories… like bro is literally a gym guy and eats every hour
i got added into a ed gc and honestly it’s awkward bc idk what to say and no one has said anything in it 😀 so pls send tips for what i should do
i need new low cal recipes i’m getting tired of the ones i have :/
look at how cute this is