Latest Posts by purplegrapefruit - Page 8

Weird stuff my sleep deprived friends say as incorrect quotes 3/?

*in college*

Marshall: so ted, how's life?

Ted: life was. Life will be. Life is happening right now.

Marshall: you're high, aren't you?

Ted: you mean tall? Yeah I'm like 6 feet

Weird stuff my sleep deprived friends say as incorrect quotes 2/?

Andy: *sings loudly*

Jim: hey, have you ever thought of going to like a singing contest or something?

Andy: no, actually.

Jim: good, don't.

Weird stuff my sleep deprived friends say as incorrect quotes 1/?

Magnus bane: glitter is the new black! Weeee!!

Lol i saw the blooper right after this and it is amazing😂 Alyson yelling "I KISSED NEIL!" is truly a blessing

“…if I were Lily’s husband..”

Kinda cringie, ngl

100% me

#when you lose your mixtape

Wow, real clever marshall.

LOUDER FOR THE PEOPLE IN THE BACK

“Robin, to end up with a man who wanted you but wanted nothing to do with your choices,
 cared nothing for all the times you said NO,
 set up a string quartet and roses in your living room anyway, a man who mishandled you start to finish in the name of romance and the grand gesture— Robin, to end up with a man more in love with the idea of love than with you must seem like some kind of cosmic betrayal, must seem so season one pre all that character development. I know that after years of the same tired back and forth, it must be easy to mistake poor scripting for fate. But, listen to me: fuck the grand gesture. Robin, FUCK THE BLUE FRENCH HORN. He does not always deserve to Get The Girl
 just because he wants the girl. Sometimes the girl gets to drink a neat scotch and pile into bed with her five dogs 
comfortable, happy, and alone. Robin, sometimes the girl gets herself.”

— ROBIN by Trista Mateer

We kept trying to have the talk, and then we realized we hate the talk.

What an absolute dork. Must be protected at all costs.

Quarantine mood is watching Netflix constantly until you start finding reference from one show in another.

For example, this happened to me today:

Me: *watching threat level midnight*

Michael: "my name is Michael Scarn and I'm here to say, I'm about to do the Scarn in a major way"

Me: *salutes* major way

And both can reference to sex

When people “nail” something, they did a great job. When they “screw” something, they ruined it.

Thor or rocket

#tag yourself i’m tony stark

Zoom meeting be like

Toxic by Britney spears

Dont be upsetti, have some spaghetti

Eurovision 2020 being cancelled moodboard

LOL

When you finally realise why Gen Z is named after the last letter of the Alphabet.

Yes, i too cant remeber how many times i was naked.

you’ve been naked more times than you can remeber

What the absolute fuck am i watching

IG: @babecabiita

Is this what bothers you the most about the damn rat?

ron: sure i'm gonna take my beloved rat into school with me, even though rats are not allowed and cats, the natural enemy of rats, are

This smile is going to end world hunger

BEN and REY in STAR WARS: THE RISE OF SKYWALKER

Wait i rewatched it (again) and she also said i love you to marcus!!!

Rosa Diaz said the words "I love you" to five people:

Her mom

Her dad

Her dying grandpa

Adrian Pimento

And Amy Santiago.

Actual siblings

No... Dont give me hope...

🌸Spring is coming🌼

Dude, seriously, we talked about you url

A dumb kid walks into an ice cream shop…

Kid: “I’ll have a scoop of vanilla and a scoop of chocolate please.”

Clerk: “Sorry kid, we’re out of chocolate.”

Kid: “OK. Make it a scoop of strawberry and a scoop of chocolate.”

Clerk: “No, no, you don’t understand, it’s chocolate we’re out of,”

Kid: “Ah, OK. Then gimme a scoop of raspberry, and a scoop of chocolate.”

Clerk: “Listen kid, can you spell the VAN in vanilla?”

Kid: “Sure! V-A-N.”

Clerk: “Can you spell the STRAW in strawberry?”

Kid: “Sure! S-T-R-A-W!

Clerk: “Can you spell the FUCK in chocolate?”

Kid: “There is no FUCK in chocolate!”

Clerk: “THAT’S what I’m trying to tell you.”

I just watched it and i was truly touched

Lol whats going on with calums hat im dead

5SOS on “No Shame” and “CALM” | Apple Music 2020

Lol for valentine's day the seniors had this thing where you pay them 3$ and they send a romantic poem of your choice to anyone you want so we sent one to our math teacher and she laughed so hard omg

Lol 12

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