Sometimes I Wish I Were A Crime Boss So I Could Party With Federal Agents

they call me jerry, the way i can

linked-in too

are you unemployed? has it been a while since youve thought about killing yourself? dont worry, indeed dot com can change one of those things

she brush on my Z till i’m textured

waking up at 7 am for my hour and a half commute to spiritual enlightenment :(((

slapping the chemo bag before i take a hit

just scrolled through old photos in my phone. brb gotta go puke.

bouta get intubated for Tube Tuesday

fucking this clown so hard that the flower on their lapel squirts

“What about ‘though shall not kill,’” I ask, cautiously reaching for my own firearm.

“You’re thinking of christianity,” the monk says. “And anyway, I know my god wouldn’t mind making an exception for a few Nazis.”

“Violence is never the answer,” the monk says, pumping a shotgun. “But you don’t always have to be right.”

beyblade backshots?