Thomas: Can you teach me… how to hoe?
Matthew: Rude
Matthew: [sips wine]
Matthew: but yes
Matthew: My life is like a romantic comedy
Matthew: Except there’s no romance. It’s just me laughing at my own jokes
Lucie: Ok, you need to start telling me why-
Grace: It’s better if I don’t tell you
Lucie: Better for who? Cause I’m not loving it. Friends, we tell each other things. There’s an exchange of information, leading to intimacy.
Grace:
Lucie: OK. Sometimes, when I’ve run out of toilet paper, I use sliced bread to clean myself. If I run out of that, I use slices of ham. It’s like a poor man’s wet wipe. I’m sharing that with you.
Grace, horrified: I really wish you hadn’t
*At the end of Chain of Gold*
Tatiana: THIS DEMON’S SPAWN BURNED MY HOUSE TO THE GROUND!
Lucie: What is HAPPENING?
Thomas: James’ getting served
Christopher: But I haven’t even ordered yet
Inquisitor Bridgestock: ORDER
Christopher: Uh, yeah, a Cheeseburger please!