Life Update - Blog Posts
Last life update this year.
-So... 2024 was an interesting year. I went in a exchange program in England. Made new friends. Finished a script for a project that has been laying in my head for three years. But I also joined Tumblr (properly).
-It was a good year, but.. for some reason I feel like I wasted it...
-I don't know why I feel this way, I just do. I feel like I wasted the entire year..
-Well
-I still got some minutes.
-I will make the most out of it.
Hope you did the same.
Happy new year!
-T19l8g
I Survived…
But the fight is never over
life update
top of the afternoon to you. i got some dr pepper, it’s so good. probably my favorite drink next to water (i don’t drink anything else really). i’m spending the day with my mom and we just got The Habit. i got a burger with lettuce and avocado on it. my mom and i talked for a bit, apparently my step brother is moving to texas after he graduates????? also, he never responded to my happy birthday text (W or L brother?).
mom is currently smoking a cig ok wait she just got into the car. okay. listening to working man by rush, about to go visit my sister and watch her do a tennis thing. pretty lit if i do say myself. i got some jorts on, a black long sleeve tee, black vans and black leg warmers. nobody knows im wearing blue hello kitty socks except for myself. and i guess people who read this… okay anyways!!
I need to out of this school.
There's nothing worth stressing over when there's only one month and a half left. These past few weeks I've been going nowhere, especially after getting a night shift job at Dollar Tree. "A job's a job, there's will be lazy ä$$hats galore so you gotta deal with it." But I'm sick of that motto. I'm sick of my dad saying this same degrading shït over and over again. I'm sick of these fūçkwåds at school being overdramatic anytime I walk past them cuz I got acne (aka ugly) and ig I stink now (yes. I'm self conscious abt that and figuring out how to stop it). And I physically, mentally, and emotionally can't deal with this. Say what u want. I can brush this crap off but for how long? It's draining and exhausting. Just like how ppl don't like me and can't deal me, I can't deal with them. But ig I'm the problem when I say that ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
23 April (life update)
So, keeping things honest I’m not doing the best right now friends. Over the course of the last 2 weeks one of my parents had a heart attack and the other is now on life support.
I really appreciate all of you who continue to support me and this study blog.
Morale of the story is that bad things happen to all of us, but it’s our actions after the fact that define us
Stay up ✌🏾
🎧 Trappin in paradise 78 - smooth sounds
Hiatus
As ssome of you guys might have noticed, I am not posting as frequently as I was (not that I'm posting that much anyways) but like exams are coming up and stress and self doubt are eating at me so like I'm a be gone to study my little poor Chinese heart out so my parents won't beat me to death /j
Until 4 October hehehehehe. I shall emerge again from the ashes. MY OWN ASHES
life update
over the past few weeks a lot has happened that I haven't talked about on here. to sum it up there's this man that's been stalking me since November and my college is doing next to nothing about it.
ive been to a fuck ton of meetings about it and I had one today where someone finally took me seriously about how this guy is not a student but instead a guy that's old enough to be my father. he knows where I live and just stands across the Road or paces by the door waiting.
its creepy as fuck and has left me feeling unsafe and like im being watched all the time. im terrified of walking by myself and im jumpy no matter what.
my friends are mostly being people that I can lean on but just today a close friend of mine has told be to not keep them updated and that they don't care. it might be an extreme reaction, but when things like this happen I block their number for a bit to give people space and to take a step back.
I want to continue being active on Tumblr but everything is getting to me and im honestly this close to deleting all of my socials and not talking to anyone on my campus. this on top of my eating disorder is not going well at all. im In a constant state of binging and then purging it all from worry and then I starve for 3 days and then I repeat the fucking cycle all while going to classes and meetings with the head of our campus security. it wasn't until today that I fully told my boyfriend what's been going on because I didn't want to admit that im being stalked as that would make it seem more real.
this on top of the state of the us is making me really debate why im still here. I might have stopped being super suicidal, but the urge to slit my wrists is coming back super strong. ive even started writing in my old journal about it while also drawing out how I have been feeling in it.
everything is getting to be too much for me and I want it all to end immediately. I NEED it to end before I end it all once and for all guys.
update found out that it wasn’t just breaking my fast that fucked up my stomach, but also the norovirus so that was a great experience.
I’m doing better now, however my sister accidentally caught it from me so now she’s sick. I took a little bit of a break from posting so that I could recover as all I could do was drink water, sleep, drink more water, vomit, drink even more water then sleep for 10 hours and sleep be exhausted when I get up.
I will say it was nice to sleep so much as I have reallllly bad insomnia and rarely get to sleep more than 2-3 hours. Most of the time I might be able to get 3 hours of sleep but it’s with periods of wakefulness. I feel like every 10 minutes of sleep I get I can’t sleep for 20-30 minutes, I’ve been off of melatonin for a while now just to give my body a break from it as in high school I was taking waay more then the recommended amount for someone of my height and weight.
Yall I broke my fast/ diet restriction and I regret it soo much. Not just because of my weight loss goals, but mainly because everything that I had( which wasn’t much) fucked with my stomach so badly
Bio update
guys I just realized that I never updated my account bio lol, I just fixed it. The only things fixed were my age (I’m 18 now woop!), and that I’m now a freshman in college!
Trying to currently get my housing for the next year squared away.
I have to do a bunch of stuff to show I don't have any income & that I can't afford monthly rent.
Each year.
It's what it is, now I'm scared because of trump & that my parents gave up & just started sending me money
Because of how much I have to buy for toiletries, basic shampoo & conditioner, laundry stuff, gas, washing & cleaning my dishes by hand, the floors...
Basically...snaps covers nothing, I run out every month for food (that's all it covers) & I can't get basics taken care of w/o them.
The random Amazon packages I have received so far:
One sticker for men & or women restrooms
One sticker of a puppy paw print
Today, a anal dildo.....
Am I to take this to me they want to be my toilet girl 🤔
Or that they are trying to f with me....
Don't like anal. So there's that, girls.