Come To Think Of It, In Lobster The Protagonist First Suffers From Loss Of A Partner And Then Suffers

another big boss apology wall of text under cut

idk i'm pretty sure that being a tool is a major theme in mgs overall. solid snake is created to be a tool and his story is about accepting or fighting it. the boss willingly was a tool, and while naked snake didn't accept being used to create clones or the boss making him kill her, i think he still existed within a social group with those values and it definitely influenced him. i think his refusal to accept the terrible children project and his pw arc where he ends up disapproving the boss, as well as what we see in mgs4, shapes him into the character who begins to question the system if values that deems it ok to treat people as tools, even though he still acts within it and ends up going along with it anyway (note the portable ops ending - idc if it's not canon - and how he ends up doing the same thing using the very same funds even). also i think that he was influenced in that regard by the boss and her words that the worst thing you can do for a comrade is to have personal feelings for them; note how he told amanda she should start treating chico as a soldier rather than as her brother.

i kind of thought he is more distant from his troops bc of seemingly spending time in acc instead of some kind of quarters on the rig, but mb he is more attached to his men than ishmael.

tbh i'm very biased bc if i were venom snake i would consider myself lucky, even though i understand the whole bereft of his own identity thing, and it is easy for me to imagine that despite conflicting feelings he would gladly accept his role. doing an important meaningful thing for the project that is my (and other people's) dream, and also (in a way that matters) becoming the person who i deeply admire and respect and mb even worship? i value my identity but would trade it (not without some sadness but with little to no hesitation) any day; to me the whole venom snake thing seems like a metaphor for a particular masculine dream/fantasy/expected behaviour tbh (not implying that all men want it or that only men can want it or that it's healthy): you discard some parts of yourself in order to shape yourself into a "cool guy" and do an "important meaningful thing"

Venom snake as a character tells a decent bit by proxy about big boss imo. You design him, give him your name, birthday. Venom was a completely different person and character before ttp. Considered one of John's best soilders within this cult of an operation.

Whats his thanks? Your thanks as the player? Becoming him. Memories replaced, face reconstructed, and made to stand in for him so he can achieve his greater plan. Becoming the biggest tool of them all. Being a proxy of him. An extension. An extension to him and his legend. Given a measely thanks over a tape. Then sent to die in his place.

All for some elusive greater good for soilders. A bigger picture you'll never get to see.

That is your reward.

Now some people argue that at the end, venom clearly is on board with it even after finding out the truth, yet I'd argue that even if he is, that's because of the cult like mentality of msf. Like yeah to any soilder on that base essentially becoming big boss and playing a big role in his plan would probably seem like a dream

Calling my gf “girlfriend” in the same cadence Solid Snake would say “colonel” is so fun

"spam like = blocked" if you spam like me i am going to cast 1000 protection spells on you so nothing bad happens to you ever

text and a silly doodle from yesterday below

i did line of action yesterday as well but didn't post.

i like the 10 minutes breakdancing guy (even although the shoulder is bad) and especially his pants; i mostly draw naked people bc it lets me see the anatomy better and yesterday while working on a small passion project it became obvious that i don't know what do pants look like lol. so this sketch was also my pants practice, in a way.

the longest sketch isn't much of upgrade from the 10 minute one, but that's ok i guess.

in a yt video there was an advice to do both practice and passion projects. i'd like to redraw one post i've seen here, which requires to practice faces, poses from imagination (or reference) and drawing specific characters. the first character i decided to draw is kazuhira miller from mgsv, and i was anxious bc i care about that character and would like to do him justice and draw him good. i opened a reference - the concept arts (full body and face) and the 3d model - and tried drawing the same things for now. i still have noticeable skill issue just drawing people (and faces especially), so even copying the exact same thing wasn't perfect, but i kinda like how the small doodle of his head (the one in the middle) came out and am posting ot below just as a small celebration. after this exercise i understood that i should as well practice drawing clothes and shoes (and mb guns if i will decide to be thorough). overall it went better than i expected.

You guys want to play a game? REBLOG and put in the tags why you follow this person

i tried to go to femboy hooters but it was just this guy there and he'd only talk about the horrors of war has this happened to anyone else

few days ago tried to draw, let's say, "a man of japanese heritage" to get better at drawing miller. ended up white washing him beyond recognition, lmao. will probably try again later

yesterday's line of action

was searching stuff about saddam hussein on youtube and noticed that many videos are styled similar to the true crime videos my lady (and feminine presenting) friends enjoy.

f/m date idea: watching videos about war criminals together