Latest Posts by tiredbirdnerd - Page 9

tarot decks are fun in the same way that rolling a dice to determine a result is fun, except the dice has 78 sides and occasionally criticizes your life choices

It's that time of year when there is perpetually dirt under my fingernails despite me washing my hands a million times a day

"I killed another houseplant bc of executive dysfunction"

Mundane

Evokes helplessness

Kind of a bummer

"Plagued by demons as I am, my crops have withered yet again"

Powerful imagery

Frames you as a gothic protagonist

Emphasizes that you are hounded by demons

How fucking cool are demons???

the Grinch and Shrek bonding over their mutual appreciation for onions and being green

*me @ the demon under my bed* scoot over i wanna cuddle 

cicadas SLEEP for 17 YEARS and then SCREAM & EAT & FUCK for 5 WEEKS and then DIE and people somehow think humans are the smartest species

Assert dominance over ghosts by jumping out at yourself from dark corners

reblog this and you will hear great news

the idea to make this video came to me while i was driving to school and i couldnt stop thinking about it so here it is

this video saved my life

*friends car is locked*

Friend: stop pulling the handle

Me:

i know some naughty words that will really knock your socks off

Kids these days are such wimps 

Jimin: OK guys, how do I ask someone out?

Seokjin: Roses are red, violets are blue, guess what, my bed has room for two

Jimin: OH MY GOD NO

Hoseok: Twinkle twinkle little star, we can do it in a car

Jimin: STOP IT

Taehyung: Row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream, merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, I can make you scream

Yoongi: I feel like that’s verging dangerously close into serial killer territory

Hey do u know that one song that’s in every trailer that goes “FOR YOUUUU, FOR YOOUUU, OOO OOO OOOO O O OOO OO OO OOOOOO” ?????

Yeah that’s song is the embodiment mass extinction