matt-w-blogging

Latest Posts by matt-w-blogging

I miss when people would throw candy at me from parades; I'm far too old now, I get passed by.

To clarify, I am not asking for solutions, or getting upset at parade participants for not throwing candy at me. I am simply saying that I miss it.

Walked into the bathroom and immediately went "it smells like Arctic Fox in here" like the world's gayest bloodhound

Also (because I'm currently rewatching it):

- Old gay people. A-bit-past-middle-aged men that are a normal couple (well, as normal as a couple gets in this show) and also gay.

- The idea of "What if everyone was assigned a prophecy when they were born?" is explored

- Sprinkled with references to myths that you feel very proud if you understand

- Drama, murder, mystery, love, epic quests, betrayal, and more

- Family blood ties are less significant than your ties with those you choose to tie yourself to (chosen family > biological family, but someone can be both your chosen and biological family)

- The Amazons are in it (and much like the rest of the characters, they don't all look like tall, hot supermodels; they look like normal people, of which some are tall, hot supermodels)

- Yes, it does end on a cliffhanger, due to the fact that there was supposed to be a second season, but I personally think it is entirely worth watching regardless

- So much more that I can't say without spoiling parts

But do be aware that as a show involving Greek mythology, it does get bloody— someone else recommended checking Does The Dog Die? (doesthedogdie.com) if you have specific triggers you wish to avoid. I support this, though know that there will obviously be spoilers.

Why you should watch KAOS (2024) on Neftlix:

- Jeff Goldblum as Zeus

- A disabled actors play a disabled characters (Mat Fraser & another secret one [because spoilers])

- A trans actor plays a trans character (I won't say which one since it's kind of a spoiler)

- Set in modern times, uses characters from old myths but isn't a simple retelling; it's a whole new story

- All your favs are there (Prometheus, Daedalus, Persephone, Dionysus, Cassandra, Medusa, Charon, Ariadne, the Fates, the Furies, just to name a few)

- Speaking of Persephone, she and Hades are actually in love (the version of the myth which I know much of you love)

- Gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss Hera (as in, she literally does all those things)

- The gods' actors' ages actually make sense, they didn't cast solely young people or make young people look older; you've got Zeus (72), Hera (63), Hades (61), Persephone (56), Poseidon (56), Dionysus (27), you get the idea

- Killer soundtrack

- Actual realistic queer characters/representation in a natural, unforced way

- Enjoyable story and comedic but also has depth (I binge-watched it in a day)

- Not a huge commitment (8 episodes of about 50 minutes each)

- Have you ever thought "What would the Ancient Greek gods be doing in modern times?" This show answers that question!

- It wasn't renewed for a second season due to viewership, so if the views explode, maybe they'll renew it and I can find out what happens next (I know it's not likely, but I can dream; besides, if just one person watches and enjoys it, then this post will have been worth it)

I had a Thought about DreamSMP characters (yes it's over now but I still think about it sometimes)

Alternative text:

A graph with an X and Y axis. The left X axis says "You know what they are", the right X axis says "You have no idea what the fuck they are", the upper Y axis says "They explain what they are", the lower Y axis says "They never explain what they are".

Quadrant 2, with "They explain what they are" and "You know what they are", says "Charlie: A slime that gooped its way to the surface over a long period of time."

Quadrant 1, with "They explain what they are" and "You have no idea what the fuck they are", says "Tommy: Lab experiment???"

Quadrant 3, with "They never explain what they are" and "You know what they are", says "Techno: Some sort of pigman."

Quadrant 4, with "They never explain what they are" and "You have no idea what the fuck they are", says "Phil: Had a (human?) child with a Samsung Smart Fridge, might have wings?, wife might be the Goddess of Death??"

Why you should watch KAOS (2024) on Neftlix:

- Jeff Goldblum as Zeus

- A disabled actors play a disabled characters (Mat Fraser & another secret one [because spoilers])

- A trans actor plays a trans character (I won't say which one since it's kind of a spoiler)

- Set in modern times, uses characters from old myths but isn't a simple retelling; it's a whole new story

- All your favs are there (Prometheus, Daedalus, Persephone, Dionysus, Cassandra, Medusa, Charon, Ariadne, the Fates, the Furies, just to name a few)

- Speaking of Persephone, she and Hades are actually in love (the version of the myth which I know much of you love)

- Gaslight, gatekeep, girlboss Hera (as in, she literally does all those things)

- The gods' actors' ages actually make sense, they didn't cast solely young people or make young people look older; you've got Zeus (72), Hera (63), Hades (61), Persephone (56), Poseidon (56), Dionysus (27), you get the idea

- Killer soundtrack

- Actual realistic queer characters/representation in a natural, unforced way

- Enjoyable story and comedic but also has depth (I binge-watched it in a day)

- Not a huge commitment (8 episodes of about 50 minutes each)

- Have you ever thought "What would the Ancient Greek gods be doing in modern times?" This show answers that question!

- It wasn't renewed for a second season due to viewership, so if the views explode, maybe they'll renew it and I can find out what happens next (I know it's not likely, but I can dream; besides, if just one person watches and enjoys it, then this post will have been worth it)

Sometimes I fuck myself up thinking about how on the DSMP Technoblade became Ranboo's sensei, and then became (jokingly) distraught because the sensei always dies, and how in real life Ranboo wears the crown because viewers said they sounded like Techno and they said "if the crown fits, wear it" and then the two became friends, with Techno being an experienced streamer/youtuber and Ranboo being extremely new

And then, y'know

The sensei always dies

The character arc contained between "when God sends me to hell, I want him to hesitate" and "I have ascended to heaven to take on the Kingdom of God"... magnifique...

Why is it that it's totally acceptable to say "oh sorry, I'm not a morning person" but when I say "oh sorry, I'm not a night person" it's all "aww okay" and "goodnight!" and "we'll miss you!" and "sleep well <3"

For a moment, I forgot what a gaylord was and was in a world of wild confusion and homosexual human trafficking

Just discovered that I say "I love you~" in a very specific voice to my cats so often that they respond to it like it's their name. Here's how I found out:

Me: Good morning kitties <3

Cats: *mostly uninterested*

Me: I love you~

Cats: *both looking at me with attentive eyes, as if I've said their names*

Me:

Breaking News: World-Class Soft Pretzel Maker Invents New Solution To Dip Pretzels In Before Baking

The baker is quoted as saying the usual baking-soda-and-water method was "too basic for [their] taste"

What would you even call the act of being an imposter? Imposting? Impostering? Imposticizing? Impostercizing?

When I was like eight years old I overheard my mother and aunt talking about how apparently if you don't learn to wiggle your ears as a kid, you'll never be able to, and that they wished they could wiggle their ears

And little 8-year-old me went "oh man, I better learn to wiggle my ears now so I don't regret it later!"

Anyway I can now and I have never once gone "boy, good thing I can wiggle my ears"

Just finally put together that the thing Ken from the Barbie movie reminds me of that I couldn't put my finger on for the longest time is Rocky from Rocky Horror

My skin is so crispy I wouldn't be surprised if I just shedded it like a snake at this point

Another brilliant twist ending, clearly I still have much to learn !

I got very sleepy all of the sudden I am seconds away from falling asleep I'm typing this post with the last of my energy please remember me please make the world a better place, you're lo

Now, I'm no expert by any means, but I've been following Fish long enough that I can say with a fair amount of confidence that this post was going to end with something along the lines of:

"you're loved, and dehydrated, those aren't related but please drink water"

I got very sleepy all of the sudden I am seconds away from falling asleep I'm typing this post with the last of my energy please remember me please make the world a better place, you're lo

candy. cane. not peppermint. candy cane.

When I was a kid I got the most DELIGHTFUL candy-cane scented candle, one of those giant round mfers, and I told my mom (as a child does) that we should get two in case we can't find it again, and she said 'nah, it's a candy cane scented candle, how hard could it be to find' (a reasonable thought)

Anyway to this day we have never found it again. No other candy cane candle that I've found measures up.

Vanilla and lemon also slap though

And if I could find a cinnamon/anise/clove/nutmeg candle I think I would cry from its beauty

Anyway I'll tag @valiantperfectiontragedy & anyone who wants to join in

(If anyone thinks they might know the candy cane candle, it was a big pillar candle with one wick, and it was white but it had a thick wax coating around the outside that was striped with white, red, and green (I think? maybe not green, it's been a really long time), and I have no idea what store we got it at, please let me know if you have any information leading to my finding of this candle)

whats ur favorite candle scent 🕯️

i love vanilla flavor candles

🤍🤍🤍yess

tag game? (no pressure) : @chroniic-pessimistt @xiniceratops @bored-boring-and-tired @rayslove-forlister @sleepy-vix

Head & Shoulders comes out with a new product line, called Shoulders. The packaging is sleek and black, distinctly different from their easily recognizable signature white & blue style. Something for adults who get mocked by their peers for using Head & Shoulders. The tagline is: So No Head?

Logan, needing to decide something: Hey, do you have a quarter or something I can flip?

Roman, checking pockets: Hm... I have D&D dice, if that would work?

Logan:

Logan: Wh—

Logan:

Logan, giving up wondering: Yeah that works. Thanks.

Just realized that Copacabana (the song by Barry Manilow) never says Tony's dead.

It says,

There was blood and a single gunshot,

But just who shot who?

&

She lost her love

&

She lost her youth and she lost her Tony

But it never says that it's Rico who shot Tony.

What if she "lost her love" because Tony's in prison for life for second-degree murder?

I see your "character with rose-colored glasses so all red flags just look like flags," and I raise you:

Character with rose-colored glasses so all flags look like red flags

requested by matt-w-blogging

THANK YOU!!

requested by matt-w-blogging

haha yessss thank you

requested by matt-w-blogging

Imagine if spells could be cast to inflict you with any symptom, not just those of physical illnesses

Like, screw 'coughing fit' or 'fainting spell,' give me

Hocus pocus, leaping locust,

I cast curse of hyperfocus!

Or

Tic tac, bric-a-brac,

I hex thee: Panic attack!

And now, a new one

Heart broke: Good Omens isn't a romance because while Crowley has been in love with Aziraphale for 6000 years, Aziraphale is either too oblivious or scared to see what's right in front of him and pushes Crowley away

Broke: Good Omens isn't a gay love story because Crowley and Aziraphale aren't in love

Woke: Good Omens is a gay love story because Crowley and Aziraphale are in love

Bespoke: Whether Good Omens is a gay love story or not is debatable; it is, however, undeniably a story of the love between Crowley and Aziraphale (whatever type of love that may be)

Neil Gaiman: Good Omens isn't a gay love story because while Crowley and Aziraphale are in love, they are not human males, they are an angel and a demon

You've heard of Spiderman: Homecoming, Spiderman: Far From Home, and Spiderman: No Way Home, but may I introduce you to:

Spiderman: Please Just Let Me Go Home

A movie in which Peter Parker keeps finding himself with task after task after chore after chore after errand after errand to do while he keeps trying to escape and go home so he can watch tv in his pajamas

[Patton and Emile meet]

Patton: Oh, hi, kiddo! The fans have told me so much about you, about how we'd get along super well—

Emile, whipping out a notepad: So, tell me about your need to always have the answer and inability to say that you don't know for fear of disappointing the others. When did that start?

Patton, tears already streaming down his face: What.

Patton, when Janus and Roman are fighting: Well, I guess we'll just have to look for proof to see who's not being truthful!

Janus, studying his gloves: Go ahead, search my room; I have nothing to hide.

Roman, indignant: Oh, and I do?!

Janus: Uh, did I say anything about you, stupid bitch?

Roman: ...

Janus, scoffing: Egocentric much?