Logan, Needing To Decide Something: Hey, Do You Have A Quarter Or Something I Can Flip?

People really out here saying 'women can't be superheros (or in positions of power at all) because they're too emotional' and ignoring that Captain America: Civil War is all about two grown men starting a fight and splitting their team in two because they couldn't talk it out like civilized adults

Me, baking anything: For Patton

Me, taking my meds and drinking water: For Janus

Me, making art and writing creatively: For Roman

Me, removing myself from stressful situations and listening to music: For Virgil

Me, reading and learning about new things: For Logan

Me, sharing random and strange facts with my loved ones as a sign of affection: For Remus

Me, managing to be a functioning person: For Thomas

Remus thinks this is the funniest thing and keeps trying to wear revealing clothes to hear Logan say it again but nothing

Then one day he gives up and is wearing normal clothes

Logan, still straight-faced: Prude.

Remus:

Patton: (unbuttons polo one button more than usual because it's hot out)

Logan, completely straight-faced: Whore.

Patton:

Patton: (unbuttons the next button just to see what will happen)

Screw it, have some famILY

Patton: *yawn, opens eyes*

On Patton's bedside table: HUGE SPIDER

Patton: *shrieks, jumps out of bed, runs out of room*

Patton: Virgil! Virgil there's a giant bug in my room I need you to kill it!

Virgil: *gets up, follows Patton to his room*

Virgil: *kills bug*

Virgil: That was a big spider

Patton: Yeah I woke up and it was right in my face and I yelled... Well, I'm definitely awake now

Virgil: *laugh*

Patton: Thank you!!

Just kicked my brother's ass in Wii sports boxing, which was funny because my Mii is Patton, so new headcanon: Patton is super good at boxing but just hasn't mentioned it to the other sides until somehow Roman ropes him in to boxing with him and Patton just knocks him tf out

Janus, black veil attached to his bowler hat: This is so sad. I'll miss my husband so much.

Virgil: There's still blood on your hands. You obviously killed him.

Janus: So incredibly sad that my wealthy husband has died.

Virgil: You— This is so suspicious. How does nobody else find this incredibly suspicious?

Patton, hugging Janus: Shhh. He's grieving.

Logan, patting Janus's back: Shhh. He's single.

Roman: *enters kitchen to see Janus sitting at the counter, face in his hands, Patton sitting beside him, rubbing his back, and Logan standing awkwardly in the corner*

Roman: Um... What?

Janus: *sniffling*

Roman: Is he crying?

Logan: Yes.

Roman: ...Why?

Logan: Patton convinced him to watch 'My Neighbor Totoro' with him. He...

Janus, through sobs: I thought it was going to be a cute story about a big fluffy rabbit-bear and it ripped out my heartstrings and used them to string a lute and then played it right in front of me!

Patton: *comforting intensifies*

Logan: That.

Roman: Right... I'm gonna go.

Logan: Take me with you.

Y'all wish me luck on Patton's glasses, I got black embroidery thread for this but I can't do round embroidering—

A littol Virgil! (Does this count as fanart?)

Based off the Campfire Au Vee by @tscampfireau (HIGHLY recommend you check it out, it's awesome!)

Everyone reblogging this with some variation of 'poly pat' is so intensely valid

Good morning! I'd just like to point out:

[Patton]: First, we'll need someone to practice on...

[Logan]: But who?

[Patton]: Each other?

(After they all swear to tell the truth during the trial scene and Janus takes the bibles/misc objects back away)

[Patton]: Okay, so, we kiss now? Or...?

Bonus:

[Patton]: Aww, there's so much cool stuff they've done for us online, kiddos!

[Roman]: Oh yeah?

[Patton]: There's some really neato artwork of us all AND some writing as well! Say, what is a "ship"?

[Logan]: Seriously, Morality, you don't know what that is? It is a craft designed for water travel.

[Virgil]: Even Prince knew that.

[Roman]: Yeah, even I knew that.

[Patton]: Oh, ok! It does not look like that, but ok.

I just want to point out those all happened in canon. That is all.

Has there ever been a bigger power move than Thomas pointing out immediately that Roman's sword is a katana before sword buffs called him out on it in the comments