Omfg I Forgot To Take My Fitbit Off Before Going On Tbe Swings And Now It Thinks I’ve Done 12,000 Steps

Currently have consumed roughly 400 cals today and my god are the binge urges killing me, I’ve also only took 10,000 steps so I am not in a negative net sadly.

Gonna take like 10+ lax then try and just go to sleep early, hopefully tomorrow will be a much more productive day !!

Ive lost all my thoughts

Broke my fast even though I wasn’t hungry, gave up 2 seconds into my workout and found out that due to binging and being a lazy fuck like I am tonight losertown estimates I’ll be at my ugw on the 10th of July, a whole month later than I had planned to reach it.

I want to die, I am constantly miserable and everyday I get closer and closer to genuinely just killing myself because I can’t take this. I hate my body and I hate my mind, I hate myself.

I just finished having the worst binge episode of my life. I’ve gone from 51.9kg to 56kg in the span of 2 days, consumed more than 10,000 calories, 3k at least in the past hour.

It was so disgusting, I sat on the floor shoving food down my throat, throwing up then continuing eating. It spilled everywhere, ice cream all though my carpet, all through my clothes. I tried to purge it out but nothig came up but drool. I sat in that, the drool, leftover throw up and food for what felt like 30 minutes. My stomach hurts, it looks disgusting and I’ve lost my thigh gap.

I was 2 weeks binge free, and now I’ve gone and messed it all up. I don’t even know what to do. My only plan is to take all my laxatives, walk until my legs give out, and cut myself.

I’m never eating again.

I’m taking a break from laxatives starting tonight and I’m so anxious because they’ve been my lifeline but I gotta do what I gotta do 😔

I miss having energy I miss having a life but Im worried that even if I recover life will still feel meaningless and I’ll just end up fat doing absolutely nothing. Like my only goal in life right now is to lose weight, it feels like I will have nothing if I stop restricting.

I can’t wait for the day I don’t have a muffin top while wearing my favourite jeans

I don’t want to go to work I just wanna sleeep ☹️☹️

Gonna stick to my plan today and if I make it to 50kg by tomorrow I shall celebrate with a hot cross bun and milk ^^

Feeling very fat and fake today, it’s 1pm and I’ve only taken 3,500 steps today when I would usually be at least at 6000 by now. I’ve had an energy drink and I look so bloated. I’m not good enough, not sick enough, and all I want to do is cry and fast but I have fucking work.