Tan Lines Or No???

Maybe a little

I stay in pain all of the time. I was beginning to think that it was in my head until I find out I have some semi serious issues going on, and if I don’t make some changes now, with in 4 years maybe 5 years I’ll be in a wheelchair and that is worse than I could imagine… even though I’ve got proof of this my on and off again husband acts like There’s nothing wrong with me. No matter how I talk to him or try and confide in him, he just acts like I’m faking, or that it’s not that serious. I don’t get it. I mean I would understand if I thought he was worried or concerned at all, but he goes on about life getting to be a little more of an asshole daily. It’s like after he’s been an asshole for a couple days. After he slept on the couch periodically through the week. Then he wakes up one morning and wants to go shopping and do something together. Which I don’t normally I would love. But, it’s really hard to act like everything is OK when it’s been like this. I’m not a light switch. I tried to talk to him I’m trying to explain things how I feel be open. But it’s like he doesn’t even hear me. So I wouldn’t want to go be around him when he makes me feel stupid for asking questions or for not understanding something when all of it comes from the issues that I’m having it’s not my fault I would never make him feel stupid about anything I don’t get people. Especially not him. I Feel like if he wants to stick this out with me and work through this with me. And things would be totally different. I refuse to continue to cause conflict between us for something that I have no control over, this is all too much! But what do I expect when I ever need him the most he’s never been there.

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How am I ever gonna be just your friend?

Haven’t posted in a while, my life is so hectic right now. And I saw him today, 6 months of nothing then outta the blue he messaged me, I think we have a bond because we both got hurt around the same time and we held one another together. I don’t fully understand why it went the way it did….. I’m just glad to have you back in my life….. maybe we can help one another again!!!

I waisted so much time with him. He’s so ugly to me all the time. I’ve told him over and over to just tell me if this is over and then we can maybe one day be friends… I am hurt so bad, and he could care less! I want to let go.

Toughen up buttercup... I remind myself of this from time to time!

I think I’m over it! Not seeing him definitely helped. I feel a lot better. I feel like I’m kinda free. Not that he held me down because I made my own choices. I accept that. Fake is what it is, FAKE! I kept it 100! So my conscience is clear. I’m probably never gonna be more than a friend with benefits anyone else. He was my last hope as far as relationships go. I look back at what it was about him that I really missed and tbh, all of our time was spent with me trying to build him up and me working on his self esteem. I guess it worked. Mission accomplished! Time to move on anyways!!!

If you love her, show her don’t tell her, actions speak so much louder, if she complains when you’re home late, when she is ill with you when you make plans and don’t include her until you make sure it’s ok with ever one else. She is yours she loves you. She needs to know this back, not by words or assumptions. Put her on a pedi stool and see what all she does for you.... just an idea...