6/29/19

anyone else ever daydream for 6 hours straight and then after ur just like nah let’s scrap that and do it all again but slightly to the left

I hate when I get told this. Especially by my own mother, who knows I’m sick. And has the same thing because fuck genetics sometimes right? So..Its like...I have a chronic disorder??? My own existence is an exhausting painful battle???? You should know this as well as anyone??? Smdh

Conversations with abled people I'm sick of

Me, chronically ill: Gosh, I’m so exhausted.

Abled person: YOU’RE tired????? *I* worked all day!

i’m not gonna kill myself because if my depression wants me dead THAT badly it’s gonna have to start shutting my fucking organs down like a REAL disease instead of being a fucking pussy and hiding in my brain and trying to get ME to do it’s dirty work for it !

When you’re in the middle of feeling every emotion then suddenly you just…don’t feel at all anymore.

I only want human contact from the person I’m attached to…other than that I’d rather be alone.

Suicide attempt or just a fuck up?

Who knows.

“You walk at home? Do you even need your wheelchair?”

Yes, because walking in my own house is different than walking class to class at school. I don’t carry a heavy backpack at home. I’m not on a tight schedule at home. I can sit on the ground at home. I can ask my parents or siblings to help me at home. I can crawl on my hands and knees at home. I can lie in the middle of the hallway at home. I can sit on counters and tables at home. I can bear a lot of pain at home. I can show that pain at home. I can collapse in the middle of crawling up the staircase at home.

Don’t tell me or anyone else where or when they need to use their mobility device