Whenever I'm Depressed Dogs Hate Me And My Vibes. They Hate Me And Won't Stop Barking, Which Honestly

Drinking Piggly Wiggly water of unknown origin is like playing Russian Roulette. You can get pool water, water that was sitting outside to long on field day on the last day of school, Satan's toilet water, normal but slightly to the left, normal to the right, westbend, and slightly better than Dasani.

Don't let people pressure you into buying more spoons than you need.

The master bedroom of my condo doesn't even have a cuck chair. where am i supposed to eat my appy slices and peanutbutter?? on the bed?? I do that at home. I'm on vacation. i deserve to have a cuck chair. I have a chair i my room at home but it is a chairdrobe. I put all my close on that before I get around to putting them away. to have a useless chair is a simple luxury. sure I intended to blasphize the cuck chair by denying it's horny purposes, but so what i want to relax and have a nice diner of appie slices with more peanut butter than apple and microwave popcorn.

eating water activated tape straight from the tape despenser like its fruit by the foot

"good squash is softer than a child's skull"

-my dad

Thought the Mountain Dew soda streamer was Mountain Dew scented dryer breads.

does the meth affect the taste of the gator

tummy grumbles have me hauling ass across the store white knuckling the cart, hoping I don't shit myself

See these hands. They've been in so many armpits.

had to go elbow deep in the couchussy to get the remote