Chosen: I Spy With My Little Eye Someone Who Needs To Shut The Fuck Up.

Dark: Love is a weakness, an evolutionary mistake.

Second: You're literally making a Valentine's Day card for Chosen right now.

Dark: *pointing a glue gun at him* you're on fucking thin ice kid.

Dark: sSSSHIT- I BURNT MY LIP-

Chosen: ...Why the fuck would you even drink coffee with a METAL STRAW in the FIRST PLACE??

Dark: BECAUSE WE WERE OUT OF THE PLASTIC ONES!

Chosen: ...I'm pretty sure that place is fire-proof, or something.

Dark, grenade in hand: Alright, but is it explosion-proof?

Green: "It's easy to forget what a sin is in the middle of a battlefield."

Yellow: Opposite over hypotenuse.

Green: Dipshit.

Navy, holding a new born Purple: He's beautiful...

The Doctor: We're gonna have to give him some shots.

Navy: Oh hell yeah, pour up. It's his fucking birthday.

Dark: I am working on this whole Good Guy thing, but anyone who cuts me in line at Starbucks deserves to have their kneecaps shot out, okay?

Dark: Why won’t you all just lie down and die with dignity?!

Red: We don’t do anything with dignity!

Dark, looking at their watch: It has been 2 hours and sixteen minutes since I’ve insulted someone.

Dark: It’s been about 5 seconds since I’ve assaulted someone, but let’s not talk about that.

Second in the back of Dark's car: MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS! MCDONALDS!

Chosen: We have food at home.

Dark: *pulls into the McDonald's drivethrough*

Second: YAYYYYYY!

Dark: *orders one black coffee and leaves*

*gang is chilling in the house*

*knocking at the door*

Second: Was Purple supposed to come over today?

Green: I don't think so-

*loud boom*

Dark, walking through where the door just was: We're here!

Second: Oh, hi Dark! Hi Chosen and Vic!

Yellow: What happened to the door?

Dark: APRIL FOOLS!

Yellow: BURNING DOWN THE DOOR IS NOT AN APRIL FOOLS JOKE?!

Dark: Technically, the door exploded, much quicker and more efficient.

*later*

Dark: Well, bye you little suckers!

Second: Bye Dark! Sorry the others couldn't see you off

Dark: Nah, it's okay. Come on Chosen, come one Vic let's head out

Second, already ducking behind the couch: NOW GUYS!

Red, Yellow, Green, and Blue: GLITTER ATTACK!

Dark: Wha-

*glitter bombs are thrown*

*The Dark Lord is now covered in glitter*

Chosen, patting Dark on the back: Happy April Fools Day