Twice this week my neurologist has canceled appointments. Almost had a meltdown right there in the waiting room..they could at least tell me before I got there! I take the bus, so I lost 4$ in bus fare. Needless to say it upsets me and my schedule. I didn't meltdown, way to go me!
"Ghosts don't haunt us. That's not how it works. They're present among us because we won't let go of them. "I don't believe in ghosts," I said, faintly. "Some people can't see the color red. That doesn't mean it isn't there," she replied."
-Sue Grafton
Depression has swaddled me, it's the perfect time for my "dear friend " to be judgemental and essentially told me to shut up about my autism. Oh I will shut up alright....
Trying desperately to lose weight! I miss being skinny so much I meltdown. I'm tired of wearing such a big size, I miss wearing my size 2 clothes. It has me so depressed.
I guess the pain will end when I end.... just let it end. I'm horrible and worthless, a waste of natural resources. Maybe surgery Monday will not go well.
Allfather, call me home please! I am unworthy of life! 😢🤐💔
I'm just going to sleep as much as I can so I won't be a bother to anyone.
Odin, may I have peace and no longer ruin people? I have no strength left, let those who know me that I will not be a burden.
The problem with a mental illness is you can be fine for a while. just completely and totally functional like a normal person. then for no reason whatsoever you feel that overwhelming feeling of hopelessness, sadness, or worry. and it feels like you’re just back to square one. the sudden feeling that you don’t matter always comes back. the worst part is you can never explain to someone why, it’s just how your mind works.
IG: ousíapoeticaok
Not sure which is most abhorrent!
Having bad ticks and problems talking
Or
Going to see a doctor that has a rotten bedside manner,to put it mildly.
Hopefully I don't meltdown..
I feel called out.