Join The Cognito Hazard

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Diary of an Awkward trans-girl : Day 23 —What the hell is HDG?

Dear Diary,

Okay, so I have this ridiculously adorable trans friend— @sapphothecutewitch who is the kind of cute chaos that makes your gay little soul panic just a bit. She’s a total menace in the most affectionate, gremlin-coded way possible. She’s been trying to get me into this fandom called HDG. I still don’t even really know what it is—some kind of anime or visual novel or fever dream of queer feelings and unhinged energy? But every time she brings it up, it’s with that little sparkle in her eye like she knows something I don’t.

She swears I’d love it. Says it’s got “everything a soft little weirdo like you would love.” Which, rude… but also maybe true?

And the worst part is—I trust her taste. That’s the dangerous bit. Like, I know if I let her show me even one character or plotline, it’s over. I’ll spiral. I’ll fall. She’ll smirk. I’ll be in too deep and she’ll get to say “I told you so,” probably while teasing me with a knowing look.

As a trans girl who’s already got a tendency for obsessive little hyperfixations and emotionally intense friendships that maybe toe the line a little (okay, a lot)… this could be my downfall. And honestly? That’s starting to sound kind of appealing.

Maybe I want to be pulled into a new fandom by a girl who giggles a little too hard. Maybe I want to watch her ramble about her favorite characters while I try (and fail) to understand her. Maybe I want something silly and passionate and weird I can chat with to someone like me.