Tw Restriction - Blog Posts

Let me just say that what this post says is everything. I'm living it. My fiancée is a "cook", food is his hobby and "flavor is everything" and he "won't go without flavor". He eats so badly; like everything you could imagine that you would think that someone shouldn't eat, he does. Fatty, fried, eating out, full of real cream and real butter and a whole heck of a lot of it. He drinks full fat milk by the gallon. He insists on a "sweet treat" after dinner. Bowls of cake with milk in it eaten like cereal. Pastries and cookies and pie every. single. day. on top of the rich food he cooks. Obviously he is overweight (not like....unable to move and function, but you know). He doesn't care. He literally has said that you cannot learn anything about a culture unless you eat their food. He wants to travel and do street vendors in different places. He wants to competitively eat. His existence is literally all about food.

Now, I'm one of those unfortunate people that have ED and never get thin. That's another rant. I keep telling him that I do not want to eat this food, it is too damn spicy or rich or whatever. I'm lactose intolerant (for really real), I have immune disorders that require me to take medication akin to a chemotherapeutic drug. I get sick easily. It literally is so beyond what my body can even tolerate that it's ridiculous. He says I'm unhealthy and need the things he cooks

See, the thing is....he has colitis and costochondritis. Basically everything he likes to eat is what he would call "bland" and he flat refuses to eat properly. He is literally ready to live and fall on that freaking hill of food. It makes me so freaking mad I want to scream because when he has flare ups he wants sympathy. I'm so sorry but I do feel bad that he feels bad; but when it comes to him wanting me to baby him I just can't. It feels like he does have an addiction and I'm helping him in this weird cycle of self destruction.

I don't want to be a part of that. And I feel like crap for it.

We really have to start facing food as a drug. We need to recover from it. We dream with food, but it is bad for us. We should start treating ourselves as we are addicts in recover, because that is what we are. Some people even think about food 24/7. Food makes us high for a few minutes, but then we really feel like shit afterwards. What is the point? We feel like we can not live without a burger, or a pizza, or a good greasy food, but we absolutely can. Food is one of the worst drugs ever. Don’t let it take you to your downfall.

How is everyone today? I hope you're all having a decent day.

Some day I will have moots that are like me that are old and still fucking fighting every damn day.

REBLOG IF YOU'RE AN ACTIVE ÃNÅ ACCOUNT THIS MONTH I NEED MORE ACTIVE MUTUALS!!

Currently thinking of all the money I’m going to save by eating less. No doordash, no expensive groceries, just only what I need so I can’t pig out. All that extra money… what am I going to do with it?

I have a very exciting new discovery! Dance workouts! It might seem silly but they're actually making working out and burning calories fun and less torturous. I can burn 200 calories in less than an hour. They work much better than jogging in place. So very proud of that one, although... I did go over my 500 kcal limit today by a landslide, but I burned off all the excess!

P.S. Do you guys have any tips for any upcoming events? I have a party coming up tomorrow and a celebration the next day and I have not prepared at all. Should I try to adjust my kcals or just not focus on the food at all/avoid them?

updated my goals and dates because after i hit the pre-travel goal and went overseas, i completely fucked my routines up again. oh to be able to consume 2k calories a day and still lose weight because i'm walking and doing so much...

new date goal is my birthday. gotta hit it.

i used to think getting close to my goal weight would be a motivator, but man, the closer i get, the more i'm like 'wow! i'm so close! maybe i can relax a little today' and screw my progress over.

if i want to be within reach of my gw3 by halloween, i gotta go extra hard now TT

genuinely didn't think a plateau would happen to me. calories? in check. exercise? every day. plateau? couldn't be me.

and yet.

here we are.

so many of the reddit forums recommend eating at maintenance for a while and it makes me sick to even think about trying, so we're going to weigh and count everything obsessively again, not just the big/non-vegetable things, and lower the max daily calories to 800. i know that's actually a pretty high number for edblr, but 1000 had been working for me for so long…

wish me luck! almost excited to feel the pains again.