Heinz Doofenshmirtz - Blog Posts
Apparently Target is rethinking being anti DEI because foot traffic in their stores has been declining for like 10 weeks straight and their stock has been dropping in unison and listen, I know a lot of this is probably because consumer spending goes down in general when the economy is unstable (tarrifs, mass federal gov layoffs etc.) but I think we should just keep running boycotts of different brands to convince them that they only make money when they're woke. I know we dunked on rainbow capitalism because it was cornball and performative but I don't even give a shit. These companies shouldn't be able to be openly pro-Trump and expect us to ignore it. They should not be allowed to bend the knee to racist, xenophobic, homophobic, transphobic, abelist, generally bigoted culture war bullshit without taking a hit to their bottom line. These billionaire dipshits wanted unfettered capitalism with a madman at the helm and they should not be allowed to enable that without feeling some of the hurt along with the rest of us. Make these corporate assholes think money is stored in the woke
What if the reason doof became evil again isn’t something funny like wanting to fight Perry. But because he learned that Perry would be relocated because he didn’t have a nemesis. And doof knew Perry would be sad about this so he quickly went of social media and posted he was evil again so Perry could stay.
Last night I was trying to go to bed before my third eye opened and realized cavenpuss has four dads, doof made him, Dakota is the reason he was made, and Perry and cavendish’s dna was used to make him, so the qeustion stands what would their ship name be
we stan Doofenshmirtz and he's iconic
Doofenshmirtz is trans and it’s undeniable at this point.
Why does all this crap about Tumblr's sexyman showed in my fyps only not.. whu so late..
So...did u get deja vu?
I can’t wait for when Trump dies in the next three years because of the tumblr sexy man poll of 2028
Doof: "You see Perry The Platypus, about a few weeks ago I entered The Tumblr Sexyman Showdown. It's a contest for only the sexiest of men-- now now, Perry the Platypus, before you roll your eyes at me, it's not the conventional kind of sexy, no, no! It's the pathetic, the silly, the unconventional! Only for the acquired tastes. Like me~!! So I joined in, and you wouldn't believe it! I plowed through the competition! Bracket after bracket, I dominated the votes. That is, until the final round... when I was put up against Stanley Pines of someplace called 'Gravity Falls'-- for some reason, even though he claimed to come from a place called Gravity Falls and I come from the Tri-State Area, the competition listed me to come from someplace called 'Phineas and Ferb', and I have no idea where that is or who those people are--I was kicked to the curb! He won by a landslide! Well, not literally though, that's a metaphor--that's how Bill Cipher won against Jack Frost from Rise of the Guardians, and I KNOW that place doesn't exist--b-but anyway, Stanley won and I only got second. And it doesn't make any sense! Sure, Stanley is similar to what the true Sexyman is, but he's not the greatest! For one thing, he's not that pathetic--jeez, if anyone is the most pathetic here, it's me! He's not that tragic-backstory-able, or anything, he--and worse yet, he's HOT! I mean, he's not that much of an acquired taste! Sure, he's older, but that's it!! Clearly, the people are biased! Which is why I made...THIS!"
Doof: "BEHOLD! THE UNHANDSOME-INATOR!!!!"
Doof: "With this, I can make anyone ugly--so ugly that their ugliness is JUUUST too ugly to be a Tumblr Sexyman! But too handsome to be truly ugly...and I can also tweak it to make myself just a little more handsome, hehe! With this, I will make the ENTIRE TRI-STATE AREA Sexyman ugly, and shoot myself so I will be the most acquired-taste-handsome out of all of them, winning the love of all of the TRI-STATE AREA, AND ENACTING MY REVENGE AGAINST THE TUMBLR SEXYMAN CONTEST!!!"
Doof: "--Or wait, come to think of it, this isn't really revenge, I mean, the contest's over and it won't come back until next year so this scheme prooobably should've been postponed until then... not to mention this inator isn't exactly that tweaked, it's a rushed job has some...ahaha...side effects...unless I CRANK UP THE RANGE OF THE INATOR!"
Doof: "Yes, Perry The Platypus, I will become the most tumblr-sexyman handsome by proxy in all of the tri-state area AND GRAVITY FALLS, OREGON!!!"
| Meanwhile In Gravity Falls |
*Stan, reading the paper, suddenly looks up.*
Stan: "Something just happened."
*beat*
Stan: "...Eh. Who cares. Worse has happened in this town. It's probably the heebie jeebies from that German guy from a couple days ago, eugh."
Stan: "Worth it for the prize money, though. I'm still the sexiest man on all of Tumblr! Ahaha!"
*beat*
Stan, still grinning: "...whatever that is."
*A beat. Then the door to the Mystery Shack slams open. It's Ford.*
Ford: "Stanley! I'm back!"
Stanley: "Hey, sixer. Back from another one of your little adventures?"
Ford: "I suppose you could call it that! Ever been to the tri-state area? There are hundreds of anomalies there! Did you know that all the platypuses are teal there?"
Stanley: "Yeah, yeah...well, make sure to tell me later. I'm reading the paper."
Ford: "Well, don't get too absorbed. We're going to Italy tomorrow, remember? We're visiting the Vatican! Lots of great things to explore there! We might even see the pope!"
Fuck it, favorite character bingo cuz why not
listen listen dr Doofenshmirtz is really the smart scientist here BECAUSE of his self-destruct buttons!! like come on mate if certain inators in today's world had one a those bad boys we'd all be in much better shape, dr D knew something
Entire week late, but what are yah gunna do when you procrastinate. ADHD is ADHD.
And from me to you; a bunch more images of Perry the Platypus, the red-eyed wild Platypus, and Heinz Doofinshmitz. Oh, and Candace and Jeremy.
I now know that google’s generative AI is not, in fact a Phineas and Ferb stan… is it weird to say I’m disappointed???
No one in their right mind can convince me that in the latest Chibiverse episode Perry wasn’t going to say he had feelings for Doof before he was cut off. No one! Not a single person can change that assumption unless the writers disprove it! I WILL TAKE THAT TO MY GRAVE!!!
I’m...I’m sorry, I just this minute realized that there are people out there who have no idea that Heinz Doofenshmirtz is the best fictional father out there. You guys don’t mind if I bombard your entire dashboard with proof right? Excellent.
BONUS: Doofenshmirtz around children he literally just met who wrecked his ‘inator’.
Literally I could go on and on with examples but my computer’s starting to crash from the amount of images.
The point is that Heinz Doofenshmirtz is the greatest fictional father out there and anyone who says otherwise was hit by a Lie-inator.
@howtonerdoutovereverything
day 7: tropes
my favorite pnf trope, with my favorite plot trope
been super busy, so combined day 4 (driver’s license), 5 (dry), and 6 (doofenshmirtz) into one drawing for @howtonerdoutovereverything’s pnf revival challenge
WTF?!?!?
I need to promote this so I’m not the only one who’s falling apart
It could be worse. It could be a panda in a fedora
Okay but imagine your nemesis being a platypus in a fedora
The betrayal
Phineas and Ferb - Season One - “It’s About Time”
Rare gif of Cas chosing Dean instead of heaven.
Agent P is joining Mishapocalypse 3.0.
"I'm scary! Fear me!"
My friend: "You nerd."
Tag yourself: Spooky, Scary, Skeletons
Spooky: Has a lot of energy, wants attention, oversized sweaters, drinks tea, always brings snacks - just in case! knows all the candy stores in the city, cries in stressful situations, needs a hug, is the master of pranks, steal others food, just wants validation, gives the best hugs, is both a dog and a cat person, wears onesies as often as possible.
Scary: Edgelord, “Then perish”, Goth, is a night person, sarcasm 24/7, challenges god to smite them, is done, dark colours, Wears high boots, likes basic things ~ironicly~, black eyeliner and eyeshadow, needs a nap but never sleeps, reads ghost stories in the dark, candles light up their room, wants to make people slightly scared by their presence.
Skeletons: Wants to socialise, is loud, dances in their room, dresses up for Halloween, cites poetry, always wear headphones, is easily exited, a big nerd, has no impulse control, wants to eat all the time but cant (Because they are a skeleton), predicts the plot-twists, extroverted, accidentally spoils things, knows everything about their favourite band.
Aesthetic
October 🍁🕯️
Have you seen my fangs?
Tag yourself: Modern monsters.
Vampire: Black leather jackets and sunglasses, night owl, blood-red lipstick and black eye shadow, deep kisses, mysterious, is a picky eater, intelligent and witty, buys old stuff for “the aesthetic”, wants to see the world, is a wine-person, can do a perfect snarl, eye-rolls at stupid people.
Werewolf: Long and colourfull nails, loves puppies, eat a lot of meat, playful, is athletic, protec and attac, can’t do math, is sweet and lovable, hoodies and running shoes, loves to cuttle, always knows when the next full moon is.
Siren: Coloured hair, wears skirts and dresses, swims at night, shiny highlighter, doesn’t wear shoes, seduces people with her songs, eyes as deep as the ocean, shallow kisses, laughs at her own jokes, sings in the shower, likes the stars, collect crystals and seashells.
Zombie: Wears statement t-shirts, mixes food together, can’t do sports to save her life, knows all the memes, a fangirl TM, would lose her head if it weren’t attached to her body, pillow-forts and blankets, is very lazy.
Witch: Wears all black, magical symbols as tattoos, carries her potions in water-bottles, her house is full of plants, has a pet bird, loves the outdoors, grows her own greens, vegetarian, wears hats, scientific, cat-person.
Ghost: Is shy, cold colours, clothes that flow in the wind, sensitive, cries a lot, mostly stays at home, owns an ouija-board, want everyone to get along, pale, soft lipgloss, is always freezing, walks lightly, doodles on everything, stares through people, remember embarrassing things too often.
I've tried to tell Phineas and Ferb that they shouldn't go to college ever since they were little. . .
Tag yourself: Conspiracy theories.
Tag yourself as these types of conspiracy theorists. If you relate to one of them you have to believe in that conspiracy - even if it is absolute nonsense. I’m sorry. I’m not a fan of it either but that is just how it has to be.
The moon landing was fake: Loves old movies, want to do research, drinks way too much coffee, makes collages, stays up all night, chocolate, fairy-lights, wears converse and denim jackets, drinks boba tea, vintage posters.
College is not free so that people will enlist in the military: Is a nerd, know-it-all, only talks when they have something to say, thinks capitalism will be humanity’s downfall, just wants to take a nap, hopes memes will numb the pain, is probably right tbh.
Aliens build the pyramids: Thinks humans are lazy, loves space and history, wants to travel, stargazing, likes exodic foods, astronomy, wanted to go to the area 51 raid, takes aesthetically pleasing pictures of buildings, is an early bird.
Illuminati controls the world: Wants to be part of a friends group, is stubborn, wants to take down the government, covers their computer camera, wears leather jackets and sunglasses, enjoys videogames, buys pizza once a week.
The Lock Ness monster is real: Loves animals more than people, love mist, wants to go to the zoo, reads about dinosaurs, waterparks, likes walks in the evening, pets are the only friends you need, owns a million plants, loves rain.
I think I'm a forest witch.
Types of witches.
Tag yourself.
Forest witch: She is friends with the forest animals, walks around with a lantern in the dark, her familiars scouts the forest for intruders, no sunlight can pass through the trees, fireflies light up the way for her, overgrown everything, stays up late to walk around the woods.
Swamp witch: Has a cape made of moss, mist crawls across the forest floor, she rises from the murky water, wants people to leave her alone, the vines seems to be alive around her, blends into the scenery, finds herbs and mushrooms for her potions.
Mountain witch: Lives in solitude, collects rocks, loves the clean mountain air, uses rainwater in her spells, wakes up early, hawks keep her company, reads the stars at night, lives in a stone hut, bathes in the waterfalls in the mornings, washes the sun rise and fall.
Village witch: Pretend to be doctor, wants to help people, makes amazing stew in her cauldron, is scared of fire, grows herbs in her garden, talks to ghosts in the graveyard, tries to keep her house clean but fails, has a black cat as a familiar.
Meadow witch: Lives in a cottage under a lonely tree, mist fills the air, no one can hide from her, let magical creatures stay in her house, people who walk into the meadow is never heard from again, the wind starts blowing when she appears in the distance, powerful magic.
Tag yourself: What kind of witch would you be? :) I’d probably be a Mountain Witch.