Emmett Cullen - Blog Posts

Just watched the twilight extended version plus bonus features and I am…. loving life

I’m writing a fanfic rn that’s EdwardxReader and takes place in 1920, but I am SO excited for when Alice and Emmett join the clan because Reader&Alice&Emmett are going to be a horribly amazing trio

Bears when they see Emmett coming

𝓗𝓾𝓷𝓽𝓮𝓻

A/n: I decided to bring my twilight fix over to here. I have this love hate relationship with twilight so that’s heavily reflected in this fic. Now there are some darker elements that I play with like most of my works. Feel free to stop reading at anytime.

Word Count: 4,539

Trigger Warnings: child abuse, depression, war, war crimes, imprisonment, torture, abuse, predatory behavior, anxiety, nightmares, suicidal thoughts, death  gore, murder, teen pregnancy, drug abuse, alcohol addiction, just heavy themes all around

Prologue

Lαʂƚ Dҽϝҽɳԃҽɾʂ 

A man held the hand of a young girl. The man was a tall African man with long brown locks tied back. He was wearing a skin tight black outfit with weapons in his back. He looked down at the girl with his hazel eyes and smiled at her.

She had s/c skin that was shining in the torch light. Her h/c hair was tied into two pigtails. She was dressed in a white dress and black shoes. She holding onto a small brown bear plushie. 

As the man pulled her through the hall her e/c eyes looking over the halls. She looks up at the man as he pulls her. She tilts her head up and him in confusion. The man paused before a large set of doors and kneels to the five year old girls height.

“Okay honey it’s time. Now who am I?” The man asks the girl.

“Mr. Kijani.” She answers with a smile.

Kijani nods his head with a smile. He lightly pets her hair and holds her hands.

“Who are you?” Kijani questions.

“Y/n Bendis Swan, and this is Lockheed.”

Y/n says while pointing at her bear. Kijani smiles and nods his head.

“What else are you?” Kijani ponders. Y/n tilts her head confused as his question. Kijani gently turns over her right hand and shows her wrist. On her wrist was a symbol of a eclipse. Kijani motioned to the symbol in her skin.

“You are the first of your kind, you are the first female Eclipse Hunter in existence.You are the first Female hunter ever.” Kijani explains while looking into Y/n’s eyes. Y/n nods her head as Kijani stands up. He takes Y/n’s hand on his agin. Then the door opens.

The pair walk into the room and many people gather in the room. There are seven high chairs with people sitting the the front of the room.

A man looking similar to Kijani just with shorter hair and darker eyes looks at the pair.

“Brother, why had this meeting been called? The counsel along with myself are confused.” Kijani brother asks. 

“I apologize if I interrupted anything but this is of the utmost importance, surly you understand Kellan.” Kjjani said.

Kellan nods his head and the other counsel members nod. Y/n looks at the table of counsel members with a look of child curiosity. She hides behind Kjjani and holds tightly onto Lockheed.

“Brother, why have you brought a child here?” Kellan asks.

“Brother I wish for this girl to be admitted into the academy.” Kjjani said confidently.

The room erupted in gasps and confusion. The counsel members stared down at Kjjani with confusion and intrigue in their eyes.

“Master Hunter Kjjani, why on earth would we administer this girl into the academy.” A man with red hair and beard asks.

Kjjani lets put a small sigh and gently grabs Y/n. He pulls her in front of him and she shyly stares at them. He gently grabs her wrist and shows it to the room. 

The room erupted in more gasps and this time shock. This girl bore the mark of a Eclipse Hunter. A small eclipse symbol was embedded into her skin. A man with blonde hair, black eyes, and tan skin stood from his chair.

“Impossible! No women could ever be a Eclipse Hunter! It’s not possible!” The man yells. Kjjani turns to him with a small smile.

“On the contrary Lord Leo, this girl is the first and only of her kind. She is your kind, she is your kin.” Kjjani argued. Lord Leon sat back into his throne. Other lords share glances and look towards Kellan. 

“Brother, ever if she we wanted her to be admitted she is too old. We have never taken a child older than two. She would be behind in studies and training. She’d fail everything.” Kellan admitted.

Lord Leon glared down at Y/n with his piercing black eyes. Y/n looked up at Lord Leon with her, Y/n shrunk behind Kjjani. Kellan stared down at Y/n and tilted his head. 

Kellan stood from his throne and walked towards Y/n. Kellan kneels down in front of Y/n. She hides behind Kjjani, she holds tightly onto Lockheed. 

Kellan holds his hands out for Y/n. Kjjani nudges Y/n forward. Y/n steps forward and Kellan takes her hands in his much larger ones. Kellan looked at the symbol on her wrist.

He let out a sigh, this was a sigh of change. No women had ever be a hunter. They couldn’t withstand the trail. Some hunters didn’t survive and died. 

How ever Kellan felt it. The power of a hunter was in her. A new power unlike one her had felt before. As Kellan looked into Y/n’s eyes he knew it was true. Kellan thought back to the prophecy of Eclipse. Maybe they were wrong.

“Lords of the Hunters, this is the dawn of a new age. She is a sign of change, and I believe we should admit her to the academy.” Kellan voiced while standing up. 

The lords shoot him looks of disapproval. The lords look to Kjjani of guidance. Kellan hides his envy as the lords look to his brother.

“There may never be another like her, if we don’t this opportunity will be lost. She could be something we could never imagine.” Kjjani informs the Lords.

The Lords all share a quick look and raise their hands one by one. The only lord who doesn’t raise his hand is Lord Leon. Leon glares down at Y/n. 

After a moment Lord Leon raised his hand. His glare never left Y/n.

Y/n sat up in her bed, her room was dark. The sun has yet to rise, but Y/n lould no longer sleep. She left a burning sensation on her right shoulder. All she could do was sigh and place her hand onto her shoulder. 

On her shoulder was a brand of the Hunters. The brand bares a circle with seven slits, and in the middle is and eclipse with stars around it. In the seven slits is the symbol of each Hunter Order. Her left hand touched the  brand and she let out a pained sigh. Her hand held a soft glow as she removed it.

“Healing magic doesn’t work on a brand.” Y/n mumbles to herself.

Y/n looked over her arms. She could feel them, just couldn’t see them right now. They only showed if a monster was near, or if she was using her powers. The markings of an Eclipse Hunter. Y/n could still feel how they carved into her skin with the dagger and felt the marks. 

She stood from her bed and walked into her bathroom. Before she entered she light the candles so she would have light. With the door open she clean herself up. She looked over at her roommates. Damon Drakin laid in his bed with drool rolling down his face. 

His brown hair was messy and his honey skin was shadowed in the candle light. His body was tangled with his bed sheets. She could see his olive eyes but he slept still.

As she looked at her other roommate she sees as Aerion Night opened his eyes. His pale skin looks iridescent in the light. His pale blonde hair reaches his shoulders. He rubs his copper eyes.

“Hey Y/n, why are you up? The suns not even awake?” Aerion whispered as to not wake their friend. Damon snores loudly and the pair giggle to themselves.

“Couldn’t sleep, wanna go for a run?” Y/n asked quietly. Aerion stands up and nods gently. He enters the bathroom with Y/n and he brushes his teeth. Y/n pulled her hair into a ponytail.

She quickly dressed into her training clothes and looked at Aerion. His suit is white in color, it has built in armor that is light and easy to move in. Y/n suit is the same but the color is grey.

The pair made their beds quickly and Y/n took extra care to place her stuffed brown bear Lockheed onto her bed. Aerion smiles at her as she places her bear down.

“You’re real lucky they let you keep that bear, the academy usually tries to make away emotional attachments to the human world.” Aerion says as he opens the dorm door. Damon mumbles in his sleep as the pair leave the dorm. 

“Lockheed is an exception to that rule.” Y/n smirked. The pair walk in together down the candle light engaging in small conversation. The pair take a turn and run into Kjjani.

“And where do you two think you’re going?” Kjjani asked looking down at Y/n manly.

 Y/n smiled up at her mentor with spoke “We’re going for a run.”

Kjjani nodded and smiled at the pair.

“Don’t stray far from the academy.” Kjjani said and he began to walk away. Kjjani turned back to the pair looking at Y/n.

“Oh and Y/n.” Kjjani said.

“Yes?” Y/n pondered while turn towards him. Aerion walked forward a little.

“Have a good last day at the academy. And happy future hunting.” Kjjani said the walked away with a proud smile on his face. Y/n held a confident smile on her face as the pair walks away.

As they exited the academy they look at it. It’s a stone castle with large towers. The ceremonial courtyard still glowed with the after use of the Hunters ceremony. The water of the lake glowed with a light hum.

As the pair look at the lake there brands burned lightly. It had only been three days, and now they were full fledged Hunters.

Aerion pulled away from the lake first but Y/n stared a little longer. She looked the place where she was last human. Today was it, her last day at the academy. And she’s get to go home for really this time.

The fifteenth year old walked towards Aeriona nod tengen started their run. As the pair ran together at a nonhuman speed the woods around the academy glistened. The dome around the academy was strong and only had few weak points.

 The they felt it, the pair froze in their tracks. It was a monster, and it was near the school. Y/n went to the some and felt the pull of a monster. Y/n turned to Aerion with a hopeful look. Aerion shot her a look that said “No fucking way Y/n.” but Y/n pulled out her puppy eyes.

“No, no Y/n we were told not to stray far from the academy.” Aerion argued.

“Oh come one Aerion, it’s my last day at the academy. It’s my last day before I go hunt really monsters, not just the one that lurk around the school. Real dangerous monsters, I could use some last minute practice.” Y/n begged holding her hands together. 

Aerion let out a sigh and summoned his staff. Y/n squealed in delight as Aerion parted the dome. Y/n sliped rebought and Aerion followed.

“Good I can’t believe we’re doing this, we’re gonna get in some much trouble.” Aerion groaned.

“Oh no we’re not! We not going to far from the academy, it’s fine.” Y/n giggled while reaching behind her back. A large sword with a thick black blade and golden hilt appears in her hand.

“I don’t understand why you think you need more practice, you killed a real dangerous monster in your trial.” Aerion said but immediately regret after he saw the look on Y/n’a face.

“That was different.” Y/n softly added. Aerion sigh and placed a hand on Y/n’s shoulder.

“I know I’m sorry I brought it up. I know your trial was the hardest out of everyone’s.” Aerion said. Y/n shrugged her shoulders.

“Lord Leon made so I would fail, but I succeeded.” Y/n sighed as they tracked the monster throughout the woods. 

“Are you excited though? For going home I mean.” Aerion asked as he helped Y/n down a ledge.

“I’m more scared actually, I haven’t seen my dad in like five years. I haven’t been able to go in five summers.” Y/n admitted as she walked next to him.

Before Aerion could answer they pair heard the sound of the monster they were tracking. The ogre roared and Aerion gasps. Y/n smirked as she saw the monster. But she knew the code.

“Aerion go warn the school, I’ll deal with the ogre.” Y/n whispered. Aerion shook his head but one look from Y/n made him agree. With seconds Aerion was gone. Y/n held her hands over her hip and a steel rope appeared. 

Y/n stepped behind the Ogre as us faces the other way. She rolls her shoulders and lasso the rope around its neck. The ogre growled and tried to get out but Y/n planted her feet.

As the ogre pulled her feet sunk into the ground. Y/n tied the rope around her wrist as she held into the ogre. Then suddenly the ogre ran forwards dragging Y/b through the woods.

Y/n shouted excitingly as she was pulled. Her feet dragged on the ground creating dents as she was deranged. 

“WOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAHHH!” Y/b yelled as the academy came into view. The other new hunters stood at the front of the academy ready to attack. Y/n saw this and rolled her eyes. She pulled back and planted her feet into the ground. 

As she pulled the ogre tries to escape. She groaned as the ogre tried to pull. She groaned in pain as she held back the ogre, then she remembered something.

“Oh yeah, I know the incarnations.” Y/n thought. 

“๒ץ Շђє ק๏ฬєг ร๏๒єк, ﻮเשє ๓є รՇгєภﻮՇђ!” Y/n yelled.

A black substance slowly crawled up her arms and engulfed her hands. The same happened on her legs then it disappeared into her skin. The ogre stopped as Y/n’s strength kicked it. Y/n pulled back and the ogre went flying, hitting the ground incredibly hard. 

Y/n pulled in the rope quickly and then held her right right hand out. Her sword materialized out of the air and she held tightly onto the hilt. With one swing the Ogres head was off its body.

Blood splattered over Y/n as the other hunters ran towards her. At the front was Lord Leon and his youngest son Leo. Within seconds Leon began to reprimand Y/n. Damon stood with all the hunters and couldn’t help but roll his eyes.

Lord Leon hated Y/n and it wasn’t a secret. There could only ever be Five Eclipse Hunters and their Lord at a time. Due to the five phases of an eclipse. Y/n excising meant that ons if Lord Leon’s down had to die.

Damon and Aerion sent Y/n sympathetic looks. Damon raised his hand and began to act out Lord Leon he yelled. Y/n looked at him over Leon’s shoulder and held in her laughs. Aerion jabbed Damon and he groaned in pain.

“Lord Leon, here.” Y/n stepped forward and handed Lord Leon the head. Y/n smirked at him and walked away as Leo stopped his father from yelling anymore.

“Father don’t, she killed the monster. No harm was done.” Leo mumbled as Damon and Aerion walked next to Y/n. As the trio walked through the campus blood dropped off Y/n.

“I thought I said don’t leave campus?” Kjjani’s voice echoed through the hall. The trio stopped dead in their tracks. The trio all exchanged looks and slowly turned to Kjjani.

“Master Kjjani if we get technical, you said not to stray far from the path. We only went a little ways out of the dome.” Y/n mumbled nervously. Kjjani glares at the trio and they all shrunk down. 

“Go pack, you’ll all be leaving soon. Before you head off make sure to go to the armor, you’ll need to collect all your weapons.” Kjjani said. Y/n nodded at her mentor and turns away. The trio quickly entered their dorm and shared a quickly glance.

Then after a moment or two of silence they burst out laughing. The group laughed as they remembered the look on Leon’s face as Y/n handed him the ogre head.  

The first to start packing was Aerion while his two friend laid on the ground together. Aerion smiled down at them and started to pack. After a while Y/n stood up and started to pack.

“Hey Y/n didn’t you see how Leo ran to your defense?” Damon asked from the floor. Y/n froze putting her books in her suitcase. She dropped the books on the ground and one with a black cover and symbol of the titians opened.

Damon quickly grabbed the book while Y/n stuttered over her words. Aerion stepped out from the bathroom and nodded his head.

“No! No he didn’t, you’re wrong!” Y/n argued while trying to get her book back. Damon rolled under his bed and Y/n let out a frustrated groan. Damon confused to look over the book in confusion. 

It was Titian book, not meant for new hunters. Granted Y/n wasn’t a “new” new hunter. Kjjani had taken her out hunting before her ceremony. And in there testing Y/n was sent on actually hunts by Lord Leon.

“Think about it Y/n ever since you saved him he’s been protecting your ass from his dad.” Aerion answered as he walked out of the bathroom with his and Y/n’s stuff. Y/n took her stuff with a small thanks and placed it into her black bag. 

“You all forget that out of Leon’s sons Leo hates me the most.” Y/n vocalized. Aerion turned from his bed and stared at her.

“You saved his life Y/n, he doesn’t hate you.” Aerion declared. Y/n shook her head and placed more of her books into the smaller black suitcase.

Under his bed Damon continued through the book. The dark arts, monsters hunters should never see were in the book, And how to kill them. Not only that but how to control said monsters. This book was meant for Lunar Hunters.

“I didn’t save his life, I repaid a debt! I wouldn’t have saved him if he hadn’t saved me!” Y/n affirmed. Aerion shook his head and handed Y/n her face wash.

“We both know ever if Leo hadn’t saved you, you would have still helped him.” Aerion remarked. Y/n shook her head as Damon came out from under his bed. Y/n took her book away and placed it in her suit case. She quickly closed it.

“What was that book?” Damon spat. His tone confused Aerion but Y/n just smiled at him.

“Just a book Master Kjjani gave me, that’s all.” Y/n answered. Damon looked at Y/n with a small glare. That book wasn’t meant for her, it was meant for someone who wanted power. Someone who wanted to hurt others. After all it was a Titian book.

“Y/n don’t read this again, it’s Titian book!” Damon growled. Y/n rolls her eyes and placed some for her cloths away. Aerion gasped to himself and placed a hand on Y/n’s shoulder.

“N/n why would you read one for those? DO you know the kind of trouble-“ Aerion started but was cut off as Y/n whipped around. 

“Stop! It’s fine, Kjjani just wanted me to have it just in case. You never know, I barely even know what’s in it.” Y/n blurted. The pair nodded and went back to packing. After a few hours of procrastinating and packing the trio laid on there clean bed and looked around there room. Ten years of memories were embedded into this room. And now they would be leaving never to enter it again. Sure they’d all go back to the academy.

That’s where the counsel resided. But they never come back to this room. There was the chance they’d never see each other in person again. The first to get up this time was Y/n. She stood and stretched her legs. 

She made her way to their door and turned to the boys with a small smile. Aerion then pulled Damon up. With much protest from Damon the trio walked through the academy.

As they walked through the halls they observed the hunters in training. Some were drenched in sweat others were not. Making it to the armory door it was decorated with the symbol of the hunters.

It was a round circle with seven slits and one circle in the middle. In each slit was one of the Hunter Orders. 

The Gust Hunters, the larges order of hunters. There abilities allowed them to find monsters through the wind. Along with master manipulation of the winds and sky’s. Manly hunt sky monsters.

The Evergreen Hunters, the calmest order. There abilities allowed them manipulate over the green, or the earth. Manly hunt green monsters (Monsters of plant origin.)

The Blaze Hunters, the hottest order. There abilities allowed manipulation of heat, and all things hot. Manly hunt fire monsters/ demons.

The Agua Hunters, the most beautiful order. There abilities allows control of water, in any form. Manly hunts monsters related water.

The Blood Hunters, the cruelest order. There abilities allow control of blood and body. Can manipulate one’s blood in solid objects.  Manly hunts blood related monsters.

The Solar Hunters, the ethereal order. There abilities allow control light and solar energy. Seen as the holy order, and the true good hunters. Also a smaller order. Manly hunts darkness, or evil related monsters.

The Lunar Hunters, the shadow order. There abilities allow control of shadows and darkness. Seen as the sinful order. Also a small order. Manly hunts light, or sun related monsters.

The last and smallest order is The Eclipse Hunters. There abilities allow control of most elements if trained properly. Seen as the order of gods. This order consists of only six people. The Lord Eclipse and his five sons. One son for each faze of an Eclipse. Hunts all monsters.

Y/n couldn’t help but grimace at the symbol. In the dead center was the eclipse symbol. She couldn’t help but feel insignificant. She was the first of her kind. Not only was she the first female hunter but the first extra Eclipse hunter.

Damon pushed the door open gently and it let out a soft creek. The two stepped in the room and Lord Kellan stood. He threw a dagger at Y/n’s face which she caught easily. She smiled at Killian and walked towards him. She gently handed him back the dagger. Kellan placed the dagger in a black duffel bag.

“You caught it, that makes it yours.” Kellan said with a soft smile. Kellan stared down at Y/n with a look that Damon and Adrian didn’t like. The pair collect there weapons as Kellan helps Y/n pack hers. 

“Boys don’t forget to grab your watches before you leave.” Kellan told the boys as the finished packing there weapons. Damon glared at Kellan and begrudgingly grabbed his watch. It was a black watch with red stones around the clock.

Aerion merely nodded and grabbed his watch. His watch had golden stones around the clock. Both watches glowed gently and there enchantments were placed. Kellan gently guided Y/n over to a stand.

At this stand was multiple pieces of jewelry. Rings, bracelets, earrings, and one amulet. The boys gasped in confusion as Y/n gasps Y/n gasped in surprise.

“What! Why does she get so many blockers?” Damon gasped. Kellan shoot him and glare as he placed the extras jewelry into a black bag.

“Because we don’t know if one blocker will work for Y/n. After all this is the first time a female hunter had ever been using a blocker. I’m not sure if just one will work.” Kellan reasoned with Damon.

Kellan smiled at Y/n as she inspected the jewelry he left out. A ring with an eclipse stone. A leather bracelet with hunter symbols and a eclipse gem. The pendent also had a eclipse stone.The pendant was incredibly beautiful, and Y/n could feel the power radiating off it. 

“I had this pendant made myself, may I?” Kellan said while he picked up the pendant. Y/n smiled and nodded her head. She held up her hair as Kellan placed the pendant on her neck.

Damon and Aerion glared fiercely at Kellan as his hand’s grazed over Y/n’s neck. Once Kellan was done Y/n smiled at him and placed on the ring and bracelet. She grabbed the duffel bag and turned towards the boys. They quickly guided her away from Kellan and as the left the armory Kellan merely smiled at them.

………………………………

The trio stood in front of the portals the the mortal realm with sorrowful looks on there faces. This would be the last time they would be together as a trio as far as they knew. Sure they would call each other from the mortal realm but they wouldn’t see each other for a long time.

There was that chance that they would never see each other after they stepped through the portals. The trio stood next to each other as people were called one by one. Other went before them as there last names were called out.

Leo was called and before he left he looked to Y/n. He walked towards her and his blonde curls bounced lightly. He held out his hand and Y/n grasped it gently.

“Good luck Eclipse.” Leo announced as he let go of her hand.

“Good Luck….. Eclipse.” Y/n answered at Leo walked away. She felt odd, she felt as though she had just lost a friend. Leo wasn’t her friend, and least she didn’t think he was. Damon turned to his two friend with a mournful smile.

“This is it, isn’t it.” Damon mumbled as tears prickled at his eyes. The emotions crashed onto the trio. This was it. In just a few moments Damon’s name would be called and he would be gone. Y/n reached over her back and her swords materialized out if the air. She held her sword up with a sad expression.

“Last defenders.” Y/n sighed. Her voice was soft and emotion weighted in it. The boys shared a look and there own swords materialized.

“No surrender.” The pair mumbled. Then there swords dissolved, and Damon’s name was called. Y/n pulled him into a tight hug and Aerion did the same. Then with one last look to his friend he walked through the portal.

Just like that Damon was gone. Then after a while the same thing happened with Aerion. Then he was gone. Then Y/n was called as she walked to the portal she looked back at the academy. With one last look she walked through the portal.

A blaring light invaded Y/n eyes and then it was gone. Y/n was at the airport where he dad would be picking her up. She pulled all her luggage as then tears began to fall from her e/c eyes.

Her dad, Charlie Swan held up a sign with her name written in it. Y!n speeded through the crowds and ran into her fathers arms for the first time in ten years. Her luggage fell to the floor as she crashed into her father. Charlie held tightly onto his daughter as they cried in each others arms.

And for that moment everything was perfect. Y/n was home, but she had no idea for what would happen now.

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I read and watched Twilight for the first time recently and I have some thoughts:

- Why are the Cullens in high school ?? They're like over 100 years old and they're going to school with minors ?? Just so they can stay in town for a few extra years ??

- Did the ppl making the movie notice that the owl statue made Edward look like he has fairy wings ? Was it on purpose ?

- The book would be so much better if Bella wasn't there and it was just about the Cullens hanging out and playing baseball

- Alice x Jasper ? Yeah I don't see it ( she should be with me 😌 )

- So Jessica, Mike and Co. just like invited Bella into their friendship group and they were really nice to her and she just blew them off for a MAN ?! ( Girl what ??) I would have loved to make friends that fast but she doesn't even care

- Edward sparkling in the sun and being all like "this is the skin of a killer, Bella" 💀

- The Cullens were so proud of the dinner they cooked for Bella and she didn't even want it 😭 Invite me over ! I'll eat it !

- Edward just like 🧍‍♂️ watching Bella sleep

- Do the Cullens have to keep updating their drivers licenses, birth certificates etc over and over again ?

- Why do the Cullens keep living the same lives just to fit in ? Why can't y'all just live in a castle or something like normal vampires?

- Why are people arguing over Edward and Jacob when Carlisle is right there?

Overall, the book and film weren't my kind of thing but they were fairly entertaining. Yes there are some parts of twilight I didn't like but I will be reading and watching the sequels at some point :)

I don't feel like Emmett gets enough love...maybe something where reader really wants his attention but he is hunting (or something like that) and really misses the feeling of his lips and hands...I'd also prefer to see how cheeky and lighthearted he can be...thank youuuu

a/n: I really loved writing this and thank you sm for the request! Emmett is a super underrated character and I always love getting to write about him. I hope you enjoy the story :)

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miss me?

gn!reader x emmett cullen (fluff)

words: 1243

summary: You can’t help missing Emmett, your boyfriend, while he’s away hunting. When he’s finally back he learns how much you missed him, which results in him playfully teasing you. 

“Is it even fair that you’re playing Scrabble with us?” you ask Edward, frustrated about your losing streak. Esme, Carlile, Edward, and you are all playing Scrabble together in the living room. Alice and Rosalie are there too, but neither of them are playing. Rosalie is watching a soap opera and Alice is knitting something. She says it’s going to be a sweater, but it doesn’t really look like one. 

“It’s Scrabble, not poker. Reading minds doesn’t exactly help me with this game,” Edward responds as he lays down the word fuliginous. 

“What the fuck kind of work is fuliginous?” you ask, annoyed with him.

“It means sooty,” Edward said sassily. Carlisle laughed under his breath, trying to hide it. Carlisle and Esme had really embraced you as one of their kids, but like most siblings, you and Edward were always teasing each other about something. In fact, most people in this family were always teasing each other. It made everyone feel more human to not be so grim all the time. That’s what had originally attracted you to Emmett. He was always laughing or cracking jokes, and he reminded you not to take everything so seriously. That’s why when he first confessed his love to you, you thought it was just some joke. Right after, when he started kissing you, you realized it was serious. 

“I forfeit,” Carlisle said. 

“What?” You asked disappointedly. In the Cullen house it was widely agreed that if someone forfeit it felt like no one truly won. 

“Yeah, he’s got nothing he can play,” Edward responded. Clearly his mind reading was helping him with Scrabble. 

“Why do you seem so upset?” Esme asked you, softly touching your hand. At heart, she was such a mother.

“Because Scrabble was an effort to pass the time while waiting for Emmett to come back,” Edward responded while looking at you, trying to embarrass you. Yesterday, Emmett and Jasper left to go hunting together and they wouldn’t be back until tomorrow. Emmett returning had been all that you’d thought about since he left, and it was starting to drive Edward insane. You couldn’t get his lips off your mind. Cold, soft, always ready to kiss you with so much passion. The thought of his hands was even worse. You reminisced on how large and strong they were. You constantly replayed in your mind the memories of Emmett holding your hips like someone holding onto their favorite mug. Tightly, tight enough to never drop it, but gentle enough to not make it shatter. 

“Don’t worry, they’ll be back early,” Alice tells you from across the room. “But when they’re back you might not be so happy about it,” Alice warns you playfully. Edward laughs, presumably having already seen whatever Alice predicted. You just roll your eyes and start to clean up the board game. 

The next day you stayed in bed all morning watching reruns of your favorite show, hiding away under your comforter. You only got out of bed and got dressed for the day after Alice told you to “look presentable for when Emmett gets home.” Even if she also teased about how much you missed Emmett that weekend, you knew she’d understand. According to Edward, she’d been thinking about nothing but date ideas for when Jasper was back. You were biased, so of course you thought that you and Emmet were the cutest couple, but you had to admit Jasper and Alice were a very close second. 

“They’re here!” Alice shouted excitedly from downstairs. You quickly rushed down, excited to see Emmett once again. It had been a long weekend, and even if you had infinite time with him, it never made the time away from him any easier. 

“Hey, darlin’,” Jasper says as he walks through the front door, quickly grabbing Alice’s hand and kissing it gently. Emmett walked in a few seconds later and began to lean on the doorframe. He had one hand on his waist and the other propped up against the door frame, trying to look seductive. As always, it worked. 

“Miss me, sweetheart?” Emmett asks you playfully. You laugh and he quickly walks over to envelop you in a hug, running his hands through your hair after he does.

“How do you know about that,” you ask confusedly, reluctantly removing yourself from the hug.

“Well, according to the rest of the family you just couldn’t stand to be without me. Constantly talking about how you miss my muscles and my mouth and my-”

“Okay, that’s enough,” you say, embarrassed. He wiggles his eyebrows at you and you have to try not to laugh. 

“Y’know, I remember you thinking about how when you got Emmett alone again you were gonna-” You immediately cut Edward off the same way you had Emmett. It’s a miracle Emmett can’t blush, because he knows if he was human he’d be firetruck red. 

“Oh, I’m gonna kill you,” you shout as you try to jump at Edward. Emmett quickly grabs you by the waist, pulling you back as you make an attempt to strangle Edward. You hear Emmet laugh at your antics as you send a piercing glare Edward’s way. 

“Calm down, killer,” Emmett remarks lightheartedly. Edward hisses at you like a cat that’s been dumped in water, so you reach an arm out to him, pretending to try and claw at him.

“Oh! They’re having another cat fight!” Alice exclaims, causing the whole room to laugh. 

“Let’s get you away from this moron,” Emmett jokes, throwing a cheeky glance at Edward. Without warning, he quickly throws you over his shoulder and begins to walk toward your bedroom. That vampire speed and strength really allows him to do anything. You make an attempt to playfully hit his back as you dangle from his shoulder, but it’s a fruitless endeavor. You hear small laughs from everyone else, but you're not even embarrassed. They’re your family. 

“So, what was it you were gonna do to me when we’re alone?” Emmett asks playfully as he walks up the stairs, still carrying you. He sets you down on the ground when the two of you make it to your room, looking at you with an expectant smirk. You sit on the bed, and he looks down at you curiously. 

“You’ll find out soon enough,” you tease. 

“Don’t taunt me,” he warns with a grin. “Besides, I don’t blame you. Who could resist a big strong man like moi?” He asks as he begins to flex his biceps. 

“Yuck,” you joke, pushing his arm away.

“Oh please,” he rolls his eyes playfully and sits down next to you. “I heard about how much you missed me. And my hands. And my lips.”

“I really will kill Edward,” You respond, deadpan.

“You’ll have to get through me first,” Emmett teases. He wraps his arms around you and flexes his muscles, causing them to tighten around you. 

“No way, I’ll feel too bad when you lose,” you say, trying to hold back a smile as you pretend to be worried about him losing a fight to you. 

“In your dreams,” he scoffs, removing his arms from around you, pretending to be hurt. 

“In my dreams for sure,” you respond flirtatiously, causing Emmett to laugh.

“Dork,” he responds, kissing you right after. He would probably be teasing you about how much you missed him for a while, but that might be something you could get used to. 

love bites & apologies

gn!reader x jasper hale

words: 1960

summary: when Jasper accidentally leaves marks on y/n’s neck after kissing them, he has to figure out how to make it up to them and their parents.

“Sugar, you are so sweet,” Jasper’s words came out like a husky southern growl, just centimeters away from your face. Slowly, his hands push through your hair as his icy lips move down your neck. He sends a chill down your spine with the feeling of his cold touch, and yet your whole body feels hot with pleasure. Just as Jasper begins to pin you down, his lips still grazing your warm neck, the sound of someone clearing their throat startles both of you. The two of you turn to face the person quickly, and embarrassment adorns your face when you realize who caught you. Jasper releases the firm grip he had on you and raises his eyebrows at the towering lean figure standing in the doorway.

“Y’know, I can hear all your thoughts, and usually that would be helpful, but I don’t want to hear,” Edward pauses to glance between the two of you, “those thoughts.” Your face flushes with embarrassment, and Jasper’s would too, if he was still capable of it.

“I’ll have you know, from the moment you met Bella, I could feel every emotion you felt about her, and that was ten times worse. Do you know how awkward it is to feel lust emitting from the house, just to find out it’s coming from your brother?” A smirk is still etched onto Jasper’s face as he finishes drawing out the words with his charming Southern accent. Edward tenses with embarrassment, and he doesn’t say anything for a long time, considering what Jasper knows. Then, as he begins to look back between the couple sprawled out on Jasper's bed, he begins to laugh.

“Why is he doing that?” you ask in a low mumble. Jasper gives Edward a look of confusion, before turning to you. The second he sees you, his face drops, no longer smirking, and he is in utter shock.

“Oh, Emmett is gonna love this,” Edward says between laughs. Before Edward even finished his sentence Emmett was standing at his side with just the mention of his name. When he looked into the room, he burst into laughter too.

“Nice one, Jasper!” Emmett exclaims as he pats Jasper’s shoulder with intense force, almost knocking Jasper, who is in a trance-like state, over. “It’s like you’re all grown up. Quite the cowboy,” He says, sarcastically. Your confusion is palpable to the brothers, but before you can even ask, Edward is pointing a small handheld mirror at you, giving you a great view of your neck. It’s almost entirely purplish-red from all the places Jasper had been kissing you. You let out a gasp that causes all laughter to cease.

“I’d love to help you,” Edward said with a smile, almost as if he was enjoying this moment, “but since Vampires don’t have blood, we don’t have this problem.” As his brothers spoke, Jasper stood to the side, continuing to look down at you with a slight horror at the mistake he made.

“We could try makeup? I know Rosalie has a ton somewhere around here,” Emmett suggests, at least trying to be helpful.

“Going home with pasty white makeup all over your neck is almost more suspicious than just letting people see the hickeys,” Edward said to Emmett playfully. “And also, curfew is in fifteen minutes, so I’d hurry home,” Edward says to you, knowing this will only be worse if you also break your curfew.

Before you’d even had time to think of a plan, Jasper was already ushering you to the car. He raced down the slick asphalt to your house in the silver Jeep. The car was completely silent the whole drive, but Jasper kept a firm grip on your thigh with his right hand. Emmett and Edward were in the back, and as you pull into the driveway, you can only hope your parents won’t kill you.

“Hold on,” Jasper says, his cool hand touches your jaw, and he leans in to give you a soft, cold, longing kiss, “just in case it’s the last time,” he mumbles into your ear as he reluctantly pulls away from the kiss.

“They can’t ground me for as long as you're alive,” you remark playfully.

“Yes, but they can ground you for as long as you’re alive,” he says, with a sweet syrupy quality to his voice. His hand slowly and delicately traces down your jaw until it's back in his atmosphere again. You crave to grab his hand or to press his skin against yours for just one last second, but you know you can’t look like this and be late. You climb out of the Jeep, step inside your house, and close the door behind you, but Jasper doesn’t take the Jeep out of park.

“What are we doing, Jasper?” Emmett questions uneasily.

“Jasper wants to know what y/n’s parents are going to feel when they see what happened,” Edward explained, already knowing what Jasper was thinking, which was helpful because Jasper would give anything not to speak right now. No one said anything for a moment, but then Jasper tensed, sitting up a little straighter. Edward slumped back, seeming almost uncomfortable by what was happening. Emmett could tell this meant that your parents had noticed, and things didn’t seem good.

“I can feel their emotions. It’s so strong that I can hardly distort them, at least not from this far.” Jasper paused after the words left his mouth, but he didn’t move. “What are they thinking, Edward?”

“I don’t want to say,” Edward said monotonously. Emmett stiffened, and for someone so hard to miss, he seemed to wash away with the tension of the moment.

“Tell me,” Jasper demanded. The brothers sat very still for a very long time before anyone spoke again. The sound of chirping crickets filled their ears, and the stars shined down on them. However, they didn't notice any of their surroundings, as they focused their attention on what was happening in your house.

“They think you’re a freak,” he paused, for what felt like centuries, before saying, “They want you two to break up.” Before Edward can continue, Jasper put the car in reverse and sped home so fast that even Edward wanted to suggest slowing down.

“What am I going to do?” Jasper asked as he opened the front door to the Cullen's house. Emmett and Edward shuffled in behind him without a word.

“You’re going to have to make it up to y/n’s parents,” Emmet advised.

“You’re going to have to make it up to y/n too,” as soon as the words escaped Edward's mouth Emmett and Jasper were staring at him, waiting for an explanation. “When I was listening to their thoughts, y/n was mad that you weren’t more careful.”

“I’ll figure something out,” Jasper said, his voice full of exasperation.

A week passes, and somehow Jasper finds himself standing next to Carlisle at your doorstep.

“Jasper, I’m surprised you asked me to do this for you,” Carlisle says quietly as he taps his stone-cold hand against your front door. “This relationship must mean a lot to you.” The door opens before their conversation continues, and they’re greeted with your father's presence. Days had passed since Jasper had gotten to see you. After what happened last week, Jasper called your house, but when your father answered, he told Jasper to never call back again. Jasper had hoped he’d be able to talk with you at school, but you anxiously avoided him, and he wasn’t looking to upset you anymore. It was the slowest week of his 160-year-old life.

“It’s great to see you. I’m Dr. Cullen, Jasper’s father. I was wondering if we could have a word?” Your father is hesitant at the question, but allows the two of them to come inside. The three of them sit at the dining table that your mother is already occupying. As they sit, Jasper nervously fumbles with his hands, worried that his plan to involve Carlisle as his ‘father’ wouldn’t work the way he hoped.

“Jasper,” you say as you walk into the kitchen, surprised to see them, “and Carlisle, what’s going on?” You make your way to the table and sit down on the far end, with Jasper on one side of you, and your father on the other. Jasper could feel the nervousness emitting from you, and it almost matched his own. He wanted to grab on to you and never let go as he took in your intoxicating scent and warm skin, but instead, he settled for inconspicuously placing a hand on your knee and hoping your family didn’t notice.

“I wanted to discuss with you all what happened last week,” Carlisle said, looking more serious than you’d ever seen him. When he said the words, almost everyone in the room had their eyes on your (no longer purple) neck. Except for Jasper, who was looking deep into your eyes as if they could heal him or ease his pain. “What Jasper did was irresponsible, and I do not condone that kind of behavior. We have both raised two very responsible, mature, and sensible kids. As disapproving as I am, what they did was not dangerous. Our children had the self-control to stop themselves before things got too out of hand. I know these kids make each other happy, and I believe we should continue to let them see each other.” Carlisle hardly gave anyone time to speak as he felt the disapproval radiate off your parents. “And if it would make you more comfortable, they don’t have to be together at my house anymore. At least not alone.” There was a long pause after Carlisle finished speaking, as if what he said compelled everyone to silence. Jasper gently squeezed your knee and glanced at you hopefully.

“I’ll agree that they continue to see each other, on the condition that they can only be alone together in public, or at our house, with the doors open, while we are home.” It might sound like a big ask, but Jasper knew how secretive and creative Edward was with Bella, and for someone so special to him, he was willing to try and be just as sneaky for you. The idea of sneaking into your bedroom late at night filled him with excitement, and he quickly thought of all the ways he could climb into your bed without your family noticing.

“I think we can agree to that,” Carlisle said with a wide smile and stood up to shake your father’s hand. Jasper smiled eagerly as he stood up, beckoning you to stand too, and wrapped you into a hug. Even if his skin was glacial, he still warmed your heart. You attempted to suppress your excited laugh as Jasper kissed your cheek.

“Hey,” your father called out disapprovingly, causing Jasper to loosen his grip around you.

“What?” you mused, “the doors are open?” Jasper tried to hide his smile in your hair as your parents let out a collective sigh.

“Don’t push it you two,” Carlisle said just loud enough for only you two to hear. He threw the two of you a knowing wink as he made his way back to the front door. Jasper smiled in a way you’d never seen before and slightly adjusted so his back was facing your parents. Gently, he leaned down to kiss you one more time. This time, he let his cold lips meet yours, and even if it was just for a second, you could feel every ounce of his love.

“See you soon, darlin’,” he said with a hushed sultry southern accent. Next time you two were together, he planned on continuing what you never got to finish.

pt. 1 of Twilight but they're in college because if I have to go through midterms, everyone else does, too.

I think canonically Rosalie studies medicine? and Emmett has never finished a degree lol but I disagree with all canonical information about their college degrees because I do NOT believe Edward finished medical school twice. I'm not even sure he knows how to read.

Emmett Cullen would never fully understand how truly strong he was. He didn’t when he was a human and he sure as shit didn’t now that he was a vampire. He did, however, understand very well just how fragile certain things were. He knew to be careful with certain things.

He knew to not break the glass samples Esme had of expensive tiling when handing them to her. He knew not to squeeze the screws cupped in his hand as he watched Rosalie work on a new vehicle. Even after many incidents ending in violence, Emmett was very careful with anything that belonged to Alice.

Most importantly, at least lately, he knew to be careful with Bella.

His little sister. Sweet, accepting, hilarious at times. Pregnant, but his brother, with a child that was quite literally feeding off her life force.

Before all of this, he’d been careful with the small brunette, of course. For Edward’s sake. Then eventually, he grew quite fond of the clumsy girl. Bella had a unique sense of humor and a perspective that his family lost long ago. She was a breath of fresh air. And it helped tremendously that her tendency to accidentally hurt herself was endlessly entertaining. He didn’t mind being more careful if it meant having Bella around more.

Jasper on the other hand, was really over-aware of his strength and of Bella delicacy. A touch too cautious, the blond vampire worried that a strong enough breath would blow the young woman over. Not that he wasn’t happy for his adopted brother, but Bella was a polite and courteous stream of never-ending anxiety for Jasper.

His fears proved valid as Bella’s stomach bulged and her face hallowed and her eyes lost their sparkle by the day. She truly looked as though a breath might take her out. In Jasper’s mind, Bella was an ancient and tragic painting who’s beauty was lost to the ages: He saw her mortality differently as her time dwindled down to the due date of the unborn child within her.

As such, the brothers had a hard time being around their sister-in-law. The looming threat of the shapeshifters gave them a good excuse to stay away, but she was never far from their thoughts. The whole situation was depressing, which Emmett had never really experienced and Jasper was all to eager to not have to deal with.

“I’m so thirsty,” Emmett mumbled from his perch. He sat in a tree in the south-east corner of the house, diligently watching the tree-line.

“So is everyone else, shut up and wait your turn,” Edward hissed, slapping another book closed, its information on hybrid children was useless.

“Edward,” Esme chided gently. “You and Alice will be going when Rosalie and your father come home. It’ll be good for her to get away for a moment.”

Alice hummed her appreciation around the headache her gift was causing her.

They all winced as Bella groaned at the baby shifting inside her. Jasper tried his hardest not to pay attention to the wet sucking sound of blood coming up the straw as Bella attempted to calm the child. He felt so useless. It was his job to protect this family and all of its members and yet everyone was starving, and his new sister was slowly but steadily wasting away before his very eyes. Jasper had never grieved a human like this before and she wasn’t even dead. Yet.

“Jazz, you alright man?” He hardly even clocked Emmett’s hulking frame as he joined him from his stance atop the roof.

“She barely joined our family, and all this…” Jasper didn’t finish his sentence but he knew Edward heard the words none of them dared speak aloud.

“All of you need to stop. The baby, and Bella, will be fine. She’s far from the first mother who’s had a complicated pregnancy,” Rosalie warned as she and Carlisle stealthily rejoined the family.

Jasper held his tongue and let himself be washed away in Bella’s relief and happiness to see Rosalie. He loved how positive she was despite everything she was going through. It made him marginally more hopeful.

“And it might help a bit to be a little less glum around her. You don’t think she picks up on it, but she does,” Rosalie added too quickly and quietly for Bella’s human ears to pick up on.

Emmett heaved a big sigh and began dragging Jasper towards where Bella was surrounded by a mountain of blankets and the fast talking space heater named Jacob.

“Hey Bella-bear, what’s shakin’?” Emmett greeted as merrily as he could manage. Bella smiled with blood-stained teeth and the skin sagged a bit spring her mouth, but she seemed happy enough to see them.

“He is, on my bladder,” Bella jokes, gesturing to her distended tummy. They all let out a small chuckle for her efforts and tried not to look at her mottled flesh.

“He? Are you that sure it’s a boy? Maybe it’ll be a little miss?” Jasper adds from the corner he’s standing in.

Bella flushes a pretty, almost healthy pink and cradles her belly lovingly. “Before I knew, I had dreams of a beautiful baby boy, I can’t see him any other way.”

Emmett grinned and clapped his hands together loudly. “I agree, maybe I’ll finally have a version of Edward that’s fun to play with.”

Jacob snickered from his spot at Bella’s side and gently avoided the elbow she threw into his ribs.

“So what? You think Rose will let you toss around Edward Junior? Yeah, right!” Jasper jested, coming forward to sit on the floor near Bella’s feet.

“Certainly not!” Rosalie confirmed, cradling Bella’s small frame away from Emmett.

“Wait. Is that seriously going to be his name? Edward Junior?” Jacob snorted.

Bella blushed with embarrassment and Jasper could practically see smoke coming out of Rosalie’s ears as she glared at Jacob.

“Actually,” Bella began softly, “I was thinking of you too. EJ. Edward Jacob.” She smiled at her stomach and they all knew she was quite attached to the name already.

“Lame.”

All their heads whipped to Emmett who was smirking with humor. No one else looked amused, with Rosalie looking almost murderously at her husband.

“Why give him the names of two wimps when you could use the names of his totally cool uncles. Emmett and Jazz-man? See? It fits so much better,” Emmett reasoned as if talking to a child.

“I’m not naming my son ‘Jazz-man’,” Bella refused. Jasper nodded in agreement form the floor.

“Yes, I concur. Jasper is a fine name for a man without you butchering it.”

Emmett gasped in shock and held a hand to his chest mockingly. “I put so much effort into creating a namesake and this is the thanks I get? For shame, family, for shame.”

Bella giggled lightly at his antics and they all collectively smiled at her good mood. Jasper felt the baby’s happiness at hearing Bella’s laugh and felt his whole being shift into a lighter atmosphere.

He reached out to Bella and silently offered to read the baby. Her eyes gleamed in delight and she nodded eagerly, watching her stomach as if she could somehow see her son.

Her belly was almost as cool as his skin and significantly harder than a normal human’s, but Jasper still felt the hum of life within. He leaned in close so that the boy could hear him, too.

“How does it sound, Edward Jacob? You like it?” Jasper shared a feeling of brief amusement followed by rejection to everyone in the room and they all laughed along with the baby.

“See? He likes Emmett Jasper wayyyy better, Bells!” Emmett exclaimed heartily. The baby was feeling something that felt like laughter and Jasper could almost clearly imagine the cherub cheeked smile that matched Bella’s giggling along.

Bella shook her head while chuckling, the precious sound echoing in the large house.

“It is more modern,” Rosalie conceded to everyone’s surprise. “And the baby seems to like it.”

“He likes hearing Bella laugh,” Jasper corrected, picking up on the baby’s delight.

“And she laughs at you two doing stupid shit. Emmett Jasper is the perfect name for him,” Rosalie argued.

“How about we all just call him EJ and make a schedule? He can be Emmett Jasper every other week?” Esme suggested jokingly.

Emmett shook his head. “Absolutely not. Emmett Jasper or bust!”

He dramatically kneeled at Bella’s feet, clasping her small hand his humongous one. “Please, Bella, if you love your big brothers, you’ll do us the honor of giving your son a much cooler name.”

Emmett threw an arm around Jasper’s shoulder and pouted stupidly at the mahogany-haired girl. Jasper very pointedly does not pout, but he had to admit it himself that it would be nice to have his nephew named after him. He smiled encouragingly at Bella.

Said girl was watching the ceiling with humor, unable to believe the turn her evening took.

Smiling widely enough to dazzle, she agreed, “Fine. Baby Cullen will henceforth be known as EJ, Emmett Jasper.”

can we all agree that if emmett and jasper weren’t so depressed about bella drinking all the blood in the house, they would have convinced her that ej was a great name for a boy but it should stand for emmett jasper not edward jacob.

Horizon (Twilight Saga AU)

God, I completely changed everything.

Chapters Pending

Things I changed from the original so y'all can decide if y'all wanna read it:

Bella is a lot more...energetic (eccentric) and interesting (insane) in my version. (this entire version was heavily inspired by @divyasoup 's twilight meme of Bella in place of IASIP!Charlie in front of the conspiracy board. it was beautiful)

Her and Rosalie have much better relationship, it's more defender/defendee. They bond over the fact that Rosalie has always wanted a child and Bella never was one (I love Charlie, but him and Renee spent the entirety of Bella's childhood treating her like an adult) (also I need to clarify that Rosalie does not treat Bella like a child because Bella is not a child. She simply is always on Bella's side and tries to take care of her. Bella has canonically always wanted someone to actually take care of her.)

HEAR ME OUT HOTTAKE: Instead of Edward, Bella will be paired with Jasper. And their trope with be tolerant frenemies- to friends - to lovers.

Jacob and Bella are chaotic!elder sister and annoying little brother. There will be no dumbass, inane love triangle. The tribe's stories are taken seriously and Jacob knows he's the future alpha. Charlie and Bella are aware of the tribal laws and stories.

The Cullens pay "mortgage" to the rez in exchange for the wolves allowing them to live in Forks. This funds schools, hospitals, and recreational facilities. They aren't close though.

Emmett goes nuts about Bella (chaos twins is a recurring theme because it's my favorite headcanon)

ANYWAYS, my retelling is funny, and emotional and I think it'll be enjoyable for a pretty niche audience.

Emmett Cullen as a Boyfriend

Once he’s committed, that’s it. He’s locked in and doesn’t even notice other women in any way. 

He loves physical affection. 

Expect a lot of hugs, cuddles, affectionate touches, and his lifting or carrying you around. 

He is a classic adrenaline junkie. He wants to go on adventures with you and do a bunch of fun outrageous activities. 

He is naturally an uplifting, positive person, you cannot be in a bad mood when he’s around. 

He celebrates your wins like they’ve his own. He’ll shout and cheer no matter how small the victory. 

He’s a little possessive if others approach you but he has complete trust in you. 

Over the top gifts.

"I love you, but I'm not letting you buy me a car."

Constant teasing.

When you go to the gym, he goes with you even though it doesn't do anything for him. He just wants to spend more time with you.

"Hey can I borrow your hoodie?" "Sure, why?" "That guy keeps looking over and I need a pump cover." "You don't need it, I got you."

Proceeds to stand right behind you during squats, staring at the guy.

"Drink water, you're gonna pass out."

Even though he’s a big, strong man, he has absolutely no issues in loving you loudly. 

He will always compliment you and make sure people know you’re his. 

“That’s my girl.” 

“Damn, that’s hot.” 

“You are so damn gorgeous.” 

Who keeps letting Carlisle watch Greys Anatomy??

A very happy holidays to everyone and especially to my lovely secret santa, @cudan2 !!! This is my take on some of your adorable headcanons and I hope you love it <3333

@twilight-secret-gift-exchange thanks for arranging this :)

POV you walk into the forks high school cafeteria 😎😎

halloween edition twilight yeah baby 🎃🎃🎃💖💖💗❤️‍🔥💓💓 rose and em as barbie and ken because of course

I never finished this, but here are some slumber party Cullens!

Effervescent ✨✨🐌🐌

I saw this sweater on an instagram ad and I knew it was absolutely perfect for our Eddie

Bonus:

Rosalie!!!

because today’s my birthday and I can do what I want ❤️❤️❤️

some pretty princess cullens 💕✨💖👑

(Emmett in a dress finally I know I know)

support my art :)

Esme wip ✨💛🧚🏼‍♀️😌 i love her

Rose and bebe 😢😢😢😢 it’s what she deserves

bells 💗💘✨❤️🥰

support my art!

Rose and Em!

definitely NOT art for the Renaissance... 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️ zoom in for sparkles

The Cullen kids fave artists/genre

Edward: His is probably the easiest because liking classical music is so Edward. He’s the most pretentious vampire I’ve ever seen and would absolutely play Du Bist Die Ruh then get shocked when no one else is into it. I think he also would enjoy Mitski, Paul Anka, and artists with a calmer sound

Bella: I know Smeyer wrote that Bella doesn’t really listen to music but no. She would love 70s music. ABBA, Glen Campbell, Elton John, etc. But her favorite would be Kate Bush (i know shes 80s but shh) for girlboss reasons. I think she’d also enjoy east coast rap.

Alice: Waterparks, My Chemical Romance, Rob Zombie, Chloe Moriondo, artists like that. She’s got a pink shoes black socks vibe, y’know? Her and Edwards music tastes are complete opposites and ALice would try her best to keep up with new music because she wants to support artists that are actually alive and need the money. (Full shade to Edward.)

Emmett: EDM beep boop wowowow music that no one else enjoys. Like dubstep electronic construction sound music so Food House, 100 Gecs (I’ so sorry but it’s true.) and Fraxiom. But also lots of like early 2000′s pop (im thinking Taio Cruz, Pitbull type stuff.)

Jasper: Yeehaw giddy up honky tonk whewww doggy. Luke Bryan is his idol. He kisses his Dolly Parton poster before bed every night then lays there and tells her about his day while cuddling a Johnny Cash body pillow that lays between him and Alice each night (which is fine because Alice has a Hanayo Koizumi cardboard cutout she also needs to sleep next to.)

Rosalie: Sir Chloe, Florence + The Machine, Zeph, Kehlani, any girlboss musician. she rarely listens to male artists and no i am not projecting so dont even. she’s the reason im making this bc i was listening to Femme Fatale by Sir Chloe and had an epiphany. Rosalie is so emotionally constipated that only a starry eyed himbo could get to her heart so look me in the eyes and say she wouldn’t lose her mind over Zeph’s demo ‘Brave Enough’ ??? yeah sure buddy she TOTALLY doesn’t get stabby. 

The Cullens but if they used tiktok lol

-Alice would absolutely use Tiktok frequently and force the other cullens to make accounts

-That being said, Alice would post lots, LOTS, of tiktoks and participate in fun little trends. At first bitch baby Edward was like “Don’t you’ll expose us” but then realized that they can explain any suspicion away with filters.

-She also very actively plays Roblox horror games and gets accused of hacking. 

-Edward makes emo Simpsons edits+edgy povs. you wanna pretend this skinny illinois whiteboy wouldnt sHE beLIEveD every fucking caption? 

-Edward’s pov character is a wizard named Flame of war. He is a mob boss/patriot/single father looking for love in a dark, unaccepting world. 

-Rosalie has tons of followers, she posts short videos of her lipsyncing or just fit checks for funsies. Otherwise, she wouldn’t really have any interest in social media. 

-Bella doesn’t post, but her fyp is the funniest, edward keeps trying to get her to duet his povs.

-Emmett most definetly makes gym vids and bf pov/thirst traps. all of the comments are either asking if he does steroids or about his massive mommy milkerz

-Carlisle doesn’t post, but he follows all the doctors of tiktok in solidarity and comments things like “nice!” or “awesome info!” or “this is not correct. delete.”

-Jasper only likes and comments on Alice’s videos, but his comments are just like the thumbs up emoji or a smiley face, he once tried to post but the vid got taken down for the confederate flag in the back. 

-Esme doesnt have tiktok because i love her too much and dont want that for her. Neither does Renesmee bc she’s a dumb fucking baby and I hate her.

-Jacob got banned from social media for being a literal child predator.

🏆 This is the Amazing Person Award 🏆 ✨💛 Once you are given this award you are supposed to paste it in the ask of eight different people, who, in your opinion, deserve it. If you break the chain nothing will happen, but it is sweet to know someone thinks you're amazing inside and out 💛

Hopefully I didn't send this twice (':

Awww thank you!! and you didn't, don't worry!!

a gift :D

Star's Kinkvember list!!

requests are open babies!! This list is not finalized, things can change, send me a request if you'd like to see a certain kink with a certain special someone.

side note: these are for November, cause i wanted to October, but I'm late

TAG TIME: @harmshake @spookybitchdreams @thickbihhwitdagapp @urasunflower @whatdoeseverybodywant @lilucey @jstarr86

reply in the comments if you wanna be added to my taglist

how to request a kinkvember: send in an ask with a day, and a character. REMEMBER, these are only x reader.

Day 1: Oral sex; pairing (Jimmy Uso x reader) Day 2:bondage; pairing (Tama Tonga x reader)

Day 3: Spanking; pairing (Jey Uso x reader)

Day 4: Hair pulling; pairing (Damian Priest x reader)

day 5: Dirty talk; Pairing (Jey Uso x reader)

day 6: Blindfolds; pairing (Tyler Lockwood x reader)

day 7: toys; pairing (Jey uso x reader)

day 8:Lingerie; Pairing (Drew McIntyre x reader)

day 9: breast/ Nipple play; Pairing (Ludwig Kaiser x reader)

day 10:Handcuffs; pairing (Roman reigns x reader)

day 11: Biting; Pairing (Solo Sikoa x reader)

day 12: Discipline; pairing (Baron Corbin x reader)

day 13: Sex in public; pairing (Paul lahote x reader)

day 14:Mutual masturbation; pairing (Tama Tonga x reader)

day 15: collar and Lead; pairing (Damon Salvatore x reader)

day 16:Masturbation;pairing (Cody Rhodes x reader)

day 17: Candle wax; pairing (Tama tonga x reader)

day 18:Rough sex; pairing (Emmett Cullen x reader)

Day 19: threesome; pairing (Jey Uso x reader x Damian Priest)

Day 20: face fucking; pairing (Rafe Cameron x reader)

Day 21: Domination; pairing (Tonga loa x reader)

Day 22: Vibrators; pairing (tama tonga x reader)

Day 23: Strap on; pairing (Rhea Ripley x reader)

day 24: Voyuerism; pairing (Damian Priest x reader)

Day 25: High heels; pairing (Roman reigns x reader)

Day 26: Cunnilingus; pairing (Tonga Loa x reader) Day 27: Squirting;pairing (Tama tonga x reader)

Day 28: Praising;Pairing (Simon Basset x reader)

day 29:Aftercare;pairing (Tonga Loa x reader)

Day 30: Choking; Pairing (Baron Corbin x reader)

Extra: Choking and mutual masturbation (Montgomery de la Cruz x reader)

Small reminder!!: any that say unknown are open to request, these will be FULL ONESHOTS, not blurbs!!

the characters open for this are:

Anyone on this list <3

Thats all my loves <3. Requests are ALWAYS OPEN. And you can always chat with me. Mwah <3

Sighhh~

Being into all these men, women and animatronics is difficult. My expectations are so high that I believe them to be unrealistic at this point.

Some tags I couldn't add;

◇ Brie's submission book characters:

Thane Davis, Anton Durov, Brad Anderson, Marquis Gray, Ren Nosaka.

Vampire the Masquerade: Twilight

I'm going to do one sinful thing and do a VTM/Twilight crossover, but after Cookie Run and Winx Club, I don't find it that surprising anymore. Sorry for my bad English in advance.

In fact, I'm surprised that only few people have noticed the similarities between the two at all – and as someone who has obsessed over Twilight since childhood and developed an obsession with VTM a year ago, I can say that there are literally entire tropes in Twilight that leave the impression that Stephenie Meyer directly copied them from Revised rulebook.

Or, perhaps, she just didn’t like looking for the sarcophagus, which is... valid (Twilight came out in October 5, 2005 and VTMB in November 16, 2004).

But all jokes aside, I think adapting Twilight into a TTRPG would be really interesting because I would die to read a fanfic with that crossover (or maybe I'll just have to write it myself 🥲). But before I start assigning characters to clans, I need to address a few things:

⏳ The setting of Twilight is those same weird times of Thin Blood that the Camarilla Elders were so afraid of (and, as it turns out, for a good reason 💀), where Kindred aren't afraid of the sun or at least aren't as affected by it, and the power over the world of vampires was seized by the Italian mafia. It would be funny to simply assign the Volturi to the Giovanni clan, but all the characters from there would fit perfectly into other clans, so let’s take it that in this universe the concepts of «clan» and «sect» have merged together.

👑 Speaking of which: the Volturi are clearly the local equivalent of the Camarilla. I joked above that Meyer’s inspirational guide to her world of vampires was the Revised rulebook, but I am quite seriously convinced that at least she must have heard the word «Masquerade» somewhere – otherwise, I don’t see where else this similarity came from. An elitist, corrupt ruling community of old vampire farts who are (literally) petrified with time, where not everyone can get, and who make a living by imposing immutable laws (Traditions) and enforcing strict punishments for non-compliance. Or maybe I'm just delusional...

🏴 All the other «clans» (in Twilight that's a group of vampires who, for whatever reasons, decide to stick together and have a more or less publicly open life, but a more appropriate term would be coterie), such as the Cullens or Denali, are, firstly, doomed to nomadism, since they cannot afford permanent protection as in Volterra, and, secondly, they are local Anarchs. But not the kind of Anarch Kindred of Downtown LA (Nines would be disappointed in them), but rather as an Oligarchy of Anarch Barons, like in Hollywood. They don't have the balls to openly tell the Volturilla and their laws to hell, but they preserve the Masquerade strictly, even to the point of organized combat campaigns, as it was in the end of Eclipse.

🩸 Now, packs like James's clan are obvious remnants of the Sabbat. Unlike the local Anarchs, they wander constantly without settling anywhere, even for a short time, and don't even care about the Masquerade, taking people away from them only in cases of extreme necessity. They are absolutely not concerned about the secrecy of their crimes, their level of humanity is much below average, which they, however, don't worry about, since they completely devote themselves to the Beast.

Also! There's a thing about the soul. In Twilight, the general consensus among vampires is that they don't have one. All those who somehow spoke out on this matter (Aro, Edward, Carlisle) claimed that they were soulless monsters, doomed to Hell, driven only by bloodthirsty instincts. I've heard something similar before... only in VTM it is called the Beast.

So, let's begin.

I. We'll start with the most obvious example, that not only fits perfectly with the description of one entire clan in VTM, but also helps define other characters within the Cullen family. Edward is an obvious Toreador.

And when I say obvious, I mean not only his personality (the archetype of the self-righteous tragic hero-lover with a penchant for art and beautiful suffering, is, in general, the whole essence of the Toreador clan), but also the Disciplines that he showed in books and films, as well as his motives for behaving and acting as he did.

For starters, the fact that Edward is just about the fastest vampire we know of in Twilight is the most direct demonstration of Celerity. His token ability – mind reading – is nothing more than an Auspex (I can't guess the dots with certainty, but he clearly has about 4-5), and in the first film, in the scene where Bella was being harassed by a group of thugs (but to be fair, in the book he just beat them), he actually used what is very clearly depicted as Presence: spreading his aura of menace over a group of people, making them afraid.

He just fits perfectly with the Toreador in terms of abilities, and his personality only confirms this. As I said, Edward is a typical representative of the clan (and I’m not very happy about it since I myself play for the Toreadors and this is my fave clan... 😬), simply because... well, I assume everybody remembers how he behaved? This craving for suffering, idiotic sacrifices in the name of love, manipulation of the feelings of people who depend on him (and resisting the charm of a vampire, especially a Toreador, is a task where any human NPC almost automatically has a losing roll), and, consciously or not, creating conditions for even more drama and complication of everything around. This man is a nightmare to live with, honestly – especially when you realize that he usually manages to get everything his way because of his supernatural charisma, while we, the readers, are well aware that he actually thinks like every other teenage incel you may encounter at your school. He concentrates very heavily on the feelings and specifically love, while at the same time remaining incredibly vain: at first Bella attracted him only because he wanted to rip her throat with his teeth couldn't get through her thoughts, so this allowed him to imagine that she was all so mysterious and «not like other girls» (as he was sincerely repelled by the horny thoughts of his classmates; little did he know that Bella was no different from them). Let's not forget the concerns for his own virtue and mourning for his lost soul and humanity – very strong words for someone who had no problem putting Bella and the people around her in danger many times and then pretending he didn't see it coming (to be fair for the sake of it, if his actions fully correlate with a 17-year-old boy, then his mental development must be as well; he's selfish as one, too). And last but not least – his pretentiousness, which sometimes made me feel cringe: his every compliment to Bella, the language that he uses (no, he's not that old of a vampire and he's very much aware of young people slang) and notorious teary pauses in sentences. If Robert Pattinson was given the task of playing a textbook Toreador, then he did it 100%

II. In VTM the clan is passed down from Sire to Childe: if a Sire belongs to a clan, then his Childer will automatically inherit it. The opposite is also true – if the Childe's clan is reliably known, then so is the Sire's. What I mean is that Carlisle is also a Toreador, and one that fits those same stereotypes too.

We don't know anything about the level of his Disciplines – I'll just assume that he wasn't as focused on developing them as Edward – and he doesn't have a special gift. He has what was described in the books as «supernatural compassion» that allowed him to more easily tolerate a diet of animal blood, but this doesn't really indicate anything other than that he just has a large Willpower pool. We do, however, know why Carlisle sticks to his principles, teaches them to other vampires, and his personality as such.

For starters: his aura of holiness is nothing more than dust in the eyes from Stephenie Meyer; for example, he had no moral concerns about his constant presence in Forks attracting vampires to the area, causing the local Tribe to suffer a rapidly growing numbers of shape-shifters. He has done many things – from financial fraud to intervention in the lives of entire communities, human and otherwise – that are questionable at best, but what does he feel the most remorse for? Ah yes – for the fact that once three hundred years ago he used to feed on human blood. Why? Because it makes him feel bad about himself and ruins his holier-than-thou image. Remember all these talks about «going to hell» and «being damned»? It was Carlisle who put this idea into Edward's mind. Nevertheless, the entire family considers their patriarch to be the epitome of humility and a role model... for just being self-aware. Do you really think he doesn't know about it? Even Bella told him this directly in New Moon.

I'm not trying to say here that Carlisle is a terrible person. I'm trying to say that he clearly can tell right from wrong, while also really believing that he and his family – in which no one really cares as much about morality or values human life as he thinks he does – are really good guys, by turning a blind eye on everything inconvenient. Very Toreador to me.

Also he's fascinated by the classic art even more than Edward, but this may be just the influence of Volturi, idk.

III. Esme is another Carlisle's Childe, and therefore is also automatically a Toreador.

Like Carlisle, she doesn't actually have any special powers – but she does have what was described in the books as «extreme passion» and «ability to warmly and passionately love the people around her» (you get this). The interesting thing is that she and Carlisle were the original Bella and Edward: Carlisle turned the dying Esme into a vampire for the sake of eternal love. I swear, with the way Sires were banned from having relationships with their Childer in V5, the Toreador clan will just leave the Camarilla in a minute.

IV. Let's take a short break from the Toreadors and identify everyone's favorite manic pixie dream girl – Alice.

She is an obvious Malkavian with her gift of seeing the future and general eccentricity, there is no question about it. Interestingly enough, her Sire was an unknown vampire psychiatrist from the mental hospital where Alice was placed by her parents, and who turned her after she had a vision of encountering James (Mr Grout?..)

V. Now back to hell – Rosalie, another's Carlisle's Childe, is also a Toreador (I mean, come on, even her name is a hint to «the Clan of the Rose»).

There is an interesting detail in her story (which is perhaps one of the most tragic in the family) that none of the Cullens can boast of. She had never tasted human blood, never. Even Bella tried it, although when she was still human; Rosalie never drank it, even when she killed her rapists. She does this with back-breaking work, and perhaps her level of humanity is one of the highest in the family, but what is interesting here is how her Toreadorism manifests itself in her particular case.

She doesn't drink human blood not because she values human life, but because it's her way of showing her superior humanity in the family – over Carlisle and over Edward, the ones who claim to care the most. Rosalie, on the contrary, doesn’t care about people at all – she multiple times stated it, and even directly told Bella about this in Eclipse. Well, at least she's honest about it.

Rosalie, like all the other Cullens, only pretends that human lives are important to her, and even then, she does it reluctantly – which is why Edward doesn't think highly of her. Maybe it only seemed to me, but I noticed that Edward has some kind of envy towards her on the basis of «humanity points», because she has an advantage over him and she knows about it; however, I can’t even say with certainty whether Edward likes anyone in his family at all, except Carlisle.

Rosalie, following the good tradition of the Toreador clan, puts love at the forefront, and her main unfulfilled dream is a real family, including children, grandchildren and aging. Vampire life, however, dictates other conditions: it's easier to survive in clans, especially in those where there are gifted vampires (even if they're not her closest friends). It was for this reason that she agreed to take care of Bella when she became pregnant – not because Rosalie suddenly warmed up to her, but because it would give her the opportunity to nurse the baby she herself had longed for.

Again, the things Rosalie does to stay morally pure – refusing to drink human blood and relying on her moral superiority over this – don't make her truly merciful and compassionate, as Carlisle might want her to be: even if Rosalie didn't Embrace Emmett herself, she was selfish enough to carry him miles to Carlisle and beg to turn him so she could have forever love with him. Putting her wishes first, even knowing the hellish pain that transformation brings, and so deciding to pass the responsibility onto someone else... yes, that is a true Kindred.

VI. We're done with simple examples, and now let's move on to those where I hesitated about a clear answer. Emmett Cullen, being the Childe of Carlisle, should also naturally be a Toreador, but he obviously doesn't feel like one, unlike everyone else (with the exception of Alice).

I understand that, at least externally, the Brujah clan would suit him better than anyone else, but the fact that Toreadors cannot be strong warriors is nothing more than a stereotype. No, of course, the most often played out Toreador archetype is a dude who's hobbies consist of hanging late Baroque paintings in the house with records of Italian operetta in the background, but this is not all that art is limited to. Someone once said that a Toreador martial artist is more to be feared than a Gangrel or even a Banu Haqim. Emmett, as he was shown in books and films, always votes for a fight; this could have passed for Brujah clan compulsion if not for his competitive streak. I understand, it’s very far-fetched, but I think it fits. Also the closest example of the power that a Toreador admiring the art of fighting can possess would be Sheriff Qadir al-Asmai from CoNY and SoNY.

VII. An even more confusing example is Jasper Hale. Initially, I thought of adding him to the Toreadors, like all the rest, since the Internet agreed with me: he was Embraced because of his appearance and he possess special talent that clearly resembles Presence, but my personal guess would be Brujah. Yeah, him – not Emmett.

As a soldier, he was chosen by his Sire, Maria, specifically as a fighting unit that would train newborns like himself, and then kill them when they were no longer needed. His whole life was consisting of fightings – and not to say for a just cause (during his lifetime he was a Confederate💀)

But okay, a vampire’s backstory can be anything and it doesn’t depend or correlate with the clan, so what made me think that he is a Brujah? Firstly, they also have Presence. Secondly: his strength and skill in battle can, debatable, but be justified by Potence. And thirdly: the way he behaves. The way I see it, Jasper can't help but constantly fail his Franzy checks, because... this is just a Brujah clan curse.

Over time, of course, he gains more and more Willpower and adapts to an animal diet, but he finally calms down, it seems, only when Bella herself becomes a vampire: that is, the source of provocation (her exceptionally fragrant blood + debilitating vegetarian diet) stops looming before his nose.

VIII. So, the last member of the clan. Bella's case touches on a lot of themes, such as generation and the level of humanity of the Cullens, and when vacillating between a regular Toreador like Edward and a Thinblood, I chose Thinblood because Ratatouille's birth helped me with that.

First of all: Rodimus for sure is a Dhampir (but Stephenie Meyer avoided the word for some reason, preferring «hybrid» instead 🤨). The existence of these half-bloods in VTM is an existing fact as well as in the Twilight canon. They appear when one of the parents is specifically a Thinblood and the other is human, and have some unique traits that Kindred have (a blood pool or the ability to learn some Disciplines), but aren't immortal and can't Embrace or create ghouls.

With all that said, if Edward could impregnate Bella, why didn't I assign him to Thinbloods, but to a regular Toreador? Because, let's be clear once again: the world of Twilight as a whole is the Time of Thin Blood, because it's the only possibility for Kindred to adapt to being under the sun and at the same time retain vampiric traits, such as immortality and some superpowers. This can explain why not everyone here masters the Disciplines, but only specific lucky individuals who retain the ability to develop them – it may be, or may be not, due to the phenomenon of Blood thickening, that lowers one's generation (and doesn't happen to everyone).

Would it be interesting if I simply wrote down absolutely all the vampires from Twilight as Thinbloods? No – for exactly this reason, I'm going to make a second part about the Volturi, where I'll sort them into clans, instead of just slapping the Giovanni label on them all.

So how did it happen then that Edward is not a Thinblood, but Bella is? Well, perhaps his blood is still in the process of thickening, which will lower his generation eventually: Carlisle, as I understand it, is a 13th generation Kindred, which makes all of his Childer 14th. In previous editions of VTM, the 14th generation was considered Thin-Blooded, who still had the ability to Embrace, but 15th didn't. Interesting that in the Dark Ages the 13th generation was also considered Thin-Blooded, and they also couldn't reproduce and create blood bonds, however, over time, their blood thickened and now they're considered absolutely normal Kindred that can do all those things. The same thing happened around 2010-s in the VTM timeline: now the 14th generation are full-fledged Kindred. The problem with the 15th generation is that there's more of them appearing than the blood has time to thicken.

For this reason, I see Edward as a vampire who, during Twilight, was in a period of life where his generation was gradually lowering, which allowed him to have a child with Bella in the moment, but is unlikely to allow him with any other human woman in another 100 years or so.

There is no definite answer as to why the blood thickens or weakens in the first place, other than the ghostly vague narrative tool that is Gehenna. I can only assume that, just as the increasing number of bloodsuckers in the werewolf territory triggers a gene in some of them, forcing more and more of them to shape-shift, some other processes help the Twilight vampires become stronger every day (Bella's gift, which I sincerely can't tie to any Discipline, except for some transcendental level of Presence, could develop so quickly precisely because her blood thickens very quickly and her generation from 15th is already shifting to 14th).

She was Embraced, however, as a Thinblood – just like Edward, with the only difference that he was Embraced at a time when the 14th generation was still considered Thinbloods.

(I use the word «blood» here because it's still a crossover with VTM, and also because the «venom is the only substance in a vampire’s stone body» thing still annoys me)

The only exceptions to this are Jasper and Alice, since they were not embraced by Carlisle: we don't know their generations.

Just like we don't know the level of humanity of each of the Cullens: I would argue that Bella currently has the highest if measured from an objective point of view (just because she's the youngest), but in V5 we no longer have a concept of «humanity» as something definitive. Now it's rather the Kindred’s assessment of their actions with their internal moral code – which is why Edward, with all his feigned self-flagellation about his murders in the past, actually remains a vampire with a fairly high humanity and passes perfectly as a regular normal human, albeit pale.

Same thing with the rest of the Cullens.

***

With all that being said, I believe that the crossover with VTM is a kind of filter – an opportunity to expose all of Twilight's flaws and use them as something interesting, an addition to the universe, make them something that can be used as part of a story about monsters, rather than something to shy away from and choose to turn a blind eye to.

Be you a monster who has renounced everything human and decided to give yourself to the Beast wholeheartedly, like James's clan, or a Kindred who has hopped on the path of enlightenment, deciding to reject all worldliness and find a greater meaning in your existence, beyond the simple blood-sucking curse and everything around you, like Volturi, or decide to delude yourself so much that at some point you really believe that you're still pretty much like humans and even try to adhere to all the virtues that are only available to you in conditions of constant moral compromises, like Cullens – none of you really are good guys. There's no such thing in VTM, and that's why I love it so much.

But of course, Stephenie Meyer just couldn't acknowledge the fact that her precious sparkly creations aren't actually good people – otherwise that would made Twilight something more than a teenage romance, god forbid.

Thanks for coming to my Ted Talk.