Eating Is So Hard I Have Lost All Interest In Everything. If I Am Not Busy I Am Empty.

expressing our feelings? nah i’m just gonna eat them instead and then puke everywhere bc i shouldn’t be eating and then do it again

i’m sorry i didn’t write to you yesterday. i’ve been busy with recording. i get a new microphone tomorrow.

i want to record more of my older songs but i’m scared to because so many of them are so emotional and clouded. i write music to release that negativity inside of me and i can be vulnerable with myself for a bit. my views have changed now but i still feel like those songs are a part of me.

i’m eating dinner now. i had a rough day at work. it was really busy. i’m watching old among us videos.

i don’t have much to say. not much in my life is changing right now. i’m glad.

i miss you. i don’t ever want to talk to you again but i wish i had the chance to say goodbye.

i don’t know how tumblr works help

i miss you.

and i miss you.

and i miss you.

and i miss you.

and i miss you.

and i miss you.

and i miss you.

and i miss you.

and i miss you.

and then i lay back down and drown the world out.

me: gets pulled over

officer: license and registration?

me: hands it to them

officer: here’s ur ticket

me: but officer, isn’t there anything i can do to make u forget about this?

officer: pulls out handcuffs

me: oh okay

officer: ur under arrest for bribing a law enforcement officer

i wake up. i take my pills. i listen to your playlist in the car. i drive to work. i blink and hours have past. i go home. i kiss him and cook with him and sleep with him and i pretend. i pretend i’m not as lonely as i am.

the only reason my favourite animal is the dunkleosteus is because of the game hungry shark where they called it “big daddy”

this feeling is fucking eating me alive. i miss you. i feel awful about it. i love cole more than anything but idk what to do abt you. you’re just so. idk. you asked me why i liked you and if that would change if you were someone else. the answer is no. i wish there were a way i could have you both but even that seems off. i keep bringing you up or tweeting or making jokes and i can tell it’s getting to him. i don’t want that. idk why i’m like this. i’m a mess.

i hate you for making me feel again

me writing is just me fucking around for several hours making the characters be gay n shit and then deleting it all and writing decent shit for a couple minutes