NO SUNDAY YOURE NOT JUST DEHYDRATED THIS TIME YOURE ASCENDING TO GODHOOD

The Jester in the Mirror

You are the loudest laugh in the quietest room. You tell stories, make jokes, and keep the energy up because if you stop, you'll hear the echo of your own loneliness. You've made yourself the entertainer to avoid ever being the burden. You've turned pain into punchlines-each laugh you earn a little paper shield. But it's getting heavier, isn't it? You don't remember the last time someone asked how you were and really meant it. You're terrified that if you drop the act, there's nothing underneath. But there is. You just forgot how to let it show.

My god my girlies

MY GIRLIES. I am still crying, I am still crying about this. Every day I cry about this.

You bitched so hard about being forced to read 1984 in school when it’s so problematic (tm)

Maybe you should have actually paid attention when you read it

Because all these AI fics

You are LITERALLY MAKING THE GARBAGE NOVELS FROM 1984 that are written by machines

You have literally recreated the worthless soulless machine-made books

Literally,

Literally. Every once in a while it hits me in a fresh wave of disbelief and anger. You have literally created the dystopian book from the dystopian story about why dystopia is bad, and you are passing it around like it’s this amazing thing. I’m crying, I’m crying.

Well now we have ozone layer subliminal message snail rainbows that make you think you’re a snail so hard you turn yourself into one

I think one of the biggest reasons I enjoy jjba is because I envy this level of confidence and sincerity in storytelling. See, I would not have just said something as fucking stupid as "bullet-deflecting oil." I would've come up with some kind of Watsonian bullshit magic-science explanation that at least squared with the logic of the story instead of just saying "Oh, it's an oil that deflects bullets" and moving on to the next thing. But that is not because I am a better storyteller, no, quite the opposite. It's because I'm a coward.

FOOD DISCOURSE: reblog with ur opinions on guacamole, olives, mango, hummus, tomatoes, and cannolis

drink water

Every morning for breakfast I eat the goop I can get you a recipe if you want it has like 69 protein and 300 calories

they should make a meal that appears whenever you want to eat it and it doesn't take effort to make and is nutritious and filling and it never goes bad if you leave it in your fridge for a long time and never gets too dry or soggy or otherwise textureweird if you eat slowly and when you're done it automatically cleans off the plate so you don't have to do the dishes and also it should be free

Reblogging this manually. Op doesn't want credit for fear of being terminated.

I AM UNEMPLOYABLE