therealestmallet
18 | They/Them | I like to collect Shiny Things
172 posts
Latest Posts by therealestmallet
The Jester in the Mirror
You are the loudest laugh in the quietest room. You tell stories, make jokes, and keep the energy up because if you stop, you'll hear the echo of your own loneliness. You've made yourself the entertainer to avoid ever being the burden. You've turned pain into punchlines-each laugh you earn a little paper shield. But it's getting heavier, isn't it? You don't remember the last time someone asked how you were and really meant it. You're terrified that if you drop the act, there's nothing underneath. But there is. You just forgot how to let it show.
i need feminism because when jesus does a magic trick it’s a goddamn miracle but when a woman does a magic trick she gets burned at the stake
Do you have a favorite underrated character that you believe has traits that make them a potential sexyman?
Do multiple of the following traits described here apply to him?:
1.) Evil/Morally grey
2.) A very well-dressed individual
3.) Non human traits
4.) Very... Y'know 💅✨️
5.) Have a tragic and/or mysterious backstory
6.) A Dilf/Gilf
7.) A twink
8.) Very Powerful
9.) A chaoslord
10.) Maybe even... a subversion of traits: 1, 2, 5, 7, 8 or 9?
Well, my friend, Your Blorbo may be a potential sexyman!
Why am I asking this?
I'm hosting.
✨️🌹 The Official Unoffical Tumblr Sexyman Underdog Vote 🌹✨️
Every lesser known "baby girl" has a chance for fame!
That's right, a vote for your beloved pookie, where he won't be pit against one of the already infamous sexymen and have a fair fighting chance!
Once there is enough talk about the vote (at least 100 followers and 1000 at the most), the google forum will be posted where you can submit your beloved into the brawl!
Hope to see you all soon!
>censors all existing data on trans healthcare
>orders a study
I'm sure this will be completely unbiased
my name is normal cisgender and you can hire me
Jesus, after coming back from the dead: hey guys it’s me Jesus, just look at the scars on my hands
Thomas, a known freak: show us the feet as well please
Other people's emotions are deep and complex and beautiful but mine are proof that there is rot at the core of my being
Imagine you’re in like the world war 1 trenches and you see something in the sky falling like a parachute and people don’t shoot at it but they like get away and it lands and someone behind screams like “SHIT THEY DEPLOYED THE GORILLA” and like you turn around and there’s just like a 800 pound silverback gorilla going like ape mode and like killing people and smashing shit and ripping stuff apart and like they turn the machine gun on it but it just storms the nest because it’s got like gorilla proportionate body armor and it just grabs the gun and snaps it and like you survive and go home and kids are like “what was the war like uncle” and you have to tell them they just dropped gorillas on you when there was no more gas
The fact that there's an actually functional website for the library of Babel is one of those things that fucks me up more and more the more I think about the implications.
Same.
quiz enjoyers! i am now inviting you to come create something in my workshop❕
I love you big women. I love you big men. I love you big nonbinary people. You’re all very beautiful and pretty and handsome and hot and sexy and cute and adorable and cool and smart and interesting. I hope you all have good days and nights and love yourselves and know other people love you a lot.
if i had to end the simpsons the final episode would be completely bereft of dialogue, cutting between character's houses, they're sitting silently in their comfortable spaces, at peace. over the course of the next 23 minutes we see every inhabitant of springfield slowly wither and turn to dust, open windows allowing them to be carried away on a light breeze. sometimes it seems painful, others joyful, but in the end nothing remains
There is no creature on the face of the earth as unmistakable foul and cannibalistically cruel as the customer
You think Batman ever gave commissioner Gordon some like absolutely foul image before doing that thing where he disappears? Like his whole thing is “stop looking at me and boom gone”. You ever think he said “yeah I got some evidence” and handed him like an image of his bat ass balls and cock out and then disappeared
Ok y’all brace yourselves cuz I just learned about a new animal
Yes, that is an animal. Yes, scientists refer to it as the purple sock worm. No, that’s not it’s real name, silly, it’s real name is Xenoturbella!
When these deep-sea socks were first discovered, no one knew what the fuck they were looking at (and, really, can you blame them?). They have no eyes, brains, or digestive tracts. They are literally just a bag of wet slop. DNA analysis initially seemed to indicate that they were related to mollusks, until the scientists realized that DNA sample was from the clams they had recently eaten (yes, they can eat with no organs. We don’t know how.)
Scientists then analyzed the data again and tentatively placed them in the group that includes acorn worms, saying that their ancestors probably had eyes, brains, and organs, but simplified as a response to their deep sea ecosystems.
Later DNA testing has since shown that they are their own thing! Xenoturbella, along with another simple and problematic to place creature called acoelomorphs, belong to their own phylum called Xenacelomorpha! This places them as the sister group to all bilateral animals. So, they just never evolved brains, eyes, or organs. They are a glimpse at a very primitive form of animal that never bothered to change, because apparently what they do works. Rock on, purple sock worm.
If you're feeling anxious or depressed about the climate and want to do something to help right now, from your bed, for free...
Start helping with citizen science projects
What's a citizen science project? Basically, it's crowdsourced science. In this case, crowdsourced climate science, that you can help with!
You don't need qualifications or any training besides the slideshow at the start of a project. There are a lot of things that humans can do way better than machines can, even with only minimal training, that are vital to science - especially digitizing records and building searchable databases
Like labeling trees in aerial photos so that scientists have better datasets to use for restoration.
Or counting cells in fossilized plants to track the impacts of climate change.
Or digitizing old atmospheric data to help scientists track the warming effects of El Niño.
Or counting penguins to help scientists better protect them.
Those are all on one of the most prominent citizen science platforms, called Zooniverse, but there are a ton of others, too.
Oh, and btw, you don't have to worry about messing up, because several people see each image. Studies show that if you pool the opinions of however many regular people (different by field), it matches the accuracy rate of a trained scientist in the field.
--
I spent a lot of time doing this when I was really badly injured and housebound, and it was so good for me to be able to HELP and DO SOMETHING, even when I was in too much pain to leave my bed. So if you are chronically ill/disabled/for whatever reason can't participate or volunteer for things in person, I highly highly recommend.
Next time you wish you could do something - anything - to help
Remember that actually, you can. And help with some science.
My brain sucks ass. I keep feeling weird and weak and wondering why (song name haha) and then I realize I. Forgot to take my meds yesterday and. Am in withdrawal
pspspspsps poetry mutuals come here... new quiz... making you the patron saint of something...
I stay up late on Uquiz to have a bit of fun and am viciously torn to pieces (good quiz)
TAKE MY QUIZ!!! and tell me who you got in the tags please (:
Here's my (finally) finished transcription of Mira Bellwether's Fucking Trans Women.
I implore you to purchase a digital copy of the zine if you're able to here. My image descriptions do no credit to Mira's talent for design and collage.
The zine is also available on archive.org here. As Mira states in FTW, it is our zine. Money should not be a barrier to access this work.
Shame how you both misspelled Lazagnea…..
My boyfriend just made a lasagne so good that I got a little bit hard
idk if anyone else felt this way, but in the Shapeshifter ep of Dungeon Meshi, it's treated like a joke that all the copies of Laios are super obviously not him, but isn't it kind of fucked up that Laios's closest companions don't seem to view him as... whole?
None of his companions had an accurate view of him as a person! One of the copies was a stupid, drooling mess! And on top of this, they all believed that because Laios struggles with social cues he wouldn't be observant to them as people. They just... fundamentally don't understand him.
I think the really accurate copies of the rest of the party was drawn from Laios's mind. His powers of observation and analytics are his strength, but that's not the same as being good with social cues.
Anyway. It made me really sad. I know his party cares about him, but it's so isolating to know your friends don't know you.
I think marcille would be a two red bulls and adderall for breakfast girlie EXCLUSIVELY if she had a big project at work or test at school or something of the like and every other day would have various pastries but I may be a fool….
chilchuck is NOT a two redbulls and adderall for breakfast girlie some of you are projecting
he IS HOWEVER a man who stops at the same place every single morning for a greasy breakfast sandwich and black coffee when not on a job without fail
he's mr. egg mcmuffin