Kaeya: Bigfoot, But Fully Shaved

literally everyone: we don’t talk about bruno!

the warm family, who has never been able to keep a secret: guess what this rat man did

Chat Noir: As your best friend-

Marinette: Alya is my best friend

Chat Noir:

As your best friend

no one:

Sole Survivor:

YOUR THOUGHTS?

Adrien: I know you’re Ladybug, Marinette

Marinette, internally: play dumb

Marinette: who’s Marinette

Marinette, internally: not that dumb!

Xingqiu: dude

Chongyun: im busy rn

Chongyun: i ate glass by accident

Xingqiu: you what

Chongyun: please leave me alone

Chongyun: i ate glass

Xiao: had it not been for the laws of this land, i would have slaughtered you

Childe: all i did was ask where the bathroom was

Childe: once i master the bow it’s over for you bitches

Sole: Do you think I could fit fifteen marshmallows in my mouth?

Nick: You’re a hazard to society

Deacon: And a coward. Do twenty

Judge: How do you plead?

Chat Noir: *looks at Ladybug*

Ladybug, mouthing: Not guilty.

Chat Noir: Hot milky

Ladybug: just lock him up

Asmodeus: your hair doesn’t go with your outfit. you look kind of halloween-y

Mammon: the fuck is up your ass today?

Asmodeus: a worm. just to make me lose a few pounds