I Basically Assume That People Don’t Like Me Unless They Explicitly Tell Me They Like Me And Then Periodically

the DSM-5 defines narcissism as being characterized in part by a "need for admiration." while this is true for most of us, i think it's a bit of an oversimplification to identify every narcissist's supply needs as just "admiration."

many narcissists just want acknowledgement. supply may not just mean praise and reverence, but also simple care. not a need to be worshiped and treated as godlike, but to be spoken to and treated as an important human being.

others may not just get supply from positive attention, but also negative attention. i've heard others talk about reveling in the thought of being the subject of someone else's resentment or hatred, just because it makes them an important figure in their life.

some narcissists seek out any attention, regardless of whether it contributes to an idolizing reputation; narcissists who become self-destructive because they know it'll get people's attention.

i think most narcissists appreciate admiration, but narcissistic supply isn't just that. what all narcissists have in common is that we need more attention than most people, be it because we were deprived of it when we needed it most or because we never learned how to live without it.

regardless, none of us really have the innate ability to feel important and appreciated unless we're given as much attention we can get.

the worlds first masochist narcissist has just interrupted bdsm roleplay after realizing they're actually really pissed off at the idea of someone else being in control

Borderline culture is drowning in guilt, but not really wanting to change because you believe it's penance for hurting people

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Bpd related question:

(Ik I'm sorry, I should stop asking but...)

Can you please list bpd symptoms? Because I want to write that tracker but I forgot like half of the things which are bpd criteria and which are things everyone is experiencing...

Thank you (and sorry for bothering you)

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Sure thing, no need to apologize, you aren't bothering us!! /g

Idolizing/devaluing

Splitting

Black & white thinking

Dissociation

Paranoia or delusions

SH and related things (i think that mental self harm counts too) (i.e., replaying bad memories to upset yourself, purposely triggering yourself, etc.)

Impulsive or reckless behavior

Mood swings

Chronic emptiness & boredom

Extreme anger

Inherent sense that you're "bad" or "evil"

Those are some of the main ones i think are both worth tracking and can be relatively easier to track as opposed to other symptoms. I hope this helps some :0!!!

- 🧨+🪶

bpd culture is going from “end of the world” to “everything is okay” in 10 minutes

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BPD culture is crying your eyes out at 1am because you can't understand why it feels like everyone around you hates you or why you feel like a terrible person even though everyone around you says you aren't.

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bpd culture is saying shit like “i’m starting to realize they made me worse” everytime one of your fps left you and then realizing that up to 80% of bpd symptoms go away when not in a relationship so yes, they did make me worse, but it isn’t any fault of their own. they were literally always destined to make me worse.

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Can you explain more about delusions and npd? I don't remember if you've talked about it before

Of course! NPD is actually primarily definable by the delusions commonly associated with the disorder. These are commonly described in general as 'delusions of grandeur'' but there’s a lot more to them than that. 

In general, there are several different variants of delusions, including but not necessarily limited to: Erotomanic, grandiose, bizarre grandiose, jealous/infidelity, persecutory, referential, negation/nihilistic, and somatic. 

Within NPD, as far as I know, the most common types are erotomanic, (bizarre) grandiose, persecutory, and negation/nihilistic can also show up mixing with grandiose. I suspect somatic could also show up based on what I know about the disorder, but I don't see it commonly spoken about.

Specifics about what each type of delusion means under the cut!

Erotomanic - Delusions regarding someone being in love with them. According to most sources, erotomanic delusions are commonly targeted toward a person of great importance or fame. This type of delusion can often involve reading into the world as giving one 'signs', things like thinking certain gestures are a beckoning or things such as that. May have overlap with grandiose ("Everyone in the world is in love with me").

Grandiose - Delusions regarding being special or having extraordinary talents ("I know how to do everything", "If I were to try to do that I would do it perfectly", "If I were in a position of power the world would be fixed"). These are most the delusions most commonly associated with NPD or ASPD.

   Bizarre Grandiose - These are a subtype of grandiose. These often focus around spiritual or religious beliefs ("I am God", "God chose me") but can also focus upon supernatural ability ("I have powers nobody else has"). Again, these are most commonly associated with NPD and ASPD.

Jealous/Infidelity - Delusions regarding the loyalty of those around you/that you may just be being lead along by those in your life, also commonly associated with fear of incoming abandonment, and they must be for little to no reason ("My partner is cheating on me", "My best friend doesn’t actually like me", "I saw my partner with someone, they’re going to leave me"). Commonly seen in disorders like BPD or PPD. 

Persecutory - Delusions regarding people in the world intending on harming you ("I'm being watched", "People are tracking me"). Most commonly associated with psychotic disorders or PPD. Can show up in NPD by mixing with grandiose ("People want to hurt me because I’m special").

Referential/Delusions of Reference - Delusions regarding ordinary, everyday experiences having hidden meanings ("I believe this song has a message specifically for me", "the clouds are telling me something"). Most commonly associated with schizo-spec disorders.

Negation/Nihilistic - Delusions rendering life/the world meaningless ("No matter what I try, I cannot affect the world", "nothing is real"). Delusions suffered in this type typically fall under the realm of Cotard’s delusion (delusions regarding being nonexistent or dead). Can have commonalities with bizarre grandiose ("I'm the only person in the world", "Nobody is real except me"). 

Somatic - Delusions that someone suffers from a disorder or medical issue. Associated with hypochondria. 

Unspecific - Delusions not fitting into any particular category. 

Mixed - Showing delusions of two or more different types. 

Hope this helps!

bpd culture is changing your entire personality and aesthetic based on a character you relate to or just some random person you thought was cool because you don’t know who the fuck you are

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