terrifying your own child into submission makes you an abuser.
watching your child cry and screaming at them to stop and invalidating their pain and reasons for crying makes you an abuser.
staring at your child in disgust and contempt after they displease you makes you an abuser.
threatening to your child to take away their basic resources if they don’t give you exactly what you want makes you an abuser.
forcing your child to feel ashamed for not living up to your ideals makes you an abuser.
using slurs, hateful names and insults on your own child without any regard to what it does to their mental health makes you an abuser.
forcing your child to chase impossible expectations and making them feel like they’re worthless for not achieving them makes you an abuser.
acting like your child is a burden and a waste of space and blaming their illness/disability/depression on it makes you an abuser.
behaving like your child will never amount to anything and isn’t worth any resources and nurturing makes you an abuser.
making your child feel like they’re never good enough makes you an abuser.
if your child’s heart is hurting because they know no matter what they do and how hard they try they will always be a failure in your eyes, you are an abuser.
if your child can’t look at themselves without self hatred because they had to look at themselves from your perspective and all they saw is disgust and hatred, you’re an abuser.
If your child is struggling to believe they have the right to live and to be cared and loved, if they can’t stop hearing your hateful voice putting them down and using their every action to prove they’re worthless, you’re an abuser.
If you watched your child in pain and assured them they deserved it, you’re an abuser.
If your child can’t love themselves from how badly you hated them, you’re an abuser.
in case you haven't thought about switching to firefox yet, here's an extension that will...
Notify you if a website you're on has employees that are on strike
Bypass paywalls for major news outlets like the New York Times
Change the browser theme based on the time of day
Directly install third party non-extension scripts
Save individual browser sessions to be reopened at any time
Use the TV format of YouTube in-browser
Make all chrome extensions compatible with Firefox
Turn YouTube dislikes back on
Fix Twitter and make it way less fucked up
Automatically remove trackers from URLs
And many more!
Feel free to add any other firefox extensions you think are slept on.
I was thinking about something earlier: being sensitive can be hard and overwhelming when most emotions you’re feeling are negative and cause suffering. But then I cried for hours listening to live music today, my soul was moved, my heart felt so much for all that beautiful music, for all that talent, for all those people involved in making this music and this concert, and I was with people I love. Everyone left the concert in awe. I felt such bliss. And honestly, being sensitive is hard, and like anything in life, it is something that one needs to learn how to live with, to find balance within it.
I’m soft, I cry easily, I feel whenever I see someone suffering, I care a lot. But sometimes I get to see so much beauty and I get to cry happy tears and think about my loved ones, and to be grateful to be alive and experiencing so much. I must allow myself to. Life itself feels like a gift these days, and allowing myself to just be me is only fair, and now restraining myself based on “what will people think if they see me cry” seems so silly. Who cares?
I’m experiencing life, this is my first and only time in this world, it’s a finite experience, and I’m not spending it ashamed of being moved by the world around me. It means this world becomes a part of me when I perceive it by the way it moves me, and I become a part of it by living life in an authentic way, without so much fear of being judged for caring a lot. What a great thing it is to exist and experience so much!
How can I find it in myself to care about the small joys when there's so many atrocities happening in the world?
There is space for both. Feeling joy does not take away from mindfulness of greater issues. In fact, it is critical to engage with the lighter side of things, otherwise you'll lose touch with what you're fighting for. You'll burn out. The world will not be saved by how much collective mindspace we give to atrocities. It will be saved by how many of us can get up and fight another day.
I know it's not easy to convince your brain of this, the things you think about aren't so easily controlled. But if giving space to the bad is preventing you from enjoying the good, it might be a good idea to step back a bit. Do something with your hands, talk to a friend, try something new. Disengage with worry as best as you can, and give yourself permission to do so. It is not a guilty pleasure; you are not harming anyone by taking a breather. And there are plenty of us filling in while you rest.
remember: don't chase the pain. if you're lucky enough to have access to an adequate supply of painkillers, use them early. if your pain is episodic, not continuous, hit the pain as soon as you notice it and your chances of avoiding a bad episode improve.
if you wait around to see if it gets 'bad enough' for painkillers, you're more likely to end up in a lot of pain that's difficult to control.
the tricky part is, if you do it right, it feels like you did it wrong. because if you catch the pain early before it gets bad, it often feels like 'it never got that bad so maybe i didn't need the medication.'
but it didn't get that bad BECAUSE of the medication! you did it right. it's okay to use the tools at your disposal. fuck the stigma.
hey here's a website for downloading any video or image from any website.
works w/ youtube, soundcloud, twitch, twitter (gifs and videos), tumblr (video and audio), and most other websites you're probably lookin to download stuff off of.
Remember kids
this quote from hbomberguy’s plagiarism video really resonated with me:
“creative people have trouble recognising their skills as skills, because eventually they feel like second nature. […] this stuff really is valuable. if it wasn’t, people wouldn’t be stealing it. creativity doesn’t feel special or unique until you realise people have to plagiarise it”
your craft is and always will be valuable, please never let anyone make you doubt that
something that i’m working on is letting things exist without justification. for example, i gained weight recently and i don’t need a reason for it. it’s not “it’s okay because it’s mostly muscle” or “it’s okay because it was while i was on vacation.”
it’s okay regardless.
My chronic pain doctor suggested I exercise more
I asked him “how?”
He looked confused. Said I should try a bit every day
I said “not when, how?” I asked what exercises I should do
He suggested half a dozen options that had all been explicitly banned by other doctors. I’m not allowed to run. I’m not allowed to bike. I’m not allowed to use my rowing machine or my punching bag.
I walk my dog whenever I have the energy and when it doesn’t hurt too much
What else can I do?
He told me I should exercise more
And then he changed the subject.
The lack of agreement across brands on what “extra firm tofu” is is, in fact, very high on my list of unimportant problems.
tumblr wisdom, refs, advice, guides this blog exists for me to refer back to |main @kit-kat-kake
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