I Yell About My Hyperfixations Into The Void, And The Void Responds With

Logan, returning, reading off laptop: OKAY so I looked it up, there's no clear origin, but the wikipedia page for 'The Birds and the Bees' has a reason that makes sense:

"...bees carry and deposit pollen into flowers, a visible and easy-to-explain parallel to the way a man brings about fertilisation. Female birds laying eggs is a similarly visible and easy-to-explain parallel to female ovulation."

Remus: Has anyone in their life ever had sex explained to them that way?

Logan: I have no clue but I have an answer now

Logan: *puts away laptop*

Remus: Why do they call it a pair of pants when it's all one article of clothing and half of it isn't called 'a pant' it's called 'a pant leg'?

Logan:

Logan: *slowly pulls back out laptop*

Remus: Why do they call it the birds and the bees when talking about procreation between people? Birds and bees aren't mammals. They're nothing like people. Do you know how a bird or bee reproduces? I just know they both lay eggs. So like, what?

Logan: *scoff* They call it—

Logan: They call it...

Logan: WAIT HANG ON

Hey since science side of tumblr explained this can I get science side of tumblr to explain my vision

So I made this:

So like if I shut one of my eyes I see everything either in cooler or warmer colors and this is my best approximation, it's weird as hell and nobody can explain it to me (but I mean I haven't gone to a vision-color-eye-expert-person) and I'm not colorblind or anything I've checked

So science side of tumblr help please?

The human memory is so weird.

Example: every single time I smell a bar of dove soap, I think of this one kid I used to go to school with. Now, I can't tell you his age. I can't tell you his favorite color. I can hardly tell you his first name.

But I remember that he always smelled like dove soap.

No matter what. It's like he carried dove soap around in his pockets. Just plain old dove white soap. And it was so strong but not overpowering— like, it wasn't a dove deodorant or something, it was like straight-up smelling a bar of dove soap whenever you were near him.

So now every time I smell dove soap he pops into my mind.

Why?

I can hardly remember my tumblr password sometimes, I forgot my own age a bit ago and had to use a calculator to figure it out. But no matter what, I remember this kid from fifth grade always smelled like dove soap.

Science side of tumblr please explain

Janus: Hey I'm ba—

Remus, clinging onto his leg: NEVER LEAVE ME AGAIN

Janus: Are you alright?

Remus: I HAVE ABANDONMENT ISSUES JANNIE NEVER LEAVE ME

Janus: You— what?

Remus: Because Virgil left! And [R̴̢̢̧̟̭̲̗͍̔̓͐̒̈́͌̎͒̓͊̚͠Ę̵̫͙͔̗̤͆̌̌̀̿͋́̄͊̽̚͠ͅͅD̷̛̛̮̝̜́͋́̕̚Ả̷̛̲̟͍̃̇͋̑̇́͛̚C̶̢̱͔͈͎͔͚̤͍̿̀͛̇͗͗̈́̾͑̾̕͜͠T̵̟͎͖̘͈͎̻̑̊̾͛̓̀͊̄͝ͅÉ̶̢͇̭̜̋̇̑̀́̐͗̾̉̀̕͠͝ͅͅD̸͉̓̀̾̉̆̃̆̊̊̿̀̾̈́] left! And you can't leave too!

Janus: (picks him up) Hey, I just went to the store. Next time you can come with me, okay? I'm not going anywhere. Okay?

Remus: *sniffle* Okay...

Roman, still there: ...Who's [R̴̢̢̧̟̭̲̗͍̔̓͐̒̈́͌̎͒̓͊̚͠Ę̵̫͙͔̗̤͆̌̌̀̿͋́̄͊̽̚͠ͅͅD̷̛̛̮̝̜́͋́̕̚Ả̷̛̲̟͍̃̇͋̑̇́͛̚C̶̢̱͔͈͎͔͚̤͍̿̀͛̇͗͗̈́̾͑̾̕͜͠T̵̟͎͖̘͈͎̻̑̊̾͛̓̀͊̄͝ͅÉ̶̢͇̭̜̋̇̑̀́̐͗̾̉̀̕͠͝ͅͅD̸͉̓̀̾̉̆̃̆̊̊̿̀̾̈́]?

Janus: . . .

Janus: Thank you for making sure Remus didn't burn down the dark side. I appreciate it.

Roman: Wait, Janus, who's [R̴̢̢̧̟̭̲̗͍̔̓͐̒̈́͌̎͒̓͊̚͠Ę̵̫͙͔̗̤͆̌̌̀̿͋́̄͊̽̚͠ͅͅD̷̛̛̮̝̜́͋́̕̚Ả̷̛̲̟͍̃̇͋̑̇́͛̚C̶̢̱͔͈͎͔͚̤͍̿̀͛̇͗͗̈́̾͑̾̕͜͠T̵̟͎͖̘͈͎̻̑̊̾͛̓̀͊̄͝ͅÉ̶̢͇̭̜̋̇̑̀́̐͗̾̉̀̕͠͝ͅͅD̸͉̓̀̾̉̆̃̆̊̊̿̀̾̈́]?

Janus: I'm sure you have very important princely duties—

Remus: *snicker*

Janus: —to fulfill, I'd hate to keep you from them.

Roman, as he's being sent away: JANUS WHO IS—

Remus: *sigh* I miss Janus...

Roman: He just went to the store, he'll be back in an hour.

Remus: *bangs fist on table* THAT'S WHAT VIRGIL SAID TOO

There'd be panic because people are so attached to it lmao the point is it's not canon but yet it's accepted as canon

Not to mention all the fics and art that would have to be altered with his new name although a lot people haven't even done that for Janus so they might not

Can you imagine the absolute chaos if Thomas confirmed Sleep's name and it wasn't Remy

Package tracker: You shipment is a state away and should arrive by the end of the day.

Me, sitting in the windowsill in the morning: Mail??

"If only Apollo had more influence today..."

I did say I'd post the colored version when it was finished, so here we go 💚🧡

Hey look, it's me

dee: gets crushes easily

also dee: is unable to imagine himself in any sort of romantic relationship because of his unwillingness to express vulnerability to others

therefore dee: cries

Dee is like "guess ill daydream abt romantic scenarios w these people although never bother to make a move in real life"

Thing I Noticed

Virgil: I freaking hated everything about this.

(Patton: Hoo, I was afraid of what you meant by "strong language".)

Virgil: Do not allow him or any of... his friends... to stick around that long ever again.

Thomas: Okay, but what—

Virgil: Ever again! Cool?

Thomas: Cool.

Virgil says this, speaking about Janus. We know that Remus is considered a friend of Janus's, however, he said 'any of his friends.' Plural.

This implies that Janus has another friend, other than Remus. Considering the split dynamic of sides, and how light sides and dark sides so far haven't been friends (though they are warming up to Janus now), it's reasonable to assume that Janus's other friend is a dark side. There are three dark sides we know of, and Virgil obviously isn't speaking about himself (he doesn't consider Janus a friend anyway).

So, with this in mind, there's two possible options:

1. There's another dark side

2. Virgil/Thomas misspoke and I'm reading way too into this

Concept: An au where L'manburg is not blown up, but Wilbur is locked in prison when it becomes Manburg, and has no idea that his friends won it back because everyone thinks he's dead (Schlatt locked him up in secret & promptly died). He's not, he's just wasting away in a cell. When they finally find him, this is the song he's singing, to himself:

I heard there was a special place

Where men could go and emancipate

The brutality

And tyranny

Of their rulers

Well, this place isn't real

You need to fret

I don't even know who’s still in-it

They kicked me out and stole it, my L’manburg

My L’manburg

It's not my L’manburg

It's their L’manburg

They stole my L’manburg

Sometimes I fuck myself up thinking about how on the DSMP Technoblade became Ranboo's sensei, and then became (jokingly) distraught because the sensei always dies, and how in real life Ranboo wears the crown because viewers said they sounded like Techno and they said "if the crown fits, wear it" and then the two became friends, with Techno being an experienced streamer/youtuber and Ranboo being extremely new

And then, y'know

The sensei always dies