When Your Grandpa Grows A Weird Dog In A Tube And Now He’s Your Brother But Also Your Pet, Sort Of

#cinnamon rolls 

The signs as three word descriptions based on people I know

Aries: tiptoe through chaos

Taurus: a pimpled goblin

Gemini: horny, but chic

Cancer: the sun’s sugar

Leo: stressed but blessed

Virgo: lovely and oblivious

Libra: pure peachy brilliance

Scorpio: don’t poke that

Sagittarius: don’t smoke that

Capricorn: deeply troubled flannel

Aquarius: that’s a fire-hazard

Pisces: nasty lil grandpa

You know how people buy drinks for girls in bars? Why can’t people do that in book stores? Like if I’m looking at a novel in Barnes and Noble and some person walks up to me and strikes up a conversation and offers to buy the book for me there is a lot better chance of that working out in their favor

What The Frappe?!

Summary: Based on a post by @charmingprincey, with additions by @thesmartestside and @divinedrabbles. Roman is an actor who keeps flirting with the cute barista at a coffeeshop, while Virgil is getting quite annoyed with this hot guy flirting with him. 

Word count: 4414

Pairing(s): Prinxiety, background Logicality, platonic LAMP 

A/N: THIS IS THE BEST THIS IS GONNA GET. LIKE, EVER. SO. 

@ohbytheangel was, as always, a huge help as coauthor! You’re the best :)

@ everyone, APPRECIATE THIS WE WRESTLED WITH THIS FOR THREE MONTHS SO 

AND THE ENDING BEING DONE IS BECAUSE OF ANGEL SO (plus me nagging them… oop)

@hghrules @becca-becky @tinysidestrashcaptain I don’t know how much you like/don’t like being tagged but eh 

When Roman entered the hottest new coffee shop in town, he didn’t expect to find the key-youtest barista serving drinks.

He was adorable, with dark, dark hair, slightly tinted purple, and sleeves that were pushed up half-way, causing him to look a zillion times more cute than he did in the first place.

The only problem?

Said barista, Virgil, according to his name tag, would not respond to his flirting!

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I guess I'm getting to James first, for he really annoys me. He's a bully, and he did really awful things when he and Reg weren't together. I hope he'll grow up. It doesn't mean I don't think he's a good friend with great potential as an adult. You portray him well. So James, why did you think it was okay to kinda harass Reg with messages about how horny and in love you are ? Do you know not everything is about sex ? And... Can't you JUST ask yourself if you're not responsible for Lily's depart?

((OOC: Again, thank you!! 😊))

James: I was an idiot.  I know I was an idiot.  I can’t change what I did and how I acted, but all I can try to do is make up for it now, which is what I’m trying to do.

James: And MAYBE I’ve been a bit lazy with my head boy duties, but it’s not my fault.  Lily should have specifically told me if she wanted me to do some work…

Fun zodiac facts here!

here’s the stuff my mama taught me: there’s iron to bind the fae, throw salt  over one shoulder  and never wait for a man to fix you -  get AAA but know how to change a tire, use tape or a knife or running water to open jars, stand on whatever you need to in order to reach the top shelf or else just don’t put things up there, and never put your man above your friends  or soon you’ll have neither, baby

i wrote you love notes in sugar packets,  told her i was so crazy for you i’d cut my hair off  she said god i hope not i tore open the jar of my body and carved out whatever home you’d lick up, crawled on knees and changed myself until i was flat by the roadside, hated the cliche but called the devil to me

my mother picked me up off the kitchen floor. she said: here’s where to put the spoons  but maman my heart is in his hands and he is a vice and i am the moon put salt on watermelon and brown sugar in tuna but maman i taste nothing and this world is nothing without him here’s how to fold a napkin  but maman i can fold into nothing but him and him and him

she shows me how to sew. how to leave out milk. how to set a smile.

she presses the handle of a knife into my palm.  “And when all else fails, my love,” she says, “Chop something up and move on.”

BISEXUAL JAKE PERALTA!

Random book idea:

 Everyone addresses each other by their zodiac sign. Like: Aries - Daniel or Capricorn - Tiana