Leeisallyouneed - Finding Peace

On the floor of my room, curled up as far as my hips will allow, wondering if in a years time I would be in a different place were everything worked out, were everything came together so beautifully, so when I look back in my minds eye and I see my self on the floor of my room, trying to hold it all together, I might in that moment think of this moment as resilience

I have been lying to myself secretly and now I’m not sure how to move forward

What part of myself likes to ignore reality, what part of myself likes to warp reality, what part of me doesn’t understand reality

It’s like I live in a day dream and the rude awakening’s become increasingly ungracious

Why is it so hard to face reality, to speak my mind, to be brutally honest to myself, why is it so hard.

Maybe it’s the fear, that causes the trembling and the aversion

Maybe I need to become friends with my fear

“Please, I want so badly for the good things to happen.”

— Sylvia Plath

affirm daily: i love me. i love myself. i love who i am. i love who i was. i love who i am becoming. i honor myself. i respect myself. i value myself. i am my own greatest gift. i am grateful for this life and all i experience. i love me.

My Cat

I dreamt I had a black cat

She, oh yes a female

She was brilliant

With black beady eyes and a

Careful countenance

She was my black cat

Musings part 301

I look around and it seems life is sucking the energy out of us, to be alive is to struggle but it’s time we all got a break, trying to not speak for the whole collective but right now planning for the future feels like a pipe dream, the goal is to make it through the day, the week, the month

How is it that of all the worlds and realities we could have built this is the one we saw fit to nurture, a world that leaves so many wanting and so few full

It’s innate for us to be greedy and selfish, it’s could even be called life, life exists by survival and survival is primal but we are conscious sentient beings shouldn’t that count for something.

I wonder what other type of worlds could we have built? Worse or better than this ?

Get to know your self,

What you love, like or hate

What makes you smile the widest

What makes you feel excited

What is love to you

What makes you feel afraid

What saddens you deeply

Who brightens up your day

I am a sensitive soul and sometimes it understands on some level the struggle of others unspoken and there is an itch to help drag them out of the hole they can’t seem to come out from

But It also knows you can’t really drag another person out of their hole, only hope they get the strength to drag themselves out and letting them know, you are standing right at the exit holding out your hand