Binged Really Bad Yesterday, Was Only Able To Purge Like Under A Quarter Of It Up Before My Throat Began

Binged really bad yesterday, was only able to purge like under a quarter of it up before my throat began to burn too much so I took a little more than 15 laxatives I think. I feel and look so disgusting, the binge wasn’t even enjoyable. I want to water fast for the next 3 days to clear my system, but theres this voice inside my head that keeps trying to get me to binge again “it’s only 1 more day” “you still have food left in the freezer you can binge on, you don’t want to waste it after spending so much money on it do you” “you can just purge it out” “if you don’t binge now you not be able to ever again” and bullshit like that. I’m not even hungry, I’m still sickly full despite purging and digesting most of it, but I just want to eat.

Binging will be the death of me, if not by physically causing me to have a heart attack then most definitely by making me kill myself.

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2 months ago

WHAT A WEIGHT PLATEAU REALLY IS

a weight plateau happens due to metabolic adaptation; where you have been in a calorie deficit or doing extreme diets for months without breaks and your weight isn't going anywhere. this is your body's way of protecting you or conserving energy.

a weight plateau is not rare and can happen at any time, especially once your body adapts to a certain intake. but, if you are truly in a calorie deficit, you will lose fat even if the scale shows that you're maintaining your weight.

metabolic adaptation is only a temporary response, if you follow the things down below, you'll most likely see a change and your metabolism will start to improve (with time) !!!

some things you should check if you suspect you might've hit a plateau:

✿ your water intake ❀ some people confuse a weight plateau with water retention. it is EXTREMELY important to note that water retention CAN cause the scale to maintain and can cause you to look "bulky" or "fat". make sure you're staying hydrated and drinking at least 2-4 bottles of water daily !!! i promise there will be a major difference.

✿ start tracking your calories for a few days (if you haven't been doing that already) ❀ this one is obvious. but sometimes we're prone to underestimating our meals or forgetting things we've eaten throughout the day. sometimes it's just out of plain embarrassment, where we're too ashamed to write it down. but it is super important to document everything you've eaten, especially if it's to see if you're truly in a plateau or if it's just miscalculations. if you're not into calorie counting, then portion control can be a good alternative.

✿ start exercising ❀ it doesn't have to be anything extreme, just moving your body might help. it doesn't matter if you get 4k steps or do a 10 minute video, all movement is good movement and might help break your plateau.

✿ while on the topic of exercise, make sure the exercises that you're doing aren't causing muscle gain. ❀ i have pcos and it doesn't help that due to my genetics, i tend to build muscle extremely easily as well. when i do exercises like cycling or leg pilates or any exercise in general that engages one point of muscles too much, they start to appear bulky after a few days and the scale ends up maintaining or going up. i've learned that just walking at a moderate pace is what works best for me and ever since i stopped cycling, the scale started dropping and i've gotten skinnier. with that being said, find out if your exercises are the reason for the scale maintaining, pay close attention to measurements and/or before and after photos, and check for symptoms of pcos if you suspect you have it!

✿ if none of these are the culprit, then it's definitely time for a metabolism/refeed day (or week... or month) ❀ eat somewhere close to your maintenance (TDEE) for a few days and then after some time you can start restricting again… that way your weight on the scale will start dropping.

❀ if you want to avoid these plateaus in the future, it's important to implement at least 1 or 2 metabolism days a week AND follow everything that i mentioned before !!

❀ it should be noted that you do not have to have metabolism days, sometimes they work and sometimes they don't. it honestly just depends on the person. like for me, i've stayed around the same calorie intake since december 2024. i was steadily losing weight until one day the scale kept maintaining in february 2025 despite doing my workouts and being in my deficit. it was only until i started upping my water intake is when the scale started dropping again. i barely had to do any refeed days. however, this isn't guaranteed to work for another person. it all just depends on how your body reacts so do whatever works best for your body ♡

2 weeks ago

Just took 25 laxatives even though the last time I took this much at once I ended up passed out on the floor with the worst stomach pain of my life, but I’m not taking any chances of maintaining for any longer.

Pray for me y’all 🙏🙏


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2 weeks ago

Just broke my fast and I regret it so much, I feel sick why do I do this to myself

2 months ago

Just finished my 20k steps, did a 10 minute stretch and stayed under my 450 cal limit we are so back and I am so ready for bed.

Goodnight lovelies may tomorrow be as, if not more successful as today has been <3


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1 week ago

Day 3 of fasting, feeling too depressed to get my steps in yet again so I’m just gonna keep going and I’ll break it tmr afternoon maybe

2 weeks ago

I miss having energy I miss having a life but Im worried that even if I recover life will still feel meaningless and I’ll just end up fat doing absolutely nothing. Like my only goal in life right now is to lose weight, it feels like I will have nothing if I stop restricting.

2 weeks ago

WHY IS EVERYOJE SUDDENKY NON STOP TALKIJG ABOUT FOOD SHUT THR FUCK UP I BEG OF YOU

1 month ago

I’ve consumed 250 calories of essentially liquid, burned 330 and have taken 15+ laxatives if I don’t shit absolutely everything out of my system and wake up a kilogram lighter istg I will jump into oncoming traffic.

1 month ago

And to no one’s surprise I did binge to the point of sickness with my friend. At this point I’m not even upset just disappointed, I mean I do this literally every time I reach a new lw and/or hang out with friends.

Im even more worried too bevause my friend is having a 3 day long birthday hang out sleepover thing and if I can’t even control myself in this situation I don’t know how im gonna do in that.

Thankfully I got 20k+ steps today so at least a small bit of it is burned, and I’m gonna take the rest of my laxative stash. Hopefully that gets rid of some of the water weight, I doubt I will weigh myself at all for the next couple days.

I think I’m gonna try liquid/water fast tomorrow and Monday and just hope for the best for the rest of the week.

God now that I am actually thinking about it I’m starting to get more and more upset at myself, I can’t believe I lost all my control just like that. I don’t know how im gonna look at myself in the mirror when I have a shower.


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3 weeks ago

Oh.my.god.

The ice cream I’ve been including in my meal plan is 170 calories each, I thought they were 120 each. I’ve been eating 500, not 450. I know it doesn’t seem like much of a difference but oh my god I’m freaking out I can’t do this.


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Kassidy

⚢ / sixteen cw: 47.2.kggw1: 48kggw2: 45kgugw: 38kgblock don’t report !!

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