I Just Spent 30 Minutes Crying In The Grocery Store Pacing Between 2 Aisles Because I Got Overwhelmed

Rewarding myself with getting my nails done when I reach 48kg !! I want them done so bad I need to lose 5kg asap

Why does the scale say I’m losing weight when I still look like a whale????😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I’m never going to recover, it’s too late now. I’m just gonna be stuck in a binge restrict cycle for the rest of my life, I know it.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

I will not binge at the movies with my friend.

HUZZAH the laxatives kicked in and it looks like I’m back down to around the 52kg mark give or take. I mean I still look fat as hell and hate myself so much for letting myself gain but the binge episode has passed and I feel more in control, more like myself.

Debating if I should get sushi & miso soup before work or just stick to my regular toast hmm hmmmm

Just weighed myself for the first time since Sunday and apparently I weigh 0.1kg less than I did before I binged. Honestly I think my scale might be broken, or skinny fat has just got me in a crazy chokehold because I look way too fat to be BMI 16.3

I COULD BEEN AT MY GOAL WEIGHT BY NOW IF I JUST DIDNT FUCKING EATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

I want to up my intake to 800 a couple days a week so I can speed up my metabolism and get more protein in but I did it today and I feel horrible and out of control and like I’m going to gain so much weight. I don’t know how or if I’m going to be able to do it to be honest, and even worse, I’m having a big sleepover with my friends this weekend and I’m sure there will be so much food. I want to cry, I can’t do this, why can’t this weight just get the fuck off of me already.

I can’t wait for the day I don’t have a muffin top while wearing my favourite jeans