Rush Hour 2 Is My Favourite Documentary

*taking a bite of the fruits of my labor* mmmm delicious. excellent. that really turned out well.

overheard in a fancy italian restaurant:

> eating lobster and jerking off are two different things

tech bro stuck on the freeway in a phone call be like: “traffic is bearish today, boss”

the italian grandma seems to be arguing in favour of packing as light as possible and so the conversation has turned to a detailed discussion of optimizing the folding of laundry

currently listening to an irate italian grandma rant to her friends about trip planning while i take the scotrail from inverness to aviemore

offsides is the en-pessant of football

we run this block, got the steel on

fits to sick, know the plague comin’ on

let’s go — minstrel barnabus!

knights gettin raptured

priests be embattled

dick so divine it’s part of the papacy

haters crusading

damsels be chasing’

god i’m so royal they call me ur majesty

but it’s much more than noise (uh)

my swordplay got poise (uh)

if you siege my castle, know you best watch out for the boys (uh)

(etc.)

💀💀💀💀

martin luther king be like:

i have a dream. and you were there i think. but i don’t remember what we were doing 🥺🥺

i’m starting to think i won’t get to wittness a trump v desantis debate which is sad, but probably for the better :/

pov the manhattan project

sure what's the worst that could happen

tony soprano is my patrick bateman