Teach Children That This Is Not Ok

The fact that Snape is one of the youngest if not THE youngest professor is fucking hilarious.

IT IS FINALLY DONE @gale-of-the-nomads ! ! ! ! FOR YOUR CRACK AU

This was fun to do~ enjoy!

I want to see Diana’s reaction when she realizes the Justice League tried to take Ladybug’s child away from her. Maybe she pledges hers and the Amazon’s alliance to Marinette should they try again?

Our Lady’s Protector

First

Diana of Themysicra was not a woman to be trifled with. She was a force of nature, a demigoddess who fought for her people and justice only. When she found out about the current Ladybug miraculous holder and what the Justice League tried to do to her, she was furious. There was nothing in this world that could have stopped her as she marched towards the Justice League’s next meeting, righteous fury in her eyes and a purpose behind her every step.

Bursting into the conference room, the Amazon glared at the two men at the head of the table. Every head turned in her direction to watch the demigoddess as she marched right up to the head of the U-shaped table and slap the Man of Steel.

The sound of flesh violently meting flesh echoed in the room, Clark’s head snapping to the side in his surprise, “Diana what are you-”

Diana cut her off, a dangerous quality to her voice as she pushed the man back into his chair, “How dare you?”

“Diana-” Batman tried interrupt but a single venomous glance in his direction had him sinking back into his sea. 

“What in the world could possibly possess you to attack her?” Diana began, her voice low but echoing in the stillness of the conference room. “How dare you try to claim her child as your own? She raised him, she loved him and you... you didn’t even know of her existence. What in your petty little mind thought you could possibly claim him over her?”

Clark stared up at the furious woman as lightening arced over her arms, the wind picking up as she spoke, “You are fortunate that m’Lady didn’t declare you an enemy, otherwise I would have every right to separate your head from your body.”

“What do you mean Diana,” Batman spoke into the silence, curiosity building up under his skin.

“Ms.Dupain-Cheng, the current holder of the Ladybug Miraculous, is allied and under the protection of Themysicra. She is our Lady, my mother’s successor, and it is my duty to protect her and her kin. If you had harmed a single hair on either of their heads, I would have no choice but to eliminate the threat.” glancing over her shoulder, the demigoddess growled, “Is that clear?”

A curious of “Yes ma’am”s echoed into the air as Diana turned on her heel, electricity sparking under her heels. “Do not attempt to harm Ms.Dupain-Cheng or her son ever again, or war shall be declared.”

A single chair scrapped against the stone floor of the Watchtower and Aqauman’s voice boomed into the silence as he joined Diana in the doorway, “Atlantis shall stand with the Amazon’s and our Lady. Hope that moment never comes.”

Together the two descendets of god’s left the room, spins straight and fury in their postures. 

Asks Are Welcome!!!!

I was promised an army. You have a supersoldier. CAPTAIN!PEGGY CARTER in WHAT IF? (2021).

“So, I know the two of you have been waiting for me to choose a best man,” Harry said. “Not really,” Hermione replied. “We know perfectly well it’s Ron.” “I will throw a fit if it’s not me,” Ron admitted. “Well, actually,” Harry started. (“Oh my god, he’s going to choose Neville. Hold me, Hermione,” Ron said.) “I was thinking…I want the both of you.” Ron grinned, then stopped, “Wait.”

“Me, too?” Hermione said with a tremble. 

“It should be the people who mean the most to the groom.” Harry murmured.  “There is no choosing between the two of you.” Harry hugged Hermione when she started to cry. “Also, I thought it’d be better to call you guys the ‘groom’s crew’? This men only thing sucks.” “That’s awful,” Ron grinned. “Malfoy’s okay with this?” Right on cue, the door burst open and Draco sauntered in, arms raised. He was followed by Pansy and Blaise. “Behold,” Draco sang. “My ‘groom’s bitches.’” “I hate weddings,” Blaise said.

Pairing: Platonic Daminette -- Word: Hilarious -- Object: Paper

“Do you think I could adopt you?” Marinette mused out loud.

“What,” Damian said, a bit shocked by the seemingly random topic.

They had been lazing around drawing when she had asked this.

However it is Marinette, so while a topic looks or sounds random it could have easily been an idea that has been on her mind for a while.

“Can I adopt you?” Marinette repeated, this time actually asking him.

“Why? I have both legal and biological guardians.” Damian states a bit confused by where this train of thought was leading to.

“I know you do,” Marinette claimed, waving a hand dismissively. “But imagine all the chaos.” She states with a grin, knowing her little cub will take the bait.

Damian turned his full attention to her.

“Five good reasons you should adopt me and I'll let you,” Damian said with a smirk.

“I could pull you out of school as your legal guardian instead of kidnapping you. I could pick you up from the manor whenever you don’t feel like dealing with your family, and again, it won’t be kidnapping. The chaos of a random person the Waynes don’t know somehow having a legal claim over you. Being able to take you to the other side of the country or world and no one questions it. Confusing the public about, is there another Wayne or is this just a family friend.” Marinette lists off the top of her head.

Damian was slightly impressed.

“People assume you get kidnapped a lot when in reality I’m just taking you to a place to chill or hang out.” Marinette realized, her tone full of amusement as she said this out loud.

“Your reasons make enough sense,” Damian said with a shrug. “You can adopt me.”

“Cool.” Marinette cheered as she began typing on her laptop.

Damian watched Marinette easily hack into his files.

“How should I present myself as your guardian?” Marinette questioned.

“Tch. You’re my older sister by blood on mother’s side and a legal adult that should be enough.” Damian states.

“True, but the public knows that your relationship with our mother’s side is bad, to say the least. To randomly have your sister from that side of the family take a claim to you might seem suspicious.” Marinette informed him.

Damian shrugged. “You’re a well-known figure in the fashion world, food world, and the world of charity funds. Plus it’s a commonly known fact that you are emancipated. I don’t see the problem.”

Marinette nods her head. “I’ll have Max get all the legal papers printed and sent to myself before the next time I kidnap you.” She claimed with a smirk.

“If that ‘kidnaping’ could be from school it would be appreciated,” Damian said going back to drawing.

“Sure thing house cat.” Marinette cheered, earning her an eraser smack to the forehead.

_______

Marinette walked into Gotham Academy, heading to the front office.

She was aware of the people watching her walk in, after all, it must be fairly strange for the CEO of Miracles Corporation to be at a high school without anyone knowing in advance. Marinette could feel the chaos radiate off the students who had most likely taken out their phones to take pictures and post about her seemingly random appearance at the school.

Walking into the office, Marinette left the door open as she began to talk with the receptionist.

“Hello, I’m here to pull my little brother out of school for the day, although it might turn into a week,” Marinette claimed with a smile and a shrug

The receptionist blinked owlishly a few times before seeming to come to her senses.

“Of course, Uhm, who will you be picking up, and what’s the reason?” The receptionist asked.

“Damian Al-Ghul Wayne. I’m his older half-sister, Marie Anette Al-Ghul, so I should be on his file as one of his legal guardians.” Marinette explains.

“Uhhh, I’ll check Mr. Way-... Al-Ghul Wayne’s file.” The receptionist claimed, typing away on her keyboard.

“Ah, here it is. There’s a note saying you would bring in a physical copy of all of the official paperwork when you stopped by the school in person.” The receptionist states.

“Yup! Here you go.” Marinette said with a cheer, handing over the documents.

“Alright, looks like all the papers are in order. I’ll just need the reason for his absence and the length of time we should expect him to be gone for.” The receptionist claimed before calling Damian up to the office.

“Damian Al-Ghul Wayne, Please come to the office for dismissal. Damian Al-Ghul Wayne, Please come to the office for dismissal.” Was announced over the loudspeakers.

“I’ll be in Gotham for the next few months and want to spend time with my little brother. I will only be taking Damian out of school for a week though, not the entire length of my visit. He will be back in school for next Friday’s classes.” Marinette informed the receptionist.

There was a knock on the office door, the movement pushing the door open. You could tell that Damian had been about to say something but instead, he launched forward pulling Marinette into a hug.

Marinette pulled away from Damian to ruffle his hair.

“Ready to go Dames?” She questioned. Receiving an enthusiastic nod.

With a quick thanks to the receptionist, Marinette left the school campus with Damian, driving off in her sleek black car.

The Al-Ghule siblings later laughed as Damian’s phone was blown up by the Waynes asking questions about his sister they had never been told about.

They found it hilarious, especially with the trending video that one of the students took, recording Marinette’s whole interaction with the receptionist.

Tabloids had already started putting out articles about them. Marinette’s personal favorite is the one where they speculated her being a Wayne even though Marinette had said her full legal name on the video. All they really had to do was look up the name ‘Marie Anette Al-Ghul’ and they could find anything they wanted about her, but instead, they only speculated.

Who knew that signing a few papers would create this much chaos?

Peter: The gods gave me depression because if my ambitions went unchecked I would have bested them all in hand to hand combat by age 13

Thor, local Norse God, dropping Peter off at his psychiatrist: *sweats*

Women Self Defense in 1947

ok srsly who invented color guard??? like one day “sir you know how me and some guys carry our country’s flag and guard it with rifles?” “yes” “what if we threw that shit in the air” “….fucking BRILLIANT, Jim”