Miss Lupin - 2

Happy Birthday to my Bunny Boy

Found something in my draft and wanted to share it...

So, I just read Johnathan Swift’s Meditation Upon a Broomstick. Honestly, I barely knew its context yet the finishing misogynistic tone kind of threw me off. So, I did some digging and here’s what I could gather so far.

Let me give you some quick summary and the background context of it. Apparently, Swift had to do some reading of Occasional Reflections Upon Several Subjects by Robert Boyle to the ladies of the house. These are usually some observations of Boyle’s of the regular objects and his attempt to link a philosophical connection with the said objects using biblical references and such. Swift found them to be absolute nonsense and in an attempt to criticize Boyle he produced his very own lamentation on a regular object such as the broomstick which he called some kind of ‘meditation’ from his part. At the beginning, the ladies could not catch on to that but soon realized that the rant was taking an absurd turn instead of a philosophical one.

Now, upon reading some analysis of the text (Swift’s), I came to find out that not only he meant to ridicule Boyle but also his readers. And I took it personally. What kind of person mocks other people just because they take pleasure from certain kinds of entertainment that doesn’t appeal to this particular person personally?

Now, I might have considered that Swift genuinely believed that Boyle’s ideas were trash if I hadn’t read something in another article. There are hints that Swift’s Gulliver’s Travels were inspired by Boyle’s idea of creating such a romantic story. So, I would have loved to question, why Johnathan, why? Why did you despise Boyle so much? Is it because his works entertain more ladies than yours? Because he’s more popular among women than you are? Are you jealous?

I also came to another conclusion upon this matter. It is not new that we are ridiculed for our liking for anything. Women have been insulted time after time for something they are interested in, something that they can relate to, something that gives them comfort. Whether women enjoy romantic movies or K-pop or anything at all, they are sure to be made fun of. Because long before, they were even insulted upon liking someone who is now known to be the first modern chemist. In this context, Swift's witty nature seems bitter, doesn’t it?

I loved A Modest Proposal, which is the first and the only thing I read by Johnathan Swift. I really expected something better from him. Now, some of y'all might come at me saying it was only meant to be a joke. Swift and even the ladies might have had some laughs over this event. Of course, that could be the case. I wouldn’t even have to know about it then. The fact that he esteemed this manner was right to be made public in writing is what bothers me.

That was just my thoughts. Let me know if you have something to say as well. Also, feel free to correct me if I get anything factually wrong.

Henceforth, I totally love Suga

Today, I discovered the rap songs “First Love” and “The Last” by Suga (Agust D). And I swear to God, I cried. Never in my life I imagined the lyrics would be so deep and the emotions so raw.

The Last: At first, let’s talk about “The Last”. I have known that Suga had a troubled relationship with his parents. I could only imagine how hard his childhood had been. Hats off to Suga for being too brave to write about such a hard time of his life so vividly.

How he had struggled with depression, OCD and anxiety at such a young age, how his own parents never understood him, how he had self doubt to the point of comparing himself to a monster, how he had survived (I dare say) attempted suicide and finally how he had masked it all out with his cold posture.

Imagine going through such a tough time and confronting it. Including such details about his own life in a song was really brave of him and he had owned all my respect for that. I’m really happy that the song ends with a little bit happier tone where Suga assures us that he is doing okay now.

First Love: Though in the beginning I thought it would be a romantic song about his love life, the first line of it changed that immediately. It was about him falling in love with music which is metaphorically presented by the image of a brown piano.

Music was always by his side and had helped him fight against all the problems. So basically, music was like a coping mechanism for his troubled life. Due to this passion he had found in music he was finally able to overcome every hard situation and became who he is today.

This is probably the best rap song I’ve ever heard in my entire life. It was so beautiful that I cried without any hesitation. Even seeing Suga performing it live on stage, struggling to fight back tears, broke my heart.

I am grateful to Suga for giving us these songs. I really hope he finds peace within himself and live the best life for more days to come.

How can these all characters be played by the same person? Speaking of range...

My Connection to IT

I watched the (IT) movies before I read the book. I only rated the movies 3 stars out of 5 and I didn’t expect that I would love the book as much as I did. The book is more sentimental.

I usually have hard times explaining something I like. So, I can’t make people (who haven’t already read it) understand that this book is not just merely a horror book. It creates so many emotions while reading. So I took some time to think about why I actually felt so connected to the story and it turns out that I can relate to most of the main characters.

Eddie: Eddie has some mommy issues as we know. Eddie’s mother Sonia; who is also a single mother, is overprotective of her son. She stresses too much about her son getting sick that it ends up Eddie being a hypochondriac for the rest of his life. As much as Eddie wants to run away from the house he can’t quite get over the fact that his mother actually loves him and there is no one in her world without him. He knows she has him under control, but can’t protest in fear of hurting her. I, too, sometimes feel the same way. My mother loves me very much and I know it. But I also know that she is overprotective towards me which actually makes me suffocate sometimes. But yet, it’s hard to deny the fact that it is love which drives her to do so. I, too, feel like I can’t really leave her behind.

Ben: Ben is such a sweetheart. He is also a bit nerdy like me. He is probably the most loneliest among the losers. I had wondered many times whether I will be lonely too in the future. I do have friends. But I just feel like I’m very different than the person they think I am and this friendship we have are just temporary. I think, like Ben, I will also have to live alone.

Richie: The clown of the group is Richie ‘Trashmouth’ Tozier. His friends usually think he lives the happiest life. But a clown just wears a mask. Behind it who knows what lies. The saddest part is when I realized Richie is the only one who can’t show the true self even in front of his friends. This ‘holding on’ of the emotions is more depressing than anything can ever be. My friends think that I’m also living the best of life. I don’t or simply can’t show what is actually going on in my mind. People will usually describe me as the carefree and funny guy.

These are some of the many things I find similar to myself. Maybe I’m too much sentimental for my own good. But one thing is clear, IT depicts the human nature in an amazing way.

Sleepy Cats

Fandom: BTS

Pairing: Min Yoongi × Female Reader

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

"What are you doing here?" Yoongi asked eyeing the pillow and blanket on my hands, as I stood in front of his studio door.

"I can't sleep alone." I said.

Yoongi walked up to me and grabbed the pillow from my hands, "You can't sleep in here."

"Didn't you hear what I said?" I pouted, "Yoongi, I'm not going to sleep alone. Now, either you come to the bed with me or I sleep here on the couch while you work."

Yoongi sighed and nodded, "alright!"

I prepared my bed on his studio couch and lied down. Yoongi, putting on his headphones, went back to his work.

"How heartless!" I thought.

After what seemed like a tormenting hour of tossing and turning, I walked up and stood behind him long enough for him to notice me.

He pulled back his headphones, "What now?"

"Come lie with me till I sleep." I demanded.

"Please go back to the bed. I told you, didn't I? You can't sleep in here." He ignored me again and turned back to his screen.

I grabbed the Shooky plushie from his table and went back to the couch. Yoongi glanced back at me. I held Shooky tightly on my arms and closed my eyes shut forcefully.

"Make some space for me, please." I looked up and saw Yoongi standing beside me.

We were squeezed in the little space of the couch. I rested my head on his chest while he slowly caressed my hair. Hearing his heartbeat was really soothing.

"Don't stress yourself too much." Yoongi whispered in my ears.

I let out a chuckle, "Look, who's giving me advise about relaxing!"

Yoongi smiled and pulled me into a tighter embrace, "Now close your eyes and go to sleep."

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

My Masterlist

Gangubai Kathiawadi (2022) - Movie Review

I just finished watching "Gangubai Kathiawadi" and it was phenomenal. It deserves all the praises it gets. If you want to feel something from a movie, go watch it. (And also it's on Netflix)

How a woman was sold to prostitution and slowly raised to gain power? Though lengthy, the plot was paced perfectly. It didn't rush to complete the story.

The dialogues hit hard as they are so powerful. For example, in a scene where Gangu was trying to get the children of the prostitutes admitted into a school, she was asked the identity of their father mockingly. And she replied with, "Isn't mother's name enough?" She even put humour to it and asked to add the name of a famous actor as the father of all the children. If you've already watched it, you know what I'm talking about...

And about Alia Bhatt, I think she did a great job and deserves all the praises.

But I think the character of Raziabai should be played by a real life eunuch. Apart from this, I overall enjoyed the film.

Red Hope! - Part 5

Specially requested by @lelewright1234. Hope you enjoy!

Note: This work is totally fictional and has nothing to do with BTS on real life. I mean no hate toward any person in particular. This plotline was requested. Though I personally hate bullies, I still believe there is hope for everyone.

Fandom: BTS Pairing: OT7 × OC (Leah) Warning: Bullies, allergy attack, OC suffering from amnesia, flashbacks etc. Genre: Fluff and Angst Summary: The boys plan to meet Leah one at a time for her to get to know them better...

Part 1 - Part 2 - Part 3 - Part 4 - Part 5 - Part 6 - Part 7 (Complete)

*************************************************  

The doctor had suggested me to stay in the hospital for three more days and to take rest for the whole week even when I go home. The seven boys had made a schedule to meet me one at a time throughout the week. That sounded alright to me since I wanted to know them individually and talking in a group did not allow much opportunities.

*************************************************  

Day 1: Hoseok knew the steps too…

I was lying on my hospital bed. Hoseok had been sitting next to me on a chair while humming a song that sounded familiar to me. “What is this song?” I asked.

“Tightrope by Michelle Williams” he replied, “do you remember it? It was your favorite song to do ballet on.”

“It rings a bell.” I said.

He smiled at me and said, “I can’t wait to see you do ballet again.” I smiled back. I couldn’t wait to do it too. I wanted to know the feeling of dancing again.

“Oh, don’t make that face.” Hoseok pouted.

“What face?”

“That Smile-through-the-pain face. It hurts right here.” He put his hands on the left side of his chest to indicate his heart. The cute faces he was making were enough to melt my heart away and I laughed. This time it was genuine.

“Get up.” He said, “I don’t think anyone’s coming to check on you now.”

I did as he asked me to. He turned on the song I knew so well on his phone and came toward me. He took my hands in his. Then, we started to move along the music. We danced and danced. I closed my eyes to feel every beat. Hoseok didn’t need to lead me. I already knew every step of it.

The song ended. I opened my eyes and stared into his, breathing heavily. We were standing too close to hear each other’s heart beating, fast but rhythmic.

*************************************************  

Day 2: Jungkook spilled the truth...

Jungkook was complaining an awful lot about how he had missed half of the day because his hyungs had made him go to the school.

“It’s okay.” I said, “We still have enough time.”

“We have time, though,” he said in an annoyed voice, “but not enough.”

I had been pondering over the fact that Jungkook had stopped going to the school since I was in a coma. That sounded like we were very close. Hesitantly I finally asked him about it.

Jungkook’s face turned red as he shook his head slowly.

“No?” I asked, “Then why would you stop going to the school?”

“Don’t you know about the accident?” he asked in a serious voice.

What could the accident had to do with it? I was told that I was hit by a car and ended up being in a coma. But nobody gave me any details about it.

“What about it?” I asked.

“It was supposed to be us.” He said, his voice sad, “me and the boys.”

“Supposed to be?” I was confused.

Jungkook explained how they had been drunk that night. If it weren’t for them, I wouldn’t have ended up the way I did. Jungkook’s eyes were filling up with tears.

“Come on, Jungkookie!” I tried to cheer him up, “I must have cared for you enough to have save you like that.”

“Yes, you did.” A tear fell from his eye, “Only we didn’t do the same.”

*************************************************

Day 3: Namjoon defended the boys...

I woke up hearing a rather loud conversation in the hospital corridor. It sounded like Nina was arguing with someone. I went closer to the door and I could hear what the other parties were saying.

“I can allow some of you,” Nina was saying, “But never Jin and Yoongi. I bet they’re still planning to prank her the way they always did.”

“Nina!” It was one of the boys, but I couldn’t recognize the voice, “We’ve talked about this. I promise you, nothing’s going to happen to her. We’ve learned our lessons.”

“I don’t trust you.” Nina snapped back, “You guys are capable of anything.”

“Alright!” he sounded exhausted, “How about we talk about it later, this evening? Does that sound good?”

There was no reply from Nina. I could hear footsteps approaching my door. So, I quickly ran toward my bed, grabbed a book from the table and sat there pretending I was reading.

Namjoon opened the door and as soon as he met my eyes, his grim face broke into a smile. I smiled back at him, not knowing what to do otherwise.

“Are you done with that one?” he pointed at the book I was holding.

“Just a little bit left.” I lied, though I had already finished reading it yesterday.

“Here,” he handed me the book he bought with him, “I hope you’ll like this one.” It was ‘Me Before You’ by Jojo Moyes. I took the book and thanked him.

I didn’t want to talk to him. I was too confused about the conversation that I just overheard. Somehow, hearing Nina not being able to trust them made me question their behaviors. Why were these boys being so good to me?

To avoid Namjoon, I pretended to read my book. He seemed to have understood that I was not in a mood to talk. He patiently waited for me quietly. After an hour, when I was still not paying any attention to him, he rose up.

“I’ll get going, then. Enjoy the book while you’re still here. They’re gonna release you tomorrow. So, good luck!”

*************************************************

Day 4: Jin made a promise...

I felt really bad the whole day once Namjoon was gone. I felt bad for suspecting him. He was such a gentleman. There was no way, he would try to hurt me. I thought of taking a chance to meet the boys and get to know them by myself. I was not going to judge them just because of something I overheard.

The next day, I was released from the hospital. My mother, stepfather, Nina and Jin came to take me home. As expected, Nina was not comfortable about Jin being there. It was visible on her facial expression.

When we reached home, everyone was busy making me feel comfortable, asking me if I needed anything. I said I wanted to stay at my room if that was okay. My mother nodded.

Nina and Jin followed me to my room. It was evident that Nina was not going to let me be alone with Jin today. I did not make any complaints either.

When Jin failed to get any attention from the two of us, he announced, “Leah, do you remember that I am a great cook? Master chef actually. Just wait and see how I’m going to surprise you.” Saying that he went to the kitchen while Nina rolled her eyes.

Jin came back with two bowls of hot ramen. “Oops!” he said, “I forgot that Nina’s with us.” And then he started to giggle like an idiot which made me laugh too.

“Very funny!” Nina said in an annoyed voice. Then she bought a pair of chopstick for herself and shared the ramen with mine.

As I slurped the ramen I remembered something from the past. I had an allergic reaction from ramen in the school cafeteria. Someone had mixed MSG with my ramen.

“Was it you?” I asked Jin.

He was confused but seemed to have understood the graveness of the matter. “What is it, dear?” he asked.

“Did you ever prank me by putting MSG in my ramen?”

He was startled as if he didn’t expected me to remember that. Nina sighed but stayed silent, wanting him to explain it himself.

“I…” he hesitated, “Yeah. But I didn’t know you would have such a violent attack. It was meant to be a joke.”

“Thank you but I’m not eating that.” I pushed the bowl away from me, “Can you guys please leave? I’m tired.”

Nina nodded and walked out of my room. Jin sat there for a while, his expression unreadable. Then, he slowly walked to the door. He turned to me and said, “I’m sorry, Leah. I promise we will make it up to you.”

*************************************************

Day 5: Jimin had cuteness in his bag…

The doorbell rang. I knew it was one of the boys. I stayed in my room and heard my mother open the door. There was a few minutes of greeting. Then came a knock on my door.

“Come in” I said.

Jimin peaked his head first. “Hello!” he called with a smile. He had bought flowers again. This time it was orange tulips. He handed me those.

“Are you a florist?” I asked. In reply, Jimin just laughed.

I was still not over yesterday. I had a feeling that I had shared a somewhat bitter-sweet relationship with the boys. Nina had told me that the boys were trying their best to be better. I asked her what that meant. She just shrugged her shoulders and told me that she would let me figure it out eventually.

“Are you still mad?” Jimin asked pouting his lip. He looked too cute for me to remain mad at him.

“Jimin,” I said, “will you tell me something honestly?” Jimin sat beside me and said, “Ask away.”

“Why are you guys being so nice to me?”

“Because we care for you.” Jimin said. Before I could say anything further, he added, “I know, you might be having some doubts. But trust me, we really do.”

I felt like I could trust him. I pushed my suspicions away and said, “So tell me, what we are going to do?”

Jimin grinned, “Just wait and see what I have in my mind.”

It was true. There weren’t any fun games left that we didn’t play. Starting from painting old stuffs, we played video games, card games and board games, we even played a little hide and seek around the neighborhood. Finally at night, we watched a movie together.

Jimin really had a charm about him. It was hard not being happy around him. Unexpectedly the day went too good. Even my mother noticed that I was happy. And when I went to sleep at night, I was already missing Jimin.

*************************************************

Day 6: Taehyung made a valid point…

I waited for the next Bangtan boy to arrive. I really had fun with Jimin that I was regretting being rude with Namjoon and Jin. I told myself that these boys were probably very fun loving and made jokes without thinking about the consequences. I let Nina’s words assure me that they were trying their best to be better.

The sun had already sat when Taehyung showed up in my house. I was getting a little angry at that time.

“Why bother coming at all?” I asked him first thing once we met.

Taehyung said, “eeeh” to show me his teeth.

“What was that for?”

“I had a sudden toothache” he said, “had to see a dentist. It was really scary.” Then he started massaging his cheeks.

“Aww!” I said, “I’m so sorry, dear. Does it still hurt?” Taehyung pouted his lips and nodded.

“Since its already dark,” I continued, “wanna go sky gazing?”

“Yes! Let’s do that.”

We were lying down on our back in the backyard. There were not much stars to be seen. But staring at the empty sky was somewhat peaceful. I was thinking about how my life had turned out, how little I knew about myself and others. It was really overwhelming.

“I’m scared for the first time since I woke up.” I said to Taehyung.

Taehyung looked at me and asked, “Why are you scared of me?”

“I’m not scared of you, silly!” I chuckled, “I’m just scared about the fact that I’m all empty inside.”

“You’re not.” Taehyung’s voice suddenly sounded very serious, “You’re still the same you. It’s just the memories that’s gone.”

“But aren’t memories what make us who we are?” I asked, turning to face him.

“I don’t know. But hey! We can always make new memories.” Taehyung tried to cheer me up, “Why don’t you take it as a fresh start; a new chapter of your life?”

“A new chapter” I whispered, “at least I’m glad I have you guys.”

*************************************************

Day 7: Yoongi showed his humorous side…

“I can’t believe it’s raining at this time of the season.” Yoongi said. He was a little grumpy today. He had planned to surprise me by taking me to see the local basketball match. But due to bad weather and the fact that the match was to be played in the open, it was cancelled.

“It’s alright, Yoongi!” I put my hand on his shoulder, “take me there some other time. You should be happy that it’s raining or else Nina would have showed up.”

Yoongi gave a fake smile, “Oh yeah! Thank God that Nina is not here today.”

Since we couldn’t find anything interesting to do, we tried to solve an extremely hard puzzle, which exhausted us both. We couldn’t even find any interesting topic to talk about. We were getting bored at a point when Yoongi suggested to make a bucket list each for the next 10 years to come.

I said, “Tae told me last night that it was a new chapter of my life. Making a bucket list sound like a good place to start.”

“So without further ado, let’s get started.” Yoongi bought two pieces of papers and pens for us and we both started to write whatever came to our minds.

“Number one: Go see the Egyptian Pyramid.” I said aloud while writing.

“Number one for me would be going to the city, Barcelona” Yoongi wrote.

So we kept writing. What food we wanted to taste? What classics we wanted to read? How many pets we wanted to own? What our future home would be like? Etc. etc.

“Number 27” I said, “Experience a burning and passionate love.”

Yoongi paused to think his number 27. Then with a smirk, he said, “Help you experience a burning and passionate love.”

We both broke out into laughter. It was rather hilarious hearing a grumpy boy like Yoongi saying something so silly.

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My Masterlist

The idea was better in my head. But I’m not a professional.

I had a dream, I was a lady. Or was it a nightmare?