Makes Me So Fucking Frustrated And Upset “oh It Could Be Worse It Could Be This It Could Be That”

I can’t keep doing this

I can’t do this anymore I can’t fucking do it anymore

Where do I go who do I go to fuck this shit

I feel so fucking destructive right now it’s taking everything in me not to fucking brutally stab my stomach over I’ve already sliced my damn legs up but that’s not enough anymore I need to be unrecognizable

I feel like puking i feel like I’ve just been robbed of all my love and that resulting in my hatred for romance I just . I’m so dysphoric I’m so bitter I’m so angry I just want an escape I just want someone for fucking once to love me and my imperfections and not prefer a specific fucking genital over my entire being I don’t know what to do I don’t believe anyone when they say they love me anymore because they’re fucking lying

I just want to give up on everything I fucking Hate my life I hate romance I hate sex I hate myself I hate everyone I fucking hate existing I just wish I was dead so fucking bad holy fuck I’m going to kill myself maybe that’s what I should do for my 18th birthday just blow my fucking head off

I’m fucking devastated nothing will be okay I’ll never be okay I am going to fucking end my life

It is like there’s always something with me and it makes me feel so ashamed. I don’t cause problems on purpose. I don’t act out this way on purpose. I just want help

Somebody please fucking help me I can’t take this anymore

I am forced to be awake every agonizing second to feel the worst mental pain in existence. I can’t kill myself because there’s such a big chance I will fail. Yet I can’t keep waking up like this anymore. This is limbo. This is my personal Hell. I can’t escape at all. I can’t fucking escape. I can’t leave. I have to be here and I can’t fucking do it anymore yet I am forced to because the alternatives are no better. I’m so fucked. I am so fucked

I have nothing to lose I don’t feel anything anymore