It Is Time For Christians To Stop Ranking Sins.

I am with you. I am for you. I am sorry. I love you. I want to help.

Is sex before marriage a sin? If so, why? Does the ceremony make a difference to God if you're in a fully committed relationship? Is it a sin to have sex the night before the wedding but not a sin 24 hours later? I've always believed in waiting but now I'm questioning what the difference is to God

In your question I can see that you have already gotten rid of the idea of marriage as a covenant. When you ask “does the ceremony make a difference to God if you’re in a fully committed relationship?” the answer is yes because it’s not a fully committed relationship until the ceremony that symbolizes the covenant relationship between you and your spouse before God. If marriage is just a ceremony or a social contract, then yeah, it wouldn’t make that big of a deal, but it is so much more than that. It is an image of the relationship that Christ has with his bride the Church. 

Marriage is not the small thing that the culture has made it out to be. The call in marriage is to give your life for your spouse, and when people throw their marriages away for nothing then it gives people the idea that marriage really isn’t that big of a deal and that in the end it’s basically just like any other relationship. Once you start thinking that way, then marriage becomes irrelevant. But that’s not what marriage is. It’s a covenant between you your spouse and God, and as such it should be treated with great reverence.

Today is #WorldToiletDay. Did you know 2.5 billion people - 36% of the world’s population - don’t have access to a clean and safe toilet?

Learn how we work with communities around the world to end #opendefecation and provide clean and safe toilets for all: http://uni.cf/1qrPCSk

RANT Warning: indelicate language and imagery. Okay, so apparently as much as 54% of men and 42% of women are STUPID. I'm sorry but I'm not gonna be all politically correct about this. Anyone who answered yes to any of those questions is STUPID. STUPID AND WRONG.  For anyone out there who's a little bit confused....

RAPE IS NEVER OKAY. 

No matter what. No matter who long you've been dating, no matter how much money he spent, no matter what her level of sobriety, no matter what he's seen of her or done with her, no matter what mixed signals he's gotten, NO MATTER WHAT. It's not okay to force sex on a woman who does not want it.  And let's just stop and examine two of the conditions up there:  a) He is so turned on he thinks he can't stop. b) She gets him excited sexually. 

Ohmygoodness. MAN UP. Newsflash: Guys get turned on all the time. It's not exactly a novel thing. Guys can get turned on for no apparent reason. 

As a guy, are you seriously gonna try and tell me that you couldn't help it?  (This is where it gets graphic) ...That your dick was hard so you just HAD to ram it inside of her? That's bullshit! (I get vulgar when I get angry).  Oh, you were horny. Oh you poor baby. My heart bleeds for you, it really does.  MAN UP.

You're not an animal. You're not a robot. You don't HAVE to do everything your body wants you to. As a human, you SHOULD have morals. And you are able to reason and make choices. If you know that rape is ALWAYS WRONG (which it is) then you CAN walk away. You are not so weak that you are helpless against the primitive desires of your flesh.  So when I hear someone say something like "he's so turned on he thinks he can't stop" or "she gets him excited sexually", you know what I think? I think that "he" is a cowardly, lazy, spineless, weak, pathetic BOY. Because any man who cannot master his body and decide to respect women despite his physical urges is no man at all. 

Do not say to me "it's all about the fetus" with that bitterness in your tone!

Abortion is not about who we like more - the mother or the fetus! This is an issue of quality of life vs. sanctity of life. And as I've said before, no one can prove at what point between conception and birth that clump of cells becomes a human. But we all agree that once it pops out of the birth canal, it is a person, and THEN it's wrong to kill it. So here's my big issue. For me, sanctity of life ALWAYS trumps quality of life. I'm not going to justify killing an unborn person just for the comfort of someone who's ALREADY been born. IF (that's a big IF) one believes that a fetus is a person, then an abortion is a murder for the sake of sparing someone inconvenience. I know I know I know there are so many reasons why someone might get an abortion. What you're saying there is that in some circumstances the fetus is not a person. Unless you don't believe a fetus is ever a person, then whatever. But you have to take a stance. If you think abortion is only justified in some circumstances, then you have some gaps in your understanding of personhood. Because you're basically saying there that only when the mother decides she wants the baby does the baby indeed become human. I'm not asking you to agree with me. I am asking you to really think about why you believe what you believe. Don't say "it's all about he fetus" as if we were choosing the fetus over the mother because if you say that to me, I will respond "yes! In this instance, it is about the fetus for me because the fetus is the one who might die!" Think about what you say. Think about what you think. This is a brutally complicated topic and we all run the risk of oversimplifying it sometimes, which is exactly what the titular statement does.

How do you feel about living with someone before you're married?

Well…I think it’s really..dangerous. Like, I’ve decided that I’m not gonna have sex before marriage. And living ALONE, TOGETHER, with someone makes it reeeeeeeally easy to have sex with them. Basically, if I were living with my boyfriend, I’m pretty sure we’d have sex. I know my limitations, and I definitely don’t trust myself that much. So I wouldn’t do it. :P I’m staying faaaaarrrr away from that line.

Thank for the question! Peace and love! -Katherine

Prayer - July 17

I'm a broken record. I spit the same words out at you. Over and over and over. By now they've lost all meaning, even to me. I'm stuck on the same part of the song. I'm singing you the same refrain again and again, but it's getting tired. "I'm sorry for letting myself grow cold. I'm gonna make a commitment to do better." How many times have I been "saved"? How many times have I prayed the prayer of repentance? How many times have I recommitted my life to you? Did I ever really mean it? I'm lukewarm water. Unfit for drinking, unfit for cooking, unfit for anything. I'm stagnant and disgusting. There are dust particles and all sorts of nasty bacteria collecting in this water. No wonder it make you gag. Maybe the worst possible fate I could think of - making Jesus gag. God, I don't want to make you gag. I know that I'm lukewarm because my life has become all about doing everything "right" and being "perfect" and "having it all together". My all-consuming passion is keeping that pathetic insecurity at bay by trying to fit all the roles I think I'm supposed to fit. But you've called me to something so much more. You've called me to break the mold. I know that your plans for me are so much above and beyond anything I could imagine. I know that you can take my life and turn it upside down and inside out and make something crazy amazing with it. So why am I so happy with my average, nice, white-picket-fence existence right now? Here's my life, jesus. Maybe this is the first time I've ever given it to you. Here are my fears and insecurities. Here are my dreams. Here are my plans. Here's my time. Here's my money. Here are my talents. Here are my passions. Here are my skills. Here's my past. Here's my present. Here's my future. Take it all. Love, me.

love.

If Jesus lived today, he would smell like smoke.

Whether it be from pot or from cigarettes or whatever else can be smoked, Jesus would smell like it. Not because he would partake in it himself, but because he would go out of his way to go to where the smokers were. He would go to them and be with them, get to know them and show them that they are worthy of love and that they can be saved from whatever they’re running from.

Jesus would know the sensation of stale beer drying on his shirt because somebody forgot to put their drink down before they hugged him. He’d never get drunk but he might have one beer, maybe two, socializing as he got to know the regulars at the bar. The ones who found their way there day after day, hearts too heavy to do anything but numb the pain. He’d go there and listen to their stories and help carry their burdens, lift them off their shoulders. He would be the person that everybody knew—knew was safe, knew was loving, knew would listen. The bartender would call him the ‘unofficial shrink’, and Jesus would smile and order another glass of water, ready to drive home whoever would need it that night.

He’d know the feel of gauze beneath his fingers as he wrapped it around a friend’s bleeding wrist. He wouldn’t ask, wouldn’t pry, just patiently clean and treat it with careful, calming touches. The story would eventually come tumbling out in the bathroom and Jesus would draw them close, hugging tightly, and do whatever he could to find the best help available when asked, when needed.

He would know the drained, yet relieved, morning after feel the day after (of?) a three a.m. phone call from a person who was desperate, because they didn’t know who else they could turn to. He would know the days when one cup of coffee isn’t enough to wake him up, where two cups of coffee almost doesn’t do it either, but the lethargy and the headache and the bags under his eyes are worth it because the person he was talking to is okay. He would do it again in a heartbeat, too.

He would always have somebody staying in his spare bedroom—if he wasn’t staying in somebody else’s spare bedroom himself. He knows what it is to be without a roof over his head, without a blanket to pull over his cold body, and he would do whatever he could to make sure others didn’t need to experience it—even just for a night. He’d keep an eye out for help wanted ads and help his friends on the street with their resumes and pay for their haircut and nice clothing for the interview, and he’d buy them dinner after whether they got the job or not.

He would know the need to go and grab another box of kleenex as the person at his kitchen table can’t help but cry at the feeling of not being enough, of needing to change themselves before people would love them, before they would be accepted. He would know the heave of their shoulders beneath his hand as he comforted them, reassured them that they are enough, that they are wonderful and beautiful and amazing and loved. So, so loved.

He would know the feeling of a tight bank account, not because he doesn’t know how to manage his finances, but because there are other people who need it more. Who need food for their families and clothing for their children and money for their rent. He would give of himself and build relationships with these people, connections with them, encouraging them to keep going. To keep striving. That life isn’t out to get them, and that they can succeed.

He would know the pain of a harsh word, thrown at him by a hurting soul, and he would stand tall and take it because sometimes a broken heart just needs to shout.

If Jesus lived today, he would smell like smoke. Not because he approves or because he doesn’t care, but because he knows that to love isn’t just being pleasant to other people and giving them a smile, it’s crawling into the trenches with them.

I really love your answers to the questions you get, because they're very well thought out and it's like you actually care and put the effort in to thoroughly answer them instead of a few nonchalant lines that aren't very bible based. Plus you don't get all self righteous and judgemental when someone disagrees with you which is what a lot of these other Christian bloggers do. God bless you and I will most probably be asking you something in the future! :)

Awwww!!! I am SO, SO glad that you took the time to tell me that. Thank you very much; I really appreciate it :) Your blog is gorgeous, btw! :)