crazycrapinc

Latest Posts by crazycrapinc

I'm curious why you don't use images in your posts?

It is my greatest hope that my writing is vivid enough that the mental picture it conjures would suffice (also I never thought about it)

When my sanity is tied so tightly to the notion

That you will always be mine

I hope you understand why I'm broken

When the strings of fate that tangled us together

Begin unraveling

Like the denumount of a bittersweet film

That I've seen coming but just can't bear to watch.

I've turned the ending in my mind

Like a smooth stone in my hand

Feeling for any scratch and mar

To justify holding on

Instead of skipping it on the surface of the sea.

-

5/14

The screen on the back porch tore last night

When the weather was so bad

My apathetic cat curled up beside me to ride out the storm.

You hated that cat but I called it mine

Long before I was yours.

We built the screen together "like a real couple"

The only project I ever talked you into.

I dreamed that we would sip our coffee in the morning air

Watching sunrise together, the two of us

With the cat purring in my lap.

We never used it once and you called it useless

And I didn't see the point in going out

If we didn't do it together.

But now the screen is ripped, the metal prongs pointed angrily at your chair.

It ripped

And you aren't here to fix it.

Staring here at the hole, sipping my coffee alone with that damn cat pawing at the mosquito that's breached containment

and I can't help but wish it all meant something

In the end.

-

Day 4/14

Of all the insults you've thrown

"Soft" has hurt the most.

To hear that the years of love and laughter

That carved the lines in my cheeks

Were a weakness

Wounds me as much as the slaps you endured

At the hands of people far less soft than I.

In a moment my pain will pass, I know

And pity will set in

At how sad it is that you were raised

To see compassion as a flaw.

-

Day 3/14

Mauve toned lipgloss is all I need

To feel pretty.

But I can't recall when I began to wish for such things

For the stranger's heads to turn

For the too-long glances in the grocery store aisle

For them to dream of me in a new way.

I never cared before but now-

Now their attention is the only way

I feel beautiful anymore.

When I apply it to my lips and blend them with a POP!

I still don't know if I look beautiful for them

Or for me.

-

Day 2/14

I dreamt of a candle in pale hands

With a crimson flame burning down down down

Wax dripping on soft skin

Too gentle for it's heat

But there was no flinch or falter

Until it melted down to nothing

Leaving only a curl of smoke and scalded flesh

As its legacy

-

Day 1/14

I miss the person I was when I wrote poetry. I looked at the world like a love letter addressed to me from something greater, and lately I need that kind of hope in my life.

I will write one poem a day for two weeks in hopes to build a habit and rediscover my spark!

Maybe Icarus had the right idea

That it's okay to burn

For temporary bliss

All I need is a kiss

Cause we're already a match

And I'm soaked to the bone

With kerosene

Snowflakes fell like nimble dancers

Landing softly

Upon your freckled nose

As our laughter fogged

In crisp air

We ran

And nearly slipped

Like a foolish man

Might fall in love

During the wintertime

I used to be a poet once

But now I've lost my spark

The words that once came freely

Are lost now in the dark.

I try not to get discouraged

At this subtle, painful change

But I've become a different person now

Though I yearn to be the same.

Everyone loves the fall, it seems

But nobody ever thinks

About the tragedy befalls

Every fallen leaf

Their blood has been sucked out of them

Like a vampire with it's prey

And their bodies tumble helplessly

Like rain on a chilly day

And that crunching noise you love so much

When you tread upon the leaves?

You're stomping on their skeletons

And crushing skulls beneath your feet.

I look tenderly at the bluebells

For the first time in a while

I hope they know how well they are doing

How fast they are growing

And how beautiful they've become.

I'm back where I belong, it seems

By myself at last.

I tell myself it's what I need

But thoughts are coming fast.

How cute, he got me roses

As if plants could fix this mess

The paleness of the petals

Are completely meaningless.

But still, he bought me flowers

I guess that means he cares

But it takes a little more than that

To make this all seem fair.

Summer is gone

Just a heartbeat away

My life feels empty

As I waste my days

Sitting inside

Seeing no one at all

Maybe life will be easier

At school in the fall

Stars are what I reached for

The ground is what I hit

Life continues to beat me down

Like I don't deserve to live

One day I will die, I know

Till then it's misery

So let's cut out the middleman

And all just cease to be

I’ve grown accustomed to the quiet

That lie beyond my door

So it was all the more 

Disquieting

When I heard voices from the floor

Honesty comes easily

To everyone but me.

I time my words with the waves

And hope they'll get lost at sea.

As a liar and a fraud,

I understand deceit

Yet crave it more than truth

So it is all I seek

Fly, little Icarus

But don't you touch the sun

Your wings may melt and falter

But you are still my son.

I saw you walking as a babe

Your first few tottering steps

And now you soar so high above

But you cannot imagine its depths

So fly, my little Icarus

But fear the sun's hot rays

Your fragile feathers fall apart

And you fall back from whence you came

We are gilded people

Glittering with gold

Which disguises the hatred

And misery

Bubbling beneath our skin

The bloodiest hands

Are those of time.

As it passes

And the seasons change,

All things age

And die.

Im a bit too prideful to admit

That im afraid to say im wrong

But you already knew that, babe

And you have for far too long

I'm a melancholic alcoholic

With a tendency for feeling nauseous

Too much love, too much drink

Provides a space for me to think

But my thoughts flee my mind

As quick as they had come

And I am left alone

With my heart feeling numb

My arm has fallen

Asleep again

Like my mind at 3am.

And I hope by shaking it

Out today

I may save it from needles

And pins

Strings of lights and

Yellow tapestries

Brighten up my room

In an attempt to hide

The darkened mess

That lurks in the corners

I took a train to Amsterdam

To see something that's new

The lull of life had gotten to me

So I got away from you.

The forget-me-nots aren't blooming.

They wither on the sill

No amount of water

Could ressurect them still.

The sunlight shines enough for them,

But all I think to do

Is to let them die right there

Like my relationship with you.

She is like the ocean

Her waves as soft and calm

Brushing my ankles

Like kisses at dawn

She is like the ocean

The towering frozen sea

Where the waves as tall as mountains

Threaten to topple me

She is like the ocean

Dark, at times, but brave

Stronger than I ever was

And soothing through the days

You can only know

The phoenix

From the ash

It leaves behind

A metaphorical

Gun to my head

Threaten a fate

I would rather

Instead

A moment too soon

Or not soon enough

Maybe this metaphor

Is more real

Than I thought