Me On A Girl Scout Trip While Eating Cookies And Watching A Broadway Show: Is That Cocaine?

Incorrect og 6 quotes god I miss them

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Bruce: Natasha, i knight thee in the name of the father-

Steve: *waves*

Bruce: the son-

Thor: *dabs*

Bruce: and the unholy spirit

Tony: *screeching*

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Clint: i may be the worst out of the avengers but i still have the best ass

Steve: that’s not true

Clint: *starts sobbing* i know your ass is amazing

Steve: that’s not what i meant. your ass is great and i value you as a teammate-

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Thor: Fitness tip: never stop pushing yourself. Some say 8 hours of sleep is enough. Why not keep going? Why not 9? Why not 10? Strive for greatness.

Tony: Next time you’re working out do 15 push ups instead of 10. Run 3 miles instead of 2. Eat a whole cake instead of just a slice. Burn your ex’s house down. You can do it. I believe in you.

Clint: There were so many mixed messages in that I can’t-

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Steve: Natasha, keep an eye on Tony today. He's going to say something to the wrong person and get punched.

Natasha: Sure, I’d love to see Tony get punched.

Steve: Try again.

Natasha, sighing: I will stop Tony from getting punched.

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Natasha: Imagine if someone handed you a box full of all the items you have lost throughout your life

Bruce: Self-esteem, haven't seen you in years!

Clint: Oh wow, my childhood innocence! Thank you for finding this!

Thor: I knew I lost that potential somewhere!

Tony: My moral code, is that you?

Steve:

Natasha: I was just gonna show you this cool trunk my sister left me but do you guys need a hug?

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Steve: You're a loose cannon, Tony.

Tony: No, I'm not. I'm a cannon maybe, but a loose cannon? Is that what you think of me?

Natasha: I think you play by your own rules.

Thor: No way, he think rules were made to be broken.

Steve: Those are all attributes of a loose cannon.

Tony: No, I'm just a reckless renegade. Hulk is a loose cannon.

Hulk: *smashes a chair*

The best scene in Moulin Rouge is Backstage Romance. I refuse to take criticism.

AARON FUCKING TIVET IS IN AMERICAN HORROR STORIES AND I DIDN'T REALIZE IT UNTIL NOW

To the guy who approached my dog and I at night and asked to pet her and then understood that her running away with a toy in her mouth did not mean that she wanted to play with you, Thank you.

You know what would really get people off their phones these days?

Public executions.

I hate having functional weakness. I can deal with it in my arms and legs, but I absolutely hate it when it is in my jaw.

I can't talk, eat, or drink and when people talk to me, I seem rude. (Unless I'm with someone who knows about it.)

It drives me nuts.

I just realized that there's a part from In My Dreams that could flow right into Santa Fe.

I've seen flashes of fire, heard the echo of screams, but I still have faith in the truth of my dreams Santa Fe my old friend. I can't spend my whole life dreaming, though I know that's all I seem inclined to do.

I wish I could miss school because of that...

I wouldn't be there the entire year

I am not going to school today because I have “dislocated my entire skeleton” in my sleep.

Forget the new baby smell. New puppy smell is where it's at.

My toxic trait is that if I can't find anything I want to eat, even if I'm hungry, I won't eat at all.