Simon Riley X Reader - Blog Posts

thinking about your older bf!simon that cannot cope with being far from you.

when you’re in the shower, he’s sat on the lid of the toilet on his phone (watching those rug cleaning videos) enjoying your faint singing under the stream of water, the smell of your body wash on the cloud of steam- ready to pass you a towel or get your back.

when you’re at your desk, working from home or studying, he’s just on the other side of it reading the paper with one outstretched leg tangled with both of yours. he’s dead quiet when you’re on a call, just happy to be around.

when you’re doing laundry, collecting the clothes in the hamper and crouching to stuff them into the washer- turning around and accidentally colliding with a thick wall of muscle.

“sorry, love”

he steps aside but you can hear his soft footfalls as he continues to follow you throughout your home.

when you’re both watching something on the couch, what starts as his pinky locked with yours turns into his arm around your waist. that turns into your head on his chest, which culminates with you falling asleep in his lap with his cheek on your head and soft snores emanating from his lips.

when you grocery shop, you push the trolley but his chest is to your back, arms either side of you and hands clasped over yours on the handle. you can thank his military training for his uncanny ability to tell exactly when you’ll stop walking.

when he wakes up in the middle of the night, on a rare occasion when you’ve managed to slip out of bed without him realising, he’s immediately in a panic calling your name.

“in here, my love”

as soon as his heart settles, he realises the bathroom light was probably a dead giveaway. you’re taking a wee, you’ll be back in a minute.

that doesn’t stop a sleepy simon from leaning in the doorframe, shielding his eyes from the big light as he waits for you to finish up.

even on the short walk back to bed, you can feel fingers twisted in the back of your shirt- almost like you’re leading the way.

minute you’re both on the mattress, you’re being wrapped up in his arms, slotting you perfectly into the curve of his front- almost like you’re made for him.

(and you are)

Can't stop thinking about Captain John Price, your good friend's boyfriend, listening to you talk about how you are considering getting a guard dog, and he whole-heartedly agrees with you. John likes you, you're a fantastic friend to his dove and you're sweet, and sweet girls do need protection. So he nods along and tells you he'll look into getting you one, a big one to protect you.

Two weeks later, you're invited to your friend's house, her telling you days before that John might have gotten you a dog, so to prepare! She wasn't sure, he just hinted at it on the phone.

Tell me why, after knocking at your bestie's door, she opens kinda pale and awkward, maybe even a little bit annoyed, inviting you in. Instead of a proper, legit, literal dog, John introduces you to Simon Riley, who stands there awkwardly but tall and intimidating while your friend apologizes, calling her boyfriend an idiot. But John isn't an idiot. For a while now, he thought you'd be perfect for his Lt., this just a funny way to introduce you both. And the only thing that took Simon to agree (after a sharp yet bored no when firstly asked) was to send him a picture of you at a bar, smiling.

Extra:

"So... you come with a leash?" You joke with the tall man, whose eyes wrinkle in amusement. He has been more on the silent side although very atentive, his intense brown eyes on you all evening. Now that you were both alone at the balcony, abandoned by the two love-birds, you tried to ease the tension.

"I don't do leashes but I can pull a spiky collar." He smiles as you giggle. Hell, he felt relief that you did. Even happiness...

"Yeah, it would fit you."

"Yeah?" His voice was low and buttery. "What about a tag with your name on it?" He leans down a little, just enough in your personal bubble, and your stomach flipped. You felt your cheeks warm.

"Can it be heart shaped?" You stare prettily at him and all he can do is to snort to ease the tension.

"However you want it." His reply was quick, eager.

"Deal. But first take me on a proper date."

"Perfect." He smirks.

simon who lets you cry.

simon who sees the same heartbreak he sees in himself, the same desperate need for survival, the desperate need for rest.

simon who understands. he knows you don’t mean it. he knows you can’t control yourself what you snarl and bite. he knows you regret, he understands.

simon who doesn’t shy away when you get mad, when your chest heaves and your eyes narrow. he instead stays, calm hands gentle yet firm, helping you unclench your fists. he kisses the marks your nails leave on your palm.

simon who isn’t frightened, or angry, or upset. simon who understands. who struggles the same way you do.

simon who is there for every up and down, every tear and every smile. he does his research, finds the best techniques and learns them off by heart.

he knows. he understands. no, he isn’t mad. yes, you’re allowed to cry.

childhoodbsf!simon who eventually turns into fwb!simon and inevitably breaks your heart.

warnings : angst(y), mentions of sex but not very detailed, written on iPhone and not proofread

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it happened so naturally.

ever since that blond-haired boy moved across the street from you, and helped you draw a princess maze with pink chalk on the asphalt of the quiet street.

ever since you’d giggled as he dragged you to the little forest at the back of your yard—offering you an entire-day adventure and granting him a respite from the smothering walls of his house.

ever since he’d decided to call you sunshine, because that’s simply what you were to him. his sacred light in the dark storm cloud of his childhood.

ever since then, simon riley had become your very best friend. platonic soulmates, you’d called it.

⸝⸝

it had stuck for a while.

until college and the military rolled around, and suddenly your eyes were yearning for him nearly as often as your fragile heart.

suddenly, it didn’t feel so platonic.

there was still this easiness, that was undeniable—you still trudged into the tattoo shop with him every other month or sometimes week, watching as the needle danced across his thick biceps the same way your fingers longed to.

you still let your head loll on simon’s lap as he forced yet another painfully boring movie on you.

he still pushed your thighs apart and muffled his face in your tummy when you rioted and a romcom ended up playing on his obnoxiously big flat screen.

the same boy from your childhood grunted if your fingers weren’t carding through his dirty-blond locks within the minute.

⸝⸝

and then one day, somehow, after yet another failed date—because all those boys were lacking something, some spark—you found yourself at his flat.

he’d opened the door, clad in just boxers and the gray, army-issued t-shirt with his last name plastered on the back. it made that familiar sizzle run up the length of your spine before tingling at the back of your skull like a firework.

he’d hugged you like he’d done a million times before.

had stroked the length of your hair, the way you liked.

had talked to you softly, the way you needed.

had kissed your temple, the way you craved.

it had happened naturally then too. the push up to your tiptoes and the search of your doe eyes with his whiskey ones. your own were pleading, that much you knew. his thumb had grazed your cheekbone tenderly, prompting a chain reaction that inevitably ended in a tangle of limbs and messy navy sheets.

after that initial detonation, it had happened again and again and again—though it was all as friends. a good arrangement really, if one wasn’t in love with the man who fucked them on the regular.

which you were currently admitting to yourself, while simon—your simon—was buried deep inside you. deeper than anyone else ever had or ever could. deeper than just physical.

“si- look at me.”

it was a futile ask. you knew it all too well. those whiskey eyes never met yours when he was taking you.

“hm. can’t pretty girl. y’feel too fuckin’ good, sunshine,” he grunted.

it was half a lie. because while you did feel like heaven clutching him, that wasn’t fully why he could never meet your glazed doe eyes.

the truth was lodged somewhere deep between his ribs, in that sensitive spot where he kept very few things—like his mom, his baby brother, and you.

and if he met your eyes when he was deep inside your velvet heat, not only would he finish too early, but he’d want to keep you forever. which is something he refused to do.

even if it broke his heart when—after you’d both reached your peaks in a slow, deep, long orgasm—your nimble fingers curled around his dog tags. so goddamn reverent, that touch of yours. it undid him.

your manicured thumb brushed the indentation of his name in the metal plate, and those three little words slipped out of you like you’d always said them with this much meaning. they’d grown too heavy, too real for your body to be able to hold them back anymore. it was the softest, most honest i love you you’d ever said.

simon had frozen, spine rigid even if he’d known—he’d known it was coming.

so when he’d bent down, gently sliding out of you as he pressed his shaking lips to your forehead, tears fell quietly from the corners of your eyes. the same ones he’d lifted so often before, whether it be with a stupid joke or a smug smirk.

you knew too, right then, that he wouldn’t say it back.

that this was the last time. that this was the most you’d get from him.

a single hiccup wracked your throat, which simon eased the only way he knew how—with a familiar, smoothing hand over your hair. he rolled off his bed shortly after, his rippling back to you as he walked into his en suite bathroom.

when he came back out, minutes or hours later he wasn’t sure, with his bare feet dragging across the cold tiles, you were gone.

prompted by sheer agony, simon had almost laughed.

because even if you’d left, you were still everywhere.

his pillows smelled of those expensive shampoo and conditioner you loved, the ones that made your hair all soft and silky. his sheets smelled of vanilla and coconut, same as his cotton t-shirts, which you’d been borrowing since your teenage years.

hell, even his ribs throbbed. right where the fine-line sunshine was inked permanently.

the worst is that he was okay with it. the ache. the pain. it was familiar. bitterly comfortable.

a part of him had always known—even when he’d picked up that pink chalk more than a decade ago—that the sweet girl across the street would haunt him forever.

but he’d suffer your absence a thousand lifetimes over, as long as it meant the ghosts of his own demons could never reach you. could never snuff out that golden light he’d fallen irrevocably in love with.

because that instinct—to protect his sunny girl no matter the cost—had always happened so naturally.

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ᝰ.ᐟ author’s note

hii! okay so this is my first simon riley drabble (and my first ever published piece really lol), so if it sucks please bear with me :*)

idk if this is anything—but i had a 3 hour road trip, 5 hours of sleep, and this wouldn’t leave my head so here it is!

Constellations of Love

Simon riley x reader | fluff |  Warnings: none  I was listening to “your universe” by Rico Blanco and i can’t help but to think about Ghost :( 

In the shadowed side of dangerous missions, Simon "Ghost" Riley was a beacon of enigma. With a reputation that whispered of mysterious and skillful, he moved through the shadows with a grace that seemed unchallenging. But beneath the tactical facade, even a soldier like Ghost yearned for love that transcended the havoc.

Among the chaos of a world teetering on the edge, You his darling who stood as a brilliant support and light that Ghost found himself uncontrollably  drawn to. The danger was always present, but so was the undeniable connection of shared laughter, quiet conversations, and stolen moments of vulnerability. It was a fragile balance, a dance between a fierce commitment to duty and the yearning for something more.

 Ghost found himself seated beside you, your forms illuminated by the soft glow of the moon. The crackle of the campfire serenaded your words, as you spoke of dreams that would exist if you weren’t in the military.

“I'll ask the stars above, 'How did I win your love?”

The words were a reflection of Simon’s own thoughts, a feeling he had never dared to voice. His eyes met yours, and in that instant, the veil of invincibility that he often wore shattered, revealing the man who longed for love as deeply as anyone else no matter how he rejected affection.

You two shared a comfortable silence, you never answered his question because you know that deep down he knows the answer. the crackling fire seemed to fade into the background, leaving only the symphony of emotions that lingered between the two of you. Ghost's gloved hand found yours, fingers intertwining as if in silent agreement that the world could wait, just for a moment.

“I don't think that you even realize the joy you make me feel when I'm inside your universe” you gripped into his hand as if he’ll let go. 

Ghost had always thought that he will never find someone, but you had proven otherwise. In the heart of uncertainty, you had become the steadfast star in his sky.

In a world where danger was everywhere and tomorrow was never guaranteed, you and Simon found a connection that defied the odds. Through whispered conversations and fleeting touches, they formed a bond that transcended the chaos of reality.

Ghost leaned in, his lips brushing against yours in a promise that needed no words. In the constellations of the night sky, amidst the commotion  of the world, love had found its place—a universe between the two of you.

"𝐓𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮"

Simon Riley x Reader |Fluff|

The sun has finally started to dip below the horizon, casting a golden glow all over Manchester as you stood in your balcony. The gentle breezed ruffled your hair while taking a deep breath, inhaling the familiar scent of your surroundings. This was your only way of relief, your escape from the chaos of your own life.

You knew you weren't alone on that balcony as you heard familiar footsteps approaching. It was Simon. He stood beside you, his silhouette sharply delineated against the colorful sky. His blue eyes gazed into the distance, and you could sense the weight of his thoughts. Simon was man of a few words, though his actions spoke louder.

"You come here often?" he finally spoke, breaking the comfortable silence between the two of you.

You shrugged, a small smile painted on you lips. "Whenever the world becomes too much."

He nodded in response, his gaze never leaving the view. "I get that."

Once again the two of you stood there for a while, sharing the comfortable silence that you two cherish the most. You and Simon went through so much together, seen the darkest sides of the world, faced so many ups and downs and grew stronger each time. There was this bond between the two of you, unspoken and unbreakable.

As the last traces of daylight fade, you turn to face Simon, eyes meeting each others, and for a moment, you felt like you two were the only people in the world. You reached your hand out to gently hold on to his arm, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath your fingertips.

"Hey" you said softly, "you know you can always talk t'me right?"

Simon's jaw tensed slightly, you can see the hurt in his eyes. Simon was a pro at hiding his emotions, but you had learned to read subtle cues that betrayed his own feelings.

"i know" he responded, his voice barely above a whisper. "Its just hard finding the right words."

You softly squeezed his arm "you dont have to find the perfect words. Just tell me and i'll listen."

He hesitated for a moment before letting out a sigh and he finally opened up to you.

Your heart ached for him, for the burdens he carried. You stepped closer, wrapping your arms around him in a gentle hug. He returned the embrace, his grip firm and comforting.

"Simon, your not defined by your past." you whispered your soft reassurance against his ear. "You've saved countless lives, including mine. Your a hero. My hero."

He pulled away slightly, his eyes searching yours. "And what about you? you faced danger as much as i have."

You smiled, brushing a strand of his hair out of his eyes. "im just a regular person trying to make a difference, but having you by my side makes everything less scary."

Simon's lips curved into a smile, as he reached up to cup your cheeks, thumb brushing against your skin. "You have a way of making even the darkest moments seem brighter."

The atmosphere between the two of you was charged with unspoken words, emotion swirling in the space between your bodies.

When you finally pulled away from the embrace Simon's eye held a mixture of suprise and something else—a vulnerability that he rarely showed. You smiled, your heart swelling with affection for the man who had become your anchor in your world full of chaos.

"sometimes," you murmured, "all it takes is one person to remind you that your not alone."

Simon nodded, his hands still resting against your cheeks. "And your the right person for me."

You leaned to his touch, savoring the warmth that he provided with his hands. You two didn't need grand gestures to elaborate confessions; this moment, this connection said it all.

Both of you knew theres still more challenges to come ahead, but as long as you've got each other, there was nothing that could break the two of you.

And at that fleeting moment, as you stood side by side, the weight of the world seems a little lighter. There was a void you didn't know needed filling. And now that you found each other, that void is filled.

"𝙄 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙚"

Simon "Ghost" Riley x Reader |Angst?| Warning: Mentions of death ( this isn't proofread and this is so poorly written)

The battlefield was chaotic with all of the gunfire and explosions. Ghost moved swiftly as he tried clear out every area that can be a possible enemy hideout. You and him were both determined to find victory in this mission. Though, in the back of Ghost's mind, he couldn't shake the bad feeling of you getting hurt.

As Ghost fought through the hostile forces, something rang in his earpiece. It was your voice, weak and strained. "Lt.... i need help.."

Fear gripped Ghost's heart. The last time he felt this feeling was when he was a little boy, hiding from the wrath of his father.

He sprinted towards the source of the signal. Each step felt like an eternity, his mind and his heart was racing. He couldn't help but think about the countless missions you both had to go through. He was always there for you, always ready to catch you when you fall. But this time it's different.

Finally, he reached a dimly lit alley where he found your almost lifeless form, struggling to stay conscious. Your blood pooling into the ground with a faint smile on your lips as your eyes met his.

"My Simon" you called out his name, barely above a whisper.

Ghost hurriedly rushed to your side, dropping his knees. He scanned your injuries while trying to comprehend everything that's happening. "Hang on love, I'll get you outta here." his voice cracked.

"Simon, It's too late for me. You have to go" you weakly held Simon's hand.

"No, [Name] i wont leave you here." Ghost spoke out, his voice trembling with emotion. He couldn't afford to lose you. You were the most important thing that came in to his life, You were the only one he had left; the only one who saw him as Simon.

With every ounce of strength he had to muster, Ghost carried you to safety, trying to shield you from any possible threats along the way, while he contacted the rest of the 141.

As both of you reach the extraction point, you smiled at Ghost "Your always the stubborn one" your voice barely audible. "Take good care of yourself yeah?"

"Don't talk like that." Simon pleaded, his heart breaking at the sight of you. "Your going to make it. You have to."

You reached up gently touched his cheek "Remember the promises we made? that... no one was going to be left behind"

Your words struck into Ghost's heart. He couldn't save you this time.

"Promise me Simon. Promise me that you'll be takin' care of yourself, even if im gone." you spoke out. Ghost didnt say a word but he simply took off his blacalava and rested his forehead with yours.

"I love you, Si"

"I love you too."

----- ✧⁠*° -----

Days, months and even years have passed, Simon still feels the weight and grief of your loss. He tried to keep the promise of taking care of himself but, he just can't. Without you he's nothing.

He would visit your grave daily, talking about everything. The little things he saw that reminded him of you, the way he kept all your belongings in his place. The pain of losing you never subsided but he knew he had to keep going, he had to live for you.

"I promise, [name]. I'll never forget you. I promise that i'll keep you in my heart forever."

Simon who never hesitates to call or message you whenever he's out with the 141

Simon who would admire you from afar whenever your busy doing smth

Simon who would squeeze you into embrace whenever he comes home as if theres no tomorrow

and the very same Simon you plan your happy ending with.

Hello! I am back and I have more headcannons. So yay! We have some more fluffy headcannons to apolagize for the other ones! I am opening the ask box if anyone wants to request something

Anyway!

How tf141 would comfort you/help you after a hell week <3

Soap would definitely be a bit overbearing, but still very helpful and comforting. My man has been prepped for just such an occasion for months. Despite being loud and generally rambunctious, he would definently tone it down or leave you alone entirely if that's what you needed. However! If you need a distraction, he is ready and primed with a whole yap fest about his latest fixation. If somehow your comfort food and snacks is out, you best believe is is running to the nearest store to buy some. Favorite blanket? Freshly washed and warm from the dryer. Comfort show already on the tv. And from advice from his Ma and sisters, all the chores and errands are already done. "Just let me take care of ye, alright?"

Price is internally panicking. He does not want to neglect you. At all. As such, maybe a bit overbearing. Very hands on, I think. Massaging whatever aches, his hands slightly rough but incredibly warm. Has a bath prepped, full of bubbles and your favorite bath bomb. Bought a few asthetic little lamps just so you could relax without the big light on. This man cooks too. Your favorite meal ready by the time you came out. And if it was a food unfamiliar to him, or a family recipie? Don't worry, he's been practicing for weeks. Sneaky bastard. Suprises you by doing a little task around the house that you've been meaning to do but have been putting off.

Ghost. Oh my poor boy. Doesn't know what to do. At all. Or, at least he thinks he doesn't. But he does order in your takeout. Shuts up until you tell him to say something because he knows how too much noise gets on his nerves when he's spread too thin. Gives you his hoodie, still warm from his skin. He puts on your preferred show, and lets you use him as a stressball. Let's you get all of your aggression out on him. Afterall, "I can take it luvie."

Gaz is determined to make you feel better by the end of the night. Like Soap, he also gets the chores and errands done. Doesn't mind one bit if you ask him for some alone time. Uses his time out of the house to buy you some flowers, your favorite little treat; pastry, drink or candy. Picks up take-away on his way home too. He's the one to drag you out of the house on a walk, claiming that it'll make you feel better. Listens to you rant about what's wrong the entire time. Definitely one to ask "you want solutions, or do you just want me to listen?"

the binge read is so good but i need to wake up in five hours so. tRUST this will be dealt with

Summary: Task Force 141 operates successfully without an omega, at least that’s what Price has been saying since its formation. Two alphas and two betas balance the pack just fine, and they have the numbers to prove it.

It works for a while, until the Omega Initiative is born and the 141 find themselves having to adjust to the sudden addition of an omega to their pack. Fresh out of an institute, you’re hardly fit for their secretive, dangerous world, or so Price thinks. 

As each member of the team gets closer to you, things begin to come to light, not only about you but about the decision to force you into their lives.

Maybe, just maybe, Price was wrong and the 141 does need an omega after all. 

Pairings: Poly 141 x reader, Price x Gaz, Ghost x Soap

Warnings: Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics, NSFW content, explicit smut, fingering, oral (m and f receiving), knotting, biting, claiming, mating cycles, Alternate Universe, a/b/o typical classism and sexism, age differences, military inaccuracies, canon typical violence, blood, weapons, language, no use of Y/N, brief torture, hurt/comfort, let's be real this is so unrealistic but it's a/b/o you're not here for accuracy.

Chapters containing smut are marked with a *

This fic can also be found on my Ao3 -> HERE

I will no longer be using a taglist for this fic, please follow THIS BLOG and turn on notifications

**This fic is currently in progress**

NAVIGATION PAGE

CRCB DIRECTORY

Part 1 - The Omega

Chapter 1 - The Introduction

Chapter 2 - Adjustments

Chapter 3 - Speak Their Language

Chapter 4 - You Can Be Useful

Chapter 5 - What I Want *

Part 2 - The Bond

Chapter 6 - One Step Closer *

Chapter 7 - Sweet Strawberry

Chapter 8 - The Thing About Ghost

Chapter 9 - Save Me

Chapter 10 - Treat Me Gently*

Part 3 - The First Heat

Chapter 11 - It's Coming

Chapter 12 - Fire In My Veins*

Chapter 13 - Piece Me Back Together*

Chapter 14 - The Aftermath*

Part 4 - The New Normal

Chapter 15: Bonnie*

Chapter 16: Big Brown Eyes *

Chapter 17: Alone

Chapter 18: Don't Let Me Go

Chapter 19: Daddy Issues

Chapter 20: The New Normal *

Chapter 21: Crime and Punishment *

Chapter 22: I Won't Be Gentle

Part 5 - A Pack of Five

Chapter 23: Regrets

Chapter 24: The Last First Time *

Chapter 25: Animals *

Chapter 26: Fuck *

Chapter 27: Drown In It *

Chapter 28: Two Is Company, Three Is A Party *

Chapter 29: There's Something Wrong With My Omega

Part 6 - The Tragedy

Chapter 30: Butterfly's Wings

Chapter 31: Forced Proximity

Chapter 32: The Tragedy

Chapter 33: Ghosts of the Past

Chapter 34: The Whole Truth

Part 7 - The Aftermath

Chapter 35: Threads

Chapter 36: To The Sea

Chapter 37: The Silence

Chapter 38: Shattered

Chapter 39: Life

Part 8 - The Next Chapter

Chapter 40: Where Do We Go From Here

Chapter 41: Revenge

Chapter 42: Comfort and Joy

Chapter 43: Lies

Chapter 44: Little Shit

Chapter 45: Heat of the Moment *

Chapter 46: My Girl *

Chapter 47: The Reunion

Chapter 48: Wild Times *

Chapter 49: Reforming Bonds *

Chapter 50: Flashback *

Part 9 - Finding Home

Title card made by the beautiful @141wh0re

Chapter 51: Back To The Start

Chapter 52: The Rucking Princess

Simon Riley’s little “quirks”

A/N this is just a bunch of random weird things that I think Simon does

Warnings: Just a bunch of swearing and mentions of guns

🕷️ the bitch thinks bugs are so cool. Like actually has a soft spot of all animals but bugs are his favorite

🕷️ doesn’t care what kind. If he sees one on a mission he’ll just glance at it and smile under his mask

🕷️ twirls his handgun on his finger all the time. Like no reason he just does

🕷️ the one animal he hates are giraffes. He can’t understand why a mammal has to have such a long ass neck. 🕷️ Dino nerd when he was little. When he goes home he has bins of his old Dino merch from when he was younger and sometimes he’ll take it out and look through everything

🕷️ hates babies. Can’t stand them. At all. They cry too much and they look weird to him. 🕷️ he’ll just zone out sometimes and then soap will wave a hand in front of his face and he’ll just grunt and say “I heard what you were saying dumbass.” 🕷️ actually kinda likes coffee. But it needs to have a lot of creamer or sugar or something. Won’t drink it black. Too bitter

🕷️ huge on mental health for his friends, sucks with his own. He just needs a kiss.

im desperate to find an oneshot i loved but I CNAT FIND IT OMG im going to pull all my hair to the point i become bald

A series of sketches done in the last few weeks with my latest obsession🔥

Hoping to post some finished artwork soon

simon’s lover calls him bub.

“love you, bub.”

“s’okay, bub. don’t worry about it.”

“how was your day, bub?”

and he grumbles. says pet names are corny but at least it’s not baby or babe.

but the second you call him simon, he’s on alert. back straightening, ears going hot, hands clamming, and going into a panic.

his brows furrowed as he approached you, looking almost nervous.

“can you get me a water, please?”

and he does it, goes through the motions but he’s so in his head. why the fuck did you call him by his name?

downright pouting and petulant when he plunks down next to you. his confusion so palpable you feel it. even turn to him and ask what’s wrong but all he does is shrug. “s’nothin’.”

your eyes narrow but you nod nonetheless. turning back to what you were doing. but before you know it, he’s huffing.

“s’alright for you to keep callin’ me bub. or whatever shite you want.”

and you have to stifle your laugh because of course, of course!

“thanks for the water, bub.”

Through Me (The Flood) - secret baby fic Simon Riley / female reader

You have no idea Simon’s rented a flat the next block over.

It’s the quickest walk, from your place to his, and he makes it frequently, especially at night.

You don’t know he stands in the shadow of a tree, waiting for your lights to flick on and off. On, and off, all night long.

Orion keeps you up, he knows without a doubt now. The tired eyes and tired smile you gave him the other day when he fixed the washer filled him with shame, miserable and scalding, a burn searing across his heart.

He gave you a baby, and then disappeared.

He estimates you get up every three hours. The dim, muted light from your bedroom window flickers alive, and then the living room follows shortly after.

If he was there, things would be different. He’d get up with Ry, get him tucked into bed beside you, snuggled up to your breast. He’d rub the apple of your cheek to gently wake you, just enough so you’d know what’s going on, but not enough to truly open your eyes. You would trust him, trust him to take care of you, and the baby, trust that he’s there. You’d be half asleep as he pulled your tank top down and helped Orion latch, half asleep when Simon turned you in the bed so the baby could switch, Simon’s chest warm at your back, his hand holding Orion steady. He’d stay awake and vigilant until he was done eating, burped, changed, and settled back into his crib. He’d kiss you afterwards, long and sweet, and then press his nose to your hair and breathe deeply, before waking up to do it all over again in three hours.

It’s all a fantasy, a secret dream he’s built and tucked away in his mind-

but it will all be real. Soon.

He starts with a dinner.

It’s around six when he strolls up to your front door. He’s got two orders of takeaway fish and chips, a favorite of yours (he remembers) and a strawberry mango smoothie (he’s not sure if you like these or not, if he’s being honest, but he knows nutrition is important right now. The internet says you’re burning a lot of calories, but you also need more sustenance and nutrient rich foods.)

You’re surprised to see him, when you open the door, too big sweatshirt rolled up at the sleeves, ratty shorts raw hemmed between your legs. He enjoys the way your thighs touch, how they press together, and remembers them as warm and soft. He’s (not so secretly, based on your first night together) pleased by your body. Soft and sweet and curved, but strong too, strong enough you made him a baby, to be a home to his son. And to him.

His favorite little kitten.

Your eyebrows crease together achingly slow as you take him in, and the spot the takeaway bag. You point to it, small smile twisting your lips. “You brought me food?”

“Need ta make sure you’re eatin’ enough.” He grunts, and then steps closer, crosses the threshold, herding you inside with a hand on your hip. He does a preliminary sweep of the flat, and then sets the bag and smoothie on your kitchen counter. “Baby asleep?”

“Just went down.” You sigh, leaning backward against the cool tile. “Was really fightin’ it today. I’m hoping he’ll sleep for more than the usual two, three hours he’s been getting.” Your head tips back into the cabinet, exposing the vulnerable marrow of your throat, and you roll, glancing at the plastic cup filled with cold pink slime. “And a smoothie?” He chuckles.

“Wasn’t sure ah, if you liked ‘em or not but… it looked good.” You glance at your feet, sweet smile shyly peeking at him.

“Thank you.” You whisper. Your voice is thick, trembling on the last vowel, and his stomach pitches. “It’s… really nice of you, Simon. To bring me food. I…” you glance up, eyes full of tears, and he’s drawn towards you like a magnet. “It was really hard today.” Your voice cracks.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay.” He tugs you into his chest, palm stroking slowly over the back of your head. “I know it is, mama. I know. It’s okay.”

“It’s not.” You sniffle against him. “It’s s-so hard, and I’m like… I’m not even a human- I’m j-just like a milk machine and I can’t sleep and can’t leave this flat. I feel like I’m failing, like I’m doing everything wrong and I’m leaking and I-“

“Okay, shhhh. It’s okay.” His arms tighten around you, nose skimming along the top of your head. “I’ve got you, c’mere.” He cradles your cheeks, tilting you upwards to look at him. “You’re not failing, you’re doing a great job. Orion is safe, and happy, and healthy. You’re healthy, and safe,” he wipes the tear rolling down your cheek. “and we’ll work on the happy part.” He takes a deep breath. “‘m gonna take some leave, be around for a bit. I’ll be here, to help.”

“You don’t have-“

“I want to be here sweetheart. I wish I had been here all along.” He’s earnest in his plea and hopes you can see, all the things he wants to give you, all the things he’ll do. The space in his heart he’s carved away for you, for Ry. The aching sore spot under his ribs that aches when he’s away from you. “Alright? I’ll be right here.” He pulls your hand into his, and then up to his face, dotting his lips across your palm, promise whispered away into your skin. “I’m right here, mama. I’m going to take care of you, of both of you, okay?” You close your eyes, take a deep breath.

“Okay.”