I Should Probably Delete This Later - Blog Posts

Sometimes depression looks like laying under a weighted blanket with your blackout curtains closed other times I’m asleep

Constellations of Love

Simon riley x reader | fluff |  Warnings: none  I was listening to “your universe” by Rico Blanco and i can’t help but to think about Ghost :( 

In the shadowed side of dangerous missions, Simon "Ghost" Riley was a beacon of enigma. With a reputation that whispered of mysterious and skillful, he moved through the shadows with a grace that seemed unchallenging. But beneath the tactical facade, even a soldier like Ghost yearned for love that transcended the havoc.

Among the chaos of a world teetering on the edge, You his darling who stood as a brilliant support and light that Ghost found himself uncontrollably  drawn to. The danger was always present, but so was the undeniable connection of shared laughter, quiet conversations, and stolen moments of vulnerability. It was a fragile balance, a dance between a fierce commitment to duty and the yearning for something more.

 Ghost found himself seated beside you, your forms illuminated by the soft glow of the moon. The crackle of the campfire serenaded your words, as you spoke of dreams that would exist if you weren’t in the military.

“I'll ask the stars above, 'How did I win your love?”

The words were a reflection of Simon’s own thoughts, a feeling he had never dared to voice. His eyes met yours, and in that instant, the veil of invincibility that he often wore shattered, revealing the man who longed for love as deeply as anyone else no matter how he rejected affection.

You two shared a comfortable silence, you never answered his question because you know that deep down he knows the answer. the crackling fire seemed to fade into the background, leaving only the symphony of emotions that lingered between the two of you. Ghost's gloved hand found yours, fingers intertwining as if in silent agreement that the world could wait, just for a moment.

“I don't think that you even realize the joy you make me feel when I'm inside your universe” you gripped into his hand as if he’ll let go. 

Ghost had always thought that he will never find someone, but you had proven otherwise. In the heart of uncertainty, you had become the steadfast star in his sky.

In a world where danger was everywhere and tomorrow was never guaranteed, you and Simon found a connection that defied the odds. Through whispered conversations and fleeting touches, they formed a bond that transcended the chaos of reality.

Ghost leaned in, his lips brushing against yours in a promise that needed no words. In the constellations of the night sky, amidst the commotion  of the world, love had found its place—a universe between the two of you.

"𝐓𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐲𝐨𝐮"

Simon Riley x Reader |Fluff|

The sun has finally started to dip below the horizon, casting a golden glow all over Manchester as you stood in your balcony. The gentle breezed ruffled your hair while taking a deep breath, inhaling the familiar scent of your surroundings. This was your only way of relief, your escape from the chaos of your own life.

You knew you weren't alone on that balcony as you heard familiar footsteps approaching. It was Simon. He stood beside you, his silhouette sharply delineated against the colorful sky. His blue eyes gazed into the distance, and you could sense the weight of his thoughts. Simon was man of a few words, though his actions spoke louder.

"You come here often?" he finally spoke, breaking the comfortable silence between the two of you.

You shrugged, a small smile painted on you lips. "Whenever the world becomes too much."

He nodded in response, his gaze never leaving the view. "I get that."

Once again the two of you stood there for a while, sharing the comfortable silence that you two cherish the most. You and Simon went through so much together, seen the darkest sides of the world, faced so many ups and downs and grew stronger each time. There was this bond between the two of you, unspoken and unbreakable.

As the last traces of daylight fade, you turn to face Simon, eyes meeting each others, and for a moment, you felt like you two were the only people in the world. You reached your hand out to gently hold on to his arm, feeling the warmth of his skin beneath your fingertips.

"Hey" you said softly, "you know you can always talk t'me right?"

Simon's jaw tensed slightly, you can see the hurt in his eyes. Simon was a pro at hiding his emotions, but you had learned to read subtle cues that betrayed his own feelings.

"i know" he responded, his voice barely above a whisper. "Its just hard finding the right words."

You softly squeezed his arm "you dont have to find the perfect words. Just tell me and i'll listen."

He hesitated for a moment before letting out a sigh and he finally opened up to you.

Your heart ached for him, for the burdens he carried. You stepped closer, wrapping your arms around him in a gentle hug. He returned the embrace, his grip firm and comforting.

"Simon, your not defined by your past." you whispered your soft reassurance against his ear. "You've saved countless lives, including mine. Your a hero. My hero."

He pulled away slightly, his eyes searching yours. "And what about you? you faced danger as much as i have."

You smiled, brushing a strand of his hair out of his eyes. "im just a regular person trying to make a difference, but having you by my side makes everything less scary."

Simon's lips curved into a smile, as he reached up to cup your cheeks, thumb brushing against your skin. "You have a way of making even the darkest moments seem brighter."

The atmosphere between the two of you was charged with unspoken words, emotion swirling in the space between your bodies.

When you finally pulled away from the embrace Simon's eye held a mixture of suprise and something else—a vulnerability that he rarely showed. You smiled, your heart swelling with affection for the man who had become your anchor in your world full of chaos.

"sometimes," you murmured, "all it takes is one person to remind you that your not alone."

Simon nodded, his hands still resting against your cheeks. "And your the right person for me."

You leaned to his touch, savoring the warmth that he provided with his hands. You two didn't need grand gestures to elaborate confessions; this moment, this connection said it all.

Both of you knew theres still more challenges to come ahead, but as long as you've got each other, there was nothing that could break the two of you.

And at that fleeting moment, as you stood side by side, the weight of the world seems a little lighter. There was a void you didn't know needed filling. And now that you found each other, that void is filled.

"𝙄 𝙥𝙧𝙤𝙢𝙞𝙨𝙚"

Simon "Ghost" Riley x Reader |Angst?| Warning: Mentions of death ( this isn't proofread and this is so poorly written)

The battlefield was chaotic with all of the gunfire and explosions. Ghost moved swiftly as he tried clear out every area that can be a possible enemy hideout. You and him were both determined to find victory in this mission. Though, in the back of Ghost's mind, he couldn't shake the bad feeling of you getting hurt.

As Ghost fought through the hostile forces, something rang in his earpiece. It was your voice, weak and strained. "Lt.... i need help.."

Fear gripped Ghost's heart. The last time he felt this feeling was when he was a little boy, hiding from the wrath of his father.

He sprinted towards the source of the signal. Each step felt like an eternity, his mind and his heart was racing. He couldn't help but think about the countless missions you both had to go through. He was always there for you, always ready to catch you when you fall. But this time it's different.

Finally, he reached a dimly lit alley where he found your almost lifeless form, struggling to stay conscious. Your blood pooling into the ground with a faint smile on your lips as your eyes met his.

"My Simon" you called out his name, barely above a whisper.

Ghost hurriedly rushed to your side, dropping his knees. He scanned your injuries while trying to comprehend everything that's happening. "Hang on love, I'll get you outta here." his voice cracked.

"Simon, It's too late for me. You have to go" you weakly held Simon's hand.

"No, [Name] i wont leave you here." Ghost spoke out, his voice trembling with emotion. He couldn't afford to lose you. You were the most important thing that came in to his life, You were the only one he had left; the only one who saw him as Simon.

With every ounce of strength he had to muster, Ghost carried you to safety, trying to shield you from any possible threats along the way, while he contacted the rest of the 141.

As both of you reach the extraction point, you smiled at Ghost "Your always the stubborn one" your voice barely audible. "Take good care of yourself yeah?"

"Don't talk like that." Simon pleaded, his heart breaking at the sight of you. "Your going to make it. You have to."

You reached up gently touched his cheek "Remember the promises we made? that... no one was going to be left behind"

Your words struck into Ghost's heart. He couldn't save you this time.

"Promise me Simon. Promise me that you'll be takin' care of yourself, even if im gone." you spoke out. Ghost didnt say a word but he simply took off his blacalava and rested his forehead with yours.

"I love you, Si"

"I love you too."

----- ✧⁠*° -----

Days, months and even years have passed, Simon still feels the weight and grief of your loss. He tried to keep the promise of taking care of himself but, he just can't. Without you he's nothing.

He would visit your grave daily, talking about everything. The little things he saw that reminded him of you, the way he kept all your belongings in his place. The pain of losing you never subsided but he knew he had to keep going, he had to live for you.

"I promise, [name]. I'll never forget you. I promise that i'll keep you in my heart forever."

Simon who never hesitates to call or message you whenever he's out with the 141

Simon who would admire you from afar whenever your busy doing smth

Simon who would squeeze you into embrace whenever he comes home as if theres no tomorrow

and the very same Simon you plan your happy ending with.