Jean Kirstein X Reader - Blog Posts

•No existe la discreción con él. Si le gustas te lo hará saber.

•Alardear de sus magníficas cualidades (mayormente físicas) es su carta estrella para conquistarte.

•Es una fachada, en realidad no tiene ninguna experiencia en el ámbito romántico.

•Entonces, no te dejes engañar por esa personalidad orgullosa y atrevida, en el momento en que respondas a sus insinuaciones encontrarás a un joven tímido y avergonzado.

•Mucho coqueteo y poca acción por parte suya.

•Descarado, le gusta presumir de su relación a todo aquel que esté dispuesto a escuchar (incluso con los que no están dispuestos).

•Es todo o nada, mucho afecto, muchos regalos, muchas citas y lo más importante, él mismo.

•Muy dramático, sería un gran actor.

•Un poco celoso, ten en cuenta que si no se lo reprochas sólo reforzarás la conducta.

•Gran probabilidad de que desarrolle dependencia emocional, pero con algo de consuelo se soluciona.

•Es la mejor oportunidad de tu vida, no la desperdiciarás sólo por algunos aspectos negativos, ¿verdad?

•Reo Mikage, Michael Kaiser, Draco Malfoy, Jean Kirstein, Leon Kuwata...

Song of the day!! 🤍💜

Song the day!! 🤍💜

Valentine Headcanons about (almost) every fictional character I love 💕 

happy Valentine’s Day to everyone! I hope you know you are appreciated and cared for! Here are some Headcanons on how my fictional crushes would spend Valentine’s Day 💓

featuring: Daiki aomine, Sasuke Uchiha, Takumi Fujiwara, Rindou Haitani, Jean Kirstein, Ryusui Nanami, Spike Spiegel, Hisashi Mistui, Matt Holt, Taehoon Seong, and Damian Wayne

Daiki Aomine:

He’s playing basketball 💀

You’re 100000% sure he forgot what today was because when you gave him a handmade lunch AND a net for catching bugs he just stares at it like “what is this for?”

So as you sadly sit on the bench watching him play

But then he falls idiot

You sigh and walk over to him. “You ok Daiki?”

He groans and kneels with a bracelet in his hand blushing

“H-happy Valentine’s Day…”

You’re speechless. Only for a short moment of course, you quickly begin laughing your ass off

“W-what’s so funny?! Damn Kise telling me to do dumb shit…”

“I love it Daiki! Where’d you get it?” 

“S-satski taught me…”

This man has the largest amount of pride but will always throw it aside for you!

Sasuke Uchiha:

You both would either stay home or be somewhere private 

You both have this secret spot in the woods that you guys have been going to ever since you were kids

So it’s no surprise on your 15th valentines together that’s where the two of you would be

With the little snacks and dinner entrees the both of you made to surprise each other and the nice lighting and river it was perfect

This is also the time he’s most vulnerable with you; kissing your hands, neck, cheek, arms, and of course your lips ;)

He whispers sweet things in your ear and tells you how he’s never loved like this and won’t with anyone else 

“You’re my everything (y/n). I look at you and see a future brighter than all the stars out tonight.”

It’s safe to say he only and will only ever love you

Takumi Fujiwara:

You’ve always went on Tofu runs when you could with Takumi, and it was no different for Valentine’s Day 

When he arrives at your house he’s standing there with a small bouquet 

“Is there anything you want to do today?” He asks you as he drives to the hotel

You shake your head. “It doesn’t really matter as long as I’m with you!”

He can’t help but smile

When he’s done with the deliveries he pulls into a parking lot in front of Lake Akina 

“Can w-we just sit here for a while then? I really just want to be with you.”

You smile at him and lean your head as close as you can to his shoulder. “I’d love that Takumi.”

Rindou Haitani:

Rindou takes you dancing

You both love to dance so it was a win

But of course after that he takes you home

You both cuddle on each other and watch random movies

Rindou has the finest liquor out and the sweetest chocolate and all your other favorite sweets 

He kisses up and down your shoulder as you sit in his lap holding one of his hands

“You’re mine (y/n). And you’re gonna be for my next valentine and the one after that…”

Jean Kirstein 

He cooks for you!

He makes you sit there patiently while he scrambles around creating the perfect meal

“Jean, i don’t mind helping you. I think it’ll be a lot easier if-“

“I got this (y/n)! Just sit there and look beautiful! Tell me about your day. You know I love to hear your voice.”

After he’s FINALLY done cooking, you dine together in the not so fancy living area, but the both of you don’t care

Jean did his best to clean up and set the sweet, loving tone and that’s all that matters to you.

“I love you (y/n). Thank you for making me so happy.”

Ryusui Nanami:

This man goes all out💀

As soon as you wake up it’s the most perfect breakfast in bed

He has to leave to work but literally leaves you his black card to treat yourself and constantly has people arriving with beautiful flowers every 5 minutes

He comes back for lunch and talks to you

“Has your valentines been well? I’ll make sure that you have the best day ev-“

“I really like all the things Ryusui really i do, but…I just really want to spend time with you…”

He pauses

Then calls in like it’s nothing!

The rest of the day is the two of  you lay in bed together and act all cutesy!

“I’m glad you’re my valentines dear. It’s been one amazing day.”

Spike Spiegel:

This broke man does his best I’ll give him that

He buys you flowers and takes you to a pretty nice restaurant. Nothing too fancy but it’s nicer than you normally go to

He lets you order first and gets him something small, which is weird for this man

You both talk for hours the waitstaff is so annoyed

After you two are FINALLY done you both walk back to the Bebop

“Why did you eat so little Spike? You’re normally chowing down!”

He chuckles and keeps walking, “wasn’t that hungry.”

“Come on spike, we’re practically married, I can tell when you’re lying!”

He sighs and mumbled something 

“What?”

“I wanted to make sure I had enough money for you to eat…”

You stop in your tracks

“Spike…”

You kiss him lovingly 

“Thank you Spike. I love you so much.”

He smiles, “ditto.”

Hisashi Mitsui

You’re probably his first valentines tbh

He waits at a cafe with flowers in his hand

When you show up he’s bright red. You’re not even wearing and saying anything spectacular he’s just so nervous lol

You sit next to each other and talk snack and laugh about everything and anything 

After the cafe you head to the park

And after that you go to little stores you see along the way

Mitsui buys you a stuffed animal you were looking at and you bought him a chain necklace he glanced at

It was a really great valentines, especially since it was first

“T-thanks for being my valentine (y/n). I’m glad i get to spend it with you.”

Matt Holt:

He makes this super cool heart shaped projector thing!

He hands you this heart 

It rises shifts into being a projector that displays all of your favorite memories together

It shows the new inductee dance and how the two of you jumping around without a care in the world

Then it shows a lazy night of the both of you “studying” for an exam as the camera zooms into Matt’s face and your giggles from behind the camera

And one of your favorite memories of all, your day at the beach together. Throwing water at each other, making sand castles, resting you head in his shoulder as the sun goes down 

“Matt…this is beautiful… I-I’m speechless…!”

“It’s alright.” He begins, “I know what you’re gonna say. I love you too.”

Taehoon Seong

Mans has no idea what to do

He acts like he doesn’t care as Hansu tries to give him ideas but really he’s terrified of messing something up

So when the day comes you hear a knock on the door you’re surprised to see a nicely dressed Taehoon with a rose in his hand

“Happy Valentine’s Day idiot.”

You smile and kiss his cheek. “Thank you Tae Tae!”

You Motion for him to come in

When he does there’s a nice breakfast for two in the dining room

“I know you don’t like to go out Tae, so I thought we could stay in for the day.”

Oh my gosh that sounds perfect

“Heh, I guess so. At least I’m with you.”

Damian Wayne:

Spoils you with acts of service 

As soon as you wake up you’re greeted with the smell of a nice breakfast in the dining room 

Then you sit in bed as he feeds you chocolate cover strawberries, watching silly movies and drawing pictures for each other 

At the end of the day he prepares a bath for the both of you

You wash each other not like that weirdos and you even blow some bubbles at him

When it’s finally time to sleep he massages your back and whispers about how much he loves you 

Then of course you fall asleep on his chest as he holds you

“Goodnight beloved. I hope you understand how much I love you.”

Holy - Angel

(Jean x Reader) - Word Count: 2.2k

Creature: a spiritual being believed to act as an attendant, agent, or messenger of God

Warnings: Blasphemy, Very Religious Mindsets, Vaginal Penetration, Creampie, Breeding Kink

Extra Notes: Kicking off the Halloween countdown strong with some angelic Jean! Also, for all of the Fleabag fans, this is lightly inspired by the Confessional scene in season 2!

You were used to the church being quiet at this time of night, it was unusual to see anyone awake at midnight and especially seeing them inside praying. But, this was the only time you liked to come here; you’d show up on Sundays, Wednesdays, and almost every Friday and Monday at midnight.

The large wooden front door of the church creaked as you pushed it open. You leaned your entire body weight into the door, slowly moving it to rest in its normal spot for Wednesdays and Sundays. It’s only completely open all day when there's a service, but just because it’s shut doesn’t mean you can’t come in and pray - that’s something the priest had always told you since your first day here.

Your shoes clicked against the hard mahogany wood flooring underneath you. You walked down the main aisle of the church, passing the pews you normally sit in during sermons. You tended to choose the pews towards the back, not wanting to impose on the other churchgoers - the only person here nice enough to make you feel welcome has always been the priest. Everybody else gave you weird looks for showing up alone when you used to come every week with your husband.

You finally made it to your destination, the large mahogany confessional stood high in front of you. You pulled back the curtain for the left side of the booth and immediately kneeled on the small step stool in front of the small iron grate separating you from the priest. You took a deep breath before bringing all of your sins to mind, readying yourself for the next conversation.

This definitely wasn’t your last time in this exact position and place, and definitely wouldn’t be your last time either. Every week you tried to confess, same day, same time, same priest, same church. You enjoyed routine and you liked to believe maybe Father Jean liked it as well, always knowing you’d make your way here eventually every single Friday night. You took a deep breath before beginning the same routine of the night.

“Bless me Father, for I have sinned.” There fell a moment of silence in which you knew the priest was basking in as well as yourself. “It’s been a week since my last confession.”

You started talking about all of your sins within the last seven days. You spoke of the time you saw your ex-husband at the grocery store the other day, and how you had wished you had the nerve to speak your anger - but you didn’t. You also spoke of the time your mother called and you purposely ignored the ringing because you didn’t feel like talking at the moment - but you did call her back later. And, you spoke a bit too long about the large chocolate cake you bought and ate all by yourself alone in your living room last Saturday night.

After minutes and minutes of confessing every moment within the last seven days where you felt minorly sinful, you ended with an apology. You always ended with many sorrys said to the priest. Sorry for wasting your time, and thank you for being here for me. Sorry for always sinning and thank you for always blessing me despite my sins. Sorry for stealing your sleep on a Friday night, and thank you for always being available when you are available.

Your routine for every Friday night at midnight in this same confessional, with this same priest, in this same church was down to the T. You wouldn’t be surprised if there came a time when you would confess the same sins, constantly, every week. Now, in the routine, all that was left was Father Jean blessing you and you going on your merry way back home.

“That’s all of your sins?” Father Jean asked after a moment of letting your confession truly settle in the air between you both. “You have nothing else left to say to me right now?”

You nodded even though you knew the priest couldn’t see it, “Yes, that’s everything I can think of at the moment.”

“Not even masturbation?”

The question shocked you to your core. You didn’t even like saying the m-word and here was your priest saying it to you, asking you if you have participated in the act. You wondered why he’d even ask such a thing, did he believe you were lying about your sins?

“No, no no no, of course not, Father.” You felt like crying, pleading with the priest to know that you would never leave a sin out of your confession and you would never lie to him. “I have never done that, never.”

“Wow,” Father Jean spoke as if he gave up completely, “You’ve never even masturbated, you really are a saint, you know that, right?”

“I,” You attempted to speak, but only air came out of your mouth. You thought maybe it was a good sign you were breathing, at least now you knew this whole conversation was real. “I, uh, I think it’s a little sacreligious for you to compare me to a saint when I’m not.”

Father Jean giggled breathily on his side of the confessional. You heard him smack his hand against his leg, as if he were physically giving up on this conversation. You felt guilty for making him feel this way, you now wished you had masturbated at least once so you could help him through this conversation - maybe he wouldn’t be so upset if you had done something that sinful in your life just once.

But, you never had. You only had sex with your husband a handful of times before he divorced you a year into the marriage. And, even then, you had been persistent on waiting to have sex for the first time until after your wedding day. Before then as well, you always swallowed the urge to touch yourself, never wanting to give into sin.

“I’m sorry,” You pleaded to the priest, “I can- I can touch myself if you want me to!”

“No, no no no.” The wood creaked on the other side of the wall in front of you, it sounded like Father Jean was walking around on his side of the confessional. “I don’t want you to do that, I just- I have never met somebody like you before, you know that?” The curtain on his side sprung open quickly, you looked toward your curtain, wondering where he was going. Outside of your curtain, you heard him speak. “You’re special, you deserve a special reward.”

You blinked at him, dumbfounded, “Father, what do you mean, what are you saying?”

The curtain in between you and the priest slammed against the wall beside it and you stared up at Father Jean. You were still on your knees in front of him, looking up at him with large and delicate eyes. He could see your innocence in your face, he could see how sinless you lived and yet how guilty you felt for every normal feeling you had. It was amazing to him to see someone so much like himself.

“I’ve been looking for somebody like you for quite a long portion of my existence.” Father Jean shook his head as he examined you in front of him. “And, I have never met anyone as holy as you are. I want to reward you, God is allowing me to reward you, if you accept his reward.”

You nodded quickly, “Yes, of course I accept. I accept anything God will give me.”

“Then, stand up for me.” You did as he said, and stood on your feet. You had to look up at Father Jean at this distance, you had never been this close to him. You always knew he was tall, and you had always heard the other members speak of his height, but you had never had the chance to witness it yourself so closely. “And, kiss me.”

Your throat had gone dry, you had to admit you had found yourself imagining kissing Father Jean many, many times - he’s the most handsome man you had ever seen. But, you never thought it become a reality, you knew priests couldn’t marry, so you assumed sex was not an option for them. Hearing your priest tell you to kiss him made you want to question his celibacy, but you also didn’t care so much, he didn’t have to tell you twice - you have wanted to kiss him for as long as you’ve known him.

You leaned forward and kissed him, swiftly landing your lips on his lips. You had never kissed anyone other than your ex-husband, and you had to admit that kissing somebody else was a whole new experience for you. And, you had to admit you liked it, you liked it a lot - and part of you even missed these intimate moments with your ex.

Your body was suddenly flush against Father Jean’s, and you weren’t sure if this was your doing or his. His body was not only pressed against your own, but now he was backing you up, back into the confessional. You moved your lips from his mouth to give yourself just enough space to talk.

“Father,” You whispered against his lips, “Where are you-?”

The priest sushed you quietly, “It’s okay, just trust me, okay?” You nodded while your lips still grasped for his, not wanting to stop kissing him but still curious in his plan. But, you did trust him, you trusted him with every ounce of your soul.

Father Jean backed you against the mahogany wall and you picked you up so your legs could wrap around his waist. You gasped as he pushed your back against the wall enough to only need to hold you up with one hand. He used his now free hand to unbutton his black slacks.

The new angle you were at forced your dress to be pushed up to your waist, and now his free hand scrambled for your panties. You tried to speak, but all that came out was a mess of breathing and syllables.

“Fa-fa-fath-er” You spoke through breathless gasps.

The priest shook his head, “Don’t worry, God has a plan for you and this baby, he’s going to be very special.” Father Jean moved your panties to the side, pushing his dick inside of you in one swift movement. You would’ve been more impressed by his pure muscular strength if you weren’t preoccupied by his whole cock inside of you.

The feeling of being with Father Jean felt so much better than being with your ex-husband, it felt holy oddly enough. You felt like you were floating rather being held up by the priest’s muscular arms, and you could swear - in your lightheaded state of pleasure - that there was an odd golden glow around the both of you. The golden glow made you think that maybe God himself was here to witness this moment, and that thought made your eyes flood with tears. You always knew God was real and active in your life, but this was the first moment you felt reassured by that feeling.

Tears streamed down your cheeks as gripped onto the back of the priest’s shirt. You could feel that Father Jean had some odd bumps on his shoulder bones, they felt like long linear scars meeting at a point at his ribs. You were curious about what these marks were caused by, but not enough to open your mouth and attempt speaking - and you were sure if you had opened your mouth, nothing but moans would come out.

You suddenly felt as Father Jean’s abdomen tightened against your stomach, and even though you had only had sex a handful of times, you knew what that meant. You leaned in close to the priest, bringing your mouth up to his ear and whispered sweetly to him.

“Come inside of me,” You begged, “Please, Father.”

You didn’t have to say much more than that before Father Jean was releasing himself inside of you. You and the priest sang a chorus of moans as you felt yourself get filled up with his warmth. You wanted Father Jean to fuck you again and again and again, knowing that eventually you’ll be filled up with as many children as he wants for however long he wants you.

The priest set you back on the ground gently and your legs wobbled as they hit the ground. You felt like a newborn deer just learning to walk for the first time and you looked at it as well when you tried to leave the confessional without the priest’s assistance. Father Jean helped you to a pew and sat down beside you, placing his hand gently on your arm before speaking softly to you.

“I’m glad you have accepted God’s gift,” Father Jean said, “He will be pleased to know one of his children is walking the Earth, continuing his legacy for him.”

You nodded, confused but not in the mood to ask questions. You’d ask him some other time, you’d ask him about God’s gift to you, what he means, why he’s doing this, and when you can do it again. You also wished to ask the priest what those marks on his back were from, but just as suddenly as Father Jean had pinned you against the wall, you felt the spirit of sleep dawn upon you. You rested your head on the priest’s shoulder and whispered to him.

“Okay,” You said in a small voice, one you were unsure if the priest could even hear, “Thank you.” Jean chuckled as you began drifting off into sleep.

The Lidérc

(Jean x Reader) - Word Count: 3.7k

Creature: a creature that can assume a human shape, usually the shape of a much lamented dead relative or lover in order to have sex with its victims.

Warnings: Major Character Death, Grieving, Dry Humping, Descriptions of Injuries

Quick Summary: while reminiscing about your husband, you have a strange dream that deeply upsets you.

Extra Notes: Happy Thursday! 3 more days until Halloween!

You weren’t shocked to see dust had collected on the bed sheets. It’s been a year since the accident, and it’s been a year since you’ve even stepped foot into this room. That morning you hadn’t felt like making the bed like you normally did, so you left it as is thus the dust collecting on top of the unmade bed.

You felt awkward being in here, even if it had only been a few minutes. You hadn’t so much as walked past the vanity on the wall opposite the bed, but you still felt as if you were intruding. This wasn’t entirely your room anymore, even if it did still belong to you. This was Jean’s room, and the person you were when he was still alive.

You took one final deep breath, turned around and closed the door behind you when you left the room. Maybe one day you can go back in there and sort through Jean’s clothing, it wasn’t like he would miss them. But today wasn’t the day, and tomorrow probably wouldn’t be the day either - it’s already been a full year since he left, so maybe in another year the day will finally arise.

Thinking about Jean always made your stomach hurt, even before he passed. You couldn’t help but remember that awful pain of bundled up nerves in the bottom of your stomach the first time he talked to you in that café. When he walked up to where you were sitting alone, and asked what you were working on, on your open laptop sitting in front of you.

You weren’t expecting the boy to even come up to you, nevermind talk to you. He had been staring at you from across the café for nearly an hour, and you kept catching him almost stepping in your direction but instead quickly sidestepping to go the other way. You wanted him to come up to you, but that was a lot to ask for especially since he was on the clock, was two years older than you, and-

You laughed weakly to yourself, “Another year and I’ve got you beat, Jeany.” You knew he couldn’t hear you, but you still liked to imagine he was listening. “You always loved reminding me how old you were, you always told me to respect your elders.” You laughed at Jean’s favorite words, but your laugh ran dry the more you thought about the fact that you’d never be able to hear him say it again.

It was like being told about climate change, and the very upsetting future our world was headed towards - being reminded of the hard truth hurt more than that bad thing actually happening. After a year of pain you realize that it’s not the days that you wake up remembering he’s not here anymore that hurt the most, it’s the days that you think he’s waiting for you in the kitchen downstairs with a cup of coffee just the way you like it. He always woke up before you, and he always made breakfast for you when he did, so of course you’d think he was waiting for you to finally join him in the kitchen. But, when you finally go into the kitchen, there is no breakfast and no Jean.

The stairs creaked underneath your body on your way downstairs. You went into the living room to the couch that you set up as your new bed a year ago. The living room didn’t even look like a living room anymore, but a second bedroom for you. On the coffee table and armchair sat piles of folded clothing around the couch with a stuffed animal - that Sasha had sent in the mail after she received the news of Jean’s passing - and a large blanket you bought to replace the dusty one from upstairs.

You sat down on your bed, and used the remote to turn on the tv for yourself. You started falling asleep to the light and sounds coming from the tv in front of the couch a year ago. Before Jean passed, he used to talk you to sleep; he’d tell you about his day, random memories, or anything he could think of, and when he was there to protect you, you never felt like you needed light to fall asleep when you had his arms instead. But, he was gone and that comfort he gave you was gone with him.

You laid down underneath the covers in the light that the tv provided, staring blankly at the cartoons bouncing across the screen. You knew if Jean was here, he’d say something about how Connie would love this show just because it was bright and made no sense to people with common sense. You knew you’d laugh, and push him, and remind him to be nicer to his friends. It would be a nice moment if Jean were here, but he wasn’t so the moment instead passed as yet another neutral one.

Your eyes eventually grew heavy, and your blinks grew slower. You could hardly keep your eyes open, and you didn’t really mind closing them, it wasn’t like you were missing anything important if you fell asleep right now. So, you allowed yourself to finally drift asleep.

You were suddenly in a car, driving down the street of your house. No music was playing from your radio, which is strange, but you were humming something soft to yourself. You pulled your car into your driveway, and put it in park before locking it and going inside your house.

You just came home from work which was obvious from your semi-formal outfit choice of the day. You took your high heels off and set it beside the door after entering your home. You locked the door behind you from force of habit and walked slowly down the hallway leading to the kitchen. You walked past framed pictures of family, friends, and most importantly, Jean.

You didn’t even glance at the picture of Jean that was sitting beside the lightswitch for the kitchen. It was your favorite picture of him, one you took on your first date with him. He had been focusing on opening the bottle of wine too much to notice his elbow deep into his spaghetti. He hated the picture, but always enjoyed the laughter that arose from you when you saw it, so he let you hang it up on the wall after you gifted him the picture in a frame for Christmas.

But, you didn’t even want to bother with pictures, when the real thing was standing right in front of you.

Jean leaned over the kitchen sink, scrubbing vigorously at the dishes with bright yellow rubber gloves on. You watched him from the entrance to the kitchen as he cursed at the bowl in his hands, covered in soap suds. There must’ve been a nasty stain on the dish because Jean was only a few seconds from throwing the whole dish away.

You giggled, blowing your cover. Jean hadn’t heard you enter the house, too focused on the dirty dishes. But, after hearing your sweet laugh from behind him, Jean finally turned around to you, slightly surprised by your seemingly sudden presence.

“Hi,” Jean said with a smile, “How was work?”

So, you did just come home from work.

“It was the same as always.” You walked across the kitchen towards him. “Same people, same problems, same cafeteria coffee.”

Jean set the dish back into the suds, “You make it sound so bad. Sometimes having a routine is nice.” Jean took his rubber gloves off and set them on the counter beside the sink. “Now, when the routine is taken away - that’s when things get bad-” Jean turned to you with raised eyebrows- “Right?”

You blinked at your husband, “Yeah, I guess. Anyways, what are you making for dinner?”

“Dinner?” Jean held his hand to his heart. “Why are you asking me about dinner, I’m the one doing the dishes, dinner is your problem.”

“What?” You laughed with emotionless shock, trying to keep the fake fight going. “We never agreed upon that deal!”

Jean laughed with you, “This is a tyranny, you don’t have the opportunity to disagree with anything. I decide everything.”

“So, you can make dinner, then? Since it’s your tyranny, right?”

“Touché.”

The kitchen grew quiet as the conversation quickly died. You didn’t really feel the need to talk at the moment. You kept watching Jean as a strange feeling settled in your stomach. You couldn’t help but feel like even though Jean was so close to you, just across the room from you, you still felt like he was a whole lifetime away.

You watched intently as Jean went about his day so normally. He had discarded his rubber dish scrubbing gloves, and had now moved onto looking through paper menus for what to buy at some local restaurants. He furrowed his eyebrows as he read over the menu items, probably trying to decide on what to get himself as well as for you.

“Honey,” You said in a soft voice as you walked across the room towards him, “Why are you looking at menus?” You smiled wide, trying to hide the laugh bubbling up from your stomach. “I was assuming you were going to make dinner. Like, a romantic candle lit dinner, like we used to have when you still liked me.”

“Babe.” Jean smiled, but you could tell he was trying to keep a straight face. “That’s impossible, because I never liked you.”

“Jean!” You smacked your husband’s chest with a hard thud.

“I’m kidding,” Jean shouted with a laugh, “And, I’m not cooking anything tonight, unless you want me to, of course - but, we already agreed on ordering something so-”

“We did?” You stared at Jean with heavily furrowed eyebrows. You must’ve forgotten the last ten minutes of conversation with him because you couldn’t remember ever agreeing upon anything like that.

Jean tilted his head at you with a grin across his lips, “Yeah? Don’t you remember, it happened just a minute ago? Maybe you’re losing it, hun.” Jean gave your forehead a flick before turning back to the paper menu in his hand.

Maybe you were losing it. Why couldn’t you remember that conversation at all? And, he said it happened only a minute ago? But, that doesn’t make any sense, you had been quietly admiring him for so long. There was no way you agreed upon anything during that time, but maybe Jean asked the question about ordering in tonight and took your wide eyed silence as a yes. But, that just wasn’t like Jean to assume something from silence, the whole thing was just strange.

“Okay,” You spoke slowly, afraid of missing another minute of conversation, “Well, then it’s settled that we’re eating in tonight.”

Jean looked at you from over the menu, “How hungry are you right now?”

“A normal amount, wait-” You pressed your hand to your stomach and didn’t feel the rumble of hunger deep inside- “Yeah, a normal amount, why?”

Jean grinned, “How about we both eat in and eat out tonight?” Jean raised a single eyebrow with his question. You were sure he was making an innuendo of some sort, but you couldn’t think of what. All you could hear yourself thinking was, won’t we be too full?

“Um,” You said hesitantly, “I guess we can do that.”

“You don’t know what I’m saying, do you?”

The joke suddenly hit you, “Oh my god, Jean!”

“Come on.” Jean laughed as he threw the menu aside. “Time to eat up.”

With newly free hands, Jean now attempted his next trick. He bent forward, wrapping his arms around your waist, and slung you onto his shoulder. You were now face to back with Jean, and you gently slapped your hands against his ass, in an attempt to persuade him to drop you, as he walked you around the house.

You watched the floor for any indication of where Jean was taking you. The floor faded from tiles into hardwood and then into carpeted stairs as your body bounced against his shoulder with each step. You gripped hard to Jean’s waist, trying to suppress the fear that was bubbling up inside of you from seeing the stairs from this angle.

Jean laughed as he finally reached the top of the stairs, “Baby, seriously, you’re fine with me - I’m not dropping you, I won’t let you go.”

“You better not.” Your grip loosened on Jean’s waist as you realized how deeply your trust for him ran. He wouldn’t drop you, you really are fine with him.

The floor in front of you turned back to hardwood which indicated you were finally upstairs. No more bouncing on his shoulder or fear of falling face first into the stairs he was walking up under you. Jean then opened a door, and the floor switched from the hardwood to carpet. You could admit that from the beginning, you knew where Jean was taking you, but now you knew where you were - you were in the bedroom.

In one swing of his arms, as if you were a bag of potatoes and not a human being, Jean tossed you onto the bed in front of him. Your back hit the soft bed, and you laughed as you looked up at him standing over you. Jean looked down at you as well, his eyes were wide with admiration, and you swore you could even see the glimmer of tears daring to fall from his eyelids.

Jean joined you on the bed, crawling over top of you. As he took his time getting to your lips, he made sure to stop at different parts of your body and give attention to them on his way to your face. He kissed your clothed thigh, your hip, your stomach, the cup of your breasts, and finally your face. He smiled down at you before he finally got to kiss your lips.

“Hello,” Jean said in a sweet tone as if it had been too long since he last saw you.

You smiled back at Jean, “Hello.”

Jean finally let his lips meet yours, he gave an extra gentle kiss to your lips. You weren’t sure if it was the feeling of him being so far away earlier or maybe the moments you had missed in the kitchen, but you didn’t want to be innocent with him. You felt passionate right now, and you wanted Jean to feel that passion from both your lips and your body.

You took control over your moment with Jean. You wrapped your arms around his neck, and brought his body closer to yours. You kissed him roughly, introducing your tongue to his mouth with a sensual slowness. You could even hear Jean groan against your mouth with the movement - you couldn’t say you were surprised by his reaction, you knew how much he loved being reminded of what your tongue could do.

Your lips awakened something in Jean’s attitude, no longer attempting to be sweet and innocent, Jean was now just as desperate as you were. Your lips struggled to stay with each other as you kissed wherever on his face your mouth could find. You kissed over his lips, his cheeks, his chin, and even scratched the soft skin of your lips as you ended up kissing his rough stubble.

“Jean,” You moaned his name into his mouth, “I want more.”

Jean could melt from just those words and the way you said it. But, when you reached for the waistband of your slacks, fumbling clumsily for the zipper, Jean felt his entire body get hot with desire for you. You finally loosened your pants, letting the fabric fall open for Jean to whatever he pleased with.

“Not yet,” Jean whispered breathlessly into your mouth, “Let’s take our time, please.”

It wasn’t like Jean to want to take anything slow, so this moment must be really important to him. Hell, he didn’t even want to take his time after he met you. He asked you out on a date for the very next night, and even wanted to make it official after the first kiss. He even proposed to you only a year into the relationship, and far sooner than anybody else in your life. Jean took life by storm every single day, so for him to want to take this moment slow with you made your stomach flutter with butterflies.

You nodded against Jean’s face, “Okay, we can go slower.” You kissed Jean gently down his neck and then pressed your mouth to his ear. “Here, let me take control.”

Jean let you take control in the situation, flipping him onto his back and situating yourself on top of him. You looked down at the boy below you, looking at how pretty he looked with his reddened face, wild looking hazel eyes, and messy long brown hair splayed out on the pillow beneath his head.

In a moment of haziness, you almost thought the bed had been a mess; both unmade and covered in a thick layer of dust from months of being unused. But, after a quick check of your surroundings, both the bedroom and the bed itself looked completely normal. No dust, no umade sheets, and no missing clothing. This room was just as you remembered it, perfectly normal.

“What’s wrong?” Jean moved his hands down your sides and slid his hands into the waist of your pants to touch your bare hips. “You look worried about something.”

You shook your head slightly, “It’s nothing.”

You leaned down to kiss Jean again, trying to help him ignore your unnatural behavior. It was as if your mind was playing tricks on itself, and it was kind of scaring you. You’d never actually tell Jean that because you’re afraid of how he’d react, but you couldn’t help the uneasiness that came with your sudden forgetting problem.

As your lips moved with Jean’s lips, you felt his fingers dig into the skin on your hips. You felt as Jean’s rough touch slowly turned from a way to grip himself to Earth, and more a way to grind his hips into you from below. He moved your body against his body with a slow proficiency, even moaning into your mouth with each grind of your body on top of his.

You laughed breathlessly into Jean’s mouth, “I thought you wanted to take things slow?”

“I did.” Jean chuckled lowly to you. “But, now I don’t think I can handle going slow anymore.”

You took Jean’s words as a bit of a challenge, if he didn’t want it slow, then you were going to make him want it again. You rolled your hips delicately against his body, ignoring and going against the direction of his rough guiding hands. If he didn’t want to take it slow anymore, then you were going to prove to him that he shouldn’t have changed his mind.

Jean groaned low in his throat from feeling your body hit spots of him that he couldn’t reach when he was in control. Jean didn’t stop trying to change your movements, but now out of desperation. You felt as he desperately clung to your hips for dear life. He wasn’t used to being on the bottom, and it was driving him crazy in all of the right ways.

“Baby,” Jean mumbled against your mouth, “Baby, look at me, please look at me - I need to see you.”

You leaned back and looked at Jean, and immediately regretted it. Jean didn’t look how he did in the kitchen, he didn’t look like himself at all. Of course, under all of the blood you could recognize the face as the one you’ve loved for so long, but upon first glance, he was just a bloody body.

Jean’s entire right side of his face was where the blood was mostly coming from. There were glass shards lodged into his cheek and forehead, and blood splattered across the left side of his face from the cuts. Jean’s head wasn’t up straight either, where he normally had excellent posture and a long lean neck, he now had it stuck at an uncomfortably impossible angle. And, blood spewed from Jean’s mouth, dripping from his lips as he spoke to you.

“Baby,” Jean said in his normally sweet tone, “I love you, always remember that, okay?”

Your eyes were filled with tears as you stared at him, “Jean what the-”

“Just,” Jean continued despite his gruesome state, “I’m okay, and you should be too.”

Your eyes snapped open suddenly. Your heart was racing in your chest. You could hardly breathe as you looked around the area around you. The tv was still playing cartoons innocently in front of you, and you were still comfortably tucked into your blanket on the living room couch. Nothing seemed off, and nothing seemed out of place - and unfortunately, there was no Jean in this reality.

You took deep breaths to calm your still quickly beating heart. You didn’t know why you would dream of something so awful, yet something you were so sickeningly envious of. You didn’t care what Jean looked like or if he was permanently bleeding from never healing wounds, you would prefer he be here than somewhere you couldn’t reach him. Even if your dream self was suffering horribly from such a nightmare scenario, she was so lucky because at least she still had Jean.

You know dreams have meanings, even the scary ones that settle new fears in your heart. You wondered what that dream could mean, and you weren’t completely sure. But, you supposed maybe it was trying to convince you to move on - well, maybe not on but moving back into the bedroom would be a nice start.

And maybe Jean really did come to you in that dream, maybe he came back to help you move on. It would explain how scarily accurate he looked, both in his very much alive state and in his less alive state. It would also explain how warm the dream made you feel, from the tender moment with Jean in the kitchen to just coming home from a job you haven’t been to in six months. And, most importantly, it would explain why you could still feel Jean’s hands on your skin, like each touch he gave you was actually an invisible tattoo on your body.

The Worst Wingman - Tiger’s Eye and Gold

(Chapter 2 / 3)

Jean x Reader

Word Count: 5.6k

Previous Chapter

Warnings: Mentions of vomiting, Implied sex

Summary: Jean sucks at picking blind dates for you, but at least he’s trying. After one final attempt at finding love at the hands of Jean, he goes on a double date with you and the newest boy he’s thrown onto you. The boy is everything you never knew you needed, and Jean has to push down his growing feelings at the idea of you being happy without him.

Notes: I am not shitting on polpette di cavallo or the consumption of horse meat in general, I understand that it is a popular Italian dish and I was only mocking my ignorance towards the subject! (Plus, I thought it’d be funny to make a horse joke in a Jean x Reader)

Second Saturday

The night air wasn’t chilly, but you stayed by Jean’s side nonetheless. You pressed against his arm, using his body heat to keep yourself warm. And, Jean didn’t mind the close company - he actually liked it when you got close to him, it was the same reason he cuddled with you so often.

You and Jean stood outside of an unfamiliar restaurant, waiting for the last two people of the party to show up and to inform the hostess of their reservation. You normally hated double dates because the other couple always seemed to have more fun than you. But, you felt safe by Jean’s side, you knew he’d go as far as blatantly ignoring his date if it meant he got to have one conversation with you. Maybe that was selfish to think, but you didn’t mind, you’d probably never use him anyways - only keeping him as plan B in a worst case scenario.

But, you surprisingly had faith. Maybe - just maybe - this date will be your last one in a very long time. Maybe you would fall in love with this football player. Maybe you’d marry him and eventually start a family. Maybe you’d make sure to visit this same restaurant every anniversary - a physical monument of where your love had sprouted.

And then, as the years ticked by in your relationship, maybe you’d find yourselves growing sick of each other. Maybe you’d come home early from work and find him fucking his secretary over his desk in his home office. Maybe you’d stay with him, but only for the kids. Maybe - just maybe - you’d be able to ignore the whole affair just to pretend you love him for a few more years until your eventual death.

Oh God, love was exhausting - even to think about. And, it always seemed to end in pain, no matter how in love the couple seemed to be once upon a time.

It was hard to ignore the facts, and the inevitable ending to all things good. It was hard to ignore the over 50% of people who got divorced each year. And, it was hard to pretend you were more deserving of a lifelong fantastic marriage full of love and laughter just because-

“What are you thinking about?” Jean asked with a giggle.

You looked up at the boy, your eyebrows furrowed, “Huh?”

Jean smiled wide, “You look like you’re going to be sick.” He looked around quickly, taking in the sight of the other couples also waiting for a table inside. “Do you want to leave? We can go back to mine and forget this entire night was supposed to happen.”

“No,” You said quickly, “I want to meet him. You went through so much work to convince him to go on this date, why would I throw that away so easily?”

“Not really.” Jean frowned lightly as he looked past you, clearly reliving memories in his head, “I didn’t really do anything, actually.”

It was true, all Jean had to do was show the football player a picture of you and he was in. Jean had started the conversation by asking the football player’s schedule for the next weekend and if he was free for a date that Saturday. At first, the boy continuously refused any date, saying he needed the day to practice before the next game, but Jean showed the boy a picture instead of arguing with his words.

The football player fell completely silent, staring at Jean’s phone with widened eyes. It was hard to say no to a date with you - to put it simply, you were a goddess. The football player continued to stare at the picture of you, taken last Halloween when you and Jean had dressed as a witch and her black cat familiar; you being the witch and Jean being your cat. It was Jean’s favorite picture of you because you showed your candid smile as you laughed at one of Jean’s jokes, instead of your fake smile you saved for pictures.

The football player quickly agreed to the date after seeing the picture. He gave Jean his number, urging Jean to text him the time and place. He’d be there, the football player promised, he wouldn’t miss it for the world.

“Sure,” You said sarcastically, “I’m sure you had to promise him a month’s supply of-” You took a moment to remember what football players liked other than football- “Steroids.”

“Seriously?” Jean asked with a laugh, “Keep the steroids jokes to a minimum when he shows up, okay?” Jean furrowed his eyebrows. “Actually, don’t mention steroids at all when he gets here.”

You sighed, “If it’s any consolation, I was going to say protein powder.” You turned to Jean, slightly tilting your head. “Can I make protein powder jokes when he’s here?”

Jean frowned at you, “I guess-”

“And,” You added with a grin, “Can I make shoulder pad jokes?”

“I suppose-”

“And, can I make football field jokes? Or, is that too much as well?”

“Okay,” Jean said as he threw an arm around your shoulders, “I see what you’re doing.” Jean shoved your face into his chest which had always been his favorite way to shut you up. You inhaled the familiar scent of his clothes, and the unfamiliar scent of a new cologne he wore specifically for this date. “You’re such a smart ass.”

You pushed your head out from between his chest and arm, “You’re ruining my hair, you bastard!”

Jean laughed as he pulled you closer to him, “It still looks great, don’t worry about it.”

“Hey, Jean,” A new voice said from only a few feet away, “And-”

Jean pushed you from his body, allowing you to extend a single hand in the blonde boy’s direction, “Hi, it’s lovely to meet you.” You told the boy your name before he finally introduced himself.

The boy shook your hand with a strong grasp, “I’m Reiner-”

“And, I’m Pieck,” A black haired girl said as she poked her head out from behind Reiner’s broad back. The girl stood in front of Jean and smiled up at him, “And, I suppose you’re my date. Unless she is-” Pieck glanced at you- “Which I’m more than okay with as well.”

“No,” Jean said quickly, “I am.”

“Awesome,” Pieck said with a smile, “Is there a table being readied for us inside or-”

“I have a reservation,” Reiner said, “The table should’ve been readied about ten minutes ago, when we were supposed to be here - Pieck - if you didn’t take an hour just to pick a dress.”

Pieck smiled wide though her words were drenched in venom, “I thought you said you’d stop mentioning that once we got here, Reiner.” Pieck turned to her friend with a tilt of her head. “Am I correct?”

Reiner’s face dropped as well as his stomach, “Of course, I’m sorry, Pieck.”

“So,” Jean said to fill the new silence that had settled, “You all think we should head inside now?”

“Yes!” Pieck said as she ran to Jean’s side, sliding her arm around his and pulling him off towards the front doors of the restaurant. You couldn’t help but pout at their backs as they walked off, noticing how close they immediately got with each other and even the new smile plastered across Jean’s face.

“And,” A gentle voice said suddenly from your left, “‘You ready to head inside as well?”

You looked at the boy by your side and took in the sight of his arm thrusted in your direction. His arm was thick, as much as a football player’s arm is supposed to be. And - if you looked close enough - you could see where his muscle was bulging beneath the fabric of his button down shirt and where the veins of his arms were protruding from within his skin.

You walked inside the restaurant by Reiner’s side, intertwining your arm with his. He talked briefly with the hostess at the entrance, and then walked with you as the group was led to a large table in the back. The table was sensually dimmed and if you were here with only one person, you were sure you would end the night in their arms - the atmosphere was enough to cause your heart rate to accelerate and butterflies to flutter around in your stomach.

You took the seat across from your date, and Pieck quickly took the seat to your right. The night started slowly, a light stream of conversation amongst the four of you. You talked about the general information of each person; their college major, their hobbies, their living situations, their weekend plans, and anything else someone could think of in the heat of the moment.

The night was going swimmingly, you ordered the white wine and a dish going by the name of polpette di cavallo which you hadn’t given much thought to before ordering. It was a smaller dish than what you were originally expecting, a white porcelain plate with a mysterious brown substance surrounding three meatballs.

You pushed your fork and knife through the slightly charred meat, cutting the balls into consumable pieces. You continued to talk with the group and - more specifically - Reiner. You found out more about the boy you were on the date with, from his personal life to his football career to his plans after college.

He was sweet, he was funny, and he always gave you time to speak - continuously asking you questions about yourself.

But, unfortunately for him, you couldn’t take your eyes off of Jean. He talked with Pieck to your right, and you couldn’t help but listen to every word exchanged between the two. Even going as far as cutting into their conversation a few times and answering a question clearly directed at Jean.

“And then,” You said in response to Pieck’s question, “Jean went back to the party to pick Connie up because he finally realized he left him behind!”

Pieck giggled loudly, “That’s amazing!” She completely turned in her seat, now facing you instead of her date. “Then, what happened?”

You leaned closer to the girl, “Then, he called and begged me to meet him at the party.” You grinned wider. “Because, he didn’t want to leave again after going back.”

Pieck quickly turned back to Jean, “Why didn’t you want to leave? Even after Sasha threw that drink in your face?” Pieck then looked back at you. “And, why did he call you to come to the party as well?”

You furrowed your eyebrows at Pieck, “I’m actually not sure-”

Jean shrugged lightly, “I just- I wanted another beer and I needed somebody to drive me home afterwards.”

You turned your gaze to Jean, your eyes lit  with a new fury. That was why he called you that night? For a damn ride, not even for your company? It was always strange to you how Jean could be so casually cruel. He’d speak before thinking and end up breaking a piece of your heart without  noticing - and he did it frequently.

“Seriously,” The word was drenched in hurt as you shouted it across the table at Jean, “That’s seriously all you called me for? You just wanted a ride, Kirstein?”

Jean scratched the back of his neck, “I know you don’t really like drinking so I wasn’t worried about you getting drunk-”

“What do you mean I don’t like drinking?” You thrusted your hand towards your half-full glass of white wine. “I drink all of the time, I’m a real maniac.”

Jean smiled, “Oh, you’re crazy-” Jean leaned on the table, coming closer to you- “I mean, you really are a maniac -  How can you possibly slowly sip white wine at an Italian restaurant?”

And, as quickly as Jean could upset you and break your heart, he could just as quickly mend your broken parts.

You bit your lip to hide your new smile, “I can go crazy-” You leaned towards Jean as well- “Sometimes, I sip from your beers and then I immediately regret it because it’s gross.”

“Oh,” Jean giggled with the word, “You’re wild.”

It was like time had stopped completely - which seemed to happen a lot when around Jean. You were sure it was because he was too beautiful not to stare at, and Father Time helped you by stopping everything altogether. Or, you thought the effect of time stopping was purely psychological considering how deeply you knew the boy. But, whatever the reason, time stopped nonetheless.

You sat motionless, only looking into Jean’s eyes - a color reminding you of a tiger's eye crystal. And - like a tiger’s eye crystal - Jean seemed to radiate confidence and strength, and gave you an unknown balance to your own being. Jean was your second half, a part of you that you hadn’t known was missing. He was like the second half of an undone puzzle or-

“How’s your-” Reiner said, suddenly breaking the moment between you and Jean- “Your- uh, po- polpette-”

“Polpette di cavallo,” Pieck finished Reiner’s sentence for him.

Reiner nodded briskly, “That.” He smiled wide at you. “How is that?”

“It’s good,” You said as you scanned the plate in front of you, “It’s very thick, I think they used a different part of the cow than what I’m used to.” You glanced at the three faces watching you intently. “Maybe the stomach? I don’t know what part they use for hamburgers, I don’t really like thinking about it.”

Pieck giggled and pushed your shoulder lightly, “You’re kidding, right?”

You widened your eyes at the girl, “Oh, is it not the stomach?” You cleared your throat. “Then, the- the thighs?”

“No, silly,” Pieck said with a smile, “That’s not beef-” Pieck thrusted at the meat still sitting on the plate in front of you- “That’s chavelin.”

You gave Pieck a blank face, “Chave- what?”

“Chavelin.” Pieck tilted her head at you. “You know, horse meat?”

Suddenly, the chavelin was making another entrance, just this time coming back up. You smashed a hand over your mouth as the horse meat mingled with your stomach acid, begging to be back on the plate in front of you. You made quick eyes around the table; first at Pieck who was rubbing your shoulder soothingly and asking what was wrong, then to Reiner who was leaning across the table with wide eyes, and then to Jean who was already standing, gesturing you towards the bathroom.

Jean, sweet Jean, you felt strangely guilty for consuming the meat but - oddly enough - he didn’t seem to mind. At least, he didn’t look like he minded as you ran off towards the bathroom, your high heels clicking quickly against the fancy tiles of the Italian restaurant.

You swung the bathroom door open, ignoring the cringeworthy smash that erupted through the room once the door hit the wall behind it. There were other women in the bathroom, but you ignored them as you made your way to the first open stall you could find. The women watched curiously as you fell to your knees in front of the toilet, threatening to throw up the food you had so mindlessly eaten for the last hour and a half.

Nothing came out though, only a few breathless burps into the toilet bowl. You sat there for a few minutes longer than you needed to, sitting against the marble-tiled wall beside the toilet. You pressed your face against the tiles lightly, letting the coolness calm down your sweating skin.

“This is the women’s restroom,” A woman’s voice said from beside the sink.

“I’m sorry,” A familiar voice said back, “I’m just here checking up on somebody. She got sick, I’m here to-”

You lightly pushed the bathroom stall open, leaning against the edge of the door. You smiled weakly at Jean, standing with two middle-aged women who you remembered briefly from when you ran in here. He seemed to be aggressively convincing them of his honesty, swinging his arms around ferociously with his words. And upon seeing you standing in the doorway, the women finally believed him and didn’t try stopping him any further.

“Hi,” You said delicately from across the few feet separating you and Jean, “This is the women’s restroom, what are you doing in here?”

Jean bit back his smile, “I thought you might want some company.” Jean crossed the steps between you, now only a few inches away. “Nobody deserves to puke alone.”

You lightly pushed Jean’s shoulder with a giggle, “You’re ridiculous, but thank you-” You turned around and opened your arms to the inside of the empty bathroom stall- “And, welcome to my humble abode.”

“Oh,” Jean said with a smile, “I like what you did with the place.”

You grinned, “Thank you, I just got done with renovations, so I appreciate that.”

“And,” Jean quickly added as he pointed towards the lone sink in the corner, “The kitchen area looks very nice.”

You shrugged, “I tried to go for something a bit more modern and minimalistic.”

Jean breathlessly giggled by your side, “Well, you succeeded.”

Jean let you take the first seat, watching as you found your spot beside the toilet with the side of your face against the tiled wall. Jean then joined you on the floor, sitting by your side and pressing the side of his face against the tiled wall, but only so he could make eye contact with you.

The bathroom got silent a minute after Jean joined you in the stall. You supposed the other women were either staying quiet in order to eavesdrop or left to return to their dinners. Either way - you didn’t care if the women were there or not - you were going to talk to Jean freely in your secret space.

You weren’t sure why the bathroom now felt sacred to you. It wasn’t at the end of the Labyrinth for only the worthy to find. Instead, it was a bathroom in an Italian restaurant with a purely Italian menu that you should have used Google Translate for. But, it felt like you and Jean’s secret space, a place where you two could always find each other and could spend the rest of eternity together. Nothing bad happened within these stall walls, and nobody was eating horse meat for the past hour and a half within these stall walls.

“Do you remember when we first met?” Jean suddenly asked in an attempt to fill the comfortable silence in the bathroom.

You nodded lightly, “Yeah, of course I do.”

You had met Jean at a house party freshman year of college. You were invited since your roommate at the time was sleeping with the home-owner which happened to be one of Jean’s closest friends. And - ironically - you met Jean on the bathroom floor in that house at that fateful party nearly two years ago. It was strange how things went full circle.

Jean leaned his shoulder into your own, “Do you remember why we even started talking that night?”

You grinned to yourself, “Yeah, I do.”

You only started talking to Jean that night because you found him crying on the floor of the bathroom when you went to find your roommate. He was tipsy and had just seen his ex-girlfriend - who he was clearly not over - downstairs, dancing with another man. You had a bag of popcorn that your roommate begged you to make for her, but you instead offered it to Jean and joined him on the bathroom floor.

Jean tilted his head towards you, “Do you remember what you said to me?”

You looked into Jean’s eyes through your thick eyelashes, “Yes, I remember.”

While sitting on the bathroom floor together, Jean ranted to you about his ex-girlfriend and even the new guy she was dancing with. You heard about why they broke up, who she moved onto, and why he couldn’t bring himself to move on. You then leaned into his side on that bathroom floor, whispering one phrase you had been telling yourself for years.

Jean smiled to himself, “When you go looking for gold, you end up finding fool’s gold - so don’t go looking at all.”

“Let the gold come to you.” You whispered back to Jean, finishing your own quote from two years ago. You hadn’t known the words were so monumentous, you thought nothing of the quote and yet it stayed with him all of these years.

“I followed your advice,” Jean said matter-of-factly, “I followed your advice so well - actually - that I even started to push the gold away when it was just within reach.” Jean looked down at his fingers fiddling with the fabric of his slacks. “I set her up on a hundred horrible dates hoping I could forget about her for only a moment. But, I couldn’t forget about her, even if somebody wiped my memory.”

You felt your cheeks grow hot as you smiled at Jean, “That doesn’t even make sense.” Jean looked at like a wounded deer, wide scared eyes taking up all of your sight. “You can’t remember me if your memory was wiped - that’s not possible.”

“I’d manage,” Jean said with newly red cheeks, “I couldn’t forget you, even if the government tried to make me.”

You pushed Jean’s shoulder playfully, “Nuh-uh - you’re a liar, Kirstein.”

Jean shook his head, “Nope, I’ll always remember you.” He leaned his head in towards you. “I’ll remember your laugh and that little wrinkle you get between your eyebrows when I do something stupid.”

“Oh,” You said with a playful furrow of your brow, “‘You mean the wrinkle I get when you do anything?”

Jean grinned lightly, “Yeah, that one.” He continued leaning in closer until he was only a whisper away. “And how you taste like tropical fruits - like lemons and coconut.”

“And,” You whispered to his mouth, “How do you know what I taste like?”

Jean smiled, “I just intend on finding out.” His lips were pressed lightly against your own, his hand on the side of your head. “So, can I find out?”

You nodded, “Please do.”

Jean gently pressed his lips to yours, and the feeling made your stomach flip with excitement. You moved your legs closer to his, bare thighs on clothed thighs and the hem of your dress shifting up to your hips. You didn’t mind the new coldness spreading over your legs because your insides felt unbearably hot when kissing him.

The softness of Jean’s lips weren’t anything new to you. You had kissed Jean before, a soft smooch during a drunk game of spin the bottle - but never like this. His lips tasted like blueberry vodka last time you tasted them, but now his lips tasted like rosé and mint - a byproduct of the wine he had been drinking all night and the mint he sucked on before you ran off towards the bathroom - It wasn’t the best taste, but you weren’t complaining.

“I’m glad you waited for me,” You whispered into Jean’s mouth.

It became extremely clear to you at some point of the night just how much Jean means to you. Maybe because of one of the many times when you caught Jean’s eyes looking into your own. Or, one of the many times you noticed Jean talking to you when telling a story, as if you were the only one there with him. Or, one of the many times when you watched Jean fiddle mindlessly with the top of his wine glass, his eyes never leaving your frame - mentally undressing you in front of everybody in the restaurant and both of your dates.

He couldn’t help it though, he’s always loved how you looked in that black satin dress. It seemed everybody liked the dress, considering both Reiner and Pieck couldn’t keep their eyes off of your frame as well. Reiner and Pieck, who were still waiting at that table, hoping for some word from their dates who now found themselves sucking face in the women’s restroom.

“Jean,” You whispered, “We should head back.”

Jean sighed, “Okay.”

So, you did. You left the bathroom with Jean and eventually the restaurant, planning on going to where you normally did after dates - Jean’s apartment. It wasn’t easy saying goodbye to such a nice guy like Reiner knowing there wouldn’t be a second date, and it wasn’t easy saying no to Pieck’s offer of a second date with just her, and it especially wasn’t easy staring into that half-finished plate of polpette di cavallo until you and Jean finally made your exit.

The car ride was mostly quiet, both of you ignoring the obvious elephant in the room - what the hell happened in the bathroom. You didn’t regret the conversation on the bathroom floor or even the kiss that came afterwards, but you did regret ever cutting the kiss short. You searched your mind for some way back to that moment, thinking of a plan of either building and operating a time machine or trying again with Jean.

“So,” You said, “Pieck seems nice.”

Jean grinned to himself, “So does Reiner.”

You nodded slowly and turned to look out of the window, “‘Think there will be a second date with her?”

“If you’re having a second date with Reiner.” Jean spared a glance from the road in order to look at you. “‘Think there will be a second date with him?”

“Eh, he’s not really my type.”

Jean stopped the car at a red light. The color red seeped through the windshield, turning the inside of the car a bright crimson. Jean’s features were lit up by the light as his gaze danced across every inch of your face.

“He’s not?” Jean asked, “Then, what’s your type?”

You furrowed your brow, “Are you stupid?”

Jean smiled wide, “What are you saying?”

You shook your head and leaned forward, caressing Jean’s cheeks gently. You pressed your lips to his, smiling against his mouth. Jean kissed you back, quickly turning a sensual peck into a feverish makeout.

You felt Jean’s hands as they moved up the soft fabric of your dress. His fingers moved across your side and then wrapped around your body, landing on your back. He used the new position to pull you closer, much to your surprise considering the gasp that escaped from between your lips to the movement.

You wrapped your arms around Jean’s neck, pulling his face in closer. You pushed your tongue towards his mouth, and he gladly let it enter between his lips. You felt his breath hitch in his throat when you curled your tongue and swiped it across the roof of his mouth. Jean responded to the kiss with a tight grip on your dress only bringing you in-

A car suddenly honked it’s horn from behind you. Jean and you pulled apart as quickly as possible, ignoring that anything had happened. You slowly wiped your thumb across your bottom lip, smearing the wetness from the kiss onto your fingertip.

The rest of the ride was brutal, your desire for Jean was only getting unbearable. He didn’t even have to do anything. His fingers curving around the steering wheel made your heart pound. His slight head bob to the music quietly playing from the radio made your stomach inflate with nerves. And, his perfect posture in the driver’s seat made you want to groan with how badly you wanted him.

It was ridiculous, you were turning into a prepubescent boy - finding anything and everything Jean did as the epitome of attraction.

The car couldn’t have pulled into the apartment building’s parking lot any sooner. You were practically melting in Jean’s passenger seat and you needed to feel him again, you didn’t care why. You opened the car door and eventually walked alongside Jean towards his apartment complex.

You silently walked into the apartment building with Jean, and even rode up the elevator just as quiet. You waited beside him as he unlocked his apartment door. You watched as the muscles in his back moved under his shirt as he attempted to hold the door and unlock it at the same time - a trick the lock needed since the apartment was so old.

Once inside, you quickly kicked your shoes off, leaving them to lay with his shoes. You dropped your purse with the shoes as well, leaving it on the floor beside the door. And once you had discarded your unneeded items, you stood there - waiting for a sign from him, any sign at all.

Jean crossed his arms against his chest, his eyes landing on anything in the room but you. He peered across the kitchen and living room, even eyeing his bedroom door for a few seconds. Jean sighed before mumbling into the awkwardly silent room.

“So,” Jean said, “What do you want to do?”

You pressed your lips together, “I liked what we were doing in the car.” Jean suddenly looked at you, his eyes widened. “And, in the bathroom at the restaurant.”

Jean grinned to himself, “‘You wanna do that again?”

“Yes.” You nodded. “I do.”

Jean crossed the space between you, swooping his arms around you and pressing your chest into his. You bent your head upwards, giving Jean more room as his mouth pressed kisses into your neck and cheek. You giggled with your words as you attempted to speak.

“Jean,” You said as you pushed your fingers through his soft hair. You moved Jean’s face back enough to make eye contact with him. “‘Race you to the bedroom?”

Jean never thought he could let go of you in general, never mind quicker than he’s ever done anything before in his life. As soon as you were out his arms, Jean was running towards his bedroom door. You tried to beat him though, grabbing his arm and pulling him backwards, but nothing stopped him - he beat you into the bedroom.

You left the door open in front of you, standing back as Jean threw his discarded clothes from the bedroom floor and into his laundry basket - a half assed attempt at cleaning up. You supposed the gesture was nice, considering he wanted to clean up for you. But, it was even nicer knowing Jean had never seen his date with Pieck ending here.  

Your eyes peered across the entirety of his bedroom, something so familiar now with a different connotation. You’ve touched Jean plenty of times in this very room, but not the way you’re about to. You knew that after tonight, everything would be different between you two - but a good type of different that filled you with hope.

Your eyes landed on the alarm clock on his bedside table, the red numbers flickering suddenly from 11:59 to 12:00.

Second Sunday

Jean’s body weight was crushing on top of you, but a type of crushing weight that was comfortable. You swore you could live under Jean’s body for the rest of eternity. He was warm and strong and his kissing only made the position all that much better.

Your dress was on the floor and you were mostly naked, lying on Jean’s bed with only a bra and panties on. He pressed his bare chest into your chest, the only clothes on his body being his pair of slacks and the brown belt holding them up.

“Jean,” You breathed into his mouth, “I want you.”

Jean groaned against your lips, the sound coming from deep within his throat. He had never thought he’d hear those words from your lips, he never thought he’d be good enough to. But alas, here you were; underneath him, mostly naked, whispering gut wrenching phrases into his mouth.

You moved your hands down his lean body, dainty fingers finding the waistline of his pants. You undid the belt around his waist and threw it to the floor once it was out of the belt loops. You then brought your hands to his zipper, undoing that as well.

You pushed Jean’s slacks down his legs, moving them out of the way in order to free enough space for what you really wanted from him at the moment. You curled your hands around his body, digging your nails into his back in an attempt to bring him closer. You pressed your fingers into the small of his back as you bucked your hips upwards towards him.

You felt as Jean’s hardness pressed down between your legs, and you couldn’t help the moan that escaped from between your lips. Jean moved his lips from yours, allowing more panting breaths to escape from your mouth as he continued to press down into you. He instead kissed down your neck, taking in each moan and ingraining them into his memory.

You moved your fingers into the waistband of his boxers, and pushed them down over his hips. He was just as big as you had always assumed. You weren’t perverted or dirty minded per say, but some nights you’d catch yourself with an excessive amount of questions; you’d wonder about his size, if he were good in bed, and if he had ever satisfied a woman before.

Sure enough, your questions would be answered after tonight.

You brought your hips to his, feeling him through only one layer of clothing now. You brought your hips off of the bed, pushing your panties down over your thighs. You awkwardly moved your legs around Jean’s, attempting to kick the fabric to the floor.

Jean brought his mouth to your ear before breathily whispering, “Do you still want me?”

You nodded frantically, “Yes, yes- yes, please.”

Jean grinned at your response, finally bringing his hips to yours. It was a moment you had waited for for much longer than you thought. This moment was in the distance for two whole years, and now it was finally here. You had wanted this for so long, to the point where you’d take anything Jean would give you - such as a drunken peck and a date with nearly every man on campus.

Next Chapter

e m p t y / 9

shingeki no kyojin | series [various x male!amnesiac!reader] summary: [Name], an amnesiac boy awakes in a unknown place – trying to remember anything makes him have horrible headaches. Who is he? And why he can’t remember his own face? masterlist

chapter nine  — new mornings

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

They lived two years in Trost, but it took them one year to live on their own. Even with Lydia's protests —and Jean protested in secret, too—, Beatrice didn't want to be the burden she felt she was, and with her savings of the bread and pastries she did in the local bakery, it was enough for them to move to a house near the gates. Beatrice and [Name] couldn't stop thanking Lydia in opening the door of her home, taking them in as if they were family. [Name]'s mom had told him Lydia was a great friend in her past, before she moved to Shinganshina.

Even if the old memories of his past hometown tormented him in some way, along with his friends, he somehow enjoyed living in Trost. It was a nice place— Lydia was just as nice as Beatrice and Jean was a good friend. Before he knew it, their friendship went deeper and deeper, becoming really close. Jean always worried about [Name]'s headaches, every time trying to help in anything he could along with Lydia. The woman bought plenty of herbs with her own money to try and calm his migraines, and Beatrice nor [Name] could stop thanking her for it.

It become frequent how Jean couldn't stop himself and caress [Name]'s hair every headache— his eyes became softer when he frowned. It had become a reflex, somehow. [Name] didn’t mind— in fact, the teenager didn’t care at all about getting touchy. He liked taking Jean’s hand and play with it when they were bored sitting under a tree, or just lay his head on Jean’s legs to sleep.

At first it felt weird, but as Jean could feel butterflies in his stomach, he suspected what was happening. He got nervous when [Name] so normally and carelessly touched him like nothing, as if it was something anyone would do. Jean now believed Beatrice when she said [Name] was a social inept— all of what he was doing felt like they were lovers, and he didn’t even know it. Every time he did it, Jean blushed and averted looking at the boy, sometimes even evading touching him.

Jean knew very well what his feelings were but refused to believe it, it was obvious. Even his' and [Name]'s mom did. It was difficult to bear with it, even more when [Name] was oblivious about it. Why wasn't him more upfront? These couple years have made him more brutally honest than before, so why he couldn't confess to him? Was it fear? Maybe for rejection. Jean knew [Name] didn't know or wasn't interested in these topics— he had tried to question the boy before, but nothing came out of it. [Name] was uninterested, or maybe he have never felt something like that before, so he couldn't speak about it as if he knew.

__ __ __ __ __

“So [Name]...”

”Hmn?”

”Have you ever liked someone?”

”Liked...?” He looks to the sky, “well, yeah.”

”Really? Who?” He tried his best to sound uninterested about the topic.

”You,” Jean’s face blushed at that, but before he could get his hopes up [Name] followed with, “my friends from my hometown too... specially Armin.” And with that Jean went to the beginning, frowning with a twitch on his eye.

”not that type of liking! I mean If you have liked someone as in... love." He blushed, embarrassed by such thing to say.

“Like the books our moms read?” And he did sometimes too. Beatrice loved reading, specially romance novels. Armin and Beatrice had taught him reading books would be a good thing for learning about emotions, in some way. It could have sounded stupid— how someone didn't know what they feel? But [Name] didn't. He felt like a vessel still— these past experiences have helped a lot to grow his sentimental side, but there was more to know.

”Weird example, but yeah, like these cheesy stories.”

”hmn...” he had never thought about it— well, he liked Mr. Erwin a lot, but not as in love. “Don’t think so.” Maybe Beatrice? She says 'I love you' a lot to him, but he doesn't know if it's that particular form of love Jean is saying. "What about you?"

"W-Well— of course," he tried to sound 'cool' if that helped, "I've going out with some girls and—"

"That's not true. You are always with me." [Name] looks at him with a raised brow, obviously not believing his lie. Jean's facade faltered, but the teenager tried to change the attention to another topic.

"A-Anyways!" He laughed nervously, "have you ever kissed somebody?! BECAUSE I HAVE!"

"Kissed..." He blinked, deep in thought. [Name] didn't remember kissing anybody, but the sudden feeling of doing it is there. He touches his lips, wondering. "I don't think so."

Jean gulped, trying to play it off, "would you... like to try it?" He knew very well what he was doing— [Name] was unaware of these things, but it wasn't as if he was taking advances out of him, right? It was just... something for him to learn.

The amnesiac teenager blinks, staring at Jean. According to these books, a kiss meant something special, a sign of love. [Name] didn't know what love certainly was, so maybe trying kissing Jean would make something different? "Okay."

"O-Okay?! I-I mean—! A-Alright," Jean gulped, blushing. His heartbeat is erratic— he didn't actually believe [Name] agreed of something like this. Good thing they are in the forest near the walls— it would have been too embarrassing being looking at. Both of them kneeled in front of each other, [Name] looking at him with his head tilted. Jean averted his gaze, trying to calm himself.

He sighs, ready. Getting near [Name]'s face, his hands shake. The amnesiac teenagers gets near too, but Jean freezes. His eyes widen, not knowing what to do. Surprisingly, [Name] is the one who initiates the kiss— his hand supporting on the ground to get nearer Jean as he closes his eyes. It's clearly an inexperience kiss— but Jean's heart felt like it was going to explode. It's such a gentle and soft gesture, a curious action. Before he knows it, [Name] is pulling away with a humn. Jean is completely red, he is happy about what just happened, but he knows he can't get his hopes up with [Name], remembering how he usually is.

Nobody talks— [Name] tilts his head, touching his lips while Jean is still shocked by the kiss. What did [Name] feel? Did he like it? Did he realize something?

"S-So, what do you think?"

"I don't know."

"W-What?"

"It's... different, but I don't feel something else about it," Jean's heart crashes as he hears these words. He had a little bit of hope something would change, but it seems it didn't. "You?"

The taller teenager sighs, clenching his jaw. "Same." His excitement and happiness fade away as quickly as they appeared. Maybe this would be the first and last time he took advantage of [Name] like this— a kiss was something hurtful but wonderful at the same time. 'Love' surely hurt a lot.

__ __ __ __ __

Love was something unknown for him, and for now, he didn't look interested by it. Jean hoped sometime he would have taken a more liking to him after that kiss, but Jean knew that was unlikely. So he hided his feelings, in hope of someday he could show them when the time was right. But obviously he took advances of [Name]'s touchy behavior— when he laid his head on Jean's lap, he played with [Name]'s hair. Or sometimes when the other rested his head on his shoulder, Jean would rest his head on the other's, smelling his hair.

This situation was annoying.

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

Beatrice lived in fear of hearing those words— living the day he would leave to chase his dream. She didn't want to appear sad in front of her boy, so his anguish and sadness were showed with Lydia. The woman tried to comfort Beatrice as best as she could— but both of them knew their boys would leave them soon.

But it was time, and Beatrice knew from the start it was going to come sooner nor later. She always hoped he could change his mind, but his mind was set the first time he heard about the military. But she couldn't stop him, could she? She couldn't stop her husband nor son, and look what happened.

"Mom..." He spoke, stopping eating. Hearing such tone made Beatrice's heart hurt— that was it, "I'm going to enlist to the military."

She didn't say a word for some minutes, worrying [Name] by it. Beatrice had never got silenced over anything, but he knew he touched a sensible spot. She relieved some memories about her husband and a son he didn't know anything about— they left, enlisted to the survey corps and as many expected, they died in combat. It was painful and difficult to accept such thing again, but Beatrice can't forever hold a bird who wants to be free.

"Is that what you really want?" She hold her tears and her voice from breaking, but [Name] saw trough the facade easily. It was the second time felt something like heartbreak, seeing her like this. He stood up from his seat and keeled besides her, hugging her waist and resting his head on her legs. She caressed his hair, not holding the tears anymore. [Name] shut his eyes, some tears slipping and wetting Beatrice's dress.

"Yes."

"I see."

They stayed like that for a long time.

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

It was pretty difficult accepting he was going to leave. Surprisingly, Jean was going to enlist too, but he had told his mother he was going to join the Military Police, and not the Survey Corps like [Name].

When Jean knew where [Name] was going to join in the end, he almost had a heart attack. He couldn't believe something so idiotic, reckless. Was he insane? But, most importantly, didn't he care they were going to... separate if that happened? They wouldn't see each other again. Jean was mad, and even when he voiced his worries to his friend he didn't listen.

"But what are you thinking?! It's the survey corps!" He tried to reason.

"Yeah, I know it's the survey corps. That's why I will join them." He stated, not bothered by Jean's yelling. The taller boy only got railed up by such behavior— didn't he care?

"But you could die, do you know that?" He desperately tries to talk a sense to him, "many of them don't come back!"

"I know, Jean. But... that's what I have to do." [Name] knew he had to join them— after all, they found him outside these walls. His answer had to be out there, somewhere.

"What you have to do?" He snorted, "aren't you thinking about Beatrice?" About me?

"Jean, I will join the survey corps. It was decided since the beginning."

"You don't care about anyone, do you?!" Jean couldn't stop his anger— [Name] was cruel when he wanted, even if he didn't mind to. He sighs, passing his hand trough his hair exasperatedly, "whatever." He left without turning back, he was angry and felt betrayed. Jean knew if he stayed any longer he would say things he didn't mean and turn the situation worse,

[Name] frowned, clearly sad about how things turned out. His hand tried to reach Jean, who disappeared without even sparing a last glance at him. He felt something heavy on his chest, and the same static noise overcome his ears. He did something wrong— but this is what he wants, and he can't turn back from his decision. But why is he feeling so sad? Just as he lost Eren, Mikasa and Armin? Was it so important to Jean where he wanted to go? It was his life— not his'. Was he being cruel? Just thinking about begin mistaken caused another headache to appear.

  P̵̣̫̱̮̼̲͔̰͈͙̈́̈̎̏̈́͠ī̷̞̥͍̙̓̈́̊͘t̷̛͕̝̓͐̓̋̄͑̎͋̉̊̈́̚̚ĩ̶͚̲͙̞̮̺͓̟͖͙̯̊̽͜͝f̴̡̺̬̟̭͙͕̙͚̯̟̹̱̹̩͐̈́̄̈͂̈́̈́͊̎̾̊̓̒͘ȗ̸̝̜͔̍̎̚ͅl̸̛̥͈̘̆̽̎͊̊͂͑̎͜ͅ.̵̧̢̢̛̮̘̤̭̳͔̈͒͗͒̔̍̇̈́̂͝͝͠͝ͅ ̸̨̦͔͙̫̙͉̝̭̣̮̫̤̪̎́̈̊̂̈́̓̆̋͝͝ͅD̶̛͖̹̣̲̘̫̭͕͔̊͒̾̃͊̓̊̀͂͊̕͝͠ǒ̶̧̧̢͉̳͉͔̪̻̠̗̲̜̒̄̀͜ͅn̶̮̻̮͍͔͚̲̝̮̪̖͇̠͂͌̀͌͂'̷̢̨̥̖̟̘̟̖̗̪̜̌̈́̋̃ͅͅt̶͒͐͊̈́̄̐̉̓͋̽̊̓͜͠ ̸̼͉̘͚̈́͛l̵̨͕͓̂͗̓̾̑̈́͠͠ͅị̷̛̭̹̺̂̌̇̊̐̀̍̎̂̋̔͘͠ş̶͕͔͈͎̻͖̪̀̏͊̌ţ̶̢̜͔̪̱͍͈̞̭̯͎͑̐͌͊̾͜͝ȩ̴̛̥̺̄̿̀͐͑͒̓̈́̋̄͋n̸̨̠͐̔͋͗̿͒͐ ̸̠͇̻͕̗͎̇̂̌̐̒̈́̕͝͝t̶͔̤̮͆͊̃͝o̵̡̪̦̙̲͆̈̂̑͜ͅ ̶̼̙̤͆͌͠ą̶̛͍͚̦͇͓̥̯̟͑̿̐̇̈́̈́̔̌̊ͅn̴̢̩̺̪̂̒̆͛̄̇̂ŷ̴̢̡̢̛̳͕̹̝̲̖̻̇͗͒͐̓͗̒͌̚ͅǫ̴̮͈̤̖͆̈́͑̃͆̾̌̿̐́͋̊͠n̴̠̬̫̪͐̈͑̇͌̅̎̓̑ȇ̶̡͇́̆̈́.̷̢̣̩̖̫͖͕̊͌̓̍͛̈́̌̂̓͘

But he's my friend...

Jean stopped talking with [Name] after that. The amnesiac teenager never felt so much sadness before— after all, Jean was his close friend. Beatrice could only guess what happened between them, and she couldn't possibly blame Jean. Seeing how [Name] stayed in his room all day made her worried— the boy was always under his blankets, and when he came down to eat, he was wrapped around his blankets still. Even if he looked so adorable like that, Beatrice couldn't feel happy when his expression screamed absolute sadness. She knew the best was for the two to talk it out, but seeing Jean nor [Name] tried to fix this, she decided to do a small step— talk to Jean. She have talked to [Name], but the boy didn't even wanted to leave to room.

When Beatrice talked to Lydia, the woman had realized something was wrong the moment her son returned so angry. He had come straight to his room and closed the door with such force that it was heard everywhere in the house. But he didn't shut himself in his room too much, thankfully.

When Jean came downstairs and saw Beatrice, he frowned and clenched his jaw. The woman could see his distress and maybe embarrassment— maybe he thought she would lecture him or something.

"Hello Jean," Beatrice smiled, hearing a small 'hi' from the boy as he sat down with her, "I know you know why I'm here for, right? But don't worry, I'm not mad at you."

Jean didn't spoke, rather, he looked down as he crossed his arms.

"[Name] is sorry about what happened— it's not that he doesn't care, it's more that... he really wants to know what's outside. He cares a lot about you, you know? But you know how he is with his feelings."

The boy doesn't talk. Rather, he sighs heavily, trying to think. If [Name] was just a neighbor he barely knew, he couldn't care less, but he wasn't. It was his friend, the person he liked— his life. Why he couldn't just stay with him?

"It's stupid," Jean said, "joining the survey corps? Is he insane?"

She chuckled, "I know. But you can't trap a bird forever, Jean. It will eventually fly away when they see the opportunity— that's how [Name] is. He has his mind set, and he will not change any time soon, even if the world tells him otherwise."

"Aren't you... angry?" Jean asked, frowning. Was she okay with the fact [Name] was going to join the survey corps? And possibly die?

She smiled sadly, looking down, "Not angry... just sad," she looks at Jean, "you can't decide or force someone to decide what to do with their life, can you? Just look at it in reverse— if [Name] tried to reason with you to join the branch you don't want to be, would you? After your mind is set?"

He fell into silence. But it was different, right? The Military Police was safe. The Survey Corps wasn't— both of them could live together, even. Nevertheless, imagining [Name] bugging him to join together would only irritate him. Averting Beatrice's gaze, he crossed his arms in defeat,

"I can't make him, can I?"

"Not even me." She smiles, but not a happy one. It's empty, and Jean can see trough it, "oh, and also..." She laughs, "you should do something with these feelings of yours."

The teenager's face becomes red at hearing the call out— he frowns, trying to ignore his blush. "W-What feelings?! I'm mad at him! Not- Not in..."

"Love?" She chuckles, "just remember one day you two won't be together. Time doesn't wait, so be fast."

He groans, rubbing his neck. Beatrice claps, widening her eyes with a devilish grin.

"And also! Who knows who will take interest of him! My boy has become reaaaally handsome, Jean. I'll say act fast!"

"M-Miss Beatrice!"

"I'm just saying, dear!"

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

The amnesiac boy was miserable. Jean didn't want to talk to him, and [Name] didn't insist after that. If he didn't want to talk, then that was fine. But [Name] couldn't stop feeling so... sad. If it was Eren who fought with, his younger self wouldn't have cared as much as he did now. Since when did he change? Well, maybe it wasn't if he changed or not— he liked Jean. He enjoyed being with him and he helped him with his headaches, and more importantly, his voice wasn't annoying. [Name] grunted, hiding his face under the blankets.

[Name] didn't answer when he heard a knock on his door— he didn’t even paid attention of who the footsteps belonged to. Not until the person spoke, recognizing Jean.

”[Name]? Are you there?”

Jean? [Name] turned at the door, still wrapped around his blankets. He blinked,

"[Name]...?"

The amnesiac boy quietly got up from his bed, slightly opening the door just a little gap, his tired eyes prying outside the room to see Jean. The other jumped in surprise by the squeak the door made, along with seeing the unusual dull eyes looking at him.

"Can I... come in?" He gulped as [Name] fully opened the door for him to enter, closing it after. The amnesiac boy sit down on his bed, still covered in blankets. Honestly, Jean thought he looked adorable like this— but that wasn't important right now!

There was silence. Surprisingly, [Name] was the one who spoke first.

"I don't want you to be mad at me..." He looked down, playing with his fingers. His plain expression was the same, but his tone of voice changed. It was like a hurting child.

Jean sighed heavily, rubbing his neck. He didn't like being mad with him either— but he was justified, wasn't he? Maybe not but... he didn't like the idea of joining the survey corps one a bit. He wouldn't, that wasn't for him at all.

"Me neither," He sat down besides [Name], who didn't look at him still. "It's just... I don't want you to... die."

"I won't." He looked at Jean with a different expression he couldn't pin point, "I promise."

"Yeah yeah..." He didn't believe it— but knew [Name] was strong. Even if he still didn't accept hat he wanted to do, maybe, just maybe he could change his decision in the future, right? "I'm not mad, okay?" He looked at him with a clear frown in his face. Jean wasn't happy, neither angry— just... sad about not getting his way this time.

Silently, [Name] wrapped him around his blankets too, sharing them. "Joining branches will take time, so let's enjoy our time together." The corner of his mouth slightly raised, taking Jean's hand. He blushed clearly— how couldn't he? "Let's lay down."

Obeying, the two boys laid together on the bed, looking at each other. Jean averted looking at [Name] with a blush, while the other looked thoughtful. Can he hear my heartbeat??? Fuckfuckfuck—

"I haven't told you the reason why I want to join." That gained Jean's interest, forgetting about his little problem, "but don't tell anyone, alright?"

Then, he explained his first memory, who and how they found him and how he met Beatrice. Seeing it like this Jean understood, but wasn't he scared after seeing the titans? He never understood how the titans didn't scare him off when they took over Shinganshina— he admired him in secret, but he wouldn't say that out loud. Even so, it interested him where [Name] was from— that was why his eyes were different from everyone's? But outside the walls... that was impossible. No one lived outside— only titans.

"So that's why you want to go..." He closed his eyes, blushing, "just because I stopped being mad doesn't mean I still like the idea, o-okay?!"

The sound provided from the amnesiac boy surprised him— [Name] was chuckling. It was the first time hearing him like this. After all, him reacting like this was something rare. "Okay," he answered as he closed his eyes, "let's sleep."

Jean looked at [Name], still blushing. He was so... handsome but pretty at the same time. He looked so peaceful and gentle like this. Jean would never ever in his life would say that he always watched the boy in secret when they shared the bed together when they were younger, along with many secrets and memories he will hold everyday. He didn't want him to go someday— the thought only made him angry. This wasn't fair.

"And also! Who knows who will take interest of him!"

Remembering Beatrice's words made him almost grunt, covering his face. He wouldn't allow that! ...Would he?

  B̵̡̨̹̰̝̙̱͎͖̙̙̯͖̬̿̿̀̀̎̊͌͝ḙ̵̡͓͕̙͙̳͚̬̠͐͐̓̌̉̒͘͝͝ì̸̧̟̝̟̥̠̺̦̫̯͈͗̌̈́̒͂͑͆̄̈́̀̓͜͠n̴̨̡̪̗̜̮͇̳̮̟̼̗͇͒̋̊ͅͅg̴̥͇̼̹̮̻̼̬͉̺̲̝͐͊̏͋͑͜ ̵̢̺͑̃̈́̈́̈́͆̅͂̚̚̚ẅ̶̻̲͕͚͖̕ͅį̶̯͓͆͌̕͜͝t̷̜͉͎̫̘̝̠̣̰̲͕̫͓́̎͂̎h̷̺̼͕͔̹̪̮̜͚̯͐̎̉̎͐̇̽͒̃͝ͅ ̴͔̲̻̺̙̉̀̅̃̿̊͒̋̎̓͆̚̚̚ơ̸͎̜̜̣͊̔̂͊̉̌́͆͆̑̓͗t̶̘͇̟̦̩̞̰͉̱̰̖̜̱͕̐̆͋̒̈́͆͋͝͠͠͝ͅh̴͚͐͊̊̌̇ͅͅȩ̸̳̤̪̖̹͈̥͔̩̠̥̅̄̔̅̈́͋̓̒̚͝͝r̸͖͙̖͓̆s̴̨͙͔̦͙̃͑̅̈́͒̏̇͆̈́̾͊͝ ̸͓̹̫͇̺̭͉̙͗͜ȏ̵̺̘̱̮̜̟̗ņ̴̛̳̖̮̝̒̈́͋̽̌̅͊͊̚͝͠͠͝ͅl̵͍̻̜̖͑̋̿̃̈́͝ͅy̷̢͎͉͙̖͔͍̜͉͓̩̣̼̅̏͘ ̸̨̧̳̱̆̽̉̐͝w̴̧͚̗͎͍̳̣͇̣͍͍̜̣̔̒̅ǐ̷̤̦̰̫̱̃͌̈ͅl̷̡͚̰͔̼̩̦͖̬̼͍͖͗̒̐͝l̶̡̙̳͖̘̤͋̑̈́̈́̅̓̈́́̄̃̋͠ ̶̬̻͉͉̞̞͙̝̺͖̂ͅc̷̢̣͙̝̞̻̬͔͙̕ǎ̶̡̘̝̥̳̪̮͔̫̒́̆̈̀̐̏̑̕͝͠u̸͓͛̈́̌̑̐̅̒̆̿͆̋s̷̗̙̙̩̰̮̤̤̼̥̪͓̝̰̎̍̒̿͆̏͆̓̍̚͝ͅe̸͖͈̺͓̪̽͌ ̴̛͖̲͓̟̳͍̤̍͌̅̔̒̽̍̽͘̚h̵̢̡͚̺̩̻̉͂̓ī̴͔͇̙̝̓̓̿̐͗̈́̒͝m̴̥̘̱̦͚̹̱̳̻͂̂͗̏̾͌̑̿̆̂̃̄́̅͜ ̸̢̨̢̛̼͎͈̫̲̗̬̺̞̞̅̍͑̈́̍̚ͅš̴̨̝̻͙̘͇̞̠͕̠͎̫̐̈́̌͘͠͝͠͠u̷͚̝̗̜͉͔̪̙̣̪͓̦̝̲͗̐́̿̈́͋́͠f̸̢͙͈̲̘̙͈̱̈̾͒̊̕f̶̧͖̬̻͖͙̥̫̆̾͆́͒̀́̽̀̇̇̾ͅḙ̷̢̡͍͕̟͉͓̮̲̰͕̙͓̋̂̆͠ŗ̷̛̬͓̼̲͍̻̰̥̜̙̺̓̂̇͑̆̄̕͘͝͝͠į̴̜̬̹̥̘͚̘͉̲͎̜̆̈́͑̓n̷̥̏g̷̻̳̯̞̬͚̘̯̿̿.̴̧̹͖̱͔̙͙̳̣̾̂̕ͅ

L̴͚̗̄̂͐̏͐̆̓̕ĕ̶̡̤̳̠̹̪̹̰͔͕̑̏͌̈́ͅt̵̢̳͓͈̃̏̈́͗͗̌̈̄̀̓̄̆ ̶̭̹̦͕̞͈̲̙̙̺̈́̓̋͌̒̎̂̅̀̚̕͝͠ͅţ̴̧̡̱̥̲̥̗̲̮͇̜̬̙̳̈̏̍̾͋̽̎̆̈́̋̎̐̕͝ẖ̸̡̛̳̙̞̪̫̫̮̺͇̳͇͔̞͌̾͑̍̒̚̚͘͝͝e̸̼͐̈͋̑̀̅͐͆̓̕͠ ̶̨͖̯͇͖͓͍͓̩̍̌͂̅̈́b̷̢͈́͂͒̂̍̂̈́̍̎̏̉͊͆͘ơ̷͈̼̝̩̰̭̥̻̩̿̿̒́͜y̶̭̽̈́̈́͊̈̆͠ ̵͙̜̻́̇̆̓̑̌͊̾̌͛̎̑́͠b̷̧̥͍͍̞̍̑ę̴̧̯̗̩̥̭̰͕̓̃́̍͂̄͋̓̐̄̌͛̃̕͜.̴̧̬̫͚͔̭̝͉́̓͌̑̂̉̈̊͠ ̸̨̡̨̛̬̳̺̪̪͇͐͛́̑̾̈́̽̓͗̒̈́̚͝͠ͅY̶̜̪̟̳͍͖̥̼̭͉̭̼͐́̂̓̑̎́̇̋̕͜͝ͅớ̷̠̮̬̲̒̍̎͑̑͐̕u̶̢̢̮̺͓̘͈̠̟̰̱̞̥̣̓ͅ ̶͉̠̲̣̖͊̍̾̀̅̋̏͜k̵͈͂̒̋̃̽͊̈́̽̈́͆͂n̸̛̜̠͉̳̤̥̟̘̟̬̻͕͇͆̍̊̑͋̈̾̄̉̀͊͘̚͜ͅo̸̡̮̗͇̺̦̺͚̱̠̞͓̭̓̐̕ͅŵ̸͙̉̉̈́̑̎̌̓͊̅̿̒͝ ̶̡̟͍͙̜̽̅͑͌̑͜͜͝͝w̸̡̩͈̩̹̤̙̝̒̑̾̂̌̎̚͠h̷̺̜̖̒̈́̓͝ă̶̜̥̖̘͔̹͐͐̓̈́̀̅̊̐̌̈̍̀͘͝t̵̗̥̲̚ ̷̨̩͗̍̈̈́́̈́͑̓̋̈̕͝ẉ̸̛̽͆̎͗̉͌̂̓̈́̃̿̋̍͜͝ĩ̴̛̛͍̺̣̲͍͋̀̀́͊̍͝͝l̷̛̠͚̰̊́̉̒̏͐̓̐͘̕̕l̸̬͍̤̠͓̠̬̃ ̷͍̥̭͉͉͍̞͔͎̯̺͎̑̾͌̾̈́h̶̨̢͖̯̫̮̭͑͜ẩ̷̰̩͙̰̲̳̹͗̊̑̈́̂͝͝p̴̡̡̛͇͎̮̟͍̥̯̂̔͜͠p̷̫̤̝̗̣͎̃͋̉͑́̋̈̎̾͌͝ͅẽ̶̼̠̳̙̬̉͒̾͂̄̂̽̍̍̐̈͠͝n̸͚̲̤̹̘̥̼̉̅͗̏̔͆̈̕͘̕ͅ ̴̨̛̛̟̦̬̺̫̣̯͓̜͖͎͆̍͑̄͗̑̊͘͝ļ̸̣̫̖̫̘̎̈́͋͌̿̽̊͑̚͠ả̷̩̣̮̫̐͊̽͊̃͠t̷̺̣̘͋e̶̙͓̯̜̭̗̥͉̫̎͛̆̀̓͊̚͜͜͝ͅr̴̩͔̗̔͛.̸̧̖̤̰̱̻͓̂͊

  [Name]'s whimpers took his attention. The amnesiac boy was frowning, and Jean knew exactly what was happening.

"Your head again?" He unconsciously placed his hand on [Name]'s forehead, worried. The touch somehow calmed him a little.

"I tried to remember— bad choice." He sighed, hiding his face onto Jean's chest, making the teenager blush completely again. He knew [Name] could hear his heartbeat— calm yourself! Clenching his jaw, he hugged the boy closer, looking at the side in shyness. He had to enjoyed while it lasted— soon they will be in the military, and doing things like this in front of everyone would be embarrassing, wouldn't be? He only wished time didn't go as fast.

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

This was the day.

[Name] packed his stuff with the help of his mother, she doing most of the talking. She didn't want to cry, so the best she could so was to keep her mind occupied in talking and helping.

"You are such a handsome boy now, I can't believe it..." She sighed, "You are getting taller too..."

"Do you think so? Jean is still taller than me."

"He had grow up so much too... And to think it has been only two years." She laughed, "I can't wait to see how the military has shaped you."

They finish quickly, after all it isn't much. They leave the house, stopping at the entrance. There's silence— both of them see the path where everyone is going. After all, today was the day to enlist, and many teenagers were already leaving their homes. [Name] turns to see Beatrice, who is deep in thought.

She sighs, "you can come back if you can't take it, alright? No one will think less of you!" She takes him and kisses him all over, receiving a chuckle from [Name].

"Okay, mom."

"Don't forget to visit! I will sent you letters, okay? If I can I will sent you some cookies too!" She kisses him, "do your best, and make a lot of friends, please? When you come back in your free time, come with your friends! A lot of food will await you."

With a last hug and more kisses, [Name] leaves. When Beatrice can't see him anymore, tears fall from her face as she tries to hold her sobs. She wipes them, but the tears won't stop from falling. She's horribly sad and broken, but she knows this is the right choice for him. After all, he belongs somewhere else.

"Please come back safe..."

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

"There you are," Jean says, already waiting for him in their usual spot. They agreed to go together, as always, "thought you changed your mind."

[Name] let his tongue out, making Jean snort. "Never." They return on their walk, following the others teenagers to their new future.

I hope... they are there.

T̵̨̨̛̠̤͇̩̩͈̤̪͖̮̜̜̼̣̳̟̝̫͒͒͂̽͛̒͑̍̇̒͆̚͝h̶̩̜̳͔͍̱̳̺͍̲̩͔̥̠͍͚͈̑̃̐̾̇́̓͐͑̔̚͝e̶̫̭̬̩̰̝̬͎̰̿͋̓̒̅̉̉̎͗̕͜y̵̨̢̲͓͇͓͔͓͐̽̃͆̿̓̕͘ ̶̛̣̗̪̙͒̑̊͂̈́͒̏̔ẅ̷̢̧̨̛̬̗̮̳̣̙͉̟̫̣̬̮̲̲̬͔̑̓̒̉̾͠ḭ̵̬̲͉̱̲͕̱͕̞͉̯͎̯̘̤̙̠̻̽̽͋̀͑̓̂̍͆̉̽͐̍͑̋ͅl̸̢̡̧̬̟̞̻̩͈͓̙̙̻̺̲̭̤̦̼͉̖̩̻̩̣̓͗̐̊̓ͅļ̵̧̢̢͖̼̤̲̩̙̥̖̘̜̭̗̫̗̮͓͔̗̦̗͖̱̎̃̇̈́̊͋͑͌̓̀̐̀̏̔͋͋͋ͅ.̷͎̖̲̈́̋̑̈́̅̈́͆̈̓͛̾̐͊͋̐̓̌̈́̔͑̔̑̔̽

e m p t y / 8

shingeki no kyojin | series [various x male!amnesiac!reader] summary: [Name], an amnesiac boy awakes in a unknown place – trying to remember anything makes him have horrible headaches. Who is he? And why he can’t remember his own face? masterlist

chapter eight — after dark

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

The travel to the refugee was awfully slow. [Name] felt horrible all the way there, bearing the voices of adults and children suffering around him. Not even Beatrice hugging his head on her chest calmed his nerves. The poor boy still thought about his friends and what they where doing. If they were still alive.

He knew when the boat stopped because Beatrice told him as she got up, helping him stand up. [Name] hugged her leg, trying to hide from nothing in particular. He was tired, and so was Beatrice. Everyone followed the soldiers who guided them to the refugee, every person with torment in their expressions.

“Everyone! Get in line for the supplies! Women and children first!” A soldier yells to all the people, guiding them to where the food was. Multiple boxes were placed behind a desk where another soldier was preparing the supplies.

The soldier guided the women with their children first. Beatrice and [Name] got bread and water— the soldiers had said if they gave more there wouldn’t be more supplies for the next boats. Some people began to shout and yell against it, but the word was final. Beatrice thanked the officer and took [Name]’s hand, walking to the opposite direction of that place.

“What is going to happen now?” [Name] asked, not feeling hungry at all. His huge appetite was gone after such thing.

Beatrice was deep in thought. She had no family outside Shinganshina— her parents passed away a long time ago. Her husband’s family had practically dishonored him, and they wouldn’t talk to them. She knew if they go to where they were, they wouldn’t be welcomed. It would have been just a waste of time and energy.

“Maybe..." She whispers, nodding to herself, "we'll go to Trost. I have a friend who may take us in, if not..." She looks at [Name]'s eyes full of worry, but she smiles to calm him. "We'll manage, like we have always done, right?"

"Yeah..."

"I'll go to ask something to the soldiers. Stay here, alright? I'll come back quick." Beatrice smiled at him and left, leaving him alone. [Name] sat on a empty box far away from the group of people, resting his elbows on his knees.

He was upset, but he couldn’t cry. There was no sight of his friends here— he didn’t even hear them. Were they alright? Were they still inside that mess? He couldn’t even sent a letter— to where? They had no home. Shinganshina was no more. His house, Beatrice’s and his’ stuff... only the memories remained. But was that even a good thing? He couldn’t just resign— he couldn’t let them win.

[Name] frowned, feeling rage inside him. His home was lost, but not forever. Until he grows and enlists to the military, their home could at least have some possibilities to be regained. He just had to enlist to the survey corps and be free.

Where did we hear that before?

W̷̨̜͈̫̥̜͍͕̪͉͎͇͙̆͐̒̋͂̆̐̊̋͌̓̉̈́͋̾͝͝͠ē̷̡̲͇͖͙̭͓̹̃̓̓̈́̓͊̄̍̿͑̈́̈ͅ ̴̜̝̞̳͈̳̩̘̠̥̙͇̥̋̔̍̕͜a̶̢̛̯͇̠̙̺̦̹͇͍̤̤̬̜̾͗̒͆͌̔͛̃͐̈́͂͆̀̐̆̾r̷̢̡̡̞̱͙̤͙̪̟͉̪̘͕̳̗̓̇̾̊̒͝e̶̢̡̧̮̹̩̅n̷͙̜̩͖̹͍͇̖̯͗͂̓̄ͅ'̸̧̧̖̼̙́͋̍̃̔̄͛͊̌͘ẗ̸̛̟̪͙̼̽͂͗̔̄͆̆̍̍͗̋̾̑͠ ̶̧̛͉͈̤̲̹̬͎͔͕̬̹̈̏͂͒̾̊̒͌̽͗̍͐͘͝f̷̛̜̝͓̫̹̰̞͈̜̺̜̿̽̓̒̈́̊̾̐̏͌̈́̓̕̕͝͝r̸̛̖̽̒̓̀͌̾͆̌͝ē̷͕̻͙̘̥̼̟̱͙̳̜̠̖̟̪̰͆̐̍̃̅́̾͆̾̇͑͝ͅĕ̸̢̳̘̘̺̞͈̻͍̣̎̽̈͆̈́̂̑͗͘ͅ.̵̨̰̙̘̻̘̭̞̯͖̠̹͕͋̉͌̓̇͗

A huge pain felt on his head, making him whimper and hold it as he frowned with his eyes closed. He heard a voice, but he couldn’t understand what it said. Like the whisper he heard before— but this was different. Whatever it was caused him a lot of pain. [Name] wondered now what could he get to calm his pain, now that Dr. Jaeger wasn’t here no more. Did he make it? Did miss Carla make it too? So many people he wondered about could be lost, hurt, or even dead.

He was hurt.

Now that his headache was over, the boy’s eyes wandered around. He didn’t want to see the horror and misery some people had on their faces, so he averted them completely. It was enough with the sounds of their voices and the cry of children for his ears. When is Beatrice returning?

His [hair color] eyes catch something falling— bread? As three kids pass trough, not noticing they lost something. The boy stands up, taking the food from the floor and hurriedly walks to the three kids, immediately taking their attention. “Hey! You dropped this,” they turn around, and when [Name] meets the gaze of the tallest kid, he can’t help but wondering something, blinking repeatedly.

“Oh? Uhm, thank you.” The blond speaks first, taking the bread [Name] is handing over. It is noticeable the [hair color] haired boy is focused on their taller friend, and he can help but grow worried by it.

“Uh... a–are you ok?” The taller kid gently speaks, while the blonde girl stares at the quiet boy in front of them, wary.

The amnesiac boy tilts hid head, confused by the familiar feeling the tallest boy’s eyes have— it was... as if he saw them before. Somewhere else, but he can’t remember. “Have we met before?” He bluntly asks, getting slightly near the kid, seeing his eyes.

The sudden question does shock them a little— they are sure they have never meet this kid before, that was for sure. And even so, they don’t recognize from nowhere.

“I—I don’t think so!” The tall boy sweats, gulping.

The blond girl focuses on the stranger kid— but blinks repeatedly as she focuses on his unusual eyes. Her own eyes widened slightly, as if she recognizes him. Her expression returns to normal in a second, crossing her arms.

“Your eyes... are different.” She speaks loudly, making her friends turn at her in surprise before focusing on the kid’s eyes, holding their shock. They look at each other as if they were reaffirming something, but [Name] doesn’t notice or cares about it.

The [hair color] haired boy blinks unbothered, “they are.” [Name] lets out an ‘ah’, remembering where he had to be right now. Beatrice had told him not to leave the spot, thing that he obviously did. “Sorry for the sudden... question, but I have to return. Good... luck?” He tries to finish the weird interaction, his social skill obviously lacking. He turns around to leave, but the male blond takes his hand before he does.

The blonde reacts first before he leaves, taking his wrist. But as soon as they touch, the amnesiac boy feels a shock. [Name] feels in a daze for a couple of seconds, as if he’s seeing something that isn’t there, but it seems the other kid didn’t feel the same thing because he doesn’t react. "Wait! What’s your name?”

T̴̛̬͒̈̅͗͘̕h̷̩͓͉̝͂̂̇̈́̍̿̈́́̐̿̎̿̒̚ĕ̷̢͕͎͉͈̠̲̝̞͈̪̲̗͔̲̯̣̬͚̓̽̈͊͒̋̔̈́̑̃̅͝y̵̨̨̝͕̺͂͒͋̏̂̈́̈̉͒̉̒̃̓̒̐̔̚͝͠ ̷͈̉̾͌̈́̾̃̀͑̌ͅä̸̜̺͈͖͇͕͍̣̜̝̫͕̦͉̂̇͋͊̌͐͐̋͂͘r̴͚̦̞̗̙͚̽̀̾̌e̸̡͍̥̮̱͎̠̤̩͕͛̓̎̾̌͐̈̍̿͌̉̊̚͜ ̴̠̪̉̾͋͆̌͗̕͘͝h̴̛̛̜̲͎̘͚͉̪͓̎̒̊͋͌̅̋̀͂̓̋̈́̓͐͑̈́͂̊̚͜ĕ̷̡̽̈́̐̀͑̏̎̔̎͘ȑ̴̨̧̢̨̯̪̭̥͍̲̰̭͎̟̳͎̳̮̯̻̍̎́ë̷̛̲̺̳̯͇̲̥͙͖̠̫̯̹̪̬͙̠̮͇̖̉̊̉̌̅͑͑̑̍͗̏ ̵̧̥̣̟̹̄̆̊̆̄͛̏̅̅̑̿͊̈́̐̚̚͜͝͝͝ȁ̴̡̡̢̧͚͓̳̘̰̮̤̠̼̪̟̩̭͇̳͒l̵̨̲̫̜͖̪͉̙̝͈̞͇̪̬͔̠̺̺̖͍̼͒̆͛͒̋̌̓̾̑̅͗̂̑͆̉̿̕͝r̶̤̱̙̖͎͍̭͙̳̬̐̐̑ȩ̷̣̫͔͓͚̺̯͆̋͗͆̀̔̽̈̂͜͜͝ą̵̡̹̤͎̪͙̟̙̰̻͙̝̺͕̖͉̍̽͛̇͂̐̊̋̏͂̂̉̊͐̓͌̄͂͜͝ͅd̵̡̛̟̲̉͗͂͌͛̓̏͌̆͗̎͌̕͝͝͝ỷ̶̡̼͎͇̮̫̹̝͎̭̱͙̲̟̞̀̌̿͘͜.̶̨͙͔̪̣̮̠̋̈́͒̈́̓̐̈́̂̒̿͂̀̾̐̀͝ͅ

“[Name].” He answers bluntly, blinking and shacking his head to shake off the weird feeling.

“Uh— and where are you heading to...? Did you lost your home?” He pries, looking carefully at the boy.

“I’m going to Trost with my mom.” He wonders, “what about you?”

“We have nowhere to go to. We... lost our home.”

“I’m... sorry. But at least the three of you are together... I can’t say the same about my friends.” A somber look passes his face, a pain crossing his chest.

“You lost them.” The blond girl says, avoiding looking at him. They visually cringe at the revelation.

“I haven’t find them yet.” He tried to have faith. [Name] didn't want to believe he lost them.

“So you are not sure...?” The brunette pries, a little shy.

“I hope not. I... I have hope, if that helps.”

“W–What do you plan to do next?”

[Name] tilts his head, looking at the floor as he thought about before. His rage didn’t fade off— he was sure he would enlist in the military as soon as he could. There was no going back. “I’m enlisting.”

“Enlisting? To the military?” The girl spoke, raising a brow. [Name] nods. “For what?”

The stoic boy answers instantly, “to explore what’s behind these walls.”

“Why? Weren’t you there when the wall broke?”

“And?”

“And? You saw the titans! Aren’t you scared?!” This time the blond interfered, a look of shock plastered on his face.

“So being scared means I won’t do nothing?” He crosses his arms. “My home is lost— I can’t let it be just some memories.”

The children see him in amazement, well— only the two boys. The girl is wearing her usual frown, still looking at his eyes. “So you will enlist when you’re old enough?”

“Yeah," he blinks, "what about you?”

“We don’t know yet.” The blonde says hurriedly.

“[Name]!” The boy could hear Beatrice calling for him, making him turn around.

“What?”

“Mom’s calling for me.” He turns to see them, “I have to go now.”

“Well then, hope we can see each other again.” The blond boy tries to smile at him, receiving a nod from the expressionless kid.

Before leaving, [Name] looks at the brunette in the eyes, softening his gaze a little. The taller kid gulps unsure of what to say or do, and chooses not to say anything and just wait.

“Your eyes are pretty.” The sudden compliments makes the brunette blush— but he couldn’t say anything as the kid was walking away already. The three children stay put, looking at the unusual boy leaving with hurry. What a strange meeting... and rather lucky one.

“One thing to care less about.” The girl speaks, crossing her arms as her eyes follow the kid.

The children walk away. The blond boy frowning, the brunette still blushing and the girl looking behind her.

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

“Good news! There’s a boat going exactly at Trost just now. They are making people get on already, so let’s hurry!” She took his hand and walked hurriedly to the boats’ direction. "If we get on right now we can arrive in one hour!"

[Name] noticed she looked rather happy. She was smiling— maybe to calm him. What happened was traumatic, even if they didn't have to face the titans like other people did. Even seeing them from afar was scary... [Name] wondered how Eren, Mikasa and Armin managed. If he had accepted that lunch invitation, what would have happen to him? Would he be with them right now? Maybe he could have helped them if he noticed sooner...

Ẁ̴̡̞̝͚̲͎̲̬̩̖̺̥͊̋̅̈́̏̊̅̆̽́̌ḧ̷̡̧̳̗̣̱̜̺͇̺͍́͆̃̓̽̈́͑̿̆̃͝͠͠a̷̛͓̒̔̎̎̋̆̃̚͝ẗ̵̛̙̻̖́͒̈̍̈́͑̀͂̋͘͝ ̴̗̟̠̪̮̬̪̦͙͖̯̝̊̓̾̅̈́̾̅̓̽̆̾̈̚h̷̼͉̿̽̿͒͊̀͛̊ȩ̸̢̢͎͚̝͓̞̘̬̩̭̭̍͐̈́̑̽̂̋͂l̴̢̢͕̩̰̝̜̲͑́̈́̎̈́̓̅͐̀͜͝ͅp̴̖̐͌̀̿̋͊̔̚͠ ̷̨̧̘̠̼̹̼̰̪̯̯̻̳̓̈͗̊̈́̂̽͑͑̑̽̈̒͠͠c̵̲̜̙̻̳̰͇̦̺̪̼̰̥̊̒ȯ̶̼͕͇̲̫̤̞̪͊͗̏̑̐͑̈́̔̊̅͆͜ư̷̡̩̳̝̼̦̯̬̹̯̮̥̼͂̍̚͝l̷̨̟̠̖̟͎̀̋͂͗̉̔̇͑͌͘͠d̷̨̤̺͚̬͚͉̿͝ ̸̺̟̺͔̟̭̣͔̠̯̪͆͜y̷͖̍̉̑͂̚o̵̧̢͔̖͔͍͈͖̫̯͙͍̪͚͑̋̎̋͋͑̀̈́͆̇̚͝͝͝ű̵̧̲͇̺͔̅̉̋͠ ̸͇̜̠͎̗̣̰͔̼̳͇͛̅h̸͍͉̞͇͑͊̊̍̾̚͝͝a̷̡̩͙͖̻̹̗͎̟͙̼̙̪̰͗͌͒͐v̴̛̭̦̙̟̣̯͙̹̈́̍͐͆̇̎̇̃̏̕͝͝͠ȩ̵̝̦̌͒̔̆̓̑͜ ̷͎̿̿̎̓͘b̸͖̟͉̥̤̼̻̫̝̻̈́̃͆͒̽͌̔͝͝r̷̡̨̠͙͚̰̗̙̪͉̋̆̑̊̓̒͒̏͊̏̄͜i̶̢͔̼̲̻̞̞̝̦̫͈̩̔́͂ņ̷͎̜̬̻̳́̇̿̚g̵̡͖̘̝̟̗̼͇͑́̋͌̏́̃̉̕͘è̸̢̺̣̹̤̰̭̩̱̮͑̄̍͑̀̓̚͠d̸̡̡͇̥̝͋́̅͒̍̐?̸̮͙̏́̾́̈́̓̇̓͑ͅ ̶̧̖̝͉͉̈́Ÿ̵̨͇͙̥͚̰͎͔͖̰̭̺̗̭́̀͊̆̒̎̓̑̈́̕ǫ̴̛͓̻̘̞͙̪̱̜͙̝̜̠̅̈́͝͠u̶̡̢̧̲̜̱̮͚̣̥̳̞̓͛ ̴̛͙̹̹͈͇̆̊͑̀̍̊̄̄͛̕a̴͚̰͙͚̯͉̝̭̤͋̓̎͊͒̐̌̿͛͝r̶̢̛͕͕̳̺͍͈̗̟̫̓̓̓͂̌͆̀̚͘ͅę̵̧͍̪͈͚͕̟̞͓͑̃̀͐͗̍̄͜͝ ̸̢̳̹̼͖͓̙̳̯̭͔͋͐̇̏͌̉̌͒̊̊͂͋͊̚͜ͅj̸̧͙̥̰̳̊͂̄̇̏̈ų̸̧͙͔͕̬̺̱̱̯̬̤̳͑͆̅̌̉̓̚͘͜ŝ̶̩͎͓͎̾̈́͌́̐̈́̎̉̄̈̓͘͝ţ̸̭͖̥̜̦͔̼̼̾̎͗̿̈́̓̎͐̚͜͝ ̶̢̜̯̰͉̟̝͈̲̜̙͕̋͗̿̇̚̚͠a̶̛͙̯̬̘̗͈͉͕͈̖̽̌͑͛̈́͑͒̓̍́͝͝ ̴̧̨͉̜̖̖̅̾͒̈́͊͗̃͑̓͘͝u̴̢̜̝̼̞̼̠̠͖̩̫͒̆̓͂s̷̛͙͉̈́͗̈̐̎͝ě̸͇̫̪̰͕̺̝̗̤̖̜͊ͅl̶̢̢͓͖̖̰̘̦̭̦̝̫̒̽͐̿̕͜͜͜ẽ̷̢̧͈̤̟̟̬̱̯̝̩̑̽̂̑̇͂͛̋̑͑̚͜͠͠ͅs̸͎̳̮̽ş̷̛̹̰̪̣̖̭̬̠̃͂͐̀̂͜͝ ̷̡͍̗̬̪͒̽͌b̷̢̛̘͇͎̠͓̝͇͕̱̠̻̹̗͍͂̎̋̋͋̐o̷̱̖̯͊͗͐̔̄͗̈́̈́̋̽̌̏͠y̷̧͙͖̣̞͕̲̌̆̃̾̅̃ ̶̨̬̜͖͔̖̰̗̉̆͐̈́̃͋͑̒̅̈́̑ř̷̡̬͕̬̗̄͒̃̇̀̚i̶̧̛̮̳̺̖͖̻͉͎͉͈̟̩͚̍̋̉ͅg̴͉̻̓͌̆͑h̸̙̺̝̦͖̎̄̔̉̈́̅̈͗̿̃́̅͝t̵̢̼̺̦̙̗̣̪̥̯̄͐͂̂̏͘͜ ̴̨̧̳̗͓̹̖̱̟̏̔͒̽̅n̸͕̟̕o̵͓͇̗̭̦̗̼̻͈͗̓̿̃ͅw̵̮͙̜͛̇̎̐̇̑͂̈́͘̕.̶̧̘̬͈̈̀̈́ͅ

He flinched, pressing his palm against his forehead. Gritting his teeth, the boy tried to not let go any sound— what was with this headaches now? They weren't that usual in the same day. Something was wrong with him; maybe what happened had affected him more than he thought? If so, his future managing this headaches didn't look bright. The only thing that was left with him was the herbs and the was he could bear with the pain.

"Well, there are people around..." Beatrice looked around, spotting the Trost's boat. There were soldiers shouting the boat's destination, making it easy to spot it. Both of them walked where they were, along with some other families that were already waiting the others to get on. They arrived just in time, it seemed. Beatrice sighed in relief, turning to [Name], who hided his painful headache with his stoic expression. "In Trost we go. Don't worry honey, I'm sure Lydia can take us in."

"And if she can't?"

Beatrice doesn't falters nor her smiles fades, "then, like I said before, we'll manage. Together, okay?" She squeezes his hand gently. [Name] doesn't answer verbally, rather, he sighs and shows a smile as he squeezes back. He's glad Beatrice is okay— if not, he would have been all alone by himself. Maybe he would even be back at Shinganshina, lost, not knowing what to do. When he find her, something heavy disappeared on his shoulders.

Beatrice talks all the time they are waiting to get on the boat, talking about how Trost is a good place to live. She says her pastries could charm the people from them if she plays her cards right. [Name] believes she doesn't have to play anything to love her as he does— someone nice as her is noticed by miles. If they don't like her or her pastries, is because they are dumb.

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

Beatrice was right —like she always is—, they arrived to the district in one hour. The boat was just tight— seems there were other people who had business in the same city. Once they got off, they stretched. They were awfully tired— if this 'Lydia' Beatrice talked wonders about didn't take them in, the would have to sleep on the streets because their energy was disappearing. Quickly after their little 'exercise', they got a move on. It was more tiring, because Beatrice didn't exactly know where her friend lived no more, and asking to person to person was taking all of their day.

Luckily an old woman who sold fruits knew exactly who she was talking about. The nice lady told them where Lydia lived with her son, and it wasn't far away from there.

"Yes! You have to turn left when you are at Jimmy's bar, then you will see her house. It has an orange door, so you can't mistake it."

"Thank you so much! I don't have anything with me to thank you now, but—"

"Oh, hush! You don't have to worry about it," the lady chuckled, taking two apples from her baskets and handed them to Beatrice, who blushed and shacked her head, "don't worry about it, dear! Take them! I can see your lovely son is hungry, and I'm sure you are too. So please take them."

Beatrice sighed and smiled, grateful for the help she got. "I'm very thankful, ma'am." She took the apples, handing one to [Name] who took immediately and began to ate it.

"Thank you, ma'am."

"Oh, what a handsome boy!" She laughed, "you two seem tired. Only god knows what you two went trough. I won't take your time anymore, so please hurry and rest."

Beatrice thanked her again before leaving, retaking their little 'mission' to find Lydia's house. "Everything will be alright," she spoke more to herself as he took a bite on the apple, looking ahead, hand in hand with [Name]. The boy looked at her with his tired eyes, squeezing her hand.

It only took a few minutes to spot the bar the lady talked about, and after they took the turn they spotted quickly the orange door. Beatrice sighed in relief before approaching it, knocking on it three times. [Name] realized his mom was nervous, seeing her tensed shoulders and pressed lips.

"Everything will be alright," he gently spoke, smiling. Beatrice looked at him in surprise, blinking. She smiled soon after, patting his head.

The door opened— both of them changed their attention to it. A chubby woman with brown tied hair looked at them in confusion, but before Beatrice could speak why or who they were, the woman's eyes widened and a "oh my!" left her lips, quickly after hugging Beatrice with happiness in her actions.

"Beatrice! It's been so long since I last saw you!"

"I'm happy you remember me, Lydia." Beatrice smiled, returning the hug.

Lydia's expression changes into a worried one, "I heard what happened in Shinganshina! Are you alright?!"

"Uh, well— as you heard what happen, I wanted to ask you—"

"You don't even have to ask, woman! You can stay here as long as you want to!"

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

"This is my son, Jean! Say hi to [Name], Jeanbo." Jean's mom happily said, taking a step on the right to give Jean some space.

Behind her was a boy taller than [Name]. His hair color had two tones, by [Name]'s surprise. It looks good on him. He had a frown on his face, and even if he looked irritated, maybe he was just shy.

"Don't call me that..." He said in irritation, before looking at the [hair color] haired boy with a blush on his cheeks. He grabbed his wrist, a little shy. "Hello." He only greeted.

Showing a small smile, [Name] tried to sound friendly and not that expressionless, not knowing if he succeeded. "Hello. Is nice to meet you, Jean."

Jean, blinking, said, "yeah, uh, nice to meet you too..."

"Beatrice and [Name] will stay with us for some time, so please be kind with them, alright?" She spoke to her child softly, and he only blinked in surprise and nodded in return. [Name] didn't know if he minded some strangers stayed at his house, but it seemed Lydia didn't. "Okay then, why don't you show [Name] your room? He will sleep with you just for some weeks before we settle this, okay?"

"My room?!"

"Jeanbo! Don't be disrespectful in front of our guests!"

"B—But—!"

"Jean."

The boy sighed, nodding. He guided [Name] where his room was, which was upstairs.

"I'm sorry if I'm causing you trouble..." Beatrice said, looking embarrassed.

"Don't be! Jeabo is just difficult, but he doesn't mind," Lydia waits until she sees the boys leave, then turns to Beatrice, "now, I can see you are both hungry AND tired! Let me make something for you. It's almost night."

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

The small walk to Jean's room was quick and filled with awkward silence. [Name] —who is not good at all at social stuff—, didn't feel particularly uncomfortable, just tired. Maybe he could sleep a little if he was allowed to?

"Sorry you have to share," [Name] spoke, taking Jean's attention, "I can sleep on the floor if you want."

The other boy blushed for some reason and averted looking at [Name], "I-It's alright. We can sleep t-together." Hearing that made [Name] relieved— he didn't want to sleep on the floor tonight. He was so tired, mentally and physically. Maybe he could even sleep one full week.

"Here's my room..." Jean opened the door, letting [Name] in. The amnesiac boy at the sight of the bed almost falls, and without thinking much he asked, looking at Jean with tired eyes,

"Can I sleep?" Jean's eyes widened, blinking. He just nodded slowly, seeing [Name] walk tiredly at the bed and drop himself on it.

Jean waited for a reaction, but there was none. "Did he fell asleep already?!" Jean approached the boy, getting near his sleepy face. When he heard the small snores coming out of his mouth he was sure the other fell asleep instantly— Jean didn't know that was possible until now.

Now that he was ‘alone’, Jean could pay attention of his new roommates’ appearance. Not that he didn’t... appreciate it when he first saw him, but now he could carefully see him. Even if his characteristics weren’t out of the ordinary, he looked different. But what looked obviously different was his eyes. Jean didn’t looked at them that much at first, but when he looked at him to ask if he could sleep Jean had the opportunity to see them.

They were... cool.

Jean blinked, realizing how weird he was being by watching carefully the other boy. Blushing, he covered his face with his hand before quietly walking towards the door to leave, not without glazing one last time at [Name], seeing his sleepy face.

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

"Oh, where's [Name]?" Lydia asks, noticing the absence of the other boy.

"He fell asleep."

"He must have been so tired... my poor boy..." Beatrice sighs.

"Uhm—" Jean speaks, trying to let his question out. Beatrice, noticing it, looks at him with curiosity.

"Hmn? Is something you want to ask me?" She smiles kindly, stopping her actions while Lydia cuts some vegetables.

"Well... [Name]'s eyes are... different," he shakes his head, "n-not that is a bad thing or anything!"

Beatrice chuckles, "indeed they are, hmn?" Jean nods, shyly looking at her, "I think he was born with them... I've seen them since I first saw him."

"Oh? [Name] isn't your son?" This time Lydia pries, looking at Beatrice who shakes her head as an answer.

"I found him, or rather, he found me." She smiles as she remembers how scared and lost he looked before— like a frightened kitten. "Jean, [Name] isn't a bad boy by any means. He's... quiet and a little anti-social, so please be patient with him, yeah?"

Jean just looks at her with widened eyes before nodding. He couldn't deny he was interested in him— after all, it wasn't everyday he made some friends, even if he tried to don't make it obvious. And [Name] looked interesting.

"Finally you will have a friend, Jeanbo!" His mother chuckled, finishing making dinner. The boy grunted.

"I have friends! Y-You just haven't seen them...!"

"Sure thing, my boy..."

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

[Name] didn't wake up until the next morning. And even so, Beatrice had to wake him up because Jean couldn't. The woman seemed she was get used to such sleeping problems, because she dealt with it fast.

"Here," Jean hands [Name] some clothes, "we will share clothes. I will show you the shower." [Name], still sleepy, yawns and nods, doing his best to walk straight. Jean gazes at him a few times, ready to catch him if he falls. Luckily that doesn't happen.

"Uhm, breakfast will be ready when you finish, so... go there...?" He awkwardly speaks, receiving a nod from [Name]. Jean is ready to leave, until his low but gentle voice speaks,

"Thank you," and then closes the door, leaving Jean alone. The boy looks at the wooden door for a couple of seconds before leaving to breakfast.

Lydia tells Jean to go to the bakery to accompany some bread to today's breakfast, but says to wait for [Name] so they can go together. Jean waits on his seat, until [Name] comes.

━━━━━━✧♛✧━━━━━━

"Uh... let's go then," Jean says, looking at [Name] who yawns and follows him not before waving at Beatrice and Lydia, who wave back in return with a smile. Jean awkwardly does it too before closing the door.

Jean didn't want to ask, but his curiosity was growing on him. He knew [Name] was in Shinganshina when all of the titans came in and broke the wall... and the titans, such monsters that Jean have never saw and couldn't imagine, wanted to know everything [Name] saw. Was there really a titan as big as the walls? How did it looked like?

It seemed he was trying to keep his mouth shut, as [Name] saw how his mouth opened but closed a couple of times. [Name] knew exactly the other wanted to ask— and if he was honest, he wanted to forget about it.

"Just ask." He spoke rather loudly, irritated by the other's actions. Jean jumped at hearing his voice, blushing in embarrassment. He took a couple of seconds before asking,

"Is that true? A titan bigger than the wall?"

[Name] remembers it— skinless monster, moving its eyes trough the people, meeting his'. It's hand gripping the wall, rupturing it. "Barely."

Jean is surprised, but can't hold his questions anymore, "how are they? are they really that big? how many were there?"

Titans who smile for an unknown reason, who eat humans for a reason not known, "they are big, and they smile a lot..." He shivers remembering them, and even if he didn't see them close, their smiles burn his mind.

"Smile...?"

"Yeah."

Jean catches [Name]'s tone and stops prying. Luckily the awkward silence didn't last long, as the two boys arrive to the bakery, instantly smelling the bread. [Name] relax, remembering the times where Beatrice and he bake in her kitchen. Jean does most of the task, seeing as [Name] is not that great socializing. He only says a low hello to the baker, and when Jean takes their stuff the leave.

"Sorry If I pried to much... I was curious."

"It's alright."

"Ahh— but isn't it Jeanbo?" A mocking tone of voice that [Name] recognizes too well is heard behind them, making them turn to see who is it. Jean know exactly who, seeing his frown as he turns around. "And with a new friend I see!" The other boys behind him laugh.

Jean is in silence, and [Name] can't help but assume what is happening. He knows it too well— since Armin was bullied a lot, he knew exactly what type of people this kids were.

And he wouldn't stand for that.

"Aaaah! Look at his eyes! So freaky!" One of them gets near [Name]'s face, making the boy frown in disgust. "What?? You don't talk?"

"Leave us alone."

The bully takes Jean by his shirt, smiling disgustingly at him, "what? momma's boy has grown some balls now that your little friend is here?" Jean shut his mouth, trying to get out of the other's grasps but failing to do so. "Yeah, that's what I thought, momma's boy!" The bully lets out a laugh, following by his friends. But the bully sees what is Jean holding in his hand, grinning, he steals it from Jean's grasp, "ah! you have bread with you. How nice of you, Jeanbo! Now, let me take it—"

"You won't take anything." [Name] speaks, looking straight at the bully's eyes who looks surprised at him, but quickly changes his expression to his clown face.

"Ah? The mute can talk?" He says as he drops Jean, approaching [Name] to intimidate him. He is taller than him, but to [Name] it doesn't mean anything. "Look, I will explain you how things works here, you see—"

"Shut your filthy mouth. You are annoying." [Name] spat out, helping Jean stand up, who looks already frightened by what is about to happen.

"How dare you—!" One of the bully's friends say, but the leader stops him with his arm.

"Now, now, we have to teach him a lesson, don't we, boys?" The boys laugh devilish, nodding as they stretch and move their fists. "Now, why don't you cooperate and—" before he could continue his banter, a punch straight to the face shut him off, surprising his friends and Jean by the sudden force that made him fall. There's silence for a moment, but the bully, embarrassingly covering his bloody nose, yells, "what are you waiting for, idiots?! Get him!"

The two boys react and approach [Name] to give a punch, but the by easily dodges their attacks by kneeling and lifting his leg to kick one of them with full force, making one fall on top of the other. It seems he knocked-out the one of top, seeing he got unresponsive, as the one under him tried to move.

Jean thought this would be over seeing the fight ending quickly, noticing how people are surrounding them.

But [Name] wasn't done— he slowly approached the leader, who looked terrified as he tried to back off still on the floor. The amnesiac boy harshly took him by the collar, looking at him with deadly and frightening eyes, "you should give me that," he points with his head the bag of bread.

"Y-Yeah, all yours!" He quickly speaks, handing him the bag. But just as [Name] takes it, the bully's expression turns into a big grin, taking [Name]'s wrist to make him fall. "Hahaha! You thought you will—" An elbow to the face knocks him off, silencing him for good. [Name] drops to the floor without much harm, taking the bag and with Jean's help he stand up. He dusts himself without much thought before giving Jean the bread.

"T-That was... amazing!" Jean can't stop his surprise and the nice feeling of someone standing up for him. He admires the stoic boy, who doesn't look tired, dusting himself as if nothing had happened. He looks at Jean, tilting his head with a small frown.

"We should get going for breakfast." He began walking, but seeing as Jean wasn't following, he stopped and looked behind him with a raised brow. His humming made Jean's thought snap and run towards him with a blush, the two boys walking to their home as they talk all the way there.

Jean didn't want to admit it, but [Name] was pretty cool, even if he was a little weird. He looked forward to being his friend in the future... He didn't mind sharing his bed with him if it meant hearing him talk more.

Trough the walk to their home, [Name] hides his headache, more exactly trying to ignore the static that he hears.

Ḧ̴̻̩̘̰͖̯̫̼̼̼̮̤̼̭̩͉̟́̄̓̓́̍̕͘͝ͅe̵̡̨̡̢͓̜̻̻͇͚̖͂̾̐͑͌͛̃̃͂͘͝͝͝ͅ ̶̢̬̼̱͈̬͍̣͍̖̟͉̫͚͇̈́̀͊͋̊̅̾͂͗̈́̌̑̚̚â̸͇͚̩̰̊̎̿̍̐́̈́͘͘͝͠ͅľ̷̛͚̦̖͗̋̇͗͋́͝r̶̢̛̲̞͎͕̜͈̬̹ͅe̵͉͕̦͈͈̞̝͙͈̠͉̹̟̗͓̊̑͗̾͐͘͘͜͜͝â̵̢̤̟̭͕͍̥͈̥̈́̌͐̾̐͊̆͆͐́̒̑͐̌̚̚͠͠ḏ̵͔̫̻̪͔͖̮͓̮͎̋̾̉͊̔̉̐̌͗͂̒͌̍̿͘͝ͅÿ̵̢̬̙́̐̃͐͋̐̾̈́̍̋̇̀͊̈́̐̋̚͝ͅ ̸͈̘͔̯̩͐̑̔̿̃͋̆̅̒͌͌̍͝͝h̷̖̟̉̌̓̅̎̉̎̌̚a̶̱̼̙̮̥͕̥͔͈̽̍̅̊̈̏̂̂̍̕͝s̸̜̮͐̓̈́ ̷̳̫̳̙͒͋̽̃̈́̈́̏̈́̈̎͂͛͝͠ţ̵̲̩̣̠̲̝͙̜̻̣̲̀̿̃̿͆̆͆h̶̩̞̠̭̳̼͇̠̝̗̻̼̮̙̞̹̤̑̈́̂̒̓̇̔̔̈́̏͌̋͝͝͝e̵̡̮̙̺̯͇͚͕͕̫͛̊̅͂̆ͅį̸̹̞̱͍̫̥͓̻̫̈́̽̏͋̃̇̋͆͑̄͒̓́̔̒̚̕r̷͕̙̖͓̩̃͒̎͂͒̓̃̕̕͘͝ ̶̛͈̜̰̗͈̭̬̥͈̳͚̼͖̙̏͗̏̎̔̏̅̌̚͜͜͝p̵̨̡̖̰͈̬̮̗͓̘̂̐̒̂̈́̊ơ̴̧̡̨̧̙̟̯̞̻̪͉͕̫̝͎̜͗̄̈̊͆̊̓ͅw̵̡̡̡̺̬̹͇̠͓̟̘̹̱̺̾͐ͅẹ̶̼̦̜͙̹͎̥͌͆̓r̶̞͔̯̪͖͖͖̝̜̜̯̰̙̈́̌̐̑.̵̡͉̫̠͎̩̦̗̣̝̝̪̙̽̈́̓̄̚̕ ̸̛̛̫̘̲̓̈́̌̈́̓͑͒̀͘͝G̴̡͙̯͖̥͙̼͕̳̜̬̺̬͕̱̭͕̐͌̍̀̑͛̓̔̾͗̒̉́̇͑̔̚ǫ̷̬͚̝̭͚̳̠͙̺̖̞̭͖̉̍͑̊̈́̇̿̋͆̂͌̊͌̀̔̈́̚ͅọ̵̎̊̌̈̌̏͌̑͂̐̕͝͝d̸̬͙͆̽̊̔̋͒͐͝ ̸̧͈͓̱̗̂̄̃̇͊̒̅̏̀͊̚t̶̡͇̭̣̫̣̹͙̤̬̥̗̑̊͠͠h̷̬̬̙̣̙̭͚̦̝̦͇̻͖̹͂̅̄̓̈́͊̆̈͐̄͊͜͠͝͝ỉ̴̛͍͙͔̬̹̬̞̄̈́͐̅͒̌́̿̐̊͐̕͜ͅn̶̡̝̱̘̯̼̳̝̬͙̰̻̦̳̈͒̾͂͌͆̿̐̈́̈͠g̶̢̜̬̫̰̯̖̹̩̤͊̇̈́̓̓͂̓̐̚ͅ ̷̨̛̩͙̹̻̩̣̦̬͇̤̥̼̓̋̄͒̈̄h̴̩̲̠̥̳̹͇̮͇͕͔̝̤͗̓͗̈́͘ͅͅȩ̸̨̻͇̫̥̩̪̟͈̩̼̘̒̆͌̆̕͜͜'̷̨̡̡͇͍͖͈͎̣͈̞͙̼̖̠̲̭͖̳͛͋̎̂̾̆̅͒͘s̶̪͙̭͔̋͛͑̐͛͝ ̶̲̄̈́̈͂̽͒͋͗̊͑̂̈̈́̚̚͝͠ņ̴̡̥̦͇̗͕̖̜͖̞̒͋̑̇̌̾̈͗͝ŏ̸̤̈́̾͋ț̷̠͓̲̹̻͔̙̻͍͎̮̾̎̈́̂̅̉͌̓̋̒͐̊̌̽̿̑̚ ̷̨̢̤̲̥̹̰̼̗̰͍̮͖̥̺̠̾͂͗͂̓̑̑̔̎͛͗̿̉̚͘ͅa̵͎̫̳̲̙̤̟̦̺̗̣̞͉͉͒̇͊̍̎͂̍͛ͅ ̸͚͈͉̱͇̦̜̣͉̗̎̇̒ͅͅģ̸̦̱̠̣͔̼͉͗̉̒̈̓̃̾͝ơ̶̢̧̹̯̳̬̱̭͇̣̖͊̆͂͊͑͋͑͑̚̚͠͝͝o̶̧̬̹͈͎̯͈̼̰̫̲̣̜̥̊̀̔́̔̇͑͆͝͝ͅͅd̷̢͎̰̖͚͉͙̼͓̮̗̬̦̱͔͊̍̉̿̈̌̂̄̐̒̿̚ ̷̢̧̼̹̏͐̄̀͑̏̉͊̊͝ͅf̸̧̧̺͔͉͙̮͈͕̭̜͈̰̗̎͐̑̈́͑̀́̌͝ö̸̢̨͍̥̞̮̹̫̹͓̞̱̟͓̳̳͙́̎̽̿̑̀͆̾͝ͅͅr̶͇͍̱͚͖͚͑̓̈̋̌̌́̃͆͌͋ ̸̢͔̙̻̼̼̦̞̲̫̗͓̝̦̒͗̚ń̷̨͕̟̲̦̬͉͖̘̜̺̱̭̖͖͈́̋ͅơ̷̙͚͕̰̼͕̙̞̠̥͚̠͆̂͌̋͑̚͠ţ̸̠̜͔̭͐̓͋͛̾̽̊̓̓ḩ̵̧͍͕̙̱͈͈̤̑̔͜i̸̢̢̮͇̤̘̞̥͋̅̑̀̂̈́n̶͎͙̎̄̿̚g̷̢̻̩̟̳̲̩̫̝̮̤̞͈͎̹͈͗͂͜.̴̡̖̬͇̬̫̰͙̺̖̇͐̒̿́̎̔̈́̇̊̃̆̔́̉̾̕͠.̶̢̧̧͍̭̩̤̝̪̰̤̱̹͖̰͙̹̀͑͛̉͜͜͝.̵̳̲̦̼̞͚̅̿̈ͅ

NOTES i'm taking some canon-liberties rn, like * how can the warrior trio get to the refugees before eren and the others? * [name] nor beatrice saw the armored titan because their ship had already sailed * tbh, jean's ma doesnt have a name anywhere, so i named her to write more easily i hope you don't get too much annoyed by that hehehe

I wanted to just say thank you. I was one of the many peeps that was reading the plagiarized story about Jean Kirsten x reader called Unexpected. That was ripped from the Kylo x rei fic. I had wondered why the tumblr posting just vanished. Oof I feel bad. I was reading the fic and liked it. I will admit I thought it was odd that some names were different what they were but I being human gave them the benefit of the doubt, to placeholder names. But now I’m just kind of mad at myself I shouldn’t have assumed, I honestly feel bad, but thank you and anon for being honest and posting about it.

its totally understandable why you feel like that, but you shouldn’t, neither one of us knew what the person behind that blog was doing. I do recommend to read the original if you liked the story, it is amazing and its better to give likes and kudos to the real author than feeling bad about something you didn’t know!

In love with this man is a statement.

back with the jean posts for you guys

the fic series "unexpected" by @battoddster is plagiarized from ao3 user @pontmercy44's fic written in 2017. the fic is completely copied and pasted as some names weren't even replaced. just thought you should know.

Thank you so much for telling me. They deactivatwd their blog so there is not much I can do, but the fact that there were people who really found comfort in the fic really pisses me off, as someone who wrote little fics I can’t really imagine how it must feel that your work is being plagiarized.

Proof: https://reylofic.tumblr.com/post/176290735471/hi-can-you-help-me-find-a-reylo-fic-about-pregnant

 Hey gurll, I've always wanted a match up and here I am 😭🙏🏻💖 thank you so much for this and feel free to ignore this if your not comfortable with my ask!!!!💞

I'm Mey, pronouns she/her, 18y.o. I'm an infp, Taurus to the core! I like to camouflage myself in the crowd and absolute avoid center of attention but well, it finds me:) I would say I'm pretty friendly and awkward at first, but as you get to know me my goofier side comes out. I'm pretty selfless and selfish at the same time, I feel like I'm always there for people to give them a shoulder but when it's my turn there's nobody. I'm selfish in the sense id put myself FIRST! no way anyone else comin der. Not Matter what. My peace of mind comes first before anyone. I bake and I'm an artist, love to relieve stress and pressure thru sketching or painting (maybe that's why I'm so good at it :-)) I don't like when people are disrespectful, hate loud people in the morning, I'm sorry but I don't like any carbonated drinks idk why ;_; and I absolutely don't like people who love to brage in any way. I hate talking about the shit I'm going thru, and I always like to give this 'im absolutely okay' vibe, maybe cuz I don't want them to see my weak side. It's hard for me to open up. But I always have an ear to listen to you. Well I'm 5'7, short brown hair and eyes (I got crazy long thighs 😭) , chubby cheeks and round face. Gender preference male (aot, haikyuu), I like someone who's respectful, can make me laugh and is goofy, cute. AND I'm pretty(I mean a lot) clingy and I'm always down for cuddling and hugs and the physical touch. Not in public tho, maybe a lil>.< Genre preference fluff/smut (*・x・)/ And that's about it! Tysm and have an amazing day! 💖

I match you with...

¡! Jean Kirstein ¡!

Why?

hear me out, you are like 'not hating but kinda there to lovers trope'. you found out you had more similarities than differences, and that he is actually a super cute guy. Your relationship is based in communication and affection.

general headcanons:

¡! SFW ¡!

you were best friends with Sasha and were applying for the corps. There you met Jean and company, he wasn't much of your taste because of how obnoxious he could get, always bragging about his abilities.

with time you got to know him better and why was he like that. the reason was a crush with Mikasa and his jealousy for Eren, he wasn't like that really, just wanted to be noticed by the one he cared for.

two years had passed since you had joined the survey corps, and Jean was a bit quiet? something was off from him, you didn't pay much attention to it.

Jean understood that Mikasa wasn't interested in him and stopped trying to persuade her, his rivalry with Eren didn't stop but was much more controled. He was more mature.

a sudden interest came from you, now, one of the closest friends of Sasha was kinda attractive and that mullet of his was certainly points extra.

You started talking cuasually, some "hey"s and "how are you"s were traded between a sudden interest came from you, Jean being his flirty self did started to show off trying to get your attention but a simple "stop that, I like you being yourself" made him realize that it was too overwhelming.

now you were like 'everybody knows they like each other except themselves trope'. even Eren was routing for you.

actually, it was Eren who encouraged Jean to confess. Jean told you he liked you with a bunch of flowers he found in the forest. they turned out to be purple tulips and red carnation.

Jean since day one established that communication to him was very important and that he would be there anytime you needed something.

he respects your boundaries.

he would try to put you first, does care if you do the same but understands your beliefs.

comforts you the best he can, long hugs, forhead kisses, tender caresses and some advice if you ask for them.

lots of girls want him but he is loyal to the core, would never cheat on you

will cuddle till death, he is a loveball

he would prefer you to be a bit clingy in public but not to the point of making uncomfortable other people

will pepper your face with kisses all the time

his morning voice is like angel's singing, god praise and value that raspy tone 😤

loves to draw you, he gifts you only the best ones tho, mostly are just doodles of you two doing shenanigans

loves seeing your work and is always intrigued in your artistic process

"babe can I hang this in my room?"

cooks delicious but bakes horrendous, please do him cupcakes, he loves them

will tickle you in the morning to get you up for duty

he has a lot of sarcastic comments, most of them are bad, but you end up laughing because of how bad they are

pet names he will use are babe, bubs, baby, darling, sweetie, and only for soecial ocassions honey

likes to grab you by the waist

cooking dates! or more like those cliché romatic dates where he cooks dinner along with candles, rose petals and old music in the background

very cheesy but puts a lot of effort in it, and the food is 10/10 and the night surprise too 😩🙏🏼

the world he lives in is very curel and horrible, you made it shine and for that he will always have a space in his heart for you <3

¡! NSFW ¡!

he is a thighs man

so when he first saw you so vulnerable he went crazy

your bare core oh so inviting to him

his fingers work wonders and his tongue too

loves to spank you

you + riding him = him in heaven

when he cums he moans

he gets addicted to your taste so expect him eating you out everytime he can

loves to be teased in public, his girl trying to turn him on with lots of people around huh, he's in

one of his fav positions is doggy because he can be deeper in you and gets to grab your ass and thighs

bondage

please overstimulate him while he's tied up

cries when he gets to much stimulation, he likes it but will never admit it

blowjobs are a must too

his cum is thick and tastes quite good ngl, not salty, just perfect

he has big thighs too

sensitive in his lower stomach

his abs 😩😩😩😩

lick his nipples, trust me

he's big in general, his dick is not the exception

around 7 in, pink when he gets horny, trimmed, and some veins on the side

a lot of cuddle sex

degrade him when you are riding him. like PLEASE DO IT.

[purple tulips: loyalty] [red carnation: pure love] [dandelions: hope and happiness]

¡! song recommendation ¡!

he would put this song to dance with you 😭💖