Edward Kenway - Blog Posts

Guess who sits where 😉

Don't mind me. I'm just cooking with Inkarnate

Random thoughts with

Jacob Frye pt.2

The whole family was watching an action car movie (it's all about family). Everyone sat in the living room together, some on the couch and some on the floor, Jacob sat next to Evie by the armrest of the couch as the movie went on with out any issues, it was then that Jacob, thought of the most random thoughts ever.

Desmond: *eating popcorn*

Jacob: . . . Popcorn is just explosions frozen in time for you to eat.

Desmond: *stops eating his popcorn*

...

Everyone: ...

Evie: *hard sighs* brother... pls...

Altair: *clenched teeth* ... not... today... Frye...

Ezio: is this what I missed when I wasn't at the dinner table last week?

Shaun: lucky you, yes. Not so lucky now though...

Jacob: Did you know, dinosaurs were more closely related to birds... so... since our creed's mascot is an eagle-

Malik: don't you dare Jacob-

Jacob: and if we were all from the prehistoric times-

Desmond: Jacob-

Jacob: *smug grin* Doesn't that make us-

Evie: Jacob I swear to god don't-

Jacob: Dinosaurs Creed! *wheezes*

Edward: HAHA!!! *wheezes* yes! That is exactly what we are!

Altair: no! No, we are not!

Leonardo: ... again, he's technically not wrong.

Shaun: Leonardo, listen we love you, but pls... don't encourage this any further.

Jacob: oh no it's far too late for that Shaun!

Claudia: can't we just watch this movie in peace, please Jacob...

Maria: *rubbing her head in irritation* yes pls, Jacob I rather not get a headache this late in the day.

Jacob: ... Dinosaurs are just pokemon with weaker evolutions.

Achilles: pls! Frye, just zip your mouth for more than five minutes for once in your life!

Jacob: fine! ok! ok!

Edward: Aw, you all are no fun...

Desmond: thank you, Jacob.

5 minutes later. The family seems to go back to relaxing and watching the movie, they are at a car chase scene.

Jacob: ... *smug grin is back* ... if lightning McQueen was real, would he get car insurance... or life insurance?

Edward: *snickers* Haha!

Arno: Oh mon Dieu! Do you ever shut up!

Alexios: well I know what movie we're not watching next. Thanks a lot, Jacob you just ruined cars for me!

Evie: I knew it was only a matter of time.

Achilles: And didn't I tell you to be quiet!? What happened to that!?

Jacob: yes, you specifically said "can you be quiet for five minutes." And I was quiet for exactly five minutes.

Rebecca: well how about literally longer than five minutes?

Jacob: nope! And did you know that the youngest photo of you... is technically the oldest photo of you.

Kassandra: remind me again as to why we have family events? If they're only going to end in disaster...

Haytham:... Is this how all the events usually end up being?

Connor: a good chunk of the time yes...

Haytham: huh, well look at that... I actually feel sorry for you for once son.

Jacob: if flys have their wings removed... are they then called walkers?

Ezio: Mio Dio, Jacob... stop.

Leonardo: here we go again...

Jacob: if a fire truck catches fire, it becomes the very thing it was sworn to destroy.

Desmond: Jacob don't make us have Altair kick your @$$ again.

Jacob: if the earth is the 3rd planet from the sun, doesn't that mean every country is a third world country?

Altair: ... *grabs a pillow from the couch and proceeds to scream all of his rage into it*

Jacob: if you sweat in a sweater... does that make you the sweater?

Shaun: pls someone makes him stop!

Bakey: how do we make him stop!?

Jacob: Lawyers hope you get sued, doctors hope you get sick, a mechanic hope you break down... but only a thief wishes you prosperity.

Evie: *takes the popcorn and gets up* well then I wish you all prosperity. *leaves to her room*

Desmond: hey! Wait that was mine!

Jacob: how come your lips don't touch, when you say the word touch, but touch when you say the word separate.

Alexios: oh like how you're tearing THIS FAMILY APART AGAIN!!!

Edward: *just laughing on the floor*

Jacob: There have likely been times in history where a leader was believed to have been poisoned but probably just had a severe food allergy.

Arno: I- ... that actually explains quite a lot now that I think about it.

Jacob: your future self is spying on you through memories.

Everyone: ... *looks over at Desmond* ...

Desmond: ... can we not, go over this again.

Jacob: you have to pretend to sleep, to fall asleep.

Aya: I'm going to throw him out of this house if he keeps this up.

Jacob: two wrongs don't make a right... but three lefts do.

Maria: this nightmare will never end will it...

Jacob: Your Teeth are warm.

Altair: . . . that's it! *pause the movie* COME HERE FRYE!

Jacob: NOT TODAY! *Jumps over the couch and runs upstairs to his room*

Altair: *runs after him*

The chase is once again lead to the second floor of the house as the remaining group is left downstairs to hear the echoes of the chase from the living room.

Everyone: ...

Malik: ... well I guess that takes care of that.

Leonardo: and I'm guessing like before, we aren't going to help him correct?

Shaun: yep.

Rebecca: Oh absolutely.

Desmond: pretty much... damn it now I gotta go make more popcorn. *gets up to make more*

Edward: *coughing and wheezing* Haha... ha...

While Desmond went to go do that the sound of the chase echoed from upstairs as it sounds like Jacob almost made it this time... almost. Jacob's screaming can be heard from the upstairs and the sound of something breaking.

Jacob: *upstairs* EVIE HELP! SAVE ME!!!

Evie: *from her room* you made your bed, you sleep in it. *closes her room door*

Jacob: NO EVIE WAIT-

And then the sound of glass shattering is followed as Jacob can be seen falling from the second floor to the front of the house from the living room window as Jacob moans in pain outside.

Desmond: *comes back in with more popcorn* got more popcorn.

Altair: *comes down stairs and sits back on the couch* ... so remind me again on why we are watching a movie about cars again?

Desmond: cause it's all about Family Altair. *eats some popcorn* it's all about family. *puts shades on and continues the movie*

Welcome back to part 2 of

Random thoughts with

Jacob Frye

Hope you guys enjoy this one ✌ and go check out part 1 of Random thoughts with Jacob Frye. Click the eagle to check out the first one.

🎩

🦅

Jacob: *sitting on the couch watching T.V with Edward and Desmond* ... the ocean is a soup.

Desmond: ... what?

Jacob: the ocean... is a soup.

Edward: how- ... oh my god he's right.

Desmond: ok are you two drunk again or something?

Jacob: think about it, what kind of stuff do you normally put in a soup?

Desmond: I mean, water obviously, some vegetables, meat for some like chicken noodles soup for example- . . . Oh my God the ocean is a soup-

Jacob: the ocean is a soup.

Desmond: Holy sh*t! the ocean is a soup!

Edward: see whose the drunk one now?

Desmond: . . . What tHE FUC-

Hello... is this a possible sneek peek for a sequel to another random thoughts with Jacob Frye? ...

Maybe 😏

Assassin's creed headcanon

Jealousy Pt. 1

In the assassin's creed household Altair, Ezio and Connor were sitting at the dining room table talking to one another, while close by in the living Jacob, Evie and Edward were watching T.V. Rebecca and Shaun both then walked into the house with groceries.

Rebecca: Hey, we're back from the store.

Ezio: saluti.

Altair: salam.

Connor: hey.

Evie: Welcome back.

Shaun: well the house isn't on fire so I'm assuming nothing of particular interest has happened yet.

Jacob: Oh! Shaun, Rebecca! Did you guys get anymore-

Rebecca: *puts the groceries down the kitchen counter* yes, it's in the grocery bag that I just put down.

Jacob: yes! *hops off the couch from the back and runs over to the kitchen and shuffles through the back*

Altair: what are you even looking for?

Jacob: *pulls out a bag of talkies* these babies!

Ezio: chips?

Edward: not just any chips lad. There spicey chips!

Jacob: Talkies!

Connor: talkies...

Shaun: you do know that the spice and flavoring is all artificial right? And those chips are more unhealthier to eat than a fast food meal, right?

Jacob: you know it's things like that, that get you uninvited to hang out with a large number of us right? *opens the bag of talkies and eats one*

Evie: Shaun makes a good point though Jacob.

Jacob: *shrugs and just continues to eat them*

Connor: can we try one, Jacob?

Jacob: Sure. *pulls out another bag and yeets it over to Connor*

Connor: *opens the bag and pulls one out* ... they look ok to me. *eats it*

Connor is caught a little off guard by how unnaturally hot it was but seemed to be fine with it.

Connor: Wow, that is a little hot.

Ezio: that's what she-

Altair: Don't. Don't even start with that Ezio. Not again for the 1,000 time this week alone.

Ezio: ... *shrugs* may I try one too?

Connor: go on ahead.

Ezio pulls out a talki and eats it was well, expecting it ahead of time, the spice however still got him a bit more than Connor.

Ezio: *coughs a bit* wow that is hot- *coughs* ... but tasty regardless.

Jacob: right! It hurts your mouth and stomach like hell, but it's addicting as such. *eats another one*

Ezio: Si. *looks over at Altair hands hand him the bag* you want to try one mentor?

Altair: ... *sighs* fine. *pulls out a chip and puts it in his mouth*

Altair had a bit of a similar reaction like Connor but seemed like he handled it a bit better.

Jacob: so what do you think?

Altair: hm... well, you're right about it being a bit addicting. Hm... definitely has a good spice kick for some artificially made. *pulls out a napkin*

Edward: Heh, looks like Altair is more fun then Shaun.

Rebecca: *wheezes*

Shaun: wow, what a compliment.

Edward: well it was more to Altair then to you, but ok.

Altair: *puts the napkin to his mouth and spits out the chip* However I will say that the chip isn't all that good. I don't like the chip part.

Jacob: what!? *rushes over to the dinning room table* I mean ya the powder is the best part, but the whole chip is what puts it all together! I mean... why spit out the chip with out the powder!?

Altair: *shrugs* I don't know, just taste off to me. *pulls out another talki, puts it in his mouth and spits in the napkin again*

Shaun: oh God he does it too.

Rebecca: *catches her breath* well I mean, it makes sence since their both related.

Connor: pardon?

Ezio: what do you mean?

Shaun and Rebecca both look at each other for a moment before looking back at the group.

Shaun: ... you ever seen Desmond eat a talki before in person?

Desmond: *comes down stairs* Hey guys- ah sweet you bought more talkies! *walks over to the table* Mind if I have one?

Altair: go ahead.

Desmond: Cool. *pulls out a talki and does the same thing Altair did* I like the powder, but I don't like the chip.

Jacob: WHY!?!?

Evie: *griminces a little*

Edward: Wow

Connor: ... I see what you mean now.

Ezio: ... what...

Desmond: what?

Shaun: you are disgusting.

Desmond: what!? That's just how I eat them, the chip is disgusting!

Altair: see he gets it. *pulls out another talki and does the same as before*

Desmond: ya, you see, Altair does it too, so why can't I?

Jacob: You both are RUINING TALKIS FOR ME!!!

Altair: *dead pan face* ... *slowly pulls out a talki puts it in his mouth then shortly spitting it out in a napkin* ... I don't care.

Jacob: >=(

Rebecca: Shau, Jacob just let them have their bond, plus you know what they say, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree... quite literally in this situation.

Shaun: true, besides, not like you can even tell the difference anyway.

Altair: ... what?

Desmond: what are you saying? That we're identical?

Evie: well... I mean... don't get me, wrong Mentor, Desmond, buy Yes. You both have some rather different hobbies and opinions... but as the days and months go by, you both are starting to share rather similar habits and thought processes.

Altair: we are not that alike.

Connor: she's not wrong.

Desmond: maybe in looks but, nah man there's no way.

Edward: I don't know. I mean, at this rate Desmond you might end up being no fun like Altair. *laughs*

Jacob: *W H E E Z E S*

Desmond: *dead pan* do you both want free drinks at the bar every time you come into my work place?

Edward and Jacob: *sighs* yes...

Desmond: that's what I thought.

Altair: Heh.

Both Desmond and Altair do a fist bump.

Ezio: ...

Desmond: all we do is just hang out sometimes, nothing much.

Altair: *nods in agreement*

Both Desmond and Altair grab another Talki and put it in their mouths and then spitting it out in a napkin. With Altair put the napkin to his mouth while Desmond wasn't as discreet as Altair was about it.

Shaun: can you two not, pls. It's disgusting.

Altair and Desmond: shut up Shaun, you don't hear any of us complaining about your constant bathroom trips from the amount of tea you drink.

Everyone: O_o . . .

Desmond: . . .

Altair: . . .

Ezio: ...

Everyone in the room was silent as both Altair and Desmond looked at each other surprised.

Desmond: . . . that was werid.

Altair: agreed.

Rebecca: Huh? The Apple really doesn't fall that far from the tree...

Evie: I don't think it fell at all...

Jacob: SEE! You two are the same!

Altair: It was just a one-time random coincidence. It means nothing.

Desmond: ya that doesn't mean anything.

Rebecca: Mhm sure~ it doesn't mean anything. *snikers*

Jacob and Edward: *snickering and wheezing*

Altair: oh, Ha ha, very funny.

Desmond: ok, name one thing that me and Altair have in common besides our looks.

Shaun: easy, so easy I can make an entire shopping list and/or thesis about it, but I'll stick with three. One, you both do that *points to Altair*

Altair: *spits out the talki in a napkin* ...

Shaun: two, you both take Uno way too bloody serious.

Desmond: Shaun Uno makes everyone angry, that one doesn't count.

Shaun: ok, how about the fact you both are extremely sarcastic.

Rebecca: you both like rock music.

Shaun: and both have the ridiculous audacity of blasting it at full max volume when given the chance!

Jacob: and I keep getting blamed for it! Thanks for that by the way! Altair!

Altair: no regrets here.

Evie: you both also like to play that one racing game on the Xbox thingy.

Desmond: seriously how are you so good at it Altair.

Altair: real-world experience.

Shaun: so driving at top speed, jumping over bridges, and driving like a maniac mixed with Vin Diesel.

Altair: it's all about family Shaun.

Desmond: Hell ya.

Rebecca: also how the hell do you not get a single scratch on any vehicle while doing any of that?

Altair: *shrugs*

Shaun: ok well back on topic you both are still alike.

Desmond and Altair: Shut the f@#$ (allaena) up Shaun... Damn it!

Rebecca: ... *wheezes* HA HAAA!!!

Shaun: oh my god...

Evie: *chuckles*

Jacob and Edward: *dying on the floor laughing*

Connor: *chuckles* so you two still aren't convinced?

Ezio: . . .

Desmond and Altair: it's not funny! ... Sh*t (alqarf)!

Rebecca: Oh come on you two I think it's kind of cute, it just shows, that you two have a strong bonding together.

Ezio: . . .

Desmond and Altair: *annoyed low growl*

Jacob and Edward: ... *laughing more on the floor*

Shaun: *wheezing*

Rebecca: *giggling*

Connor: *chuckles* ... huh?

Ezio: ...

Connor: Ezio?

Ezio: ...

Connor: ... huh? Ezio?

Ezio: . . .

Connor: Hello? Ezio?

Ezio: . . .

Connor: ... *sighs* EZIO!

Ezio: Hm!? What!? ...

Connor: Uhm... you ok? You've been staring at Altair and Desmond for an uncomfortably long time... you ok?

Ezio: Si... I'm... I'm fine...

Connor: ...are you sure?

Ezio: *looks back at Desmond and Altair* ...

As the group chuckles and laughs they two soon begin to talk with one another, seeming to chuckle amongst themselves while everyone else around them were starting to settle down. The two seemed to enjoy each other's company.

Ezio: . . . Si. . . I'm fine. . .

OOOOOOOOOO-

Looks like Ezio's feeling a little left out.

Yes

It has been sometime cause Tumblr wasn't letting me finsh some of the stuff I had untill the update came in, so everything should be working now. Unfortunately school is back up again, hopefully I'll still have time to work on stuff sorry for the wait everyone. Hope you enjoyed this headcanon and stay safe 😎👋🌙

Part 2 now out

Random thoughts with

Jacob Frye

The whole gang is having dinner, some sitting in the dining room, some in the living room, the rooms were connected so they could still have conversations as a group, as family... a dysfunctional yet still functional family.

Everyone: *eating*

Jacob: *eating* ... lizards are just snakes with legs. *eats some of his food*

Everyone: *pauses eating and looks at Jacob for a moment* ...

Jacob: ... what?

Connor: you just said lizards are like snakes, but with legs... why?

Jacob: what? I didn't say that.

Rebecca: Uhm, yes you did...

Jacob: no I didn't.

Malik: damn it Jacob for once we're having a decent and peaceful meal, don't ruin this for the rest of us.

Jacob: I didn't say anything.

Evie: ignore him, you'll only encourage him.

Jacob: cause I didn't say anything.

Malik: whatever.

Everyone: *continues eating*

Jacob: *eats a bit of his food* ... *smirks* ... why is it that there's a D in fridge, but not in the word, refrigerator.

Altair: *hard sighs* damn it he's doing it again.

Shaun: Jacob please for the love of humanity and the sanity that is of this house, please stop.

Jacob: did you know a guy had to lick a rock... and now we have salt.

Altair: I will pay you any amount of money just so you can shut up.

Jacob: *still smirking* by logic bees shouldn't be able to fly... and yet they fly anyway, so does that mean bees don't follow any rules but their queens.

Kassandra: Jacob, even I'm tired of hearing this please stop.

Edward: Ha! I'm not.

Arno: Well I am!

Jacob: icecream is just frozen cow juice.

Alexios: and you just ruined ice cream for me, thanks a lot Jacob.

Jacob: your car keys have traveled further than your car.

Leonardo: ... he's not wrong.

Evie: please don't encourage him any further.

Jacob: planes are just giant metal birds.

Bayek: Jacob please stop-

Jacob: The Jonas brothers can't break up, cause they're brothers.

Evie: sometimes I wish we could.

Alexios: You're tearing this family apart!

Jacob: lasagna is just spaghetti but in cake form!

Connor: This is why we can't have nice things, Jacob.

Desmond: ok I'm putting an end to this. Hey Altair.

Altair: what Desmond?

Desmond: did you know that humans have off switches, but you just have to hit them hard enough and a certain number of times to shut them off.

Jacob: ...

Altair: . . . *give Jacob a creepy and terrify grin with one of his golden eyes glowing from under his cowl*

Jacob: O_O

Altair: >=D Jacob.

Jacob: ... what?

Altair: come here, Jacob.

Jacob: ... n-no, no, t-think I'm ok and safer here-

Altair: I wasn't asking Jacob.

Jacob: ...

Altair: . . .

Jacob: ... *quickly gets up and makes a run for upstairs*

Altair: *gets up and runs after him* COME HERE JACOB!

Jacob: SH*T, SH*T, SH*T!

Altair: *murderous grin on his face* I JUST WANNA PUNCH YOUR OFF SWITCH FRYE!

Jacob: I THINK IM GOOD FROM THE SAFETY OF MY ROOM!

They both run upstairs and the chase continues as they hear the sound of the two running echos to downstairs.

Leonardo: ... should we stop him?

Everyone else: ...

Rebecca: Nah, he'll be fine.

Shaun: agreed.

*Jacob screaming from upstairs*

Altair from upstairs: I gotcha you little Frye!

Desmond: ... ya he's fine.

Evie: he's been through worse and I'll just take care of him afterward.

Everyone continues to eat as a minute goes by the sound of Jacob tumbling down the stairs; into the living, followed by Altair walking down the stairs and he goes back to the dining room table and sits back down in his seat.

Altair: *eats some of his food* ... so how's everyone's day been?

Aveline: good.

Desmond: same here.

Altair: good. So Desmond I heard-

Jacob: *cough* Technically... y-you can't die *cough* in the livingroom cause, it's... called... the living-room *wheezy laughs before passing out*

Everyone: ...

Altair: ... so where were we?

Do you just... have shower thoughts... though technically if you have weird thoughts in another room, does that mean their room thought?

Part 2 now available

Jacob: Hey Leonardo! Think you can build me, Arno, Edward, Alexios and Ezio this really obscure, crazy and possably dangerous contraption for us!?

Leonardo: absolutely not Jacob.

Later

Ezio: Ciao Leonardo! Do you think you can make me and the amigos this really obscure, crazy and possably dangerous contraption for us?

Leonardo: *with a smile* Why of course I can Ezio! It will be ready by next morning!

Ezio: *looks over to the group and give them a thumbs up*

Jacob, Edward, Alexios and Arno hiding and peeking over a corner: *gives Ezio both thumbs up, except Arno*

Arno: *facepalm* I can't believe that actually worked.

The French

and

The Irish

An Assassin's Creed Headcanon

Warning may contain a lot of physical violence

The fight was fears and on going, the assassin family has infuriated Abstergo, but were caught last minute during their escape. It was Assassin v.s. Templar. Each assassin was fighting someone from their home time period and soon it turned into an all out free for all, that soon took a very interesting turn.

Cesare: YOUR DEAD AUDITORE!!! *clashes his sword with Ezio's*

Ezio: *blocks it with his sword* I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU TRY BORGIA!

Robert: GET OVER HERE FRYE! *drops his sword down towards Jacob*

Jacob: WHOA! *Doges out the way* HA! Gonna have to try a little harder then that, big guy!

Robert: *low growls*

Crawford: You fight well boy! But I will no be defeated by an assassin! *fires his pistol at Connor*

Connor: *pulls out a pistol and fires back* AND I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE!

Julius Caesar: *running from Altair* GET THIS PSYCHO AWAY FROM ME!

Altair: *Chasing Julius Caesar with sword in hand* COME HERE alkaliba!

Desmond: YOU ATTACKED THE WRONG ASSASSIN FAMILY F@#$ERS! *using his Isu power and just throwing energy balls to hit any Abstergo security*

Haytham: QUICK TAKE DESMOND DOWN BEFORE HE-

Maria: *punches Haytham in the face*

Haytham: Fu-

Maria: Evie heads up! *Swings Haytham over to Evie*

Evie: *smacks Haytham in the stomach with her cane*

Haytham: *winces in pain and falls to the ground*

The security guards begin firing their guns towards any of the assassins but it was rather difficult with the Templar historians fighting the assassins up close. In a van hiden in an Alleyway, Shaun, William, Rebecca, Leonardo, Claudia and Achilles were watching from the van's computer monitors watching the fight go down from the inside.

Leonardo: things are not going well in the assassins favor...

Claudia: They need to get out of there.

Achilles: and quick.

William: *press the intercom button* Desmond! You need to get the family tree out of there now!

Desmond: we're trying! There's to many of them!

Shaun: well you better think of something quick!

Desmond: I got it! I got it!

The assassin we're started to get cornered as the security guards coming more in numbers and the assassin trying there best to hold them off

Kassandra: there's to many!

Altair: it is no use we must retreat with out the asset!

Senu was dive bombing at some of the guards but was swatted out the air by a guard and fell by Bayek and Aya.

Bayek: Senu! *picks up Senu and holds him* you ok!?

Senu: *whimpers*

Cesare: End of the line assassins!

Charles Lee: *kicks Arno down*

Arno: *falls in pain* It's no use! What do we now?! *lays there in pain*

Desmond: uh, uh- *notices Shay* ... oh man I'm gonna regret doing this... here goes. Hey Arno, uh there's something I gotta tell you before we all die here.

Arno: *grunts in pain* what?

Desmond: well uh... *deep inhales* SHAY CORMAC WAS THE ONE WHO KILLED YOUR REAL FATHER!!!

The room went dead silent as the echo of Desmond's words spread through the room, the guards paused what they were doing and all turn to look at Desmond, even the templar historians and the assassins had paused what they were doing and looked at Desmond before looking over to Shay.

Arno: *slowly sits up to looking at Shay with a shocked expression* ... Quel? ...

Shay: ... refresh my memory again, for I have hunted down many assassins, what was his father's name again?

Haytham: *slowly standing up* I believe his name was *cough* ah, excuse me, uh Charles Dorian, Shay, remember.

Shay: Charles Dorian... oh yes I remember him now... I was unaware he had son... let alone it to be you Arno.

Arno: ...

Evie: oh poor Arno...

Jacob: hey uh... Arny... you gonna be ok?

Arno: . . .

Ezio: Arno? Amico?

Arno: . . . .

Desmond: ... I think I f@#$ed up...

From the van the gang was just as quiet.

Everyone: ...

Shaun: ... *pushes the intercom button* I think you did Desmond... I think you did.

Leonardo: oh my...

Claudia: that was a rather unexpected turn... povero...

Achilles: *sighs* and so the truth finally comes out... not how I expected it but...

Back in the building.

Arno: ...

Shay: listen Arno if it makes you feel any better I can assure you that your father-

Arno: *quickly quickly gets up* AAAAAAHH!!! *Rushes at shay tackling him to the ground and begins punching him repeatedly in the face*

Everyone gasp in shock.

Edward: HOLY SH*T LAD!

Arno: YOU PUTAIN DE BASTARED!!! YOU RUINED MY F@#$ING LIFE YOU CONNARD!!!!

Haytham tries to help Shay but is ameditly shoved in the stomach in the same place as the cane hit him by Arno and falls to the Ground in pain. Charles Lee rushes over to Haytham's aid as the entire room watched the two fight.

Arno: I'M GOING TO KILL YOU SHAY CORMAC!!!

Shay: *fighting back* WILL YOU CALM DOWN YOU CRAZY FRENCH MANIAC!!!

Arno topals over Shay and starts to strangle him in a blinding rage.

Altair: well you did kill his father and if I was Arno... I'd definitely do the same thing.

Robert: your not helping, girl stealer.

Altair: I never said I was baldi.

Arno: *turns his head around to Altair and Robert, his hands still on Shay's neck* SHUT UP YOU TWO AND MINED YOUR OWN F@#$ING BUSINESS!

Robert and Altair: ...

Shay: *kicks Arno in the stomach and punches him in the face*

Arno falls over and with Shay's fist in his face he grabs shay by the wrist and punches him repeatedly in the face and the two start to tackle one another and rolling over one another punch and kicking each other and yelling at one another in their home language.

Jacob: GO ARNY! KICK THAT BLOODY BASTERED TO THE CURB!

Edward: ARNO! ARNO!

Jacob and Edward: ARNO! ARNO!

Jacob, Edward, Alexios: ARNO! ARNO! ARNO!

Altair: *face palm*

Shay: FRENCH C@#$!

Arno: IRISH CHIENNE!

Shay: *spits in Arno's face*

Arno: AAAAAH!!! *punches shay in the face*

The group in the van was watching the fight between Arno and Shay and just stood and sit there watching in shock.

William: *pinches the bridge of his nose and shakes his head*

Shaun: ... what the bloody hell?

Leonardo: ...

Achilles: *sighs* I knew this would happen the day he found out...

Claudia: ...

Rebecca: ya! Go Arno! Kick his @$$!

Everyone in the van just look at Rebecca.

Rebecca: what! Everyone was fighting each other not that long ago and now your looking at me like I'm the crazy French guy beating up the Irish Templar.

Shaun: ... that's oddly specific...

Back at Abstergo the fight between the two kept going and so far the two are too equally matched for one another.

Desmond: ... ok should we all a gree here to uh, just settle this whole thing another time or?

Laureano: yes... let us uhm... do this possible at a more suitable time...

Desmond: cool, ok Arno that's enough!

Arno ignored Desmond and continued to fight Shay fist to fist.

Jacob: Arny... buddy you can stop now...

Shay: YOUR FATHER WAS PART OF AN ORGANIZATION THAT CARED LITTLE FOR THE INNOCENT AND CLEARLY STILL IS TODAY!

Arno: MY LIFE IS RUINED BECAUSE OF YOU! I WOULD HAVE STILL HAD MY FATHER IN MY LIFE IF IT WASN'T FOR YOU! *starts to tear up* I WOULD HAVE HAD A MUCH MORE BETTER LIFE! A FAMILY BACK HOME! YOU TOOK THAT AWAY FROM ME!!! *is now back on top of Shay and is just giving him no mercy and keeps punching him in the face over and over again*

Altair: I had enough of this! *martches over to Arno and grabs him and locks Arno's arms back* THAT'S ENOUGH ARNO!!!

Arno struggles and tries to escape Altair's grasp as some of the other assassins had to come help hold Arno back. Haytham quickly rushed over to Shay and helped him up along with Charles Lee and some of the other templars came to his aid as well and helped him up.

Arno: *in tears* YOU BASTARED! YOU RUINED EVERYTHING!!! YOU-

Jacob: ARNO THAT'S ENOUGH! *slaps him across the face*

Arno: ... *starts to cry* You @$$hole!!! You took everything from me!!! *sobs*

The Templars: ...

Cesare: I think you all should leave now...

Connor: not like we were planning on staying anyway.

The assassins start making there way to the exit when.

Shay: *pants* Hey!

Arno: *turns around*

Shay: *deep tired breathing* ... I killed your father soith.

Arno: . . . AAAAAAAAAH!!! *Breaks free and rushes at Shay and drop kicks him in the gut*

Yep 2:37 at night watching spongebob and this is what I come up with. I hope you guys enjoy this assassin's creed headcanon, stay healthy and safe out there everyone and see you next time. 👋

Altair: *reading in the living room*

*the circle of life from the lion king starts playing faintly from the kitchen*

Altair: ... what the hell? *gets up and head towards the kitchen*

Altair: what is going on- !

Jacob: *standing on top of the sink hold Nasir over head like he was presenting him*

Edward: *holding up his phone on max volume playing the circle of life*

Nasir: -_- *has some ketchup on his forehead*

Altair: what are you doing with my cat?

Edward and Jacob: O_O ...

Jacob: ... its the circle of life.

Altair: ... *facepalm*

✌ Yo got two new bois in a day 😆😎

I say this event was a success!

Duccio gets thrown out

Pt. 1

An Assassin's creed of bel air headcanon

Claudia was upset that day, she came home late almost saddened. Her brother Ezio and the other assassins came to try and help comfort her, but with Duccio around...

Claudia: oh ezio! Why must I have such a hard time with men! Even in the future my luck is absolutely dreadful...

Ezio: *Hugs Claudia* it is ok Claudia, you will be ok.

Desmond: I still can't believe those @$$holes at the store just harassed you like that.

Rebecca: listen Claudia men can be @$$holes sometimes, some worst then others. Like take Shaun for example. Sometimes I wanna punch him so hard in the face when he's being negative all the time, but at least he's not publicly harassing me.

Shaun: exactly... wait. HEY!

Claudia: men are just pigs... oh! No offence to you all!

Arno: It's ok Claudia, we understand.

Jacob: ya, some of us men are just bloody @$$es.

Evie: some, are more annoying then others, but yes.

Jacob: exactly! ...wait. HEY!

Leonardo:everything will be fine Claudia *hugs Claudia*

Claudia: thank you. Thank you all.

Duccio walks in.

Duccio: what's going on here?

Altair: no.

Duccio: what?

Altair: OUT!

Duccio: che cosa! (What) why?!

Altair: You will only make this manner worse, I know it.

Duccio: I just want to know what's happening, that's all, promise! *raises his left arm up and right arm on his chest*

Connor: just tell him, he'll just keep bugging us till we do tell him.

Altair: ... *crosses his arms* Claudia was harassed by men today at the store.

Claudia: not like you care.

Duccio: well I could always get a marriage license.

Everyone was confused at what Duccio had just said.

Edward: ...what?

Duccio: so she doesn't get harassed by men so much. That is if she performs on the test drive.

Everyone in the room went silent for a moment speechless to what Duccio had suggested.

Claudia: >=( ...

Leonardo: *hold Claudia closer to him* Ezio... Get him. >=|

Ezio walked over to Duccio and grabbed him by the back collar of his shirt and started angrily dragging him to the front of the house.

Duccio: WHAT I DID DO?!! WHAT DID I DO?!!

Jacob gladly opened the front door of the house holding it like he was holding it for someone (that someone being Duccio) and with every ounce of energy and anger, Ezio had tossed Duccio out of the house and into the front yard.

Duccio: AAAH! *lands face first on to the ground*

And there you have it fokes Duccio get thrown out of the house! (Yes there will be more parts >= ] ) Based on the funny compilations of Jazz getting thrown out of the house.

Honestly this idea came to mine when I was re-watching some fresh prince of bel air and then I saw this scene where jazz got thrown out of the house and I began thinking... who is somewhat like jazz... who would be worthy of being thrown out of the house besides Jacob... then it hit me!

It was clear as day that Duccio was destined to be thrown out by either Altair or Ezio! (Mostly Ezio)

I hope you enjoyed this assassin's creed of bel air headcanon 😉👌😎 more is to be expected.

Random headcanon time!

What if Altair meet Sans undertale?

Altair: *humming while reading his book*

Out of no where sans poofs right next to Altair.

Altair: *hears poof and turns over to see sans* O_O

Sans: wow. Where am I? Wait, don't tell me I got dragged into yet another AU about me? *notices Altair standing next to him*

Altair: um...

Sans: or... someone else's AU?...

Sans and Altair stare at each other in silent for an uncomfortably long time.

Altair: ... who are you? And also... what are you?

Sans: oh! I'm Sans, Sans the skeleton.

Altair: ... you are a skeleton?

Sans: yep, I thought that be pretty obvious by now. Heh

Altair: ... why are you here?

Sans: um... to be completely honest... I have no idea how I even got here?

Altair: ... are you hostile!? *pulls out a throwing knife* *eagle glare*

Sans: uh... na, to much work. I mostly sleep, so not much hostility going on with me. But it was "knife" to meet'cha, Hehe.

Altair: (oh great another joker...)

Sans: what's the matter, you don't find my jokes... humorous? Hehe!

Altair: *low growls*

Sans: ok, ok, I'll stop now.

Altair: hm... *puts knife away*

Sans: well, now that's out of the way, let's just get to the pointof things, so mind telling me who you are?

Altair: ... my name is Altair.

Sans: Altair uh? Well it's nice to meet you. So uh... where exactly am I?

Altair: your in my descendant, Desmond's house.

Sans: ... how old are you exactly?

Altair: 30

Sans: *sighs* hehe, you had me for a second their cause I thought you said descendant for a second-

Altair: I did.

Sans: O_0 ... um... what year were you born in?

Altair: January 11, 1165

Sans: uh... ok wow, hehe- wasn't expecting that, but geez... (I guess this world is capable of... time travel magic... or science?) I maybe an undead skeleton, but your even older then me gramps.

Altair: *low growl* well, how old are you?

Sans: well surprisingly I'm actually in my 30s too. *turns to readier* look it up, it's there.

Altair: ... so where exactly are you from?

Later

Sans: and that's basically how Frisk the human child saved every monster like me from the underground, now humans and monsters are starting to get along happily on the surface together and our lives have never been more at peace.

Altair: hm... interesting... so this determination is what gives the child the ability to manipulate time and space?

Sans: yep. Just like the pieces of Eden that you told me about.

Jacob and Edward walk by the couch.

Jacob: hey Altair, sans.

Edward: hey lads.

Altair: hey.

Sans: sup.

Jacob and Edward keep walked untill they got to the kitchen where they froze for a short second before walking backwards towards the couch.

Jacob and Edward stare at the skeleton in the blue hoodie.

Jacob: O_O

Edward: O_O

Sans: ... uh... hi?

Jacob: ... Altair... why is their a skeleton that looks an awful lot like sans... sitting next you?

Altair: *shrugs shoulders*

Sans: that's because I am sans?

Jacob and Edward: ... HOLY SH*T IT SANS-

More later

All of Desmond's ancestors soon found themselves all sitting around the skeleton in the blue jack, listening to him telling his jokes.

Sans: so I said knock, knock, then they said, who's there? I go. Dishes. They replied. Dishes who? Then I said, dishes a very bad knock knock joke. Hehe!

Half of Desmond's ancestors laughed at the skeleton's joke.

Jacob: HAHA! This skeleton's a bloody riot! HAHA!

Ezio: Haha! Si he truly is.

Edward: I could drink to that.

Desmond unlocked the front door and walked in with Shaun and rebecca with some groceries in their hands.

Desmond: *locks the door* hey guys.

Ancestors: hey Desmond.

Rebecca: Did everyone behave themselves?

Altair: yes.

Shaun: good.

Desmond: oh hey sans.

Sans: sup.

They walk past the couch to put the groceries away and after words they quickly realized what just happened and walked back to the couch.

Sans: ... oh boy here we go... 3, 2, 1-

Desmond, Shaun and Rebecca:

SAAAANS-

Well heres a new comic idea for ya... I actually might draw this at some point. Welp hope you enjoyed this anyway!

Ok so I decided to do something different and so what if Desmond taught his ancestors how to play undertale and decide to let them pick what route to pick first.

Altair: Altair did genocide first, then neutral, and then pacifist last after words he just tried to find all the secrets in the game that he could find, leaving no stone unturned. he's more interested in the lore then the characters in the game. He claims that he doesn't have a favorite character but he secretly likes sans. Desmon was the only one who knew this little secret of his, he found out when he saw Altair looking up San's theme song (megalovania) on his phone (that Shaun bought him) The reason why he never told anyone was because Altair threatened to kill him if he told. Altair knows sans is practically everyone's favorite character, but he didn't care, he just liked sans because he can relate to him in some ways and he likes his theme song, the only thing he doesn't like about sans is his annoying jokes. When he encountered flowey for the first time... lets just say he didn't take flowey's happiness pellets... the first 100 of them.

Ezio: ezio did flirt pacifist route first, he would charm and flirt his way threw fights. His favorite fight was with Mettaton both pacifist and genocide, sometimes the others would catch him doing some of the poses Mettaton would do in the game, in his room. He likes to think that his friendship with leonardo was just like Mettaton and Alphys's friendship. The hardest fight he had to do was the end of the genocide route with sans. He'd been stuck on that fight for hours, refusing to turn off the computer to take a break from playing the game, after 2 hours and a half, with some help from Desmond and Altair, he finally beat the route.

Connor: connor did pacifist route first. When connor got to snowdon and found out he could pet the dog characters in the game, let's just say he spent hours petting lesser dog, he petted him so much he actually managed to break threw the screen... don't ask how it happened... it just... happened. Connor's favorite fight was with the animals except on genocide, it pained him so much to do genocide and fight the animals. He like all the cool animal characters in the game, but his most favorite character was toreil (goat mom!) When Connor meet toreil for the first time he'd think about his own mother. It almost broke his little heart to do genocide and kill off all the animal characters in the game. Connor never finshed genocide because of it. His second favorite character was tammy, he even help tammy get to college. Just like everyone else he found flowey most displeasing at first, both him and Altair didn't trust flowey the first time they saw him. nothing is true everything is permitted.

Desmond: Desmond did neutral run first, mainly because he couldn't decide which route to do first, later on he did pacifist then genocide last. Desmond would play the game like any other person would, his favorite character was frisk cause he could relate to frisk having to save the underground and be forced to make the decision based on other people's choices. He liked having his say in things and having his own choices. He also had a second favorite character which was sans, mainly cause of the memes about him and the jokes sans would tell in the game. He also thought the whole time travelling prank sans did was kind of funny and was super excited to see sans in smash. (as a mii fighter)

Kassandra and Alexios: Kassandra and Alexios both did genocide first just to get a challenge from the game, then they did neutral for the flowey boss fight. The spartan twins favorite character and fight was with undyne both genocide and pacifist, but both had a meager headaches fighting sans. They saw sans as their biggest challenge yet, to them sans was an enemy they must defeat. they spent weeks and nights trying to beat sans. Eventually they beat sans and as a victory they both shouted so loud that everyone in the house heard it... GET DUNKED ON SANS! at the same time together.

Edward: Edward didn't care which one to started off with (neutral), all he cared was get as much money in the game as possible. He even looked up a tutorial on how to hack his way into getting all the money in the game. He had so much money he bought the tammy armor on his first run. His favorite character was undyne as well as her fights. His least favorite character was chara cause just like flowey and everyone in the house chara. creeped. him. out.

Jacob: Jacob did pacifist first then neutral, he never bothered finishing genocide. The reason being because he was never able to beat sans, Jacob spent a month and a half before giving up and accepting defeat. Jacob loved playing pacifist run, he loved all the goofy characters and all, but his most favorite characters were the skela-font bros he pictured him and evie as like the skeleton brothers, more specially papyrus was his favorite, he loved how papyrus was always goofy and fun loving, his favorite papyrus moment was when he jumped out of undyne's house window. He even did the stunt himself, let's just say Shaun was pissed at him for a week, making Shaun having to be the one to replace the busted window. His second favorite was sans just because he told a lot of good jokes jokes jokes🎶

Evie: evie also did pacifist first mainly cause Jacob baged her to do pacifist first. And she did not regret doing pacifist first she enjoyed every moment in the pacifist run. She loved the music, the characters, the story line of the game, it was amazing. Evie also did neutral and genocide too but it would never top pacifist for her. Her favorite character was Asriel. She found his goat form so cute and felt so bad for him, making flowey less creepy and scarey to her.

Arno: did neutral first. When he found out about the poor six children that fell in the underground he felt bad. Seeing how they help him made him feel hopeful for the young generation and felt like there was hope for humanity. he felt determined. He then did pacifist run. His favorite character was muffet, he loved the music muffet had in her battle and he admired the fact that she specialized in baking, it reminded him of the pastries from France. When he fought her in genocide run and saw her death for some reason it reminded him of Elsie... everyone in the house had to help cheer him up that day.

Haytham: Haytham did neutral first genocide then pacifist. His favorite character is Asgore. Haytham honestly agrees with Asgore having to make sacrifices to get the six human souls, he had to do what he must to set the monsters free. He mainly did neutral because he didn't want to be friends with anyone but also didn't want to kill anyone. When he did the flowey fight he was disturbed and was scard for life. He had no problem doing genocide but everytime he killed an animal based character (especially dogs) his son connor would give him murder eyes for everyone he killed. When he finshed genocide connor forced him to do pacifist just to make it up... and he did... eventually after some father and son punching talking.

Bayke: Bayke did pacifist first then neutral. He never did genocide cause he did like the idea of killing innocent monsters. He got a little teary eyed when he finshed neutral run see how the monsters he met in the underground were still doing good and miss the human child that they had befriended and he felt bad for the six human children that saved his life. When he was playing undertale for the first time he let his hawk Senu watch him play on his sholder. His favorite character is sans and monster kid. He liked sans for the funny puns he made and monster kid cause he was such a sweet kid and admired his determination to help defend the human child frisk.

Clay: clay did pacifist first then neutral. He never did genocide run, it reminded him to much of the suffering that he has seen and experienced as a test subject. He played undertale from inside of Shaun's computer. His favorite character is W.D. Gaster because just like gaster he was stuck alone in a void like environment left to watch as the world moves on with out him...

GASTER: 🖐 ♐♏♏● 🔼□🔷️🔳 🔲♋♓◼

Bonus

In the assassin house hold

Altair, Ezio, connor, and Desmond were sitting on the couch watching TV while shaun sat at the dinning room table working on his computer while rebecca sat across from him listening to music. Evie had just came walking into the living room and sat on the ground in front of the couch.

Evie: what are you guys up to?

Desmond: watching tiger king on Netflix.

Connor: I hate this show. This guy and his crew are just hurting innocent animals for fun with no reason behind this act what so ever.

Ezio: ya Leonard would not approve of this show at all.

Altair: ... where's your brother at?

Evie: oh he's playing that game Desmond showed us.

Altair: which one?

Evie: undertale I believe.

Desmond: still trying to beat genocide run ay?

Evie: *sigh* ya, still trying to beat that skeleton in the genocide run.

Altair: that fight was to easy, it took me an hour and a half to beat it.

Ezio: it's been almost a month and a half, he's never gonna beat it.

Connor: didn't you also struggle with the sans fight too? And didn't you ask Altair and Desmond had to help you beat it.

Ezio: ... shut up connor- and hey! Eventually I did beat sans on my own thank you every much!

A sudden shout could be heard from up stairs. Everyone had paused what they were doing as a sudden sound of loud running foots steps came rushing down the stairs.

Jacob came ran down to the living room with a black laptop that had the assassin's creed syndicate symbol on it.

The next thing they knew Jacob slammed the laptop onto the coffee table next to the couch. Surprisingly it didn't break on impact. And at the top of his lungs he shouted so loud that the entire house heard him shout.

Jacob: GREAT! GOOGLY MOOGLY IT'S ALL GONE TO SH*T!!!

Jacob then threw one of his throwing knives at the living room window, shattering it to pieces and with no hesitation he yeeted himself out the window.

Jacob: NEEEEAY!!!

Jacob landed face first onto the grass of their front lawn. Everyone on the couch including evie had stood up the minute he jumped out the window. Rebecca slowly removed her earbuds out from her ear and Shaun slowly closing his laptop. everyone's jaws dropped in that moment.

Soon everyone in the house had heard the commotion going on from their rooms and came rushing down stairs to investigate, upon seeing what Jacob had done their jaws had dropped as well.

Shaun: ... *deep in hale* ... JACOB WHAT THE FU-

If assassin's creed characters played undertale | part 1 | coming soon |

R.I.P. Edward Kenway, you would’ve loved Divorced Dad Rock.