I Do Wanna Point Out That One Of If Not Both The Twins Could Also Be Intersex!

It's like some people think intersectionality is a math problem?

Trans + man = cancels out so no oppression

Trans + woman = double oppression

And that's just? Not how real life works? Like you can't come to a conclusion via logic math problem and then insist it's reality because it makes sense inside the theory you've crafted.

You have to check it actually aligns with what is happening out in the world - Which is trans men sharing all the ways systemic and institutional transphobia targets us and affects us.

You can't just tell us to shut up because you like your theory better and you're upset our lived experience messes it up.

You can't tell us we don't experience what we live every day?

Hope I'm not derailing at all, but I had a very similar experience trying to get breastforms for a friend of mine.

Can't make this up, one of the only two companies we found that made breast forms for darker skin just didn't fucking bother colouring in the areolas.

For the record, the lighter toned breastform they made had them colored in. It was literally only the one geared towards Black people that didn't. I genuinely cannot think of any good faith explanation for this.

Roughly speaking, we could find 1-4 light skin toned breastforms per company. After going through god knows how many, we found two geared towards black people, and one of them was the aforementioned No Areola breastform. And if you had anything in the middle, you were simply shit out of luck, as my friend was.

I have had better luck finding packers and straps for more varied skin tones where I am, but evidently that's not a universal experience.

So I'm starting this thing with this guy and I went to an *ahem* adult goods store because my previous harness is a modified pair of briefs that was tight when I was about 20lbs lighter and most assuredly I do not fit anymore and he's coming over in 2 weeks so I don't quite trust shipping atm

But also within that store was genuinely nothing that could even be close to my skin tone. They had "realistic" white skintones, bright purple and pink, and a few solid black or solid grey. Nothing in browner skin tones.

And it just reminded me of how much antiblackness is baked into society. That the only realistic penis is apparently one that belongs gs to a white man, and that black bodies are so undesirable while white bodies are considered the default.

Hmm

I just saw a critique of “oh so transmascs can use a word which is clumsy in its etymology to talk on their oppression and we can’t criticize that, but TME/TMA is able to be criticized on that basis?”

And… it’s kinda different when you actually put these two things in context.

TMA/TME as a binary like cis/trans or multispec/mono or aspec/allo is on a first-stage of language creation, as far as I’m aware. There hasn’t been a 6+ year-long history of trying new words in the face of people nitpicking etymology while having the actual issue behind the needing a new term not engaged with in the meantime which proves that the word isn’t the actual problem and that this is only in-bad-faith in order to shut us up.

I understand the frustration, I even get a knee-jerk reaction to being told that the language you’re using is maybe not the best language (especially considering some of these people were the ones actively utilizing that tactic against transmascs wanting to speak on our issues; they’d be extra prone to be wary of this tactic). But a critique of the word choice itself being harmful isn’t in-and-of-itself a bad-faith critique, especially when it’s on a first attempt at the language and not a nitpick about etymology but a problem with labelling other people’s experiences as being totally exempt for them.

Like. On the surface you can make the “oh so transmascs don’t have to be perfect in their language but transfems do?” argument. But when you actually dig into what’s being discussed it really isn’t that simple.

TRANS, NONBINARY, AND INTERSEX PEOPLE OF COLOR DO NOT FUCKING HAVE PRIVILEGE OVER WHITE ANYONE ARE YOU FUCKING FOR REAL????????????

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