How Dare He. How Dare He Give His Affection To Some Random Child Instead Of His Own Blood. How Dare He
How dare he. How dare he give his affection to some random child instead of his own blood. How dare he not even search for his brother. It isn’t fair. It isn’t fair that Marcus has love and adoration, while Snatcher has nothing but fear. Sure he ate a few (dozen) people, but it isn’t his fault he was hungry. He couldn’t help it. It just wasn’t fair. Well, maybe it’s a little fair, he has been terrorizing the kingdom for over 2 decades now after all. It doesn’t really matter anyway. His reputation isn’t the point here. The point here is that Marcus is about to add another member to his family. Now, Snatcher can’t let this happen for a few reasons.
1. It isn’t fair that Marcus has people to care for.
2. It isn’t fair that Marcus has people who care for him.
3. Even if Marcus does do his best to care for people, Snatcher could DEFINITELY care for people better. He is the oldest after all.
Maybe he should demonstrate that. He could be wayyyy better at caring for a child than Marcus. He could prove it. All he needed was a child. Luckily he knows where to find one, holding onto his dear younger brother’s hand. It should be pretty easy.
This is an approximation of The Subon Snatcher’s thoughts as he began to slither alongside the two figures walking down the forest path back towards the manor. If he wanted to do this, he would have to do it soon, as the shrubs would stop being thick enough to hide him a few yards away.
A large creature slithers out of the brush. It is unlike anything Marcus has ever seen before, with glistening long yellowed fangs, elongated eyes the color of slightly dirty gold, a long sinuous body covered in feathers a shade or two darker than the skin of a plum, and two long and thin legs with claws on the end.
“A child for me before a child for you.” The creature hissed.
It’s arms darted out to grab his new little girl, who Marcus had recently discovered was named Beatrice.
“Stop!”
The shout echoed through the trees. It took Marcus a moment to realize that the exclamation had come from his own mouth.
“You want a child? I can get you one, please just leave Beatrice alone.” A pleading tone leaked into the king’s voice. Of course he would never actually give The Snatcher (as that is the name of this beast in front of him. Marcus had heard complaints of him for as long as he can remember) a child. He just wanted this serpentine avian to leave them alone.
“Will you now?” The Snatcher hissed coldly.
“Of course!” Marcus replied, a little too quickly. “I’ll come back as soon as I can with a nice juicy little girl for you.”
“I don’t believe you.” A skeptical expression, or as close as you can get with such a monstrous form, slid onto the snake’s face.
“R…really? Perhaps you could come back to the city and help you pick one out?” Of course, this was Marcus just trying to buy time, There’s no way this thing would be stupid enough to come to the village with him, right?
“Alright, but you’d better walk fast. You humans are all so slow.” Aaaand nevermind then. Apparently he’s doing this.
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HECK YEAH THIS IS MY SUBMISSION
Cat 007 from Cat Simulator 2015
EXACTLY!!!
this is all I could think about when it was on screen
:) thanks I needed to hear this
hey. don't cry. I went to Mad At You island and none of your friends were there :)
Sorry the next Subcon lindworm stuff is taking so long, my keyboard is messed up and can no longer type quotation marks and also sometimes the letters h b g j I u y. As ou can understand, this makes typing up anything kinda hard when your buttons sometimes just decide not to function. I’m working on it though.
the campaign I ran this past year (ended now due to scheduling conflicts) had 2 warlocks with the Eldritch concept of a frog beyond human comprehension as a patron.
the Erdrich blasts were the frog licking the enemy with his long tongue.
Less Impressive Warlock Patrons
A metric fuckton of quasits who collectively add up to the power of one balor.
Mid tier internet celebrity who gives you instructions in the form of 3 hour video essays. That's how their eldritch blasts work too, incidentally.
Another Warlock! See, if you become patron to 10 warlocks, who become patrons to...
The Algorithm.
Keir Starmer
A really big guy. I know, I know, he doesn't sound like a patron, but you don't understand. He's really big.
Blorbo (From your show)
The Bit
The lifepath system from Traveller.
Undying Patron who's a gestalt of the souls of every monster you kill, that's why you get EXP from killing things.
1/1000th of a pact with a 1000 different patrons at once.
"Powerful Fiend" no-one else has heard of who bears a distinct resemblance to the warlock wearing a halloween devil costume. Odd that!
![[start ID: Drawing of Anya, Curly & Daisuke from Mouthwashing but they're dogs with Swansea being their owner. Anya is a dark gray Borzoi/Afghan Hound mix wearing a service dog vest. Curly is a golden retriever wearing a blue-green bandana. Daisuke is a brown pomeranian puppy wearing a pink hawaiian shirt. Swansea is wearing a fanny pack & holding all 3 of their leashes, presumably taking them on a walk, except to his annoyance 1 of his legs has gotten tangled in Daisuke's leash. Daisuke is unphased & cheerfully skipping. Anya's on the other side of Swansea, standing a little bit behind him in case he falls, looking over at Daisuke. Curly is beside Anya, playcrouching with a tennis ball in his mouth, also looking at Daisuke. The background is teal & white with a paw print pattern across it. :end ID]](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f1164f99bfe459dea2e8aa1a6afcb7a8/4143c78a6a826758-ad/s500x750/cd2113a53dae5750e1e5f2287ffd4b64480a139d.png)
![[start ID: Drawing of Swansea & Daisuke from Mouthwashing but as dogs. Swansea is an old english bulldog colored in different shades of tan. Daisuke is a brown pomeranian in a pink hawaiian shirt. Swansea is lying on the ground as bulldogs do, scowling as much as a dog can. Daisuke is yipping & yapping all around him. :end ID]](https://64.media.tumblr.com/cc17ea7a674ed267a1a8fe8003d0d4e5/4143c78a6a826758-0b/s500x750/33673dc29bd01e9916d63ba85392607ad924f8a5.png)
![[start ID: 4 panel comic of Swansea, Anya, Curly, & Daisuke with the latter 3 being dogs. Panel1: Swansea is looking at a tennis ball in his hand while talking to an unidentified coworker. He says, "These 'Jimmy' brand balls are kinda sh*t, but they're cheap. That's good because Anya likes destroyin' 'em." The coworker replies with a raised eyebrow, "Anya? Really?" Swansea says, "Yeah, watch." Panel2: Swansea throws the ball towards Curly (golden retriever) & Daisuke (pomeranian) who are eagerly waiting a little further away in the grassy field. Panel3: Anya (borzoi/afghan hound mix) comes flying into the scene out of nowhere, catching the ball mid flight. Curly & Daisuke looked shocked. Panel4: Anya proceeds to tear the ball apart in a dust cloud as Curly & Daisuke watch on with wide eyes. :end ID]](https://64.media.tumblr.com/42e8f0f49272a07b7322562c130df771/4143c78a6a826758-36/s500x750/5e2712734aa4f268e4f131f819c6d02fe2b8c7dc.png)
mouthwashing dog au in which swansea owns 3 dogs 🐶🐶🐶
curly: golden retriever because of course he is. his previous owners shaved him (which you're not supposed to do to goldens), so his hair grew back in curlier than it should've.
anya: borzoi/afghan hound mix. she had to be a borzoi—the eyes called for it. she's also a trained service dog.
daisuke: pomeranian. he gives little yappy dog energy what can i say. he's still a puppy and can be quite the handful sometimes but swansea can never stay mad at that face.
had to include what i think swansea's dog form would be too of course. he's the most english bulldog kind of guy i've ever seen. it's the vibes.
EDIT: i guess i need to be clear that jimmy is the tennis ball and not an animal/living creature of any kind because he doesn't deserve it.
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