Tatiana's Diary Theory

neil’s favorite game is “i’m going to say something unhinged as fuck with no context and watch people try to figure out if i’m telling the truth or not”

andrew’s favorite game is “im going to watch neil say something unhinged as fuck and offer zero input on if it’s true or not (i know the answer) and watch everyone cycle through the stages of grief as they realize that there is literally no way of knowing without asking and they’re scared ask if neil really jumped out of a plane without a parachute once or if he’s fucking with them”

"it's all in your head" correct! unfortunately I am also in there

channelling Andrew Minyard fr

Every time I think about Neil Josten, I want to punch his stupid, pretty face. How dare he make me feel things

the biggest saddest eyes in class I exy :((

new and improved articulation that i still cant quite put into words the way i want to. hence diagram.

jerejean moodboards

read tgr a while back and can I just say, I am so obsessed with them. anyway, here are some moodboards I made. enjoy!

JEREMY KNOX

JEAN MOREAU

when you show up to the insane parabatai competition but will “jem is my great sin” herondale and jem “my will, my rebellion, mine forever” carstairs are already there

AHHHHH

the thing about neil and jean is that i very much feel like their relationship is mirrored in andrew & aaron's relationship. the 'misplaced forever partner' vs. 'the brother who was given away.'

the way neil was abused but he was KEPT, he had a mother who gave her life to fight for him vs. jean who was sold and forgotten and abandoned, stripped of his own name and his language, who had to survive riko and the master and the complicated dynamics of being perfect court but also property, who had to navigate the nest and all its horrors and hierarchy completely alone.

aaron who was abused, who was beaten and strung along and neglected, but who his mother came back for vs. andrew who was left behind, who never had a last name, who said 'please' so much at seven he can't stand the sound of the word at 21, who was willing to carve pieces from himself for the promise of a scrap of family.

andrew and aaron made a deal and hated each other for it. jean and neil were each others partners - your failure is my failure, your success is my success. andrew, who killed aaron's mother when he found out she was beating him, to hold up his end of the deal. jean, who held neil down to be carved, but who patched him up again after.

aaron, who killed his brother's rapist. and neil who did the same

pynch are trapped in a ya book like what do you MEAN ronan dreams about adam's fingers in his mouth and thinks gasoline is sexy ????

Okay but Down Bad by Taylor Swift is a kevjean song…