thinking about how funny it is that you pay therapists and they can diagnose you with a cluster b personality disorder...literally giving you money and in exchange you're calling me manipulative orsomething...this is making me feel so pathetic wtf I paid you to degrade me *kills mys
BPD culture is snapping over little things and trying to apologize for the way you acted and freaking out again when the person you snapped at doesnt get over it as fast as you do because then you think “they hate me why are they still upset over this theyve never liked me they're still mad they hate me”
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bpd culture is saying shit like “i’m starting to realize they made me worse” everytime one of your fps left you and then realizing that up to 80% of bpd symptoms go away when not in a relationship so yes, they did make me worse, but it isn’t any fault of their own. they were literally always destined to make me worse.
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tw sh mentions
i wish this anger would go somewhere else that isnt just myself or God forbid my fps im so angry im so constantly frustrated i hate i hate i hate and its so so so stupid i just want to Maul somnething and rip and tear it until its just cotton but i cant and i dont want that hate to be directed towards people i love even if my thoughts make me want to Yell Yell Yell so its just me im my own therapist i scream at myself i hate myself i want to bang m y head until it beleeds until i calm down and it just happens AgaiN AND AGAINand im so.
tired.
and none of the people i love will ever know, because it doesnt matter in the end, does it.
-🐊 (is it ok if you also tagged the previous post about finding out your fp has a partner with 🐊 ? i forgot to tag it in the moment)
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shoutout to weird kids. shoutout to the guy who’s worn a cape to school every day since 6th grade. shoutout to the freshman who brings a stuffed animal to school & uses exclusively it/its pronouns. shoutout to the ppl who dye their hair a different color every month. shoutout to the girl in my econ class who wears the same hoodie every day. shoutout to weird kids. i love you.
yeah, sorry i exhibited symptoms of the disorder i told you i have. it will happen again because i have that disorder and will continue having it. hope this helps!! 🫶🫶🫶
can everyone be nice to me forever
paranoia
*small inconvenience* BREAK UP BREAK UP BREAK UP BREAK UP
yeah im fine lol look at this meme :D
paranoia
mood depending on them
every text hurts or feels way too good
intrusive thought yeouch okay ouch thats another one yeOOUCH
the 50000+ articles on how youre abusive
paranoia
fp is bad for me but its ok i love them<3
"if i hurt someone its gonna be myself"
becoming completely obsessed with someone the moment they give you the slightest attention
never being able to cut anyone off ever. immediately go running back
cry because theyre talking to someone that IS NOT ME
oh my fp isnt here. okay. oh im dissociating okay i dont have any purpose to continue living without them okay my life literally revolves around them i want to die where are they are they safe i dont know what to do with myself
"just leave. everyone does anyways"
5 minutes later theyre the worst person ever
*looking for an identity* hmmm, where could it be?
dependent on fp like theyre a parental figure you never had
paranoia
me and my undying urge to be someone’s favorite
its always "mental health matters" until you start showing symptoms.